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I shouldn't be typing, but I don't care. I want to live my life and I love to type:-P
I have insomnia. I haven't been able to sleep for most of this week. I guess it's life that's been bringing me down. I'm not so sure. I look towards the future and I get a big question mark. I look at myself and I realize that I have to make everything look like crap. Everything I have is awesome and doesn't look like crap. Even my pseudo boy toy is pretty awesome. I guess that I do this conversion into crap thing, because I don't have to deal with my feelings. Either that or I tell someone else, but the person I am supposed to talk to about my feelings. I am making an early secular new years resolution to try and think more positively about life and relationships. I need to stop freaking out about dumb things. I need to start listening more to my emotions and how I feel. I need to stop caring all the time about what other people think. I am getting sick of it and everyone around me is getting sick of it. From now on I am trying to push more towards improving my life and disposition. I need to wake up in the morning and think about how greatful I am for what I have. I may have lost some stuff, but I gained some great stuff from the losses. If I didn't lose the things in the past few months that were holding me back then all these great new changes would not have come to be. Josh is pretty good, aside from one thing, but he's improving. My job is pretty awesome. No one is really trying to hurt me friendwise right now, although Leah did forget to be there tonight and did not tell me why she was not there (yes I am slightly angry). I guess I just need to start looking at every day like my screen name itzabrandnuday. Every day is new and yesterday has gone and passed...That is how my life should be from now. Move forward and don't let anything from before hold you back.