Comments | ityellsback: middle of the night updates

ityellsback

middle of the night updates

Mar 27, 2012 02:29

are always really good ideas, right?

okay so
M, can I ask you don't read this? yet, at least?
you can if you really want, or you can ask me what it says in rl and I'll tell you
but, no offense, you are pretty low on the list of people I care if this offends right now. I'll edit to make sure it is not mean to you at a time that isn't 2 in the morning.

so ( Read more... )

theory, please tell me if i am wrong or have sai, bodies

Comments 5

Saw note at top and did not read as per request, but herein is my apology ladymercury_10 March 27 2012, 16:03:26 UTC

I'm sorry if I said anything mean or idiotic last night. I don't want to tell anyone what to do, there are just a lot of things I don't understand about gender theory (Is that the proper name? I forget.), and some of the arguments seem contradictory to me. As we all know, I am excessively literal-minded to the point of critiquing joke logic, so (apparent) contradictions in arguments just make me cranky. But people should do what they think is right, and I am happy to adapt my pronoun use &c. to accommodate them, confused though I may be. Is that fair? Just like I don't expect to ever agree with my mom on certain things or understand her logic sometimes, but I still love and respect her.

I'm sorry we ended up arguing last thing before bed, that's always crappy. I sort of think it's cool, though, that we can disagree about things and discuss them and still be friends.

Re: Saw note at top and did not read as per request, but herein is my apology ityellsback March 30 2012, 22:43:01 UTC

yeah, and I'm sorry for the yelliness that is me in arguments. You could read this, if you so desired, I think, with the understanding that it is not REALLY directed at you. It came out of the feelings I had post-argument, rather than feelings directed at you.

I guess I should've told you, I had the stressful experience of hearing a man on a train in Chicago explaining to his friend why exactly trans* people are "wrong" and "need to go by the names their mothers gave them". It was upsetting to have that direct confirmation that yes, there are people who make moral judgments and actually express/act according to those judgments to the extent of shaming other people and refusing to comply with requests for pronoun use/name changes.

So this is much more directed at him, really, than you, and the anger is here is certainly not at you.

I am still trying to parse through my feelings of "doing nothing" instead of "at least talking about it positively". I feel there's something wrong in my automatic feeling of that's not okay, and I ( ... )

Re: Saw note at top and did not read as per request, but herein is my apology ladymercury_10 March 31 2012, 02:07:15 UTC

Ugh, that is not a conversation anyone would like to hear on a train. That sucks.

No worries as far as yelliness goes...we've all been there. :P And I'm very glad we're friends. :)

teagues_veil March 27 2012, 19:56:24 UTC

This certainly all makes sense to me. I have to agree that for various reasons biology can't just be ignored BUT that doesn't mean it needs to be the most important be-all-end-all factor OF DOOM that it is.

ityellsback March 30 2012, 22:55:06 UTC

Biology is relevant medically and scientifically, but socially I think it's pretty silly to think about it much at all.
Stuff like gender differences get really iffy, and maybe there's probably some wiring that's different, but that doesn't mean you get to treat some people as better/worse than others.
Exactly, it shouldn't be the be-all-end-all factor, so I think in a lot of cases it may be safer to ignore it from a social standpoint and let people do what they want.