[Dale - post opposite!plot]

[jdick]

"Holy shit."

Opening his eyes and staring up at the ceiling, Joe didn't need to take a moment to wake up or think about the past few days. In an instant, he remembered everything he'd done, everything he'd made Dale do and every single flower chain he'd draped over his wedding guests.

Fucking wedding guests.Lying flat on his back in the bed, the

Comments

[dale_cooper_fbi]

Dale gave himself a few moments for the memories to catch up with him. It didn't take that long.

"Twice," he said finally, "if I recall correctly, and I'm fairly certain that I do."

[jdick]

"Oh, yeah," Joe said, rubbing his hands over his face. "You recall correctly. If you recall even more correctly, I was the one pushing for two weddings so that we'd be right in the eyes of God."

He remembered using those exact words at least sixty times. "Jesus."

[dale_cooper_fbi]

"Yes, well, not to diminish what we have, but I agreed to marry you because I wanted to have intercourse with you, Joe," admitted Dale. "We weren't entirely ourselves, were we?"

[jdick]

Joe couldn't help his muffled snort of laughter from behind his hands. The whole thing was so fucking absurd. "No, we weren't even close," he agreed, dropping his hands before he looked over at Dale in amusement. "Well, this is kinda fucked. Now what?"