(no subject)
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:47:25 PM): it's been a crazy day
dmbspidergirl (2:47:31 PM): tell me!
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:47:43 PM): okay, so i told you about the worst gifts ever eh?
dmbspidergirl (2:48:02 PM): yes!
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:48:08 PM): do you remember what they are
dmbspidergirl (2:48:17 PM): a wrench and a 50 cent poster?
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:48:26 PM): it's actually a sketch portrait, but yes
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:48:40 PM): anyway, everyone in the group knows about the portrait of "g unit" as we like to call him
dmbspidergirl (2:48:45 PM): i'm great
dmbspidergirl (2:48:48 PM): hahahaha
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:49:05 PM): beacuse when we go places i like ot hide the frame in my pocket and bring him out like when we eat or during class
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:49:14 PM): i'll just prop him on its stand
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:49:50 PM): so everyone knows about g unit and recognizes that i think it's hilarious and in turn, they think it's hilarious
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:50:02 PM): so last night i was going to leave my room to take a break from a paper
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:50:16 PM): i live on the highest floor, the tower room ,so i have to go downstairs
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:50:30 PM): EVERY time before last night, i would lock my door before leaving
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:50:44 PM): but last night i didn't because i figured i was only going to be gone for like, 3 minutes
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:50:55 PM): but i was actually gone for 30 or so
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:51:23 PM): so i talked to some people and on the way to bed, i open my door and notice that there's a piece of noteboook paper on my mirror
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:51:40 PM): and on the piece of paper there are magazine letters cut out to spell out words, ransom style
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:51:45 PM): it said
dmbspidergirl (2:51:46 PM): hahahahhaha
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:52:43 PM): "police line, do not cross. i'm scared. bad news. G UNIT is MISSING! NO police. >>>$10m - wait for further instructions"
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:52:55 PM): and i looked to where i usuallly set g unit up on display
dmbspidergirl (2:52:57 PM): hahahahha oh ryan
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:52:58 PM): and it was gone
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:53:10 PM): someone KIDNAPPED g unit
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:53:44 PM): naturally, i went right back downstairs to talk to all the other people who lived in my hall. i was like, "ha ha, whatever. i need that picture back"
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:53:50 PM): and everyone claimed to have no idea where it was
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:54:05 PM): and i figured, "fuck it, i'll just make a scene in class tomorrow and ham it up"
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:54:41 PM): so i wake up this morning, and i take a piece of paper out of my notebook. i draw a shitty police sketch of a "Missing G Unit" and before class begins, i say, "can i make an announcement?2
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:54:52 PM): so i get up and show everyone the magazine cut-out ransom note
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:54:56 PM): and act all serious and stuff
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:55:03 PM): of course this si getting hueg laughs because i have a straight face
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:56:15 PM): and i say something like, "last night i was affected in a very personal way. i walked in my room and discovered this ransom note. if anyone has any information on the whereabouts of G Unit, please let him know that i miss him and i'm scared too... i went to the police and had them do a sketch" and then i pulled out my shitty stick figure sketch of g unti
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:56:36 PM): so everyone is basically freaking out as well as the teacher
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:56:44 PM): he takes a photo of me pleading with everyone
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:56:55 PM): and then we had class cause no one was fessing up
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:57:03 PM): eeveryone laughed as if they were seeing it for the first time
dmbspidergirl (2:57:17 PM): hahahah ryan you are so great
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:57:33 PM): but then class was cut short because today was the day that my professor had to get his haircut and shave his mustache because i wore the skirt
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:57:44 PM): so the entire class left 2 hours early again.
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:57:52 PM): however i was the only one who went with him to get it all done
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:58:14 PM): some gay british dude cut his hair and ripped on him for "not being in the year 2005"
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:58:21 PM): and then the other gay dude gave him a wet shave
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:58:24 PM): with a real blade
dmbspidergirl (2:58:31 PM): whoa
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:58:32 PM): he looks 20 years younger, by the way
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:58:40 PM): and awesome
dmbspidergirl (2:58:40 PM): haha, good call on your part
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:58:59 PM): and then we were all going to surprise his wife and son because they had never seen him without it
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:59:07 PM): but they were asleepa nd couldn't be disturbed
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:59:10 PM): so i went back to lunch
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:59:38 PM): blah blah blah, tried to work on paper while everyone else did shit. so i'm in my room and decide to juts go back downstairs to ask for my picture back again cause i needed it
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:59:43 PM): everyone plays dumb again
Fin de Siecle 5 (2:59:44 PM): but then
dmbspidergirl (3:00:28 PM): i love that you are making this story so intense
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:00:37 PM): i was checking everybody's room for the picture when lacey said, "how do we know YOU didn't steal it. maybe we should check YOUR room" and that was weird cause normally she'd never go up to my room
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:00:41 PM): cause she just doesn't care#
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:00:47 PM): but it didn't mean anything at the time
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:01:04 PM): so i go up to my room and am like, "okay, check around..." but i noticed that she wasn't in the room behind me
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:02:29 PM): the door was opened slightly before she came in.. so i walked to the door to ask why she wasn't coming in and she's like, "um, did you see this?" and i look down right in front of the door and there sat a developed photograph of G Unit with a caption bubble saying, "I'M REALLY SCARED!" i freaked out beacuse i had JUST talked about the damn picture and randomly decided to go back upstairs i wondered at the moment how that got there.
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:02:38 PM): then i realized there was a note on the back of the print
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:02:39 PM): it said
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:03:22 PM): "to find your "unit" head to borders. find vanessa, get your orders. hurry! all clues will self-destrucit in T-30 minutes"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:03:32 PM): and then i was really freaking out because it turned into a mystery!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:04:06 PM): so i'm ranting and while i'm ranting something randomly falls off my desk so we all think someone else is in my room so while i'm already screaming, i'm like, "NOW WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!?!?
dmbspidergirl (3:04:49 PM): hahahahhaha
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:05:13 PM): so then i was just completely diverted from my paper and had to walk all the way ot fucking borders. cambridge is a windy city with many different paths and quaint commercial roads. i dind't quite rmemeber where the store was, so lacey said she'd come with... but she made it seem like she had "no idea" what was going on
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:05:35 PM): so we leave and i decided before i left that i was going to make this entire mystery into a rylenol
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:05:43 PM): so i documented everything on video
dmbspidergirl (3:06:07 PM): YES
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:06:36 PM): so on the way to borders, i see this one dude wearing a shirt that says "HOAX" and i was joking around, saying, "man, it's a hoax" and she laughed. that comes up later. anyway, we get to borders and we;'re searching for vanessa
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:06:59 PM): finally find her upstairs, and she's reading a book. she gives me a smile as thought something's going on, but she claimed to have "no idea"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:07:23 PM): i showed her the first clue and she says, "oh, wellt his random person just came up to me and gave me this book. he said i'm supposed to give it to you."
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:07:31 PM): and i take the book and it says "hip hop"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:07:44 PM): and i open the book and inside is another developed print!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:07:52 PM): i'm like, "oh great, i'm never going to get this done
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:08:19 PM): so it's basically the same photo, only this time the caption reads, "HELP ME I'M REALLY SCARED!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:08:26 PM): and i checked the clue on the back
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:08:27 PM): it said
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:09:22 PM): "at number 13 clarendon st you must get through the door, if this money doesn't work, try flattery galore. be there by 4:45" and then, taped to the back is 50 cents. it took me a while to get the reference.
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:10:06 PM): so i was thinking, "what the hell is this address? isn't that where gleason lives?
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:10:16 PM): and it was indeed the professor's rented apartment
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:10:36 PM): so we went there and the door was propped open by a fire extinguisher
dmbspidergirl (3:10:41 PM): someone was really clever to come yup with all of this
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:10:54 PM): we walked up the stairs and under their front door was another clue
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:11:00 PM): and i was like, "SON OF A BITCH"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:11:12 PM): you know, pretending to be mad buit really not caring
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:11:23 PM): this one was another magazine cut out
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:11:50 PM): it said
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:12:53 PM): "RUB A DUB DUB. 50 NOT IN DA CLUB. GO BACK TO HUGHES. U CAN FIND ME CHILLIN IN DA TUB" and then on the side it's a 50 cent quote that says "i'm the closest thing that hip hop has to God"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:12:58 PM): hughes is where i live, by hte way
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:13:51 PM): so i'm thinking, "oh how convenient to shuttle me all over town." there are a bunch of large bathtubs in the separate bathrooms here
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:14:08 PM): so i go back to my floor and look in the tub i usually see... and the door was locke.d.
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:14:28 PM): i was knocking and no one answered... then i said, "is anyone in there?" and no one answers and it's still locke.d
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:14:47 PM): i'm thinking, "jesus." and check the other tubs on the floor which have nothing in them
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:15:02 PM): and then all the pepole on my floor and there and i'm ranting again about walking all over town for clues
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:15:06 PM): and yielding nothing
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:15:28 PM): and then i complain that the door is locked and they kepe saying, " well maybe someone is taking a bath" and then i said, "well they'd fucking answer if they were"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:15:59 PM): and then they say something that seemed mysterious, but i wasn't going to yell at them just yet cause everyone was still quite straight faced and secretive as thought they didn't have anything to do with hit
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:16:13 PM): so they're like, "well jesus ryan, maybe it's a differnet floor"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:16:26 PM): which didn't make any sense to me because we're never on other floors
dmbspidergirl (3:16:36 PM): this is the best story i've ever heard
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:16:42 PM): but eventually i went down to check shit out to try and find another clue
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:17:26 PM): i find a tub with nothhin in it.. but further down the hall of the second floor there's a mysterious bathroom with elevated shower stalls and a bathtub located in on a room on the side... it's completely white.
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:17:51 PM): i walk in there carefully, just waiting for some shit to pop out at me, but there was no one in there #
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:18:27 PM): i finally got to the tub and noticed that on the bottom of the tub was an old skeleton key...and another note! the key reminded me of something out of zelda or something
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:18:53 PM): it was the key to the locked bathroom upstairs! i knew it! i used my deductive reasoning from all the role playing video games
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:18:56 PM): the note said
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:19:13 PM): "SORRY, THIS TUB JUST DIDN'T PLEASE ME. TRY AND FIND ME USING THIS KEY!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:19:24 PM): so i'm all, "omg omg omg!"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:19:31 PM): " the SECRET ROOM!"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:19:54 PM): so i'm walking back up to the original room and i show everyone the zelda key and they're all "what the hell!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:20:15 PM): so i walk down the dark hallway to the secret tub room
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:20:47 PM): put in the rusty old key and open the door... it's still light outside so the sun shined through on another completely white bathroom
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:21:13 PM): once my eyes adjusted to the bright lights i noticed that in the tub was an orgy of magazine cutouts! they were alll of model!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:21:17 PM): there was another note too!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:21:25 PM): it said
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:21:46 PM): "SORRY I COULDN'T BE A GOOD HOST. HAD TO RUN AND MAKE ME SOME TOAST! (HELP YOURSELF TO THE LADIES)"
dmbspidergirl (3:21:55 PM): hahahahahahahhahahaa
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:22:08 PM): and i was like, "toast?! i always make toast in the kitchen down the hall"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:22:19 PM): here, kitchens are called "gyp rooms"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:22:43 PM): so i left the orgy and walked down the hall with the other clue toward the gyp room
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:22:57 PM): in the gyp room they don't have a regular toaster
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:23:17 PM): they have a girll with gas powered flames that bear down on top of the tray of toast
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:23:30 PM): so i go in there and pull out the tray and on the tray there's another damn clue note!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:23:51 PM): "SORRY G, IT'S BEEN A BALL. WAIT AND DINE WITH THE CULPRITS AT HALL"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:24:10 PM): so that basically meant that i had to wait until dinner in the cafeteria to see the conclusion#
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:24:23 PM): and it was 5pm. dinner starts at 6;30
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:24:36 PM): but the doors don't open until exactly 630
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:24:55 PM): so i got there early with a couple other people, wondering if they somehow got in before they opened the doors
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:25:01 PM): i walk in and there's nothing at our table
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:25:20 PM): in the cafeteria line there's a wall separating the view to our table
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:25:46 PM): so i'm in line and other people are arriving... i'm anticipating that while i'm in line, something is going to be happening at my table so i just pretend like i dont' know it and wait
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:25:56 PM): then i get out of line and look at my table and eventually sit down and nothigns there
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:26:03 PM): other people come and nothing's there
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:26:27 PM): so they're all asking me why i think nothigns there and i went through my entire deductive reasoning on who probably did it and how
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:26:36 PM): like the end of scooby doo or somethig
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:26:47 PM): and they're all like "whatever"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:26:54 PM): cause i was basically accusing all of them
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:26:55 PM): side note
dmbspidergirl (3:26:58 PM): haha
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:27:51 PM): there is another school here visiting from minnesota. some school called carlton. so they were sitting at another table. so i'm sitting down, and suddenly, from another table, some dude walks up and looks me directly in the eye and says, "i'm supposed to give you this." and walks away
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:27:58 PM): i'm like, "COME ON!"
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:28:04 PM): cause i had never met the dude before
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:28:17 PM): so that was it. i had it back
dmbspidergirl (3:28:26 PM): WHAT
dmbspidergirl (3:28:31 PM): did you ever find out who did it!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:28:53 PM): that's the thing. for the rest of dinner i went througn my entire synopsis of who did it and why!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:29:16 PM): up in the tower there's another dude in our group who lives across the hall
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:29:23 PM): his name is jaime
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:29:36 PM): earlier in the day i was talking to him about whether or not he knew who took it
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:30:54 PM): and he's a rather quiet guy and really doesn't have the brains to come up with something like that. anyway, i mentioned to him how it was "the only time i didn't lock my door since i was here." and then HE said, " yeah, i know. usually i can hear you lock it." iti didn't mean anything to me when he said it, but then it all made sense! HEEEE was the only one that could've known my door would be unlocked at that specific time
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:31:24 PM): because HEEEEES the only one that can hear me lock it or not
dmbspidergirl (3:31:29 PM): ah!!!!!!!!!!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:31:36 PM): I CRACKED THE CASE!!!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:31:44 PM): there were other factors, but that was the main one
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:32:15 PM): i was shooting out deductive reasoning all over the fucking place!
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:32:22 PM): god it was great
dmbspidergirl (3:32:32 PM): detective day, hahahaha
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:32:39 PM): so that's about it.
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:36:55 PM): you're lucky i even typed that shit out. i figured i'd never want to spend the time recreating that
dmbspidergirl (3:37:39 PM): aww that means you must like me
Fin de Siecle 5 (3:37:46 PM): ew
dmbspidergirl (3:37:49 PM): :-)