i take two pills at night to help me to not wake up from sadness. i wake up crying every hour and then wander around my house for hours while everyone is asleep. my mind too full to go back to bed
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usually i am the one to go against the tide, but not this time. anything i can say is the same as what everyone else is saying. "it was not my fault!" say it until you believe it. or go talk to someone. or something. because you're such an awesome soul, and you don't deserve this. at all at all at all. allow yourself to cry and feel and heal. help yourself HEAL.
lindsey, go to the hospital, the health center on your campus, or anywhere and get checked for diseases & take the morning after pill. file a police report. even if you don't want to pursue any type of legal action, go and at least get the information on the record.
as far as your mental well-being, i'm just going to tell you what everyone else has been saying because it's really really important that you know that this is NOT your fault. you said no. you're lovely. and no matter what that guy thought you wanted, you said no. no means no, and no consent is rape.
& i really disapprove of what your friends did. you asked them not to leave you alone and they did. but it's up to you what you want to think of them. they could have not realized where you were until you and he emerged. i don't know.
I can't say anything that everyone else hasn't said.. but seriously I can tell you're an amazing person and definitely not a slut, and no one ever deserves to be in that situation :( oh man.. I really want to hurt all guys like that dirtbag. It's definitely NOT your fault. I hope things start looking up for you. Hang in there <333
jesus. jesus jesus jesus. i had the most horrible feeling last night when I read what you wrote, i was really praying that it wasn't what i thought it was. but oh god. please, please please please tell someone. i know it's hard, i know, but you have too. pills are a beautiful thing, but life is even more so, don't forget to live, there's so much more.
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i love you, darlin'. breathe a lot.
<3jess
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as far as your mental well-being, i'm just going to tell you what everyone else has been saying because it's really really important that you know that this is NOT your fault. you said no. you're lovely. and no matter what that guy thought you wanted, you said no. no means no, and no consent is rape.
& i really disapprove of what your friends did. you asked them not to leave you alone and they did. but it's up to you what you want to think of them. they could have not realized where you were until you and he emerged. i don't know.
keep breathing, love. and you are not a slut.
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i don't want to say anything here.
i'm going to call you.
and we're going to have that cup of coffee.
i promise.
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