Songfic written for
inusongficsPrompt: Nightmare
Song: Beautiful Nightmare by Beyonce
Pairing: Inu/Kags
Warnings: Graphic scene
Every night I rush to my bed
With hopes that maybe I`ll get a chance to see you when
I close my eyes,
I'm goin’ out of my head
Lost in a fairytale
Can you hold my hand and be my guide
Clouds filled with stars cover your skies
And I hope it rains
You’re the perfect lullaby
What kind of dream is this?
When she found herself forced to take an extended vacation of sorts in her own time for whatever reason, she couldn’t help but constantly think about everything she was missing in a the time she had left behind. She knew it should have felt strange to her for dreaming of a land to which she didn’t belong instead of longing for her real home, but for some reason it wasn’t, at least not to her.
There had been times when she had tried to fool herself into thinking that she was only worried for her new-found friend’s safety. The feudal era was not exactly the safest of places even on a good day and there were more than few people out there that would have ended their lives gladly. She worried that without her they would miss a shard and it would fall into the wrong hands. She worried that demons had attacked them for no reason other than they happened to be there.
She worried that when she finally had finished up whatever business it had been to drag her back into her own time that there would be no one left waiting for her on the other side of the well.
But all those worries weren’t what really haunted her every thought when she was forced to be away from them. They were the fears she told her mother about. They were the fears that she used to entertain her brother when he would beg for her to tell him tales of a land in which magic was very much alive and well. They were the fears that she tried to convince herself of before her head hit the pillow at night, but they were nothing more than well-maintained smokescreens for the instant she slipped away into unconsciousness there was only face she was seeing.
There was only one person she reached out for.
In her dreams he would be smiling as he waited for her. She would stick her head out over the rough wooden edges of the well and he would be there across the clearing watching calmly as she pulled herself up and over the lip of the well. He would watch as she brushed off her green skirt in an effort to dislodge the dirt and weeds that never failed to collect there from her ascent into his time.
The sun was always shining in these dreams. There were always birds chirping out beautiful songs, and more often than not there was a cool breeze blowing between them. She knew because his hair would catch the sun’s gentle rays when the wind blew it back from his perfect golden eyes.
He would never say a word, which should have been the first clue that this was a dream. He was never one not to have an opinion about anything and everything from the weather to her test to the state of the world. But here in her own little world he never spoke except to tell her how much he cherished her; how much he loved her.
So, not speaking, he would reach a hand out to her and she would step forward to take it, and here was where the dream could go one of two ways. Either she would be able to reach him and she would take his hand in hers, his rough battle hardened hands fitting perfectly against her softer ones, or she would miss and the dream would take a turn for the worse.
Tonight, it seemed, was going to take a turn for the worse…
It can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Either way I
Don’t wanna wake up from you
Sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Somebody pinch me
Your love's too good to be true.
Instead of the satisfaction of their hands connecting and him pulling her away into a world in which nothing could ever go wrong, her hand hit nothing but air and she stumbled forward in an attempt to catch her balance. Scowling to herself she straightened to find that he now had his back turned to her. In the back of her mind she knew why and dreaded the moment when he would turn around and she would be faced with the one thing that never failed to strike fear into her heart, but when she was in the dream all she ever felt was annoyance. He was supposed to catch her when she fell and here he was staring off into the distance as though she didn’t exist.
The wind picked up now and the sky began to turn dark with a tinge of red around the edges, and with her hair whipping around her face, and her vision partially obscured she could still make out his hunched figure in the distance. The brilliant red of his trademark robes flared in the fresh onslaught from the heavens and his silver hair flew out to form a haunting silhouette against the blood red clouds that were gathering overhead.
She felt something wet drip down from her chin and she realized that she was crying. The wild strands of her hair began to stick to her face as they became dampened by her tears and by the beginning of a rainstorm that had popped up seemingly from nowhere. Trying to get a hold of herself and her panicked emotions, she called out for him, praying that he would rush to her side and hold her tightly.
Praying that he would tell her everything was going to be okay even though she knew it wasn’t. How could it be when even nature was acting so vicious?
His ears perked up and his head tilted in a way reminiscent of a dog catching the scent of a rabbit in the brush. She wanted so badly to cringe away in fear and revulsion because she knew what she was going to be faced with as soon as he turned around, but she wouldn’t allow herself the luxury of being afraid. Squaring her shoulders against the pounding rains she stood up straight and faced him fully, prepared for what was going to happen once he turned around and saw her. She had known from the beginning that loving him was foolish, and, more importantly dangerous, but that hadn’t stopped her. She had known that there were going to be times when the pleasant dreams they shared turned dark and the nightmares crept up from the bottoms of their souls.
She had known all of this and she hadn’t run away then, so she sure as hell wasn’t turning away now.
Her gasp was caught in the back of her throat as he turned slowly to finally face her, the jagged lines of purple stood out on his pale cheeks and his golden eyes were transformed into the same blood red of the sky around them. His mouth was pulled up in a grisly imitation of a smile and the elongated fangs bushed against his lips, tearing small holes in his lips with every low snarl.
Raising a hand, she whipped away the rainwater and tears from her eyes as she stood face to face with both of their worst nightmares. She knew that in this form all he saw was a weak, little human ripe for the picking. He couldn’t distinguish friend from foe. All he cared about was the next victim, the next rung on the ladder to being strong, and in this form he didn’t care about who he stepped on to get there.
She knew that she should be afraid. His claws were as hard as steel and she had seen him rip clean through the bodies of countless demon as though they were nothing more than damp tissue, but the fear that had almost knocked her off her when the sky had begun to change and she understood what she was going to have to see had completely left her. It was impossible to look into his torment face and not see the man she had fallen in love with screaming through the growls. He was begging with her to run. He was begging with her to leave him be to face his destiny alone, but she would never do that. She could never do that to him.
She took a step forward.
He raised his head in confusion, the demon inside of him not knowing what to do with this prey who was so stupidly approaching the hunter’s den. All he knew was the thrill of the chase and the pure joy that came from proving his strength in contests in which the only options were victory or death. He puffed out his chest and let loose what could only have been described as a low roar. He was warning her that she didn’t stand a chance. He was telling her to run away so that he could play his game of cat and mouse.
She took a step forward.
He was in there somewhere, the man she had fallen in low with. He might not be aware of what his body was doing as his more base instincts were now at the forefront, but she knew he was there. She knew that when push came to shove, he still loved her and would rather claw his own eyes out than hurt her. All she had to do was to stand strong and everything was going to go back to normal. He was smile at her and the smile would reach his glorious golden eyes and the sun would come back out and the birds would sing again and everything would be as it should be. All she had to do was weather this one little storm and she could be happy again.
She took a step forward…
And the dream ended as she watched her own blood splash up into the night sky to land on his face and to stain his claws…
She woke up crying.
I mention you when I say my prayers
I wrap you around all of my thoughts
Boy you are my temporary high
I wish when I wake up you're there
So wrap your arms around me for real
And tell me you'll stay by my side
Clouds filled with stars cover your skies
And I hope it rains
You’re the perfect lullaby
What kind of dream is this?
She drifted off to sleep the next night once again thinking of him. There was a part of her that knew she should probably have some kind of hesitation before giving in to the realm of slumber. She’d had a nightmare the night before, after all, but she wasn’t afraid. Even seeing that bloodthirsty side of him and even hearing his joyous cackles as her body had slumped to the ground, the cold that only comes with death sinking into her bones, she still wanted to see him more than anything.
It was only a dream after all. It wasn’t real.
Tonight it started out the same way it always did. She pulled herself up over the lip of the well and he was standing there waiting for her, but there was something different about the proceedings this time. She looked around her expecting to see the sun’s rays playfully bouncing through the woods, but all she saw was the glittering of the stars above her. In the place of the bird’s song there was now a melody of night noises. Crickets chirped off in the distance and the sounds of raccoons digging through the underbrush in search of their next meal could be heard off to her left. Somewhere behind her an owl hooted and took flight.
She looked up at the sky and was struck as she always was by the number and brightness of the stars. It was one thing to know they were up there and never see them. The lights of Tokyo in her era made it impossible to see more than maybe a flash or two of the night sky, but out here before fluorescents had been invented, before headlights and stadium lights, before the flashing neon of the city erased the night sky for good, humans and demons alike had been able to look up at the sky and see the stars shining steadily down on them.
But there was something missing from her perfect night scene. Where the moon should have been there was nothing more than a thin outline and her heart sank. This was not the dream she had wanted either, but there was no turning back now. He was here and that was all that mattered. Whatever her subconscious was trying to tell her could wait.
Now she looked at him fully, taking in the raven locks where there should have been silver. His eyes were a dull, murky brown and he was frowning as he always was when nights like these came around. She would do anything to put a smile on his face most days, but nights like this were different. There was always a tension in the air that wouldn’t go away no matter how hard she tried, and she understood this side of him as well.
Growing up in a world where you had to be stronger than the people around you or you might not live to see the next dawn, reducing him to such a base form was nothing short of an insult. He couldn’t see that nights like these actually made him stronger. Every time he was faced with a new moon and lived to see the sun reaching her light over the tree line he took another step to becoming that perfect creature he was trying desperately to be, but that didn’t mean he understood.
She sighed heavily as she began to walk towards him, not noticing the shadow that followed behind her until it was too late. It was funny the way dreams worked. She knew she was dead before seeing the blood. She knew she was about to fall forward before she even stopped breathing. She didn’t even have to look down to see the knife sticking out of her chest for the world to see as his eyes welled up with unshed tears and he screamed his grief to the uncaring heavens.
He couldn’t save her, not when he was like this. For a minute she even wondered why she was having his nightmare and not her own. This was his fear, not hers. And as she thought that, she knew she was wrong. This was just as much her own nightmare as it was his.
Because seeing him helpless like this was the worst pain of all.
She woke up crying.
It can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Either way I
Don’t wanna wake up from you.
Sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare.
Somebody pinch me.
You`re love's too good to be true.
My guilty pleasure I ain’t goin’ nowhere
Baby, long as you're here
I’ll be floating on air
Cause you’re my ( sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare )
Either way I
Don’t wanna wake up from you
She somehow managed to drag herself through the next day. School was the same as it always was. There were people there that she was supposed to interact with. Teachers handed out assignments and tutored her on the things she had missed while she had been away with her most recent illness. Her friends were there to give her cards and candy. Hojo showed up to give a pack of vitamins. Life went on out here just as did in that other time.
But she was walking around in a daze, neither in her world nor in that other one. Someday her journey would come to an end and she would find herself back here with her friends and family and she didn’t know what was going happen to her when that day came, but she did know what was going to be expected. She was going to have to go back to her life as though she had never left it. She was going to have to take entrance exams and she was going to go to parties with girls she’d never met before. She was going to be hit on by boys and her heart was going to bleed like an open wound because he couldn’t come with her.
She knew why she was having nightmares when she was back here. She knew what the back of her mind was trying to tell her, but she didn’t want to listen. Her mind was telling her that there was going to come a time when she was going to have to go back to being normal and he wasn’t going to be able to be with her when that time came.
None of that mattered though. She was going back to the feudal era today. Her three days was up and she was going to once again pull on that bright yellow backpack and return to the world that was now more home to her than her own home. She was going to go back to sleeping under the stars instead of in her warm and comforting bed. She was going to leave her friends and their concerns about boys and homework and upcoming exams and plunge herself back into a world where the nightmares everyone else had still lived.
And the nightmare would end and the sweet dreams would begin anew and she would be happy for however long it took for their current journey to end.
For however long it took until she had to come back here and remember her reality all over again.
Tattoo your name across my heart
So it will remain
Not even death can make us part
What kind of dream is this?
He was waiting for her when she stuck her head up out of the well. The sun was shining and the birds were chirping. There was a gentle breeze blowing and it lifted his hair away from his face so that she could see his beautiful golden eyes.
She pulled herself up out of the well and he looked at her. Smirking in her general direction he muttered something about her being late again and she smiled. Not a dream then. The real thing.
And then he held his hand for her and this time she was able to make the connection. He pulled her close and she could smell his familiar scent, like dirt and flowers and sweat. He whispered in her ear that he had missed and she believed him, and then he released her and they went back to the village where their friends were waiting patiently so they could take the next step in their collective journey.
She loved him for who he was. She loved the demon within even though it scared her. She loved the human that thought it was weak.
But most of she loved him just like this, not a part of either world and yet so very precious to her none the less.
She woke up smiling.
It can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare…