I effing lost the ebay bid, 
I really wanted that camera too.
I really really really wanted it. 
Now I'm bummed and annoyed.

Dear Hellen, 
You're like the ultimate pick-me-up. 
Thanks for laughing and coughing.
Love Rachel

My friend Beth, from childhood called and wanted to hang out. I was excited. I hadn't seen her in years and thought it would be a nice time, just talking and catching up. I, however, was mistaken. She brought a friend (who is actually a guy she wants to date, who is stupid and smells...less than good) and we drove to freeport (at 9pm) because her  ( Read more... )

I had a lot on my mind when I woke up this morning. So much so that I woke at 7:30 and couldn't fall back asleep...if you know me, then it's weird. On a day off I should be asleep (at the minimum) until 9am. 
I haven't had a problem with anxiety for about a week...maybe a little less, which was Great because I'd had this panic-y feeling for about 2 ( Read more... )

First anxiety attack in the new apartment. 
it's not bad. 
Just there.

I want to curl up. I want to cry. I want to have a reason.
I want to disappear and reappear where there are hundreds of people. I want to be swallowed up in the throngs. 
I miss the city so much.

There isn't really anything wrong. Except for feeling like everything is wrong. Like I'm ( Read more... )

Sleep won't come.
I'm wrapped up in thinking about so many things and I can't make the thinking stop long enough to let the sleep settle in.
And I have to work at 5am.
I'm down. Blue. In the dumps. sad.
I'm not even really sure about what it is I'm thinking about. 
I'm frustrated with my choices. I hate not knowing what I'm supposed to be doing even ( Read more... )

Summer in Farmington is ( Read more... )

"Rachel wonders why she couldn't have a mom who cared more about her kids then herself."
You scoff: "How dramatic."

My mom and sisters left for new hampshire yesterday to visit my mom's family. And while I would have liked to have seen my great-grandmother or grandparents I may not have been that surprised to have heard nothing and maybe I would have ( Read more... )

but I'm making the most of it ( Read more... )

It was the Guerrette's ( Read more... )