[Fic] mistletoe
Fandom: James Bond
Characters: James Bond, Eve Moneypenny, Q, Mallory!M
Pairing: Mallory/Q
Rating: G
Warnings: None.
Word count: c.600
Disclaimer: Characters are not mine.
***
The Q branch is entirely at fault for the sudden outbreak of mistletoe in the MI6 building, Bond is sure of it. It can't be a coincidence that when Bond left for a mission, only a short one lasting two days, the building was fine, and then when he returned, the stuff was everywhere.
It takes twice as long to get through the building because of the people who are constantly stepping into his path and kissing him. Bond keeps catching glimpses of the Q branch graduates who dart away as soon as he looks in their direction, but can't muffle their giggles. At one point, he's almost certain that one of the cameras in the hallway where Alex from accounting ambushes him actually follows him, and he glares directly into the lens once Alex is gone. The camera slowly moves from side to side. Insolent.
Bond's been kissed six times before he even gets to the second floor. By the time he's outside M's office, a grand total of twenty-three people have laid one on him, and a few of them have even shown up for seconds. When Bond says that the mistletoe is everywhere, he means everywhere, and he's pretty sure that some of them are actually carrying it around with them.
He tries to imagine the staff of Q branch staying late after work to hang the mistletoe in every possible place they could think of. Sadly, it's not that difficult.
"I'm not kissing you," Eve says as soon as Bond steps into the room.
"Good," Bond replies gruffly. "I've had enough of that already."
Eve is smirking. "Go on in, he's waiting."
"Well, I got held up."
"I'm sure you did." Eve waves a hand at him, but she's barely containing her laughs now. Of course, she was probably in on the whole thing too.
Bond can't help but to glance around to make sure that there's none of the green stuff hanging above the doorway or in any other nooks and crannies anywhere else in the room to surprise him.
"Don't worry," M says dryly, "I'm not going to kiss you." They go through the report, and thankfully, M doesn't pull anything on him. Just as he's leaving, Q comes through and grins cheerfully at Bond when he glowers at him.
"Oh, and 007?" M calls. He indicates his mouth. "You've got some...lipstick. Right there."
"You are evil," Q exclaims, delighted, as Bond leaves, furiously wiping at his mouth, and Eve's laughter floats through the doorway until Q pushes it shut behind him.
M smirks. "Well, I couldn't let you have all the fun. Your little endeavour was successful, I take it."
"Twenty-three people," Q announces happily, walking over to perch on the edge of M's desk. "That girl from the front desk even managed to beat him to the fourth floor and get another one. We made a chart. It's very impressive."
"It is rather impressive how you managed to hang all that mistletoe up in one night," M says. "Though I did notice that there's none in here."
"Well, I didn't want anyone taking advantage of what's mine." Q grins wickedly and draws a sprig out of his pocket. "But now that I am here..."
"Get over here," M growls playfully, and Q is more than happy to oblige, but he's barely got M's mouth on his when Eve shouts at them from the next room.
"You have a meeting with the Prime Minister in half an hour, make sure you're decent by then!"
Q groans. "How does she always know?"
M just laughs against his lips.
Characters: James Bond, Eve Moneypenny, Q, Mallory!M
Pairing: Mallory/Q
Rating: G
Warnings: None.
Word count: c.600
Disclaimer: Characters are not mine.
***
The Q branch is entirely at fault for the sudden outbreak of mistletoe in the MI6 building, Bond is sure of it. It can't be a coincidence that when Bond left for a mission, only a short one lasting two days, the building was fine, and then when he returned, the stuff was everywhere.
It takes twice as long to get through the building because of the people who are constantly stepping into his path and kissing him. Bond keeps catching glimpses of the Q branch graduates who dart away as soon as he looks in their direction, but can't muffle their giggles. At one point, he's almost certain that one of the cameras in the hallway where Alex from accounting ambushes him actually follows him, and he glares directly into the lens once Alex is gone. The camera slowly moves from side to side. Insolent.
Bond's been kissed six times before he even gets to the second floor. By the time he's outside M's office, a grand total of twenty-three people have laid one on him, and a few of them have even shown up for seconds. When Bond says that the mistletoe is everywhere, he means everywhere, and he's pretty sure that some of them are actually carrying it around with them.
He tries to imagine the staff of Q branch staying late after work to hang the mistletoe in every possible place they could think of. Sadly, it's not that difficult.
"I'm not kissing you," Eve says as soon as Bond steps into the room.
"Good," Bond replies gruffly. "I've had enough of that already."
Eve is smirking. "Go on in, he's waiting."
"Well, I got held up."
"I'm sure you did." Eve waves a hand at him, but she's barely containing her laughs now. Of course, she was probably in on the whole thing too.
Bond can't help but to glance around to make sure that there's none of the green stuff hanging above the doorway or in any other nooks and crannies anywhere else in the room to surprise him.
"Don't worry," M says dryly, "I'm not going to kiss you." They go through the report, and thankfully, M doesn't pull anything on him. Just as he's leaving, Q comes through and grins cheerfully at Bond when he glowers at him.
"Oh, and 007?" M calls. He indicates his mouth. "You've got some...lipstick. Right there."
"You are evil," Q exclaims, delighted, as Bond leaves, furiously wiping at his mouth, and Eve's laughter floats through the doorway until Q pushes it shut behind him.
M smirks. "Well, I couldn't let you have all the fun. Your little endeavour was successful, I take it."
"Twenty-three people," Q announces happily, walking over to perch on the edge of M's desk. "That girl from the front desk even managed to beat him to the fourth floor and get another one. We made a chart. It's very impressive."
"It is rather impressive how you managed to hang all that mistletoe up in one night," M says. "Though I did notice that there's none in here."
"Well, I didn't want anyone taking advantage of what's mine." Q grins wickedly and draws a sprig out of his pocket. "But now that I am here..."
"Get over here," M growls playfully, and Q is more than happy to oblige, but he's barely got M's mouth on his when Eve shouts at them from the next room.
"You have a meeting with the Prime Minister in half an hour, make sure you're decent by then!"
Q groans. "How does she always know?"
M just laughs against his lips.