[Two] Implied Consent: Dream a Little Dream of Me
Okay hi. If you did not get a PM/do not see your name on the PM list please reply with the words "add me to the pm list" because whenever I add people on the pm list, I'm too braindead to actually process information.
It has come to my attention that people just say random comments like "oh my godddd thanks for the pm" so thus, I would like to know if you guys would want me to do personal replies. If you say nonsense then I won't reply but I'll reply if your comment is worthwhile. Ask questions do something. iunno I like it when people ask.
I changed the writing style of this one and I hope this works way better.
Okay here you go, Selca 2.
This is for my number one~.
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Selca Two: Beautiful Contradiction
Although Taeyeon had agreed to Tiffany’s request of dating, she had not fully accepted the fact that Tiffany liked her and she definitely thought of it as a phase.
It was mainly her upbringing in a culture that had frowned upon homosexuality; just like how America did, prior to the sexual revolution. It was considered taboo and doing such a thing could cause social backlash; perhaps to an exponential detrimental amount as both of them would eventually turn into celebrities.
“Aigoo.” She pouted after realizing that she had left the stew for a long time. She was in her pajamas, cooking lunch for the two of them since she had already overslept her schedule for the day.
The sound of the door greeted her and as she placed rice on the table, along with the other entrees. Tiffany was lazily rubbing her eyes, with her short messy hair cascading a bit over her shoulders, while grabbing onto her fleece that she had unconsciously brought to the dinner table. Taeyeon couldn't hold in her admiration for Tiffany.
“Go back to bed or wash up, your sexshi look is too good for breakfast.” Taeyeon cringed at the fact that she had mispronounced the word, especially to the highly corrective American.
“But…I’m hungry.” Tiffany wshined and took a seat. After having placed all the dishes on the table, Taeyeon sat across from her. They ate silently with Taeyeon feeling relieved that maybe Tiffany had forgotten about last night. The kisses and the confession was something she wanted to yank herself out of without hurting Tiffany.
“Taetae…” Tiffany voiced out, which Taeyeon slightly disliked to hear. The pet names were something they had agreed to a few days after they had met each other, as both of them had difficulty in pronouncing each other’s name. Taeyeon responded back with Tiffany’s nickname. “…Pani-ah.”
“You…you haven’t forgotten about last night, right?” Tiffany spoke out.
Taeyeon saw Tiffany set down her chopsticks and hold onto it. For the first time-besides last night, she saw Tiffany show this unusual shyness towards her.
It certainly bothered her to a large extent. She was used to the cheerful, quirky Tiffany that would often spazz about some hot boy that they would meet in the SM headquarters, or heels that she had seen from an online catalog.
But not like this. Not like this at all.
She wanted to scream out a big “No” to retract her statement, but she understood the consequence to of doing such an act. Hurting Tiffany was something she had promised to never do, as the American was someone that had kept her company for the past few months.
“Of course not.” her words trembled as she forced out a smile. “We belong to each other now.” she said convincingly, more to herself than to Tiffany; but Tiffany perhaps sensed her own disbelief.
“I like you too, Tiffany.” she lied, in an attempt to place a band-aid onto the severed wound. Taeyeon understood that she was just digging herself a hole by agreeing. But at this point, she could only care about Tiffany’s feelings.
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Say, it’s only a paper moon
Sailing over a cardboard sea
But it wouldn't be make-believe
If you believed in me[1]
She laid down with her bed with her 50s music playing in the background. The wind chime sounded with the help of the airy breeze, and she immediately felt hazy from it. Her eyes were getting heavy, and she was almost about to fall asleep. But just right there and then she saw Tiffany pass by the door, and to the desk.
“I’m going to use the computer for a bit. I hope it’s ok.”
Again with the tenseness. Taeyeon clenched the corner of her blanket and held her tongue to ignore it. The awkwardness was causing her massive distress and she certainly wanted the old Tiffany back. But who was she to be so imposing? To be so demanding of her? To tell her what to do?
Her thoughts came to a standstill and she finally agreed.
“Sure thing.” she closed her eyes, only to be greeted with clicking sounds from Tiffany’s laptop.
Taeyeon eventually became aware of her own short-temper with Tiffany but she could not do anything to prevent it. Tiffany was merely doing things that did not intend to annoy her, and she was sure that Tiffany wanted to be as discrete as possible.
The vinyl eventually came to a halt and Taeyeon’s sleepiness dissipated. She opened her eyes to see Tiffany placing her head down on her arms while staring blankly at the computer screen.
“Hey.” Taeyeon gently called. “Take a nap, finish that later.”
Her old sister instincts kicked in. She clearly did not understand why Tiffany was resting on the desk when there was a bed, less than two feet from her proximity.
“I can’t. The sheets are in the laundry.”
Taeyeon then took notice. She had stood up to replace the vinyl with a 90-minute track, which was enough to lull her to sleep. Although Tiffany had insisted that she should just use her iPod to avoid switching from track to track, Taeyeon liked it more this way. It felt vintage, real, and in a way-classy.
While setting up her track, she thought of giving Tiffany the bed or rather sharing it with her. The former would mean that she would have to stay in somewhere less comfortable and the latter may mean something implied to Tiffany. But nevertheless, she did not want to settle for less and she certainly did not feel like giving up her own pleasure-as afternoon naps would be scarce with the schedule that was going to be implemented next week.
So when the music started playing, she took Tiffany’s hand, and pulled her to her own bed.
“Well sleep next to me for the time being. You can go back when it’s done.”
Taeyeon laid down to the side closer to the wall. Her bed was a small full sized bed but to her luck, she was small enough to accommodate another person beside her. When she finally held a good position to sleep in, she felt Tiffany’s head, nestled onto her small shoulder. Tiffany’s hand went over her waist and she could already feel faint breathing coming from the taller girl.
“Y-yah…Pani-ah.” She whispered to avoid waking up or startling her. But to her dismay, it seemed like Tiffany has either genuinely fallen asleep or would have preferred not to answer.
Taeyeon sighed at the situation. It was not because she did not like it. It was merely because it did not feel normal at all. Tiffany’s touch, elevated her senses a bit more and she felt comfortable. Actually...too comfortable, so much that it was causing her internal discomfort. What did this mean? Was she making her own lie her truth? Did she like Tiffany now too?
She felt confused and with that she shut her eyes and draped the cloth over the both of them. Her heart raced and she knew Tiffany heard this as well. She was caught, but for all the wrong reasons. So with that, she closed her eyes and let the current track’s lyrics linger on her thoughts. Ella’s Fitzgerald’s crescendo was her marker for the end of a song. At this point, she felt that there was no other way but to shut her eyes and end the wavering on her thoughts.
And time after time, you'll hear me say that I'm so lucky to be loving you[2]
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Though she had forgotten about it from time to time, Tiffany’s recent gestures had never left her mind-from the moment she woke up until the time that she retreated to bed. Though Tiffany had slightly regained her old self back, Taeyeon noticed a gentleness that Tiffany had never shown before. Words that Tiffany would use or at times-nervousness that she never knew Tiffany had in the first place, was being openly revealed to her. And in this, she must choose to either appreciate or ignore Tiffany’s actions.
Taeyeon was never really a 'chooser' even when she was still a child, but she found it strangely comfortable that Tiffany’s feelings was something that just happened without reason.
“Leaving?” Taeyeon crossed her arms and rested her back on the couch. She tilted her head to look at Tiffany who was putting on high heels.
Tiffany flashed her eyesmile that caused Taeyeon to chuckle.
“You’ll miss me?”
Taeyeon’s grin became wider that she suppressed by gazing on the television screen. Her thoughts never left Tiffany’s smile that was perhaps tattooed onto her memory by now.
She did not understand how Tiffany could mess her up so easily like that but she was also glad that Tiffany could. Doing so gave her a bit of an edge to her endeavors and as cheesy as it may sound, her days did become brighter because of Tiffany.
“I’ll miss you too. I won’t be long.” Tiffany whispered into her ear that caused her to gasp from either surprise or arousal. Tiffany then kissed her cheek and she smiled at her again.
“Be safe.” She heard Tiffany’s exit and she suddenly became bored again. Not that she wasn’t bored right from the beginning-but it was maybe-just maybe, because of Tiffany or maybe the television show was genuinely just boring her. Her bewilderment caused her inner discomfort that ended up mumbling like she was back to kindergarten where she was forced to say sorry to someone she hated.
“Please come back soon.”
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“I didn't know you were this shy Tippani ah.” Taeyeon said with a voice that was sufficiently audible to Tiffany.
“I'm not.”
Taeyeon waited for a reply longer than what she had received.
“…”
Realizing that she could not get a reply from Tiffany, she stretched her legs instead. She tried to get herself comfortable while sharing her full sized bed with the younger girl. Tiffany felt her movement and immediately adjusted her head to fit Taeyeon’s frame.
“Then why are you acting like this if you're not.” Taeyeon whispered again.
Tiffany still did not respond and Taeyeon felt that her point was more and more sound as the seconds went by. The whole afternoon nap thing had been the second time this week, it did not bother her at all. Tiffany’s familiarity with her body was something that calmed her than and she often grew hazed from Tiffany’s scent, that she concluded that maybe this was the reason that she liked the naps. Maybe Tiffany was somewhat becoming her own personal sleeping pill.
“Well let's just take our nap shall we?” Taeyeon took the remote from the edge of the night stand. She had her fill of teasing Tiffany and she thought that it was now time to put the teasing to rest. The clock struck half past two and she needed to the nap to re-energize herself for this afternoon's gym activity.
Despite of the fact that her frame is meant to be for a cute idol, it did not mean that she was exempt from working out or anything of that matter. Taeyeon, herself knew that she was meant to be leveled in different things-to diversify her skills as an idol in dance, singing, and maybe in acting in the near future.
“A--ah what are you doing?”she panicked when Tiffany snuggled closer to the crook of her neck. Whenever Tiffany had done such a thing, it had never failed to catch her in surprise and she had often wondered why that was.
Tiffany however, did not answer her question but instead, she had taken Taeyeon’s hand with her own. Tiffany had already closed her eyes that caused Taeyeon to sigh.
She stared at Tiffany with her head on her own chest.
“Okay, you win.” Taeyeon pressed play on the remote she held and the jazz music started playing. The remastered tracks that she listened to on her phonograph was something she was indifferent with, since it somewhat eliminated the old fashioned feel that she was used to.
But Tiffany continuously insisted in using her music player, as it provided rare tracks that Taeyeon never would have been able to get if she stayed with purely phonograph vinyls.
You smiled, and then the spell was cast
And here we are in heaven
And you are mine at last[3]
“Taeyeon, your heart…is it beating for me?"
She hesitated and her muscles became less tense. A “yes” means another lie to feed Tiffany, and a “no” would mean pain for all parties involved. Hurting Tiffany felt painful and this was because she thought of the younger girl as fragile and easily swayed by her emotions. Even though Taeyeon saw Tiffany as cheerful, preppy, and extroverted, being her roommate meant that she also knew what happened behind that charming smile.
“I…” She began and abruptly stopped. Tiffany was reserved in playing with her fingers and she took the time to observe her. Although she was not looking directly at her, Taeyeon was already aware that Tiffany felt secure and content in her arms. In the times that they would take naps together, she knew that her breathing calmed Tiffany. Her touch relaxed her, and Tiffany was even doing this by her own personal choice. Her boldness in confessing, her discreetness when they were in public was all proof of her affection for Taeyeon.
Did she really have the heart to break the girl’s heart?
“Yeah. It is.” She finally said after holding Tiffany’s hand onto hers.
Her heart skipped a beat slightly after saying it and her cheeks grew slightly hot after seeing Tiffany face her and smiling.
“I lov-Oh. Sorry I must’ve added that on your playlist by accident.” Tiffany said after hearing the track playing in the background.
Tiffany let go and attempted to stand up to change the track but Taeyeon’s hold on her wrist was too strong for her to break.
Tiffany saw Taeyeon let out a warm smile to her, and she felt glued to her feet.
The fact that the person she loved was smiling at her, caused time to go into a standstill and it made her heartbeats abnormal.
“Stay.” Taeyeon said to her and she grew weak in the knees. This was one of those rare times that Taeyeon actually said something affectionate to her, and she felt her senses elevate with the shorter girl’s actions. “I like this song. So it’s okay. Come back here.”
Taeyeon did not understand herself, what she was trying to do, but she found herself wrap her arms around Tiffany and Tiffany made herself comfortable, like in her previous position. But this time, there was something different.
At the moment, Taeyeon’s lie just changed to a semi-permanent truth.
Taeyeon’s heart was, perhaps, probably, most likely, definitely, maybe, beating for Tiffany.
Baby we make such a beautiful contradiction
Together we are in no two ways the same[4]
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[1] Ella Fitzgerald - Paper Moon
[2] Ella Fitzgerald - Time After Time
[3] Etta James - At Last(Best. Cover. Ever.)
[4] Musiq Soulchild and Beverley Knight - Beautiful Contradiction
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There. TaeNy's fixed. What now?
I have already written 3 but it is unedited. All I can say for that chapter is that they seem to can't stop making out.
I need to apologize to you guys because I did not update as quick as I promised.
Credit to seraphk for the proofreading/critique.
P.S. casper! your comment caught my attention:
is it only me who finds tiffany's sudden urges to kiss is.... SO CUTE AND INSPIRING! even herself, she couldn't explain why she did it at first.. next time, i'll do this technique to someone i really like.. lol.. and i'll let you know if it worked!
I hold no responsibility in the event that you may be charged of sexual assault.
Anyone found guilty of silent reading will be expelled from the so-called "PM list". Updating uh as soon as I finish Selca 4. Maybe after next week friday. We'll see.