New Story: Haru

Oct 31, 2011 08:21

A simple trip to the brook to fetch water -- what could go wrong? Written for the birthday of my stalwart beta-reader, Ignoble Bard. Original characters. Horror rated PG-13.

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Comments 11

heartofoshun October 31 2011, 15:31:46 UTC
Great contribution to the Jael scary story collection! Nice work.

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jael_the_scribe October 31 2011, 18:00:17 UTC
Thank you. And, ostensibly, it's based on a true story someone told me online about how her grandfather got her out of a tight situation. Only he'd been dead for two years.

I goes like this: She was in her convertible with the top down, sitting at a stoplight at a deserted intersection at about 2:00 AM on a Texas summer night, when a group of guys pulled up beside her in a truck. There had been disappearances of young women in the area recently.

At this point, she heard a voice from her passenger seat saying, "Honey, floor it. Blow through the red light and get out of her." She turned and saw her grandfather, wearing the denim work clothes he'd worn in life. He repeated himself, "Get out of here. Do it now." She stomped the gas and managed to lose the other car.

"Don't worry, honey," her grandfather said. "I'll stay with you until you get close to home." She told me that two blocks from her house, he just kind of faded away and she was alone in the car again.

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heartofoshun October 31 2011, 18:14:12 UTC
That's a very cool story. I heard lots of those when I lived in Mexico and also growing up. My mother's family had a fair number of similar ones and ones about predictions of people dying. She claims also that their dog cried and howled all day on the day that my father's brother died during WWII in the Pacific, something they did not find out about until well after the fact. I mainly remember those stories because of my father throwing such a fit about her repeating them!!

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radbooks November 1 2011, 00:40:20 UTC
Oh, love it!! Spooky and creepy and made me shiver a bit. I was so looking forward to having a story from you today... well, hoping for one. :) Thanks so much!

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jael_the_scribe November 2 2011, 15:40:30 UTC
Thank you!

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drummerwench November 1 2011, 04:47:54 UTC
Oooh! Swell spooky story! That is very nice.

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jael_the_scribe November 2 2011, 15:40:50 UTC
I'm so glad you liked it!

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mthespinner November 1 2011, 10:06:46 UTC
Oooh-I love it! Goosebumps up my spine at the moment.

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jael_the_scribe November 2 2011, 15:41:43 UTC
More heartwarming than creepy, but I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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ignoblebard November 1 2011, 11:52:35 UTC
What a great story. I don't know how you manage to creep me out and bring a tear to my eye simultaneously but you always do. I love a good ghost story and this is exceptional. I look forward to your birthday stories every year and you never disappoint. *hugs*

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jael_the_scribe November 2 2011, 15:43:22 UTC
This has become a Halloween tradition, has it not? I am glad for the inspiration to get something written.

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