Make a Wish
Chapter 4
“Stop looking so pissed,” Jaejun says as he gets a can of beer from the refrigerator, “want one? I have coke too.”
Nana stares at him incredulously. Is this guy for real? At least he’s hot, her mind muses. “No, thank you,” she licks her dry lips, “On second thought, I’ll take the coke.”
Jaejun stalks in front of her and hands her a can of coke, giving her a Cheshire smile. Nana glares at him and snatches the coke from his hand.
“Have a seat. Make yourself comfortable,” he gestures to the black leather couches standing proudly in the middle of the living room. Nana scoffs but slowly walks toward the sofas, glancing back suspiciously at the smiling man. The apartment stands at the top floor in a wealthy district facing the city directly. Nana can’t help but admire the floor length windows projecting the city lights into the living room. Nana settles down on a love seat as she further takes in the living room. A sizable plasma T.V. sits on top of a black sleek television stand with various DVD’s stacked around it. The flooring is marble, so shiny that she can almost see her own reflection. It is a nice apartment, a very nice apartment. But it is too empty for Nana. Everything in it is black and sleek, sleek and black; all are sophisticated and modern, each with a touch of loneliness.
“Do you live here alone?” Nana blurts out. Maybe she is too sensitive to the vast space, but her words hang in the open air like icicles.
“Yeah,” Jaejun shrugs his shoulders before marching towards her and sitting across from her on the larger sofa. He hands her a towel while tousling his own hair.
“It’s a very nice place,” Nana receives the towel and gingerly dabs against her skin.
“Thank you. I bought it with my first half-year salary,” his eyes go into a trance as if reliving the day he first stepped into the apartment and instantly fell in love with the view. “I was so proud.”
Nana didn’t know what to say because of the powerful emotions that circle within those brown irises. Wait, brown? I swore last night they were gray.
“Your eyes...” she points dumbly.
“Yeah, what about them?” the Cheshire smile is back, and Nana thinks smiles suit him better.
“They were gray the last time I saw you,” Nana states, cocking her head to one side. Jaejun chuckles as if she asked a funny question.
“Have you ever seen an Asian with gray eyes?” seeing Nana remains silent, he continues, “They’re lenses. Color lenses.”
“Oh, I thought only girls wore them,” Nana asks innocently.
“Well, guys can wear them too,” Jaejun laughs, not a bit offended by her statement.
“I guess so,” Nana awkwardly sips at her coke again.
Another silence falls upon them, only this time it is interrupted by a soft plop of white fur ball.
“You have a cat?” Nana gently scratches the creature behind its ear, eliciting a satisfied purr.
“Yup, but she doesn’t like me very much,” Jaejun watches Nana pet the cat. She’s so cute, but not like a doll. I can’t quite put my finger on it. The cat rubs against Nana’s hand begging for more caresses.
“Why not? What’s her name?” Nana coos at the cat, cradling it in her arms.
“Mochi. I found her in a box,” Jaejun tentatively reaches for the cat, but it buries deeper into the crease of Nana’s elbow.
“She really doesn’t like you,” Nana laughs, “This is what you get for dragging a poor girl to your place.” Nana stubbornly shifts away from Jaejun, her head turned away from him.
“Hey, you were soaking wet and didn’t want to go home. If I left you there, you would have gotten sick, then died a lonely death.”
Nana stares at him blankly, “You’ve got to kidding me. I’m still in my wet clothes!”
“Oh my god! I’m sorry,” Jaejun grabs Nana causing Mochi to tumble down onto the couch. She hisses venomously at Jaejun. “See, she falls from your arms, but still hisses at me!”
“Yes I know, this man is big meanie isn’t he,” Nana caresses the snow white fur earning more purrs from Mochi.
Jaejun throws his hands in exasperation that his cat likes someone that she has met for five minutes than him. “Yes, yes, I’m the big meanie, now come so you can change into something warmer.”
Nana follows Jaejun through a hall to a master room; his room, she guesses.
“Um, let me see if I can find anything you might fit into,” Jaejun opens his closet and sorts through his T-shirts. Nana looks around in awe. The room is exceptionally clean for a guy who lives alone. The bed is made. There are no pizza boxes lying around, no dirty laundry. The only messy part is his work desk which is littered with loose paper and packets of documents. Her curiosity leads her to the desk. She is careful not to touch anything, but a photo catches her eye. A stately man and a lovely woman is smiling at her, and in between them snuggled a tiny boy no more than 7-years old. That must be Jaejun, Nana giggles silently, he was so cute. She glances around hoping to find more pictures, but sadly there are none.
“Ah! I think you can change into this one!” Jaejun throws one of his smaller T-shirts to an oblivious Nana, resulting the cloth to land daintily on her head.
“Thank you!” Nana spits out her words as she tears the shirt from her head, “Very much appreciated. Now, what am I wearing for pants?”
“Pants?” Jaejun scratches the back of his neck.
“Yes, pants. You gave me a small shirt, I am not walking half naked, duh!” Nana grumbles, crossing her arms.
“Well then, here, take this one then,” Jaejun tosses another shirt to Nana, “It’s extra extra large, I’m sure you can wear it as a dress.”
Nana clutches the second shirt while giving Jaejun a stern look. After a few puzzling seconds, Jaejun finally understands the insinuation and steps out of the room to give his guest some privacy.
Jaejun chuckles inwardly as a wisp of not-so-friendly mumble slips through the closing door. It has been too long since a girl has lit a spark of interest in him. Maybe, perhaps, though most likely it is his unstable career that has led him to such state, but maybe, just maybe God is finally pitying him and his loneliness, so He has arranged for him and Nana to meet. If I didn’t decide to drink my ass off that other night, I might have never met this girl, Jaejun strips the wet shirt and throws it into the washing machine as he passes by the laundry room. He walks into the kitchen and rummages through some cabinets and the fridge, taking out various food and pots. It has also been awhile since he touched culinary supplies. Hopefully, I can still make edible food, Jaejun picks up a knife and begins dicing a tomato. He scoops the tomato into a pot, fills it with tap water, and then puts it on the stove. While waiting for the water to boil, he heats up another pot of water for the noodle. He nibbles at his bottom lip, waiting for the water to boil. The scene in front of him is ever so nostalgic: heating pots, rising steam, raw food, cutting boards; he misses them all. He misses his family. But I can’t go back yet. I have no face to face them; it’s shameful, Jaejun pushes back his bangs before brushing them down to perfection. The gurgling of water brings Jaejun out of his thoughts. He grabs a fistful of noodle and places it in the pot without the tomato and places the lid on top.
“Shit,” he curses as he realizes he forget to take out the eggs.
Nana stands at the doorway watching Jaejun gliding around the kitchen shirtless with a towel draped over his head. Why is he shirtless? Nana blinks furiously, keeping her perverted conscious at bay. The aroma of tomato and salt floats about the apartment. All of a sudden, Nana remembers she hasn’t eaten the entire day saved for that one slice of cake. She steps into the kitchen filled with curiosity as to what kind of food is Jaejun preparing.
“Hey,” Nana takes a step back when Jaejun jumps, startled, spilling a spoonful of soup.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry. You scared me. Are you ok?” He drops the spoon back into the pot before inspecting Nana’s arms and face for possible burn marks.
“Y-yeah, I’m fine. I didn’t get burned,” Nana struggles from Jaejun’s sudden hold on her wrists.
“Ok, that’s good,” Jaejun smiles, still clutching Nana’s wrists.
“Um, you can let go now,” she nods slightly, stopping at the line of tattoo across his left chest.
“Oh! Right, sorry,” he quickly lets her go, and his tongue peeps out before he lets out an embarrassed chuckle, “Why don’t you go sit at the table. It’s almost done.” Jaejun beams at Nana, and Nana feels a bit strange. She should be hating and being pissed off at this man, but she’s not. She should be depressed and solemn because of her ex-boyfriend, no, boyfriend, but she’s not. That’s right, I’m not single. I shouldn’t be at another man’s house, Nana sits down at the table, turning her head towards the kitchen. Jaejun stretches to take out two large bowls. Nana’s eyes trail up his spine; she can see the curve of his waist and the way his back muscle contracts. His skin looks so smooth, and from the back, he looks so huggable. This isn’t the time to be checking someone out. Remember, I. have. a. boyfriend. Nana sternly reminds herself. She rests her head on her arms. She really is exhausted. Since last night, she has barely gotten a wink of sleep last night, and with that picture text, her heart, mind, and soul are all exhausted.
A large steaming bowl of noodle is set before her making her lift her head to stare at Jaejun’s smiling face. She waves away the steam clouding her vision, and she looks into the bowl to see noodles and fluffy yellow clouds of eggs swimming in a red sea of tomato.
“Sorry, I haven’t cooked in a really long time, so if it looks weird, I’m sorry,” Jaejun laughs sheepishly.
“I’m sure it’s fine. It’s been awhile since someone cooked for me,” Nana returns his laugh, “Uh, no fork? Chopsticks?”
“Oh! Right! Look at me, I’m such a scattered brain. I’m sorry. I’ll go get them,” he comes back with two pair of chopsticks and hands one pair to Nana.
“It’s good,” Jaejun gives a shy smile. The first nice thing she’s said to him since bringing her back. He admits taking Nana to his house is a brash move, not to say careless, but he didn’t want to come to an empty house filled with his own misery. A lightbulb goes off in his head.
“I’m sorry for being so selfish,” Jaejun puts down his chopsticks with a serious look in his eyes.
“E-excuse me?” Nana cocks her head in confusion.
“For bringing you here without a proper explanation. It’s because of my selfishness,” his voice rings with sincerity.
Nana stares at Jaejun, loss for words. It’s as if he has changed into a completely different person. Where is the person who joked and mocked her just a few moments ago?
“No, it’s ok. See? You gave me dry clothes and cooked for me,” Jaejun almost wants to punch himself at her words.
“That...no...still...I’m sorry,” Jaejun buries his arm in his arms, his shoulders drop as if he has given up on something.
Nana isn’t sure what she should do at the moment. If she reaches out to comfort him it will seem as if she’s being too forward, but she can’t possibly sit across from such a sorrowful figure without doing anything. She scowls in frustration; she doesn’t know what to do at all.
“You should go put some clothes on or else you’ll get sick,” she tries the tactic of changing the subject.
“No, it’s fine,” comes a mumbled reply.
Nana exhales sharply, “What do you mean you’ll be fine? You came staggering in last night with a fever, your body still needs rest.”
“I deserve to be sick. It would be better if I die,” Jaejun lifts his head to show a worn out face, eye bags heavy with lack of sleep and worry.
“No body deserves to die, unless you killed someone,” Nana weakly fakes a laugh, attempting to keep the atmosphere light. She decides that since she can’t comfort him, at least she should try to prevent herself from falling into the darkness with him.
“What if I did?"