wasted more time tonite pretending anyone cares about the next chapter...here it is:
*49*
After Jared’s words were out, there was nothing else for Lili to say or do except let him go ahead and give her that examination, though both of them were startlingly silent as he did. It wasn’t so much that Jared had somehow convinced her that all her fears were really unwarranted as much as the fact that she honestly didn’t have the energy any longer to ‘fight him every step.’ as he called it. Additionally, she didn’t want to fight with him about anything, ever, but she had kept all those fears inside for so long, she was unable to stop them from all leaving her lips the second she received any sort of prodding to talk about her feelings. After all, she had went from spending two months with someone who avoided most emotional confrontations or confessions at all, to now being with the most emotionally sensitive of all three of the men who she still had in her life. It was quite the adjustment to make overnight, especially in her current emotionally frayed state of her own.
Once he had finished that examination, Jared didn’t look overly happy with anything he had found but in keeping with the tense silence between them, he didn’t say much as she dressed again. He simply pointed out that she was lacking some very important vitamins she would need, and then offered to try and locate any food sources in the still cold temperatures that would provide those particular supplements. And with that, he gathered together some clothes and food for the day, and headed out to locate anything that would help keep her in a healthier state than she currently was, and that was that.
During their first full day back together again, the time they were actually together didn’t amount to much at all, as Jared didn’t even return to the shack again until sunset. Lili had spent the day watching the door and trying to think of anything she could say that would help the tension between them at all after that morning. Though, by the time he did return, exhaustion and cold had forced her to already curl up in her covers for the night ahead.
When she heard footsteps approaching the shack again after sunset, Lili rolled over, still awake despite her exhaustion and craned her neck to glance back at the door once again, “Is that you, Jared?” she finally called out hoarsely.
“I should hope so.” was his only response through the wall of the shack, though he did not yet come inside, as she could then hear him rattling around outside for several moments still, as though attempting to locate something or perhaps prepare a dinner for them.
Lili waited a few more moments, listening to him outside before she finally let out a heavy sigh and pushed herself up out of the covers once more. She then moved to poke her head out of the door at last where he did seem to be preparing something over the fire.
“You’ve been outside all day, aren’t you freezing?” she asked, her voice still a little hoarse from not only lack of use that day, but also from the cold temperatures.
“I’ve been outside for two months, and inside isn’t really that much warmer, anyway.” he responded, though didn’t glance back at her for long as he quickly returned his attention back to the mixture he was preparing, “Have you eaten yet?” he finally asked, though kept his eyes on his task.
“This afternoon.” she offered quietly, which did cause him to glance back at her again.
“Lili.” he began in a slightly scolding tone, but seemed to just as quickly bite back the rest of his original sentence, “Well, I don’t know how filling this will actually be, but these plants I found today should give you some of the vitamins you need right now.”
“You’re boiling a bowl full of plants?” she asked with slightly wrinkled nose.
“Think of it as a stew.” he shrugged slightly, though kept his eyes on the soupy mixture.
“Doesn’t really smell like a stew.” she denied, though weakly as she remained leaning against the doorway of the shack.
“Well, this is just the plant part, I mean, I guess we could add other stuff to it.” another small shrug on his part.
“You hiding a spice rack I haven’t seen?” Lili allowed a short-lived smirk.
Jared allowed only a shadow of a smile before responding, “You know of a lot of medicine that actually tastes good?”
“Most of the time it’s in a pill, so taste isn’t really a concern.” she pointed out with a little sigh as she finally moved to take a seat next to where he continued to heat the mixture.
“The good ole days.” he allowed his own small smirk.
Lili sighed again as she leaned in to look over the contents of the pan he heated, “But these aren’t even earth plants, are we sure they’re even safe?”
Somehow her asking that question actually caused a real smile to grace his lips, though he quickly hid it when her eyes turned back to him for his response, “I was a scientist first. Even if they don’t have the exact stuff you need, you know I won’t give you anything that will hurt you.”
“Does that definition of hurt include puking because of the taste and/or smell?” she asked with another wrinkle of her nose.
“Can’t wait ‘til you’re in my position.” he smiled slightly as he continued working with what essentially looked like a bowl of weeds and water.
“Come again?” she asked as she looked over at him with a raised eyebrow.
“You know, in a few years when your child gets some kind of bug, and you have to try and convince them to take their medicine.” he clarified, allowing only the slightest smile over at her, trying not to notice the way she flinched ever so slightly at his words.
Lili took a slight breath to compose herself before continuing the conversation, “So, I’m the child in this scenario?”
“Well, you are the one who needs to take your vitamins, so I suppose so.” he attempted another smile.
“I am seven years older than you, you know.” she scowled slightly over at him before turning her eyes back to the soupy substance as more steam rose from the contents.
“I’m aware.” he smiled again, then handed her the pan and the long spoon, “Now keep stirring while I try and find something to cleverly disguise the taste for you, little one.” he allowed a slight chuckle as she grudgingly took the pan and the spoon from him.
“Little one? Not hardly.” she scoffed, though with a lack of seriousness.
“Well, I am foot taller than you. It fits.”
“That’s just because you’re insanely tall.” she mumbled, though his only response was another soft smile back at her as he began digging through the cooler for what food was still currently stored there.
After adding some chunks of meat to the mix and cooking it over the fire for several more long moments, Jared finally informed her that it was ready and offered her a large helping before going to get water for them both.
She was still stirring the contents of the bowl around when Jared returned to her side and handed her an equally large helping of water, “You’re not having any?”
Jared just allowed a slight smile as he took a seat next to her, “More concerned with getting the food and vitamins into your system right now. I snacked a little on the way back, anyway.”
“I’m not sure if that’s chivalry or you just finding an excuse to avoid having to get any of this down, yourself.” she returned with narrowed eyes.
“The vitamins are a little more important for you to have right now, Lili.” he assured, “If I get hungrier later, I’ll manage something.”
“Great. All this, just for me.” she mumbled as she lifted a spoonful before inspecting it and dumping it back into the bowl once more.
“You haven’t even tasted it yet.” he scolded before taking a sip of water.
“Yeah, there’s a reason for that.” she grumbled before attempting to lift another spoonful from the bowl and looking at it just as suspiciously in the firelight.
“Lil’.” he scolded again.
“Why are you playing the parent here?” she mumbled once more.
“Well, technically I could be looking out for the well-being of my child as well as you, couldn’t I? We’re still not positive on that, after all.” he admitted with another quiet sip of his drink. Though, her only response was another sigh as she looked down at the food once more, “Come on, Lili, at least try it before you decide it’s gonna be awful, ok?”
“And if it is?”
“Have you been eating a lot of gourmet food that I don’t know about, lately? I think you can handle it.”
“Doesn’t mean I have to enjoy it.” she grumbled again.
Jared then allowed a slight pause before he spoke again, “I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”
“And how do you plan on doing that, exactly?” she asked as she looked back toward him with a raised brow.
Jared just chuckled slightly, “Not gonna let you know if you won’t even take the first bite. Now get eating.” he smiled again, gently squeezing her shoulder as he stood.
“I sense trickery.” she scowled up at him as he moved back toward the door of the shack.
“Such trust.” he smirked again as he headed inside, leaving her to her meal.
It was about a half an hour later when Lili joined Jared inside the shack. He had already curled into the covers himself, the night’s chill having gotten to him more than he had let on earlier. As she reached her sleeping quarters, Jared had just finished checking for any messages from Kyle and was setting the small handheld computer aside as she approached.
“So, was it as terrible as you thought it would be, honestly.” he had to add.
“It wasn’t my favorite meal.” she began as she moved to turn out the lamps that lit the inside of the shack.
“But?” he prodded.
“It wasn’t awful, just kinda really, really bland.” she admitted as she turned off the second lamp as well, causing darkness to descend around them.
“Well, isn’t bland better than awful?” he returned, his eyes following what little of her silhouette he could see in the remaining light produced by the battery heaters that were their only source of heat aside from the blankets and furs inside, and the fire outside.
“By a tiny margin.” she admitted wryly as she began removing the extra layers of her clothing once more. It was true that it was indeed a very cold night, but once she entered her second trimester, what little weight gain she had experienced did make extra layers difficult to sleep in comfortably.
“I’ll call that a victory, if small.” he told her with a smile that couldn’t really be made out in the dark as she continued preparing for the night ahead.
Lili just shook her head over at him before finally moving to join him under the covers, “So, I guess you’re not mad at me anymore?” she finally dared to ask once she was under those covers and bravely wrapped her arms around his waist in the darkness of the shack.
“When was I mad at you?” he asked with narrowed eyes, his breath still managing to catch a bit as she wrapped herself around him under those covers for the first time in months.
“Well, you didn’t exactly seem happy this morning, once I told you about….all the things I was afraid of.” she decided on, rather than reiterating them all once more.
“Of course I don’t like seeing you scared, but that doesn’t mean I’m mad, just worried for you, and the way you are obviously feeling.” he offered softly as he allowed himself to wrap his arms around her as well, swallowing a bit as he felt her bare skin against him once more.
“Then make me feel better.” she whispered back as she tilted her head to place another gentle kiss over his cheek as they now lay close together wrapped in each others arms once more.
“I assume you don’t mean in my capacity as a doctor, this time?” he replied, a slight smile curling his lips, despite all his other worries at that moment.
Lili just shook her head up at him again and moved her hands to pull his t-shirt upwards under the covers. It was then only another moment before she had removed his shirt completely and was already making her way towards his jeans as well.
“You sure?” he asked a little hoarsely.
“When have I ever not been sure, with you?” she whispered back, though words were soon forgotten by both of them as she easily freed him from the rest of his clothing as well.
After several long, passionate moments, Jared easily brought her to her climax as he always did. Of course, feeling her experience such pleasure always triggered his own final moment. However, for the first time since their arrival on that planet, he actually didn’t have to worry about trying to hold back, and trying to remove himself from her before his own pleasure did overtake him. These facts, of course, only made his own orgasm that much more intense as he poured himself into her again, for once not having to try and stop himself, just like it had been that first worry-free time they had been together back on the ship, all those long, long months ago.
His first thought as the orgasm ended was how hard it was going to be to go back to all those worries again, and having to be so careful, again, after the baby came, and how much more difficult that would be after letting himself give into that pleasure while still inside her once more. Though, that thought was soon cut short as he was once again deluded with those intense images flooding his brain, as another vision began playing itself like a movie in his mind once more as he laid there above her, inside her.
Though his orgasm had ended, Jared’s entire body tensed and his breath came in even shorter, more ragged intervals as he shut his eyes painfully above her, images she had no way of seeing now playing once again through his own head.
“Jared?” she asked worriedly, her own breath still ragged from the pleasure he had given her only moments earlier, “Jared?” she repeated more loudly as she squeezed his shoulders tightly above her, the obvious tension that overtook him even more painfully obvious to her at that particular moment, all things considered.
It was several more terrifying moments of her calling his name before that vision finally passed out of his mind once again. As the vision finally departed, it left him to collapse exhaustedly against her, their bodies still entwined together, despite him seeming to have been in a completely different place entirely for several long, scary moments.
“Jared?” she whispered tearfully as he lay above her, the tension finally leaving his body as he squeezed her tightly beneath him, where she now still had one hand clasped worriedly over his bare, damp shoulder and shakily moved the other to push away a sweat-dampened lock from his eyes as he slowly opened them.
“Sorry.” he whispered, his voice barely forming the word.
“Sorry?” she asked as she shook her head up at him in the dark, “For what?” she asked with an odd combination of a stifled sob and a nervous, breathless laugh.
“I know they’re scary for me, can’t imagine how scary they must be for you, especially…at this particular moment.” he finally decided on, his own breath still short.
“A vision?”
“Yeah, a vision.” he swallowed hard as he awkwardly forced himself to move off of her, and to a place on his back, where he once again tried to catch his breath as he too wiped damp locks of brown from his eyes.
“You’re apologizing for having a vision?” she repeated with a tiny smile as she rolled to her side to look down at him despite the darkness surrounding them.
“For scaring you.” he managed as he gently reached up to move one of her own locks from her face.
“I’m scared all the time, and it’s usually never your fault. I think you get a free pass, considering the visions aren’t exactly voluntary, anyway.” she assured as she gently leaned in to kiss his cheek, “Besides, we’ve been hoping and hoping you would get another one, so don’t apologize now that you finally have.” she scolded him, though gently.
“I just don’t like scaring you.” he repeated more quietly.
“I forgive you. Now tell me, what did you see this time?” she dared, her own voice still a little breathless due to more factors than one.
“Didn’t you once tell me you never wanted to know about another vision?” he couldn’t help calling her on that day.
“A girl’s not allowed to change her mind?” she retorted with a slight impatience reflected in her narrowed eyes.
“Just checking.” he smiled.
“Well, was it a good vision or a bad vision?” Lili asked as she swallowed hard.
“I’m smiling aren’t I?”
“It’s too dark to tell.” she scolded again.
“I promise, I am.”
“Then tell me already.” she complained weakly.
“I’m not sure you’d even believe me, all things considered.”