I Would Take A Whisper (If That's All You Had To Give) - (9/9)
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Mark twists around slightly to face Eduardo more directly and Eduardo mirrors him automatically, “Wardo,” he says and something in his eyes makes Eduardo think or maybe this time I can win, “I, Wardo you’re not going to lose. Not ever. Not to Facebook, not to anything. Christ, I didn’t...it wasn’t like I chose Facebook over you, Wardo! I didn’t...that’s not what it was about! It was...it was because I -“
“Because you loved me,” Eduardo says quietly and Mark’s breath hitches.
“Chris and Dustin tell you in the letter?” he asks eventually.
“Yeah,” Eduardo says and looks down at their hands. “Plus I...I kind of hoped.”
“God, we are so fucked up,” Mark huffs shakily, like it’s supposed to be a joke except it’s really, really not.
“Mark,” Eduardo says softly and Mark looks back up at him, “You loved me all that time?”
“Since before Facebook,” Mark admits quietly as if he hopes Eduardo won’t hear. “I don’t even know when.”
“And you...you still love me?”
Mark nods. I can win, I can win, I can win.
“You love me.”
Mark huffs defensively, “Yes, Eduardo and it doesn’t matter how many times you keep saying it, it will still be true, so I would appreciate it if you -“
And then Eduardo’s kissing him. Hard. The hand that isn’t clasped in Mark’s comes up to cup Mark’s jaw and he kisses him like he should have back in the office or in the park when Mark had been laughing or hell back on that cold February day when Mark had shrugged and said sure I do. He kisses him and it feels like I need you, I’m here for you only this time he doesn’t know which one of those is him; and Mark practically melts against him, kissing back like this is all he’s ever wanted, frantic and desperate and grasping -
And then they’re not anymore because Mark has pulled away, his free hand shaky on Eduardo’s chest, “Wait, wait,” he pants. “Are you going to just -“
“I love you, too,” Eduardo says between breaths, cutting him off.
“What?” Mark freezes, eyes searching and finally allowed to be hopeful.
“I don’t know if I did back then,” Eduardo continues. “Maybe I did. It would certainly explain some things but...but I do now. For sure.”
And he does. He knows it so clearly and so suddenly that he must have known before in some part of him. This is Mark. Genius, stubborn, acerbic, socially incapable, ridiculous, impossible Mark. And loving him doesn’t feel new. It feels amazing.
Mark is looking at him like he’s half expecting him to laugh and say ‘just kidding’ but there’s a slow and tentative smile creeping onto his face. “So you - you want to - be with me?” he asks and he is obviously so unsure about how he is meant to go about this that Eduardo almost can’t contain the swell of affection warming his chest.
“I want to be with you,” he confirms and kisses both of Mark’s cheekbones because he can.
“Like...properly?” Mark asks, “Like ‘going on dates and cuddling on the couch and holding hands on the street’ be with me?”
Eduardo laughs happily and climbs onto Mark’s lap, arms coming up to rest around his shoulders and Mark’s hands going instantly to Eduardo’s waist.
“I didn’t have you down as the cuddling type, Mr. Zuckerberg.” Eduardo grins as he rests his forehead against Mark’s.
“I think I’m definitely starting to see the merits of being the cuddling type.” Mark smiles back and Eduardo just can’t help kissing him again soundly, Mark bunching his hands desperately in Eduardo’s shirt.
“You know,” Eduardo pants against his lips after several minutes of heated kissing, “If the circumstances had been different I would so be texting Dustin right now about you saying you wanted to cuddle and hold hands.”
Mark grins and lifts a hand to Eduardo’s neck. “Yeah well joke’s on you, he already knew.”
Eduardo pulls back a little. “What?” he asks, eyes shining with mirth. Mark blushes (Eduardo decides that blushing Mark may just be one of his favourite things). “There was a drunken night once, just before they got married and it only took a couple of shots to have me saying things that make me glad they can’t repeat them.”
Eduardo shakes his head incredulously and kisses him again because Mark’s lips taste like forgiveness and happiness and family and I love you I love you I love you and Eduardo doesn’t think he’s ever going to stop smiling.
“They’d be happy for us,” he says when Mark drags his lips away from his own and starts sucking along Eduardo’s jaw.
“Yeah,” he breathes, hot against Eduardo’s ear and he shudders. “I bet they’re high-fiving in heaven as we speak.”
Eduardo laughs. “You don’t believe in heaven.”
Mark pulls back to level Eduardo with a long suffering glare. “For the purpose of my mental image, I do,” he says, before wrapping his arms around Eduardo’s waist tightly and kissing his laugh into a groan.
Mark’s hands are like fire through his shirt and within minutes they’re roaming frantically over his back like they just can’t touch enough of him. Eduardo shudders and trails open mouthed kisses down the pale column of Mark’s throat, smiling when he pulls the neck of his t-shirt aside to start sucking at a collarbone and gets a breathy moan in response.
And then Mark’s hands are fumbling at the buttons of Eduardo’s shirt and Eduardo is sucking marks into the delicate skin between shoulder and neck, making Mark’s hands shakier and clumsier as he gets more and more frustrated with the buttons.
“Wardo,” he pants, annoyed. “Shirt.”
Eduardo huffs a laugh over the newly forming bruise on Mark’s skin and Mark visibly shivers against him. He makes quick work of his shirt, not even bothering to fold it before chucking it to one side and feels himself blushing violently when he sees Mark staring wide-eyed and hungry at his newly exposed chest.
“God,” Mark whimpers weakly before pulling Eduardo back in by the neck and kissing him so deeply that Eduardo doesn’t think before grinding his hips down, hard and scrambling to remove Mark’s own shirt.
It’s all a bit of a blur after that. He barely remembers how they got upstairs and into his bed; vaguely recalling spending a good few minutes pressing Mark up against the wall outside his room, rubbing his leg up in between Mark’s and silencing the answering moans with his mouth so as not to wake Rosalind.
He doesn’t remember when they lost their pants but they’re gone by the time they collapse in a tangled heap onto the bed, Mark’s hands slipping down his back and under the waistband of his briefs to make Eduardo jerk back into the touch with a shudder.
“Mark,” he gasps, pressing him down into the sheets with his hips and sucking behind his ear. “Mark.”
He remembers his briefs being thrown across the room and pinning Mark’s arms down above his head to kiss down his neck and chest but then it’s all a frantic, desperate blur of skin and hands and hot, wet kisses (and an impatient Mark urging Eduardo to ‘hurry the fuck up already, Wardo, I’m not gonna break’) between Mark’s boxers getting discarded and Mark’s pale legs finally wrapping around Eduardo’s tanned waist, heels digging insistently into the small of Eduardo’s back.
And then Mark’s chanting his name under his breath like it’s the only word he knows, like it’s the only thing that matters and Eduardo’s almost delirious but it’s like every single gasp of his name brings him closer and closer to fixing those desperate cracks in his being; like every thrust of Eduardo’s hips pulls him further from the brink he’s been teetering on and so Eduardo thrusts harder and faster until he can feel himself getting closer and closer and Mark sounds like a broken record that doesn’t want to be fixed.
*
When Eduardo’s eyes flicker open the next morning he doesn’t know whether it was the crying in the next room or the disgruntled groan against his collarbone that woke him. Mark buries his face further into Eduardo’s neck and grumbles something about cockblocking toddlers which Eduardo doesn’t quite catch but laughs at anyway.
He turns his face ever so slightly to brush a kiss through the curls nestled under his chin and tightens his arm around Mark.
“You’re gonna have to move if you want me to get up,” Eduardo mumbles, voice still thick with sleep.
“I don’t want you to get up,” Mark whines, but rolls off Eduardo anyway with a sigh.
Eduardo grins over at him and then, because he can now, leans over to kiss the pout off Mark’s lips. Mark sighs into it and Eduardo forgets why he has to leave the bed.
Except Rosalind chooses that moment to let out a particularly loud scream and Eduardo reluctantly pulls away and rolls out of bed, taking the time to stretch lazily before pulling on some pyjama pants and a t-shirt and smirking when he hears Mark stifle another whine.
When Eduardo opens the door to Rosalind’s room she stops crying immediately and reaches out with a grin.
“Pai! Pai!” she babbles and Eduardo scoops her out of her crib with a laugh and tickles her until she’s screaming all over again.
“Paiiiiiiii!” she screeches with a laugh and Eduardo takes it for a yield and stops tickling her to hug her close instead.
“Morning, querida,” he says softly into her hair.
Mark is standing in the doorway when Eduardo turns around and he’s smiling at them in a way Eduardo’s never seen him smile before. Eduardo crosses the room almost instinctively and leans down into Mark’s space to gently press his lips to the large dimple on Mark’s left check.
Mark’s smile grows impossibly wider and when Eduardo pulls back, Mark angles his face up and stands on his tiptoes for a kiss. Eduardo is just leaning in when the doorbell rings and their brief illusion that they’re the only three people in the world is shattered. Mark huffs.
“I’ll go,” he sighs, falling back onto the flat of his feet and transferring Rosalind onto his own hip. “You need to go get dressed for work anyway, right?”
Sadly, Eduardo really does. It’s the middle of the week and he has a meeting at eleven and he’s pretty damn sure ‘because I’d rather stay in bed all day with my cute new boyfriend’ doesn’t count as a legitimate excuse to skip work, so he lets Mark take Rosalind downstairs to answer the door and tries not to grin the whole way through his morning shower.
When Eduardo finally appears downstairs he’s a little more awake and therefore, thankfully, sees Charlotte standing in the kitchen before he does anything telling like shove Mark up against the counter. Rosalind is sitting in her highchair being fed by a cooing Charlotte and Mark is buttering some toast on the island opposite her.
“Mr Saverin!” Charlotte greets warmly. “Nice to see you got dressed for me this time,” she adds playfully and Eduardo’s cheeks tinge pink.
“Yeah, sorry about last time. We probably didn’t give a great impression.” He shuffles over to stand next to Mark and smiles at him softly when he slides the toast over to him along with a mug of coffee. “Thanks,” he says softly and nudges Mark gently with his elbow, smiling wider as Mark goes pink and nudges back.
Charlotte coughs pointedly and both of them turn to look at her. She isn’t saying anything, just looking between them with narrowed eyes that make Eduardo feel hot and uncomfortable. There is no way she knows. They haven’t even said anything to each other and he’s only been in the room for a couple of minutes and Mark wouldn’t have said anything, would he? And Jesus Christ, why is she folding her arms like they’re two naughty schoolboys caught cheating on a -
“What?” snaps Mark eventually and Eduardo can feel him readying for a fight beside him.
“I think you know exactly what, Mr. Zuckerberg,” Charlotte says with a frown.
“And I think you’re - “
“Mark,” Eduardo warns and elbows Mark before he says something biting and offensive. “Um, I’m afraid we don’t really know what you - “
“You had sex, didn’t you,” Charlotte says, unamused, and it isn’t even posed as a question. Eduardo feels his face flame red and Charlotte stands up with a frustrated sigh.
“It was the one thing I gave you strict instructions not to do and I distinctly remember you promising me there was absolutely no chance of it happening and - ”
“Pai!” Rosalind interrupts from the highchair, bored of waiting for Charlotte to continue feeding her and wanting to be let down, “Pai!”
Eduardo shoots an apologetic look at Charlotte and hurries round the island to lift Rosalind out and bounce her up and down gently.
“Look, I’m really sorry,” Eduardo says, putting Rosalind down on the floor with a kiss to the forehead. “I know I said you didn’t need to worry about that but - ”
“What was that she just called you?” Charlotte interrupts, curious. “Some kind of nickname?”
Eduardo shoots an unsure look at Mark but he simply continues to glare in Charlotte’s direction.
“Uh,” Eduardo says dumbly, “’Pai’. It means ‘Dad’ in Portuguese. I’m from Brazil.”
Charlotte’s face softens. “She’s calling you ‘Dad’?” she asks softly and Eduardo shrugs happily, the grin slipping unintentionally onto his face.
Mark comes round to stand next to him and slips his hand into his, squeezing.
“Yes,” he says defiantly and Eduardo falls in love with him all over again, “she calls him ‘Dad’ because that’s what he is. Look, I know you’ve been trained to learn a certain set of rules about what is and what isn’t good for a child but we love her and she loves us so I don’t really understand why it should be any of your business how we feel about each other as long as it isn’t homicidal.”
Eduardo bites his lip against a grin and looks at his feet. He feels like he’s twenty years old and at college with an amazing boy who he managed to befriend against all odds. He feels, all over again, like this ridiculous friend of his is standing there running his mouth off, getting them into trouble, yet inexplicably making Eduardo feel like actually he’s getting them out of it. He feels like they’re barely out of their teenage years and creating something together that is theirs and only theirs and this time? This time they’re going to get beyond the beginning.
When Eduardo looks up, he can’t read Charlotte’s expression. She is looking at their joined hands with a soft yet conflicted look and Eduardo does his best ‘doe-eyed’ expression that Mark had says he does so well.
Charlotte sighs. “Look,” she begins, “any fool could see that you really care for that little girl and I have absolutely no doubts about the fact that you care for each other,” Eduardo feels Mark squeeze his hand again and smiles, “but, Mr. Zuckerberg, the rules are in place for a reason, whether you agree with them or not, especially with a case such as yours. You are public figures, the both of you, not to mention the money and lawsuits and drama you have floating around in your history. If you are going to do this,” she gestures vaguely between them, “and I have no problems with you doing so, but if you’re going to do this then you really need to make it official.”
A heavy silence falls over the room until Rosalind knocks over a stool and Mark lets go of Eduardo’s hand to right it again and ruffle her hair. When he straightens again, she sighs.
“Okay well as far as Rosie is concerned, I am happy that this is the right place for her to be and I don’t need to visit again but just...just think about it, okay? Talk to your lawyers and maybe to PR and just...think about it.”
Mark shrugs stiffly and Eduardo opens and closes his mouth a couple of times before saying, “Uh, just so we’re clear, when you say ‘official’ you mean - ”
“Marriage, Mr. Saverin. Marriage and perhaps adoption.” She smiles then at the sheepish and awkward looks on their faces and shoulders her bag. When she reaches the front door, Eduardo trailing behind her with a rather dazed expression, she stops and squeezes his shoulder,
“For what it’s worth, Mr. Saverin,” she says quietly, “I think you two would be better together than you would be apart.”
And then she’s gone with a firm handshake and an encouraging smile and Eduardo closes the front door with a sigh. He stands there for a second, staring at the dark wood of the front door and trying to slow his heart. Distantly he hears Mark herding Rosalind into the living room behind him but he doesn’t follow them. He groans and leans his head against the door, squeezing his eyes shut and taking a deep breath.
“Is the thought of marrying me really so depressing?” Mark says from behind him and Eduardo spins round to - to what, object? - but Mark is smirking and Eduardo huffs a laugh of relief instead.
Mark smiles up at him and Eduardo wonders for the thousandth time how anyone could think him cold and drags him into a tight hug. They stand like that for a while, Eduardo’s arms around Mark’s shoulders and face buried in his hair and Mark’s fingers tapping patterns across Eduardo’s back like he’s trying to code him into staying.
After a minute, Mark brushes his lips over Eduardo’s neck and sighs. “I know we have to talk about it at some point but I would really like to just enjoy this for a while before we have to engage in more ‘grown up’ discussion.”
And Eduardo knows it’s kind of cheating, and he knows he could save them from possible arguments by insisting they talk about it now, but he’s tired and he’s happy and he’s Mark’s so he laughs and nods against Mark’s temple.
“I have to go to work,” he says eventually, pulling back slightly and running his hands up and down Mark’s arms gently.
“Work from home,” Mark suggests hopefully and Eduardo laughs again and runs fond fingers through Mark’s hair.
“Can’t, I’ve got a meeting at eleven. Hey!” he greets as Rosalind barrels into their legs and Mark bends down to pick her up. She grins between them for a second and then reaches out to pull at one of Mark’s curls.
“Mom!” she says happily and Eduardo bursts into laughter.
“Did she just call me - ” Mark is spluttering and looking so affronted that Eduardo has to lean against the door for a second and wipe at his eyes. When he can breathe again he slaps Rosalind’s free hand in a high five and Mark raises his eyebrows.
“What?” Eduardo grins, “You thought your chicken prank would go unpunished?”
“What?” Mark narrows his eyes and Eduardo just laughs again and picks up his briefcase from beside the door. He kisses Rosalind and then Mark on the cheek.
“You’re not the only one who can teach her things!” he says, and with a final laugh at the dawning look of realisation on Mark’s face he’s out the door and in the car, grinning all the way to work.
Asshole
he receives ten minutes later. He grins and replies,
<3