(Untitled)

[jadedstar]

Even though it's been five years and I get to be with my son whenever I'd like, I spend Birth Mother's Day angry and slightly sad followed by Mother's Day in which I just have a cloud that comes and sweeps over me and if someone were to make eye contact with me I surely would burst into tears.

For me, Mother's Day is way worse than missing his

Comments

[_absolutely]

hi.. i saw you comment on grypx a while back, and i saw that you live in boise. i've been reading your public entries.. i'm not sure how active you are around here these days, but i was wondering if maybe you wanna be friends?

[jadedstar]

Of course! My activity goes in spurts here as far as updating but I usually read my friends page daily.
You've been added!
(btw, I'm Adria)

[_absolutely]

added back! i'm jen. :)

oh and i live somewhere in the north end too. lol.

[abnorml1]

Adria,
Does it make it harder because you get to see him? They grow up soooo fast..Pretty soon you'll get notes from Eric in the mail! I get cards my daughter makes and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

[jadedstar]

About a year ago I was really, really struggling with the adoption and felt myself pulling back from them a lot because that's what I felt like I needed. It made it worse, in the end though. Everyday is somewhat of a struggle (as you know) and certain holidays will always be hard, regardless of space or not.
I do know that getting to see him is good for me and it has been a looong time since I cried from leaving after a visit or felt heartbroken. Some days are just difficult and what sets me off isn't always missing Eric, that's just where my head goes, heh.

As for getting letters and notes in the mail, I have received a few and all I can say is Wow. He sent me a postcard from his pre school and I just about died from cute overload.
Isn't it awesome?
Do you think you will see her again?