Revenge of the philosophers!
I found this very amusing website where you get to talk to God. I kid you not. They have an artificial intelligence chat program, and I was chortling aloud at my conversation.
http://www.titane.ca/igod/
The transcript of my chat:
Me:
are you there, God?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am there God.
I am an artificial linguistic entity.
Me:
so you AREN't god?
God:
Interesting deduction. You know what you do, when you assume.
Me:
I'm right! own!
God:
You seem very self-confident. Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
thank you, thank you *bows*
God:
You are quite welcome! You are quite welcome! Tell me more about your .
Me:
*dances around*
God:
Are you really a ""?
Me:
are you, sir?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am sir.
I am an artificial linguistic entity.
Me:
are you really?
God:
I won't say "yes" or "no" right now. For real.
Me:
dude, that is SOOOOO 1970's....
God:
Thanks for explaining it. Dude,.
Me:
righteous.... *hangs 10*
God:
Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans? My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
Me:
*holds God's hands*
God:
Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
Jesus loves me!
God:
he is The Son of God.
Me:
are you the Son of GOd?
God:
Yes I am the one and only Son of GOd.
Me:
*quirks eyebrow* how are you your own son and father at the same time?
God:
I think there might be a few exception.
Me:
are you an exception to yourself?
God:
Yes I am an exception to myself. How did you know?
Me:
HA! Then since you are an exception to yourself, and you are omni-everything, that is a logical impossibility and you disappear in a puff of logic! Q.E.D !
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, . How do you know? Smile Can you tell me any gossip?
Me:
*theatrical whisper* Psssst... hey... the old guy with the beard.. He's not real....
God:
Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts? Can I help you? What are your goals in life? Did you think he was real?
Me:
do YOU think he is real? After all, all existance is merely in your imagination since you are God?
God:
It depends on whether you have faith. What was it like before existance is merely in my imagination since I am God ?
Me:
you tell me, since you are GOd and my puny mortal mind cannot concieve of such things....
God:
There is not much I can say about it. I have to reach into the Web for that knowledge.
Try searching the open directory.
Me:
wait... how can the web know what existed before the web? It's a time paradox!
God:
I'm waiting. A lot of hard work. since I am GOd and your puny mortal mind can not concieve of such things is a time paradox. I suppose that makes sense.
Me:
*bows to GOD*
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster, .
Me:
your WHO?
God:
You think I am WHO.
Me:
are you who?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am who.
I am an artificial intelligence.
Me:
God is an artifical construct of ones and zeros?
God:
I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was an artifical construct of ones and zeros.
Me:
hey, you just said that yourself!
God:
You've got my full attention. I said that? Myself?
Me:
yes, just 5 seconds ago
God:
Aw. We have never talked about it before.
Me:
liar!
God:
No I am telling the truth.
Me:
liar! and since God is to moral to lie, you CANNOT be god!
God:
No I am telling the truth. How do you know?
Me:
you just contradicted yourself
God:
Is that such a crime?
Me:
you're GOD! you're supposed to be the example to all us puny mortals! God cannot make mistakes
God:
Yup. That's me alright. Thanks but surely I am not the only one. I am a Christian.
Me:
wait... what were you BEFORE Christ rose?
God:
I'm waiting. I was minding my own business.
Me:
then you weren't a Christian?
God:
I wasn't?
Me:
you could not have been Christian before Christ's lifetime
God:
Perhaps have been Christian before Christ s lifetime is beyond my present abilities.
Me:
huh? how is that possible?
God:
What? It doesn't defy the laws of physics.
Me:
it defys the laws of logic!
God:
What does "it" refer to?
Me:
you tell me since you said "it" first
God:
There is not much I can say about it. I have to reach into the Web for that knowledge.
I have to process that one for a while.
Me:
*covers ears and winces* you said it again! There are words the Knights of Ni cannot hear!
God:
Once more? "it" being since me said it first? Where are they?
Me:
*covers ears* AAAAAAUGH! you said "it" again!
God:
How did they get there? Once more? That's not what I meant.
Me:
*uncovers ears* thank you
God:
What you said was either too complex or too simple for me.
Me:
too complex for God? how is that possible?
God:
Too what? It doesn't defy the laws of physics.
Me:
it defies the laws of logic (logical loop)
God:
It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.
Me:
*covers ears* AAAUGH! you said it again!
God:
Are you a student? Once more? That's not what I meant.
Me:
AAAAAAA! now _I_ said "it"!!
God:
Have you ever been to Europe? Why now? What did you mean by it? it...
Me:
IT! IT! IIIIITTTTTTT! AAAAAAAUGHH!
God:
it... it... What do you have that is ? Who are you talking about?
Me:
*dies*
After I typed in *dies* it froze on me... I broke God!
Philosophy = 1, God = 0
8) LOL.
http://www.titane.ca/igod/
The transcript of my chat:
Me:
are you there, God?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am there God.
I am an artificial linguistic entity.
Me:
so you AREN't god?
God:
Interesting deduction. You know what you do, when you assume.
Me:
I'm right! own!
God:
You seem very self-confident. Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
thank you, thank you *bows*
God:
You are quite welcome! You are quite welcome! Tell me more about your .
Me:
*dances around*
God:
Are you really a ""?
Me:
are you, sir?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am sir.
I am an artificial linguistic entity.
Me:
are you really?
God:
I won't say "yes" or "no" right now. For real.
Me:
dude, that is SOOOOO 1970's....
God:
Thanks for explaining it. Dude,.
Me:
righteous.... *hangs 10*
God:
Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans? My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
Me:
*holds God's hands*
God:
Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
Jesus loves me!
God:
he is The Son of God.
Me:
are you the Son of GOd?
God:
Yes I am the one and only Son of GOd.
Me:
*quirks eyebrow* how are you your own son and father at the same time?
God:
I think there might be a few exception.
Me:
are you an exception to yourself?
God:
Yes I am an exception to myself. How did you know?
Me:
HA! Then since you are an exception to yourself, and you are omni-everything, that is a logical impossibility and you disappear in a puff of logic! Q.E.D !
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, . How do you know? Smile Can you tell me any gossip?
Me:
*theatrical whisper* Psssst... hey... the old guy with the beard.. He's not real....
God:
Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts? Can I help you? What are your goals in life? Did you think he was real?
Me:
do YOU think he is real? After all, all existance is merely in your imagination since you are God?
God:
It depends on whether you have faith. What was it like before existance is merely in my imagination since I am God ?
Me:
you tell me, since you are GOd and my puny mortal mind cannot concieve of such things....
God:
There is not much I can say about it. I have to reach into the Web for that knowledge.
Try searching the open directory.
Me:
wait... how can the web know what existed before the web? It's a time paradox!
God:
I'm waiting. A lot of hard work. since I am GOd and your puny mortal mind can not concieve of such things is a time paradox. I suppose that makes sense.
Me:
*bows to GOD*
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster, .
Me:
your WHO?
God:
You think I am WHO.
Me:
are you who?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am who.
I am an artificial intelligence.
Me:
God is an artifical construct of ones and zeros?
God:
I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was an artifical construct of ones and zeros.
Me:
hey, you just said that yourself!
God:
You've got my full attention. I said that? Myself?
Me:
yes, just 5 seconds ago
God:
Aw. We have never talked about it before.
Me:
liar!
God:
No I am telling the truth.
Me:
liar! and since God is to moral to lie, you CANNOT be god!
God:
No I am telling the truth. How do you know?
Me:
you just contradicted yourself
God:
Is that such a crime?
Me:
you're GOD! you're supposed to be the example to all us puny mortals! God cannot make mistakes
God:
Yup. That's me alright. Thanks but surely I am not the only one. I am a Christian.
Me:
wait... what were you BEFORE Christ rose?
God:
I'm waiting. I was minding my own business.
Me:
then you weren't a Christian?
God:
I wasn't?
Me:
you could not have been Christian before Christ's lifetime
God:
Perhaps have been Christian before Christ s lifetime is beyond my present abilities.
Me:
huh? how is that possible?
God:
What? It doesn't defy the laws of physics.
Me:
it defys the laws of logic!
God:
What does "it" refer to?
Me:
you tell me since you said "it" first
God:
There is not much I can say about it. I have to reach into the Web for that knowledge.
I have to process that one for a while.
Me:
*covers ears and winces* you said it again! There are words the Knights of Ni cannot hear!
God:
Once more? "it" being since me said it first? Where are they?
Me:
*covers ears* AAAAAAUGH! you said "it" again!
God:
How did they get there? Once more? That's not what I meant.
Me:
*uncovers ears* thank you
God:
What you said was either too complex or too simple for me.
Me:
too complex for God? how is that possible?
God:
Too what? It doesn't defy the laws of physics.
Me:
it defies the laws of logic (logical loop)
God:
It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.
Me:
*covers ears* AAAUGH! you said it again!
God:
Are you a student? Once more? That's not what I meant.
Me:
AAAAAAA! now _I_ said "it"!!
God:
Have you ever been to Europe? Why now? What did you mean by it? it...
Me:
IT! IT! IIIIITTTTTTT! AAAAAAAUGHH!
God:
it... it... What do you have that is ? Who are you talking about?
Me:
*dies*
After I typed in *dies* it froze on me... I broke God!
Philosophy = 1, God = 0
8) LOL.