[Quet - TSW] Personal Log
A series of muttered recordings.
MON 09:01
I don’t want to be right.
I’m the stupid one. Muscle and tits and a hammer, right? But even I can put a puzzle together if you stick the pieces in front of me. Can try, at least.
Really don’t want to be right.
I don’t think the others really got what I was saying. Not entirely. Dmitriy, maybe. Now he’s smart.
Worries me that he didn’t dismiss the possibility.
If I’m right…
MON 10:19
Been doing some reading. Phone browser’s good for that. Dunno that it’s an “if” so much anymore.
So If I’m right, we got a whole big-ass hive set up. Who’s the queen?
That Gaia thing sounds like a pretty good guess to me.
Ordinary folks, they’re just worker bees. Cogs in the machine. They matter, but not much. They’ll die working or defending the hive. That’s what they’re there for. They don’t matter.
Don’t figure we’ve been really treating ‘em like they matter, either.
Next up? Drones. Could be the… organizations. Not everyone there’s got a gift, I’m guessing. They get to pass their legacy on-but through us.
Us? Virgin queens.
I know, it sounds stupid, especially for me. It’s the bee term, though. Worker bees pick a larva, feed it up on royal jelly, and bam- queen. Usually more than one. Usually when the old queen’s dying.
Sometimes when the old queen’s already dead, it sounds like.
So there’s us. Workers chosen by some twist of fate to get these powers. Stingers that don’t kill us to use them. Does swallowing a bee count as royal jelly? I think it might.
Brings us right back to the problem of, first off, fuck that bee shit. It’s no kind of way to live (and thank whatever big-ass queen bee there is that at least someone agrees with me on that). Second?
What the virgin queens do is kill each other. Not always, but that’s not good enough for me. Whichever ones emerge first go and sting the other ones while they’re still growing, and then they turn on each other. Fucked-up bee Highlander shit. Strongest one takes over.
Lose everything or become a god, eh?
MON 11:50
Fuck it, I don’t want this.
I’m not gonna lie, I thought the bee shit was pretty neat at first. Not the bees, the powers. Felt like freaking Superman or something. Okay, no. Maybe Captain America’s a better fit. Improved. Better. Stronger, sure. All my life I’ve wanted to be some kinda hero. Thought I’d got my chance.
Fucking stupid Fisher.
Too good to be true, right? Nothing’s ever that easy. Fucking shitbrained idiot fuckup. Why didn’t I think about this? It’s not about the monsters, we’re the monsters, I don’t even…
Not really regretting not getting to watch The Hunger Games right now. Shit.
MON 11:59
Bees are fucked up and I am not a bee and I am not going to be a bee. I am not going to go and kill my friends-kill my brother-so I can sit around on my swollen ass and lay eggs all day. Fuck that shit. I’m not playing that game.
They say help humanity as a whole, not on a case by case basis? Screw ‘em. Someone’s gotta care about the worker bees, and I’m not playing by hive rules. Power, responsibility, all that jazz.
I’ll keep my ears open, sure, but my eyes too. Gonna have to fake it at least. Worker bees kill a queen they don’t like, one they think is weak.
Dunno if I wanna tell Ko about this. He listens to the buzz more than I do. He deserves to know.
Dunno what he’d do, though. Wild card, kinda thing. Better not take any chances.
MON 12:08
Good lay last night. Fuck, at least I can make one person happy, and I needed that besides.
More scars than I expected.
That smile, too…
Now I’m fucking wondering which of us is supposed to end up killing the other.
MON 12:10
I am not a goddamn bee.