The Same as Always
Title: The Same as Always
Author:jamdsbandcrzy.
Pairing: No Pairing (Chinen's POV)
Rating: Pg-15
Genre: Angst, Hurt,
Summary: He writes...
Warning: Underlying mature themes
I sat there once again.
I sat at the same place I did each week, where the smell of ink was the strongest and the dust from the chalkboard hung.
I smiled the same as always.
I greeted each person again with this smile that I somehow got used to showing.
I would sit and look onwards, pretending to join in with them and be listening to their conversations even though it all sounded like a muffled buzz.
I would try and concentrate on the teacher and the board, read the textbook on my desk and take notes but the words would just fly pass and blur in front of me.
I just tried to get through the day.
I just tried to pretend nothing was wrong.
Everyday was the same mundane routine.
I went back to the house, waited inside, the same as always.
Then when the sky darkened, my bedroom door opened, I cut off all my senses and just listened to my heart beating.
I listened to my heart beating inside me, remembering that it was beating inside me and I was alive.
Later I would find myself in within my own bed sheets again.
A dirty worthless self left in within this bed.
I pulled this body into the bathroom, where the light blinded me and I would sink.
I would sink deep into the bath.
I wanted to wash away the dirt that seemed to just cling on me however knowing it will always cling to me.
Then I would wait for the morning the same as always.
I would wait for another the day, wishing it were different.
However, it would be the same, as always.
A/N: I just wanted to share this short piece of little writing i did.
It's actually more of a personal piece. It's not that I relate to it in any way but it wasn't supposed to be something I was going to post at first and just something I ended up writing one day.
This piece is more of a poetic type of writing and is more vague and therefore may require more thought to understand it.
It's in Chinen's point of view and I'm not sure if I want to write a fanfic based on it but I do have a part 2 to this piece which might help you if you're still quite unsure of what's going on.
I would be extremely happy to hear your opinions and maybe what you think is happening.
Thanks for reading^^
Author:jamdsbandcrzy.
Pairing: No Pairing (Chinen's POV)
Rating: Pg-15
Genre: Angst, Hurt,
Summary: He writes...
Warning: Underlying mature themes
I sat there once again.
I sat at the same place I did each week, where the smell of ink was the strongest and the dust from the chalkboard hung.
I smiled the same as always.
I greeted each person again with this smile that I somehow got used to showing.
I would sit and look onwards, pretending to join in with them and be listening to their conversations even though it all sounded like a muffled buzz.
I would try and concentrate on the teacher and the board, read the textbook on my desk and take notes but the words would just fly pass and blur in front of me.
I just tried to get through the day.
I just tried to pretend nothing was wrong.
Everyday was the same mundane routine.
I went back to the house, waited inside, the same as always.
Then when the sky darkened, my bedroom door opened, I cut off all my senses and just listened to my heart beating.
I listened to my heart beating inside me, remembering that it was beating inside me and I was alive.
Later I would find myself in within my own bed sheets again.
A dirty worthless self left in within this bed.
I pulled this body into the bathroom, where the light blinded me and I would sink.
I would sink deep into the bath.
I wanted to wash away the dirt that seemed to just cling on me however knowing it will always cling to me.
Then I would wait for the morning the same as always.
I would wait for another the day, wishing it were different.
However, it would be the same, as always.
A/N: I just wanted to share this short piece of little writing i did.
It's actually more of a personal piece. It's not that I relate to it in any way but it wasn't supposed to be something I was going to post at first and just something I ended up writing one day.
This piece is more of a poetic type of writing and is more vague and therefore may require more thought to understand it.
It's in Chinen's point of view and I'm not sure if I want to write a fanfic based on it but I do have a part 2 to this piece which might help you if you're still quite unsure of what's going on.
I would be extremely happy to hear your opinions and maybe what you think is happening.
Thanks for reading^^