Prompt 4: One day you’re in and the next you’re out - Team AU
Title: Camp Janīzu
Rating: R
Pairing: Nakamaru Yuichi/???, hints of other things, but that's entirely up to you.
Summary: Camp Janīzu starts every summer in July welcoming over two hundred boys between the ages of 13 and 17. It is a chaotic place supervised by a mysterious Camp Head named Arashi-san and home to various categories of insanity. This year, Arashi-san is looking for transfers to their sister camp, Kanjanīzu. Nakamaru Yuichi, a man of many anxieties, is one of six counsellors trying to find order where order does not exist. Featuring all things anxiety-inducing, scary!Ueda, Xanax abuse, NEWS member appearances, slow and painful emotional torture, and perhaps the eyes of a dead aquatic animal.
Prompt: "One day you're in, and the next you're out"
Nakamaru Yuichi was officially neurotic.
He had always thought of himself as the archetypal fun-loving guy though. He made jokes where they were necessary, he did actually enjoy playing pranks, and he was perfectly capable of laughing at himself. It was just that this particular summer was dragging new sides out of him, sides he wasn’t all that proud of; irrationally angry, anxious, shrill, hypertensive, nail-biting, and tearing-at-his-hair sides.
Just to name a few.
It may simply have been because his former team-mate and co-counsellor Koyama Keichiro supposedly “graduated” from the secretly fun little exasperations they shared over the yearly foibles at Camp Janīzu. His excuse being that he’d been offered a job running a business along with some trust fund kid named Shigeaki, which was perfectly unfair as Maru had often felt that he and Kei-chan made possibly the best team.
“I just won’t have the time to be chasing thirteen year olds around a lake every year anymore, Yuu-kun.” Kei-chan’s distant, but gentle tone buzzed through his phone’s receiver. “Anyhow, you and I’ve both been there way too long. Where did you think we were going with it?”
“Well, yeah...but...it was fun...w-wasn’t it?” He hadn’t quite built the emotional backing to say it all outright.
“Fun is fun, Yuu-kun, but we’ve gotta grow up now.”
“Wait just a sec! Just because we work with kids doesn’t make us childish… and what about our-” He didn’t know what would possess him to want to say a filthy word like “relationship”.
“Ah! I should let you go; you have to get back, don’t you...”
It’s why they were such a good team. Kei-chan knew exactly what thing, now seemingly without meaning, Maru had been about to bring up.
Another big contributor could be that Koyama’s replacement turned out to be the ever-grinning fool of a newbie, Taguchi Junnosuke, who very much insisted on ignoring Maru’s politely-placed suggestions and senpai influence.
Taguchi’s first stunt consisted of stripping down to boxers, mounting the pier, and leaping off from an alarming height into the lake, smoothly emerging fish-like amidst the applause of several naive twelve year old Juniors. As Maru yelped in horror at the sight of someone, anyone, having flown off into the water, he realised that he was about to have an awful summer.
“Look, I just don’t think it’s safe...t-to teach the younger ones to leap off the pier like that...”
He was immediately gifted with a very flippant and princely brush of fingers through equally-offensive, wet, bleach-blonde hair. “I’ve memorised the hand-book, Nakamaru-kun, and I’m always good at what I do.” His remarkably irritating toothy grin burned the moisture off Maru’s eyes, inhibiting him from staring the other man down. Taguchi strode off, sentencing Maru to an hour of coaxing numerous excitable pre-teens away (he refused to get too close) from the pier’s horribly frightening edge.
“Plus… he’s been saying English pick-up lines in his sleep…”
“Yeah,” Co-counsellor Akanishi Jin remarked absently in the general direction of Maru’s woeful gaze, building what looked like a leaning fort out of junior-sized lifejackets. (It was an activity best left unexplained) “He’s a freak. I went to high school with him.”
“I’ll switch partners with you...or...” Maru muttered offhandedly at Akanishi’s occupied figure, feeling the oncoming constructs of his own stress-related disease, but secretly hoping that Jin himself would be his teammate this year. “If I have to hear ‘sharu wee dansu’ at three am in the morning ever again…I mean, you and yours are the only ones who’ve had the same teammate for three years now”
Jin whirled around; his innocently round dark eyes steady and burning as if the very suggestion had been a physical blow.
So the subject was dropped, and prior experience kept Maru from moving on to bother the testosterone-happy Ueda/Koki team for a switch as well.
He merely watched Jin crawl into his makeshift fort, shaking his head in vague wonderment.
And this all had to be the one year where Arashi-san was considering transfers to their sister camp Kanjanīzu.
This meant that among the remaining counsellors at Camp Janizu, there was no telling who would make it through the summer before having to pack his bags for northern exploits. It was all very frightening for Maru, who had sat through horror stories about their sister camp. He was a hundred percent certain he’d once heard the phrase unexpected and unwanted orgies around two a.m. initiated by a once innocent game of strip jenga uttered. He’d also heard about the one they called Hina, who was bigger than the rest and had a tendency to deliver brain-damaging blows upon maniacal whim.
“There’s a Maru over there too, you know,” Jin had remarked on some such day. “He’s… a funny one, but that’s nothing compared to the one who walks around in gold hot pants…”
Leaving it at that was all Maru needed in order to come to the decision that if transfers were to be made, his name would not so much as touch that list.
Because for all of the other counsellors’ outside prospects in music, mountain-climbing, athletics, and executive positions, Maru felt he had absolutely nothing else going on besides this camp. He’d be graduating from university within the coming Fall, and the only place that had been a constant for him was Camp Janīzu. Home was a nightmare with his dad expecting a milestone’s worth of achievements and his younger sisters achieving them. If he could only just stay, maybe something about life and purpose would start to make sense.
The biggest problem was that so far as this year was concerned, with Taguchi as a partner, he wouldn’t be able to go anywhere near Arashi-san without being put up for review. Point in fact, he’d been nothing but avoiding the thought since he’d learned that Kei-chan wasn’t coming back. It all made his chest hurt.
And yet for all of Nakamaru’s silent despairs, he was pretty much certain that it had to be the kids themselves that really set it all off. Of course, being one of the senior camp counsellors, he was expecting the stresses that came in the package. The snotty-nosed kids from last year were back with brand new candy-fuelled bags of juvenile horror. And sometimes they were just awful.
However, out of a count of six counsellors, they wouldn’t bully Akanishi, since it was principally unacceptable to go after a man whose very presence just screamed gentle Alpha male. As for Kamenashi, he was generally such a big ball of human tension even when he was sleeping that sure, one could bully him, but there just wasn’t anything funny about shrill lectures nor hours of watching a grown man shed medicated tears. As for Koki, he’d tackle anyone who so much as looked him in the eye a little more than thirty seconds.
From a teen’s perspective, aside from Nakamaru, the one who seemed easiest to get to was Ueda.
However, two years back, Maru had witnessed first hand, a gang of ten infants from the HeySay! cabin mixed sugar and water before painting the concoction over the floorboards beneath the “girly-looking” Counsellor Ueda’s bed, knowing it would attract a varied plethora of insect-induced hilarity.
At the time, Maru had laughed at the thought of Ueda Tatsuya, who had always been just a bit too quiet, flailing around over beetles and ants in his bed. As sensible as it would’ve been to put a stop to the operation, he had let it go.
Not more than a day later, he caught sight of those very same kids emerging from behind the kitchen hall, their faces chalk-white; a few of them were visibly trembling. Seconds after them Ueda strolled out, barefoot and as serene-looking as ever. According to subsequent gossip the aforementioned “girly-looking” counsellor had become immediately and mysteriously aware of the ones responsible. Maru spent the remainder of that summer avoiding Ueda. Relative curiosity aside, he just didn’t want to know.
Of course, Maru should’ve known that now that those kids had found the counsellors they couldn’t touch, they’d definitely come after him the following year.
At first, it was all stuff he could deal with. His whistle went missing; he wasn’t in charge of sports so when he needed to gather the Juniors, he had only to whistle through his fingers. His cabin door, which once had his name specially painted in the Janīzu colours of bottle green and yellow gold, acquired a white store-bought sticker with the words, “Hello, my name is: NakamUra Yuuji” scrawled in romaji. When he tried to peel the sticker off, which turned out to have been placed there using industrial glue, he’d been left with a wooden nameplate covered with strips of torn white paper. It was fine; it was just a wooden nameplate.
There was also the one night he found his pyjamas folded neatly on his pillow all the buttons stitched on the inside…
All of these he could take in stride after some calming mental exercises and reading. After all, he’d been the one to teach them how to sew.
He might even have thought Taguchi would be a prime target for this kind of thing, but the Juniors seemed to consider him an idol with his inappropriately timed back flips (who would do such a thing in the shower room?) and his contagiously loud, sunshine-filled laughter.
But then there was the Kuroyanagi Tetsuko wig left where he normally kept his hairbrush.
And he’d probably be lying if he said that it hadn’t shaken him a little when someone had meticulously managed to statically-charge all the rug area surrounding his bed.
By the second week, it was only natural that he began to experience some hypertension as their efforts started to get a little too detailed.
Jin’s sport-drink nearly capsized as he doubled over with his surprisingly boy-like giggle. “Is it even possible to remove all the salt in miso?!” he gasped.
Maru only gestured for Jin to take a taste for himself, coughing helplessly into his napkin. The kitchen hall’s buzz of boy chatter never once skipped a beat during his choking episode and Nakamaru thought of the dangers of lost youth as he took several gulps of water.
“You really never know what these kids are capable of,” he heard Ueda murmur from across the table, which was just typical.
When he’d purged his mouth of the awful salt-less soy taste, he chose to refrain from explaining the resin formulas one could use to replace sodium with potassium in hard water extending to the sodium content of even ocean water as none of them much cared for anything he’d picked up from uni. Also, it would mean admitting to himself that he’d just gulped down some form of resin.
Koki reached around Ueda and grabbed the bowl, taking a quick sip. His nose scrunched up and he wordlessly set the bowl back down, scowling at Maru.
“Tastes like shit.”
Kamenashi made a sharp noise and shot a quelling stare across the table. Koki ignored him.
“I didn’t ask you to taste it!” Nakamaru snapped balefully. “Why is it only mine?”
“It must’ve been when I put the bowls out. I guard the kitchen like a hawk; no one touches anything in there without my permission,” Kamenashi said a little, in Maru’s opinion, defensively.
“Anyway, your partner’s eating with the Hey!Says again.” Jin nodded abruptly toward Taguchi’s platinum head on the other end of the hall. “Ueda and Koki are in charge of those this year, you know.”
“That’s not allowed! Is that allowed? That can’t be allowed!”
Kamenashi was clearly overdue for his pill.
“Leave him be. Arashi-san isn’t in today, and that kid’s still comfortable acting like a junior,” Ueda’s tone, as always, docile. He was eyeing Maru. “You OK?”
“Yeah...”
Akanishi shoved a prescription bottle and his cup of water at Kamenashi. Maru glanced a bit enviously at the little white tablets.
“Good,” Ueda continued. “Koki and I are setting up the rope-climbing race for ABC-Z cabin this afternoon, but the Juniors need their swimming hour. You and Taguchi are gonna step in for us since your schedule’s free.”
Maru slumped down against the table. He’d been planning to speak with Arashi-san about the transfer that afternoon. “Would it have killed you to ask if I’m OK with that...?”
Ueda continued to look at Maru unblinkingly. He took a slow bite of his onigiri, chewed thoughtfully, and then swallowed, his expression never-changing. He said nothing. Nakamaru thought vaguely of demon and cyborg cross-breeds.
Kamenashi stood suddenly, unearthed a dish towel and started clearing the table to which where Jin absently pulled him to sit back down again.
“Kisuma cabin is on kitchen duty.”
A lanky, thin arm suddenly slipped by Maru’s head and reached for his plate, long fingers curling around his last onigiri. “Ohoho! Lucky~!” warbled an instantly off-putting nasal voice.
Maru looked up with some resignation to see Taguchi opening his mouth around the rice ball, revealing a glimpse of front teeth sinking deep, loudly chewing with what could only be described as unnecessary enthusiasm. A grain of rice rolled off his lip and stationed itself comfortably on his chin. He kept right on chewing as he grinned winsomely at Maru, nori poking out of the corners of his wide mouth. Maru felt a twisting in his stomach and he knew he was going to be sick by this evening.
Jin occupied himself with his sports drink to hide his renewed laughter, Ueda rested his head on his hand, shaking with silent chuckles, Koki’s face lit up with one of his over-the-top grins, and even Kame’s rare smile curled up as he looked away to hide it.
Maru stood. “We’re playing lifeguard today, so free your schedule,” he cut in gruffly.
Taguchi had his mouth full, the rice grain on his chin bobbing up and down as he chewed. It bothered Maru more than he liked to think about.
“What do you mean you’re not getting in?!”
As Taguchi leaned toward Maru, who was sitting comfortably on his towel, it became clear that the idiot was dripping all over the place, beads of lake water dragging what Maru was sure were icy cool streaks down the other man’s thin, barely-existent pectorals. “It’s more efficient to keep an eye out for any problems when outside the water,” he said tightly, pursing his lips disapprovingly at how brazenly the man could stand shirtless in the bright unflattering sun.
Taguchi straightened, letting the sun expose the obscene pallor of his stomach as he stretched his arms out lazily. He made a vaguely irritating sound of disapproval that sounded halfway between a snort and a gargle. “What kind of camp counsellor doesn’t play with the campers?”
“A responsible one!” Maru snapped, pulling his towel back from the malicious drops of water soaking it.
It was then that Taguchi adopted a quick disarming smile as he stepped back, seemingly giving up. He seemed to move back toward where the towels were hanging and Maru relaxed, curling his knees in and looking out at some of the younger kids moving steadily out of shore.
“Last chance to get in on your own, Yuu-chan.”
He’d twisted around in his spot to ask him just who he thought he was calling Yuu-chan, but turned to experience an unpleasant moment of clarity as he found the other man inches away behind him, hands outstretching. A flash of alarming resolve crossed Taguchi’s features as he slipped two surprisingly strong arms around Maru’s waist and hoisted him up. It quickly became Nakamaru’s most embarrassing struggle to date.
Generally, he flailed, kicked, and shouted in high tones to be put down “immediately, you fuck-faced, sickening excuse for a human being!” Nakamaru was sure he’d said many other such choice words, but they came up breathless as the lanky frame then encircling him tightened its hold. Apparently, Taguchi was made of shock proof rubber or something disgustingly invincible like that as all sharp blows and perhaps some bites here and there didn’t seem to perturb him as he made the run down the pier, his arms full of Maru.
Even as the icy water swallowed them, Taguchi’s arms were like a belt of horridly uncomfortable boniness. But as his bare toes scraped the bottom and the panic set in, Maru was enfolded instantly in a singularity of sounds as Taguchi remained clasped against him. Bubbles floated up as he breathed out air that barely existed and a constant metronome of steady beating, quick sharp raps of rhythm echoed against the inside of his own chest. Lively, excited. Taguchi’s legs kicked them upward, hands reached down and curled into fists against Maru’s shorts, fingers accidentally skimming his thighs, and Maru, as he listened distantly to those steady heartbeat sounds, felt an off-putting tightening in his gut as Taguchi’s bare skin slid along his.
Sunshine flooded around him as he finally opened his mouth to oxygen. It was moments after they’d reached shallow water before he realised he was still clutching the other man for dear life, thus hindering Taguchi from standing up.
“Hoho! Nakamaru-san, get off~! What are you doing?”
Embarrassed and even more irritated than when they started off with, Maru scooted away, still breathing unevenly. For good measure, he aimed a swift kick at the idiot. It landed somewhere on the other man’s left hip.
“Ouch,” Taguchi said simply, still grinning as he scrambled up, swept his wet hair out of his face before waving at the on-looking juniors.
“You... asshole... irritating... I-” He spluttered off into coughs and wondered how much of that foul lake water he’d swallowed. “I can’t fucking swim!”
Taguchi’s mouth became an “O” of surprise, his frame a near silhouette in the afternoon sun. “You’re a camp counsellor...and you can’t swim?!” said silhouette broke out into a long peal of laughter, clapping along to add insult.
It was a dilemma between hitting him again and stalking off for someplace drier. Maru chose the latter. Not only would a fight be against protocol, but he was pretty sure he wouldn’t win.
It was cold and the tension in his middle hadn’t fled. His now torn flip-flops squelched in the dirt, sucking in grainy trails of mud between his toes and chafing his soles. Swallowing back the memory of Taguchi’s wide hands gripping his thighs in the water, he removed his ruined flip-flops as he walked up onto his cabin’s narrow veranda. A horrible truth became clear to him as his hand closed around the doorknob. Taguchi or someone had locked it and, as this was uncommon, Maru didn’t have the key on him. Sighing a little helplessly, he turned on the spot and stared out at the now distant lake. Limping bare-toed back over there to berate his current enemy over such an issue didn’t seem like an appealing prospect. The front window was barred, but if he could just peel the screen off the side window, he could climb in and unlock it then give Taguchi a sound warning about it this evening. Or ideally, get Ueda to do it.
He squelched his way on over to the side of the cabin, wincing as his bare feet slipped muddier against the afternoon shady grass. The screen was easy to pull off as he used his pinky fingernail to twist the lower screws. It was too high, but eventually he had his fingers on the window sill. He took a deep breath before hoisting himself up awkwardly. He barely made it halfway up with one foot skittering against the wooden wall of the cabin.
How he could manage to become anymore uncoordinated was a marvel, and he gasped as in result of his struggle the sharp edge of the sill connected with his chin. Frustration and the subsequent throbbing pain actually made his throat feel heavy and his eyes wet, which was just beyond embarrassing.
Perhaps if he tried a running jump.
He stepped back, hands up and ready.
“What silly and very Nakamaru-like thing are you getting up to?”
Maru lowered his arms and looked over at Ueda, who was leaning out, looking at him through glaring shades from over the cabin’s front porch.
“I… am locked out. I’m just…” He trailed off at the now mocking twist in the other man’s smile.
“Didn’t you have something you were supposed to be doing? You know what? Never mind, I’ll just get the key from Taguchi.
Without a moment’s thought, Ueda hopped over the wooden railing separating them. “That won’t be necessary. I’ll hoist you up.”
Maru didn’t dare suggest that Ueda do it instead, though it was clear that the other man would have little issue making it up and into that window. He held in a breath, standing just under the window as Ueda seized the belt loops at his waist.
“Why are you all wet?”
“Just get me inside, please, Ueda…”
With what seemed little effort, his whole body flew up at a near break-neck speed, barely giving him time to yell as he felt himself thrust through the open window.
It was abrupt and as his knees collided with the hardwood floor, he realised he couldn’t breathe. Something sticky and thin had plastered itself to his face. His head struck the floor as he pawed desperately at whatever it was. Within seconds that felt like a lifetime, he managed to peel off what he then realised was saran wrap soaked in what smelled like sunscreen.
“Ah…” he moaned, looking incredulously at the greasy plastic.
“You OK in there?”
“No…no, ah fuck… I’m not OK.” He looked at the window from where just the very top of Ueda’s roan fringe was visible. Sure enough the window pane was still streaked in sunscreen-coated fingerprints. They must’ve been the very ones who locked the door and knew he’d try the window…which was just too many kinds of insane.
“What happened?” Ueda called. “I’ll come around; just open the door.”
“No…” He scrambled up slowly, trying to ignore the new aches in his knees. “I just want to be alone right now.”
“In my opinion, you may be taking all this a bit too clinically,” came Ueda’s cool remark. “Also, your window’s filthy, did you know?”
Maru didn’t bother with an answer.
Ueda’s footsteps outside died away.
Miserably, Maru peeled off his now just damp clothing, thinking reluctantly of days before. He wanted to blame Koyama for his present state; he wanted to be angry, but it was all so trivial to him. For all complaints, he felt the situation was more self-inflicted than anything else.
Now in a much warmer, drier polo, he sat on the edge of his bed, looking aimlessly at the late afternoon shadows in the enclosed cabin. His eyes drifted over to Taguchi’s side of the room, bed unmade, cedar wall decorated with manga-esque drawings and littered with the same type of comics. He remembered Kei-chan’s bed used to be tidy and smelled always of soap and iced choco.
A little inadvertently, Maru reached for his phone and found himself looking at Kei-chan’s number decisively.
The buzz of ringing on the other end made him feel that it might not have been such a bad idea to phone the other man, if even just to say hello, ask him how he was, ask him what he was doing this summer, ask him to come back.
“Hai, hai!” Kei-chan’s usual phone greeting was abrupt and Maru’s voice stopped working. “…um, hello, Yuu-kun?”
Nakamaru coughed, gripping the phone tightly. “Ah, Koyama-kun… I must’ve dialled your number by mistake. Sorry…”
“Eh…” A thoughtful pause. He heard Kei-chan sigh. “Is everything OK, Nakamaru-kun?”
Maru expelled a nervous breath. “Mm, I’m OK. You?”
“I’m OK. This summer’s been pretty hot, hasn’t it? I hope you’ve been using sunscreen.” Kei-chan laughed. “Remember the time you got that sunburn. We had to spend the whole evening… we got aloe all over the place.”
“Yeah… I remember.” The discomfort, the pain, and Kei-chan’s hesitant fingers. He shut his eyes.
“Since you probably wouldn’t ask anyone else to do it for you, just make sure you’re using the sunscreen.”
“I think I’m getting plenty.” The irony in his tone goes unchecked.
“I’m glad to hear that. How…how is my replacement?”
Maru wanted to hit something. Instead he leaned back to stare coldly at the ceiling. “I should go. I meant to call someone else, and-and didn’t realise…”
“Ah, that’s right. Sorry for keeping you. Take care, Yuu-kun.”
Maru swallowed as he hit the end button, pressing his thumb a little harder than necessary. He then spent a contrite moment thinking he should call back and apologise, but the entire issue had arisen from the fact that Maru felt he couldn’t do this alone. And hearing Kei-chan’s pitying murmurs kilometres away made him realise he needed to stop feeling sorry for himself so much because it made people like Kei-chan sound like that when they spoke to him. He couldn’t take it.
“Don’t you usually spend your free hours reading?”
Akanishi and Kamenashi’s cabin was a sight different from Nakamaru’s and Taguchi’s. For one, it was bigger. Akanishi’s side of the room was tucked in its own alcove separated from the room by a screen stolen from the first aid cabin because, as Jin himself put it, “sometimes privacy, distance, and silence are the answer.” The answer to what, Nakamaru could only guess as he spotted Kame on the other side of the room, arms folded, standing in front of a whiteboard covered in complicated, intricate lines and odd marks.
Jin followed his gaze before motioning for his corner of the room. “It keeps him calm,” he said. “The trick is not to let him know you’re watching.”
“What happens if…”
“Unless you have any interest in made-up physics and a possibly shrill recount of today’s activities, then you’re better off not asking.”
Maru sidled after Jin to sit facing him on his narrow bed. Jin set his guitar on the chair beside him.
“I was actually about to come find you. Ueda stopped by and mentioned you were having some kind of breakdown.”
Maru paused. “If that’s what he wants to call it, that’s fine, but I’d argue that he exaggerates.”
“Yeah, Ueda is a bit of a liar, anyway… but you sure you’re OK?”
“It’s just been a bad day…”
“He said you were soaked and crying on the floor of your cabin with the door locked.”
Maru shifted, trying to get comfortable on Jin’s woolly coverlet. “I wasn’t crying… look, I actually came here because I know you’re good with things like this.”
Jin’s eyebrows raised.
“I want to talk to Arashi-san about this year’s transfer…”
“Don’t tell me you want to go buddy it up with Kanjanīzu-”
“I want them to transfer Taguchi instead of me.” He said it quickly, staring fixedly at his own socks.
Jin gazed at him for a long protracted moment, chocolate brown eyebrows raised. “Now that’s cold.”
Maru rubbed his nose fretfully.
“I mean, you don’t even really know if Arashi-san is considering you for the transfer…”
“Come on, Jin! I’m the filler guy you all post on the duties you don’t want to do. Sewing, arts and crafts, story time. I can’t swim or catch a Frisbee to save my life; I get awkward around kids normally and none of them like me much either. Don’t think I don’t know how useless I am as a camp counsellor!”
“Nakamaru…” His voice was steady, devoid of any hesitation, but Maru pressed on.
“Even though I know this, I want to stay! I want to experience this every summer until you’ve all moved on. I hate the pranks, but you all help make it easier to deal with. I can get over my partner leaving, and I know whomever they send in next can’t be any worse than Taguchi. It sounds selfish and mean, but…I don’t want to leave, and I don’t want any of you to either.”
“I’m touched,” said Jin albeit affably, turning away to reach under his cot. Seconds later he tipped a wide glass bottle of vodka between them. It rolled and bumped against Maru’s socked foot.
Abruptly the curtain on Akanishi’s screen was pushed aside revealing Kamenashi, wide eyed and-- disturbingly enough-- smiling. “Nakamaru’s never joined us for happy hour before.”
“Don’t call it that,” Jin replied tiredly, swinging his legs of the bed and brushing past Kame. “It’s so middle-aged woman.”
Maru stared blankly as Jin returned with three glasses entirely too tall for any serving of vodka.
“Hold on, it’s been three years since we’ve met, and you two never invited me?!”
Kame plopped down on the floor beside the bed, silently accepting his glass.
“Forgive my elitist roommate, please.” Akanishi began pouring. “He made it sound as though we’ve had selective people join us in the past, but it’s just been us two. An activity like this on the sly requires severe confidence.”
“I didn’t mean to say it like that at all,” Kame protested a little grumpily. “Anyway, if we were choosing who to include during happy hour-“
“I told you don’t call it that.”
“-we wouldn’t choose Nakamaru in the first place. He’s way too uptight. I’d have asked Koki… or maybe even Ueda. I hear he’s a lightweight. Imagine how hilarious that’d be.”
Maru frowned at Kame for a short moment. “OK, I know I probably should’ve waited until after a few drinks to say this, but… you…d-don’t…” He hesitated, milliseconds from losing nerve. “You don’t do much to make yourself very likeable.”
Kame pursed his lips.
“You’ll like him better when he’s had a few…” Maru stared at Jin incredulously, but the other man just tipped his head back and took an alarming gulp, swallowing half the glass.
“Anyway,” Maru pressed once he’d distracted himself by swallowing his own burning gulp of vodka. “Don’t tell me this is what you do every night. I mean, I know Ueda and Koki probably spend their evening at the gym in town…”
Kame burst out laughing. “Koki’s way too lazy to spend all that time at the gym. He prefers his art, and Ueda either goes off to visit one of his in-town girlfriends or he’ll bring her back here with him. Shameless stuff, really. Another glass, please, Jin.”
“I’ll probably end up asking how you know that…but not just now,” Jin remarked, then topped off Maru’s glass. “Now back to your crisis…”
“No, we don’t actually need to discuss that anymore,” Nakamaru snapped.
“What? What’s wrong with Nakamaru?” Kame queried.
“He wants Taguchi transferred.”
“What?! I mean, I know he’s sort of weird, but isn’t that a little…”
Maru nearly wailed. “Akanishi! I didn’t tell you this stuff so you could throw the details around. And the way you say it makes me sound like a bastard.”
Jin downed the rest of his drink. “Isn’t that what you said? If I heard wrong let me know because talk like that definitely qualifies as a potential crisis.”
“If things weren’t the way they are, I’d have had one of those long before now,” Kame muttered.
“If things weren’t the way they are, I’d have had one way before you,” Jin returned.
“You having a crisis? What would that be like?”
“Much like yours, only attractive…”
“You idiot, there’s no such thing as an attractive crisis…”
“Well, you wouldn’t know, would you?”
“Asshole.”
“Bitch.”
“Honestly, guys,” said Maru. “I’m not really here for the pep talk or the advice. I can work this out myself; I just need someone to listen to me as I do just that.”
Jin guffawed a little, which in all truth, irritated Maru just as much. “OK, so while you’re working it out: why do you hate Taguchi so much?”
“Oh, good question! I’m curious about that myself!”
Maru was pretty sure you weren’t supposed to mix Xanax with alcohol, but there were just so many things Kamenashi insisted on juggling that it probably didn’t matter.
“It’s not like I hate him…” Maru thought it remarkable that he had already begun slurring.
Jin looked at Maru for a lengthy pause, chewing his lower lip. “Well, if you don’t-“
“You know what your problem is?” Kame cut in abruptly. “You’re a coward. You hate confrontation, so you don’t come out and say it if someone’s bugging you. Jin told me the kids are bullying you. The kids.”
Maru shot Jin what he hoped was a venom-filled look.
“And you don’t even say anything to anyone about it…”
“I just don’t think it would look very responsible if I went running to someone-“
“That’s what your partner’s there for! So if he’s the problem, go talk to him.”
Maru sat, absorbing these words, his eyes wandering about the room and landing for short moment on a poster to his right of a muscular man with eyes that one could liken to a dead sea creature. After downing that much vodka in such a short extension of time, he wondered vaguely whether he was well and truly plastered yet.
“You might be right, but…it’s not as if it’s easy to talk someone out of being annoying… but as useless as I am, I’m not a coward…” With some resolve, he pushed himself up, scrambling a little to get off the bed. If he was going to work up the state of mind to speak with Taguchi honestly without backpedalling then there was no time like the present.
Unfortunately, his legs had something else in mind as his socked feet touched the floor. He stumbled forward, his arms grasping at air and landing smack dab on the upper edge of that poster. Unable to control gravity, Maru’s fingers pulled down as his already injured knee crashed to the floor. The tearing was a resounding harmony to his own yelp of pain and the duet of wails from behind him.
“Yamapi!”
Clutching half the poster in hand, Maru winced and turned to face two identical looks of horror.
“You did not just do that,” Kame remarked decisively.
Jin buried his face in his hands.
Maru had no words.
It was relatively dark for a hot summer night. The only thing lighting his way back was the distant lights from the mess hall and the dim pale glow from the quarter moon. It was such that Maru didn’t spot Taguchi leaning against the porch banister in front of their cabin door until he was a mere metre away.
“Nakamaru-kun?”
“Mm, it’s me.”
The younger man straightened, reaching into his khakis pocket to pull out a can of something. Without even a pause, he offered it up. “Here you go; I was in town during the free hours and I picked up a few.”
Maru walked forward, gazing uneasily at the dark silhouette proffering something in its hand. Beer. After the mini disaster in Jin and Kame’s cabin, he definitely didn’t need to be drinking again. He accepted it all the same and watched as Taguchi leaned back against the banister, his bright hair the only thing glinting in the dying light.
“I have something I want to talk to you about,” Maru finally blurted out, hoping he sounded at the very least sober. He took a seat on the steps in front of the door.
He felt Taguchi’s gaze drift toward him, lingering for the longest time. “Really?” he said finally, cheer drenching his tone.
Maru felt he would lose his nerve too quickly. What was he even planning to say? Could he sit there and list all of Taguchi’s transgressions and expect that that alone should exonerate his own anger. He was apologising as well, which made getting any more upset just plain irrational…
Taguchi blew out a relaxed breath. “Neither of us is very good at this job, are we?”
Nakamaru blinked up at the other man, somehow wishing that even in this dark he might be able to read an expression at the very least.
“But I think that’s why we get put in pairs here. Balance. Kinda nice, isn’t it?”
He had to think about this, which was a new kind of alarming. “Well… I guess.”
A protracted silence followed and Maru could feel himself begin to fidget. In no more than a few seconds the atmosphere was going to get awkward.
“I don’t quite get how both of us being bad at this leads to balance,” he finally murmured thoughtfully.
Taguchi laughed abruptly. “I’m not as bad as you, though.”
“Hey!” Maru responded automatically, which made Taguchi laugh all the more.
Maru watched him laugh for a bit before it dragged a bitter smile from him. “You know, balance and counsellor skills aside, it’s way too easy to feel like I don’t belong here.”
More silence, this time punctuated by a thin breeze brushing through the trees nearby. A little absently, Maru cracked open his can and drank a slow, healthy gulp realising only a second afterward that he’d resolved not to drink anymore tonight.
“Do you mean you want to leave?” Taguchi queried with little inflection.
Maru hesitated, thinking the question was posed at an odd moment. “That’s… just the thing… I don’t.”
His own words seemed to linger in the space between them, and he could feel Taguchi looking at him for the longest space of time. The air was still and there was a night-time sweetness to the heat. Maru leaned back on the heels of his hands, looking out into the dark, bringing the beer can to his lips, sipping nervously.
“Nakamaru-kun, look up at the sky.”
Maru started and blinked over at Taguchi. “Eh?”
Taguchi was leaning forward from under the cover of the porch’s roof, his face tilted up at the deep opacity of the night sky. The faint light from the moon made his usually pale sand skin glow with a blue tone. His hair was white in the shadow. “Look…there… at the moon.”
Doubtfully, Maru raised his head to look. A sliver of yellow stood out in the star-scattered sky. Barely even a quarter of the moon was left, nearly gone. He only registered Taguchi’s movement a second too late as a long-fingered hand covered his.
“Oi, wha…?”
Taguchi’s hand, still holding his, rose high enough at eye-level with the sky. “Stick your thumb out,” he said simply.
Maru, insanely uncomfortable with this proximity, hesitated before slowly repositioning his hand so he was giving a thumbs up to nothing in particular. Taguchi set his knee on one side of Maru and rested his other hand on his shoulder, other fingers curled around the back of Maru’s hand, turning both so that his thumb was pointing sideways. Maru’s eyes were drawn to the glow of the thin moon and how Taguchi moved his thumb until it lined up perfectly in the crescent of yellow above them.
“See how nicely it fits?” Taguchi murmured, his breath feathering against the skin at Maru’s collar.
Maru gazed silently at the strange image before him. His thumb tucked perfectly in that far-off space where a rock floated above; a mere illusion of shadow. Still, he fit. Taguchi remained where he was and Nakamaru felt his nearness at a peculiar intensity. His scent was as deep and heavy as the woods themselves, of fresh young branches leaning heavily into the lake, dragging delicate ripples across its surface, of dewed green in the heated summer, of sunshine over water reflecting the same brightness as the other man’s smile.
“Because you know, whenever I’m somewhere I don’t know if I should be…and when I want to be there no matter what, I do the ‘moon check’. Why wouldn’t I belong where the moon fits so perfectly on the tip of my finger?”
“Moon check?” Maru repeated the English words faintly, trying to dispel the tremor building up his back.
“Yeah.” He was laughing again, a sort of in-his-throat chuckle. Taguchi was genuinely amused about something he had just said. “Cool, isn’t it?”
In truth, cool was the last word Nakamaru would be willing to pin on such affected oblivion to one’s surroundings, but for a reason he couldn’t quite name he felt a lot better; a lot better about everything in general including the fact that Taguchi was still so alarmingly close to him. The younger man let his hand drop with a quiet sigh. Perhaps due to a shallow feeling of intoxication, Maru didn’t think all the much about what he was doing as he turned his head, feeling the side of Taguchi’s blonde hair graze his forehead.
Taguchi squeezed his shoulder firmly before pulling away to stand up. “Ah~ah, rough day, though, wasn’t it? I think I’ll go to bed.”
Even after the door behind him clicked shut, Maru remained on the steps, shivering from a chill that couldn’t possibly exist on such a warm night.
Part Two Here>
Rating: R
Pairing: Nakamaru Yuichi/???, hints of other things, but that's entirely up to you.
Summary: Camp Janīzu starts every summer in July welcoming over two hundred boys between the ages of 13 and 17. It is a chaotic place supervised by a mysterious Camp Head named Arashi-san and home to various categories of insanity. This year, Arashi-san is looking for transfers to their sister camp, Kanjanīzu. Nakamaru Yuichi, a man of many anxieties, is one of six counsellors trying to find order where order does not exist. Featuring all things anxiety-inducing, scary!Ueda, Xanax abuse, NEWS member appearances, slow and painful emotional torture, and perhaps the eyes of a dead aquatic animal.
Prompt: "One day you're in, and the next you're out"
Nakamaru Yuichi was officially neurotic.
He had always thought of himself as the archetypal fun-loving guy though. He made jokes where they were necessary, he did actually enjoy playing pranks, and he was perfectly capable of laughing at himself. It was just that this particular summer was dragging new sides out of him, sides he wasn’t all that proud of; irrationally angry, anxious, shrill, hypertensive, nail-biting, and tearing-at-his-hair sides.
Just to name a few.
It may simply have been because his former team-mate and co-counsellor Koyama Keichiro supposedly “graduated” from the secretly fun little exasperations they shared over the yearly foibles at Camp Janīzu. His excuse being that he’d been offered a job running a business along with some trust fund kid named Shigeaki, which was perfectly unfair as Maru had often felt that he and Kei-chan made possibly the best team.
“I just won’t have the time to be chasing thirteen year olds around a lake every year anymore, Yuu-kun.” Kei-chan’s distant, but gentle tone buzzed through his phone’s receiver. “Anyhow, you and I’ve both been there way too long. Where did you think we were going with it?”
“Well, yeah...but...it was fun...w-wasn’t it?” He hadn’t quite built the emotional backing to say it all outright.
“Fun is fun, Yuu-kun, but we’ve gotta grow up now.”
“Wait just a sec! Just because we work with kids doesn’t make us childish… and what about our-” He didn’t know what would possess him to want to say a filthy word like “relationship”.
“Ah! I should let you go; you have to get back, don’t you...”
It’s why they were such a good team. Kei-chan knew exactly what thing, now seemingly without meaning, Maru had been about to bring up.
Another big contributor could be that Koyama’s replacement turned out to be the ever-grinning fool of a newbie, Taguchi Junnosuke, who very much insisted on ignoring Maru’s politely-placed suggestions and senpai influence.
Taguchi’s first stunt consisted of stripping down to boxers, mounting the pier, and leaping off from an alarming height into the lake, smoothly emerging fish-like amidst the applause of several naive twelve year old Juniors. As Maru yelped in horror at the sight of someone, anyone, having flown off into the water, he realised that he was about to have an awful summer.
“Look, I just don’t think it’s safe...t-to teach the younger ones to leap off the pier like that...”
He was immediately gifted with a very flippant and princely brush of fingers through equally-offensive, wet, bleach-blonde hair. “I’ve memorised the hand-book, Nakamaru-kun, and I’m always good at what I do.” His remarkably irritating toothy grin burned the moisture off Maru’s eyes, inhibiting him from staring the other man down. Taguchi strode off, sentencing Maru to an hour of coaxing numerous excitable pre-teens away (he refused to get too close) from the pier’s horribly frightening edge.
“Plus… he’s been saying English pick-up lines in his sleep…”
“Yeah,” Co-counsellor Akanishi Jin remarked absently in the general direction of Maru’s woeful gaze, building what looked like a leaning fort out of junior-sized lifejackets. (It was an activity best left unexplained) “He’s a freak. I went to high school with him.”
“I’ll switch partners with you...or...” Maru muttered offhandedly at Akanishi’s occupied figure, feeling the oncoming constructs of his own stress-related disease, but secretly hoping that Jin himself would be his teammate this year. “If I have to hear ‘sharu wee dansu’ at three am in the morning ever again…I mean, you and yours are the only ones who’ve had the same teammate for three years now”
Jin whirled around; his innocently round dark eyes steady and burning as if the very suggestion had been a physical blow.
So the subject was dropped, and prior experience kept Maru from moving on to bother the testosterone-happy Ueda/Koki team for a switch as well.
He merely watched Jin crawl into his makeshift fort, shaking his head in vague wonderment.
And this all had to be the one year where Arashi-san was considering transfers to their sister camp Kanjanīzu.
This meant that among the remaining counsellors at Camp Janizu, there was no telling who would make it through the summer before having to pack his bags for northern exploits. It was all very frightening for Maru, who had sat through horror stories about their sister camp. He was a hundred percent certain he’d once heard the phrase unexpected and unwanted orgies around two a.m. initiated by a once innocent game of strip jenga uttered. He’d also heard about the one they called Hina, who was bigger than the rest and had a tendency to deliver brain-damaging blows upon maniacal whim.
“There’s a Maru over there too, you know,” Jin had remarked on some such day. “He’s… a funny one, but that’s nothing compared to the one who walks around in gold hot pants…”
Leaving it at that was all Maru needed in order to come to the decision that if transfers were to be made, his name would not so much as touch that list.
Because for all of the other counsellors’ outside prospects in music, mountain-climbing, athletics, and executive positions, Maru felt he had absolutely nothing else going on besides this camp. He’d be graduating from university within the coming Fall, and the only place that had been a constant for him was Camp Janīzu. Home was a nightmare with his dad expecting a milestone’s worth of achievements and his younger sisters achieving them. If he could only just stay, maybe something about life and purpose would start to make sense.
The biggest problem was that so far as this year was concerned, with Taguchi as a partner, he wouldn’t be able to go anywhere near Arashi-san without being put up for review. Point in fact, he’d been nothing but avoiding the thought since he’d learned that Kei-chan wasn’t coming back. It all made his chest hurt.
And yet for all of Nakamaru’s silent despairs, he was pretty much certain that it had to be the kids themselves that really set it all off. Of course, being one of the senior camp counsellors, he was expecting the stresses that came in the package. The snotty-nosed kids from last year were back with brand new candy-fuelled bags of juvenile horror. And sometimes they were just awful.
However, out of a count of six counsellors, they wouldn’t bully Akanishi, since it was principally unacceptable to go after a man whose very presence just screamed gentle Alpha male. As for Kamenashi, he was generally such a big ball of human tension even when he was sleeping that sure, one could bully him, but there just wasn’t anything funny about shrill lectures nor hours of watching a grown man shed medicated tears. As for Koki, he’d tackle anyone who so much as looked him in the eye a little more than thirty seconds.
From a teen’s perspective, aside from Nakamaru, the one who seemed easiest to get to was Ueda.
However, two years back, Maru had witnessed first hand, a gang of ten infants from the HeySay! cabin mixed sugar and water before painting the concoction over the floorboards beneath the “girly-looking” Counsellor Ueda’s bed, knowing it would attract a varied plethora of insect-induced hilarity.
At the time, Maru had laughed at the thought of Ueda Tatsuya, who had always been just a bit too quiet, flailing around over beetles and ants in his bed. As sensible as it would’ve been to put a stop to the operation, he had let it go.
Not more than a day later, he caught sight of those very same kids emerging from behind the kitchen hall, their faces chalk-white; a few of them were visibly trembling. Seconds after them Ueda strolled out, barefoot and as serene-looking as ever. According to subsequent gossip the aforementioned “girly-looking” counsellor had become immediately and mysteriously aware of the ones responsible. Maru spent the remainder of that summer avoiding Ueda. Relative curiosity aside, he just didn’t want to know.
Of course, Maru should’ve known that now that those kids had found the counsellors they couldn’t touch, they’d definitely come after him the following year.
At first, it was all stuff he could deal with. His whistle went missing; he wasn’t in charge of sports so when he needed to gather the Juniors, he had only to whistle through his fingers. His cabin door, which once had his name specially painted in the Janīzu colours of bottle green and yellow gold, acquired a white store-bought sticker with the words, “Hello, my name is: NakamUra Yuuji” scrawled in romaji. When he tried to peel the sticker off, which turned out to have been placed there using industrial glue, he’d been left with a wooden nameplate covered with strips of torn white paper. It was fine; it was just a wooden nameplate.
There was also the one night he found his pyjamas folded neatly on his pillow all the buttons stitched on the inside…
All of these he could take in stride after some calming mental exercises and reading. After all, he’d been the one to teach them how to sew.
He might even have thought Taguchi would be a prime target for this kind of thing, but the Juniors seemed to consider him an idol with his inappropriately timed back flips (who would do such a thing in the shower room?) and his contagiously loud, sunshine-filled laughter.
But then there was the Kuroyanagi Tetsuko wig left where he normally kept his hairbrush.
And he’d probably be lying if he said that it hadn’t shaken him a little when someone had meticulously managed to statically-charge all the rug area surrounding his bed.
By the second week, it was only natural that he began to experience some hypertension as their efforts started to get a little too detailed.
Jin’s sport-drink nearly capsized as he doubled over with his surprisingly boy-like giggle. “Is it even possible to remove all the salt in miso?!” he gasped.
Maru only gestured for Jin to take a taste for himself, coughing helplessly into his napkin. The kitchen hall’s buzz of boy chatter never once skipped a beat during his choking episode and Nakamaru thought of the dangers of lost youth as he took several gulps of water.
“You really never know what these kids are capable of,” he heard Ueda murmur from across the table, which was just typical.
When he’d purged his mouth of the awful salt-less soy taste, he chose to refrain from explaining the resin formulas one could use to replace sodium with potassium in hard water extending to the sodium content of even ocean water as none of them much cared for anything he’d picked up from uni. Also, it would mean admitting to himself that he’d just gulped down some form of resin.
Koki reached around Ueda and grabbed the bowl, taking a quick sip. His nose scrunched up and he wordlessly set the bowl back down, scowling at Maru.
“Tastes like shit.”
Kamenashi made a sharp noise and shot a quelling stare across the table. Koki ignored him.
“I didn’t ask you to taste it!” Nakamaru snapped balefully. “Why is it only mine?”
“It must’ve been when I put the bowls out. I guard the kitchen like a hawk; no one touches anything in there without my permission,” Kamenashi said a little, in Maru’s opinion, defensively.
“Anyway, your partner’s eating with the Hey!Says again.” Jin nodded abruptly toward Taguchi’s platinum head on the other end of the hall. “Ueda and Koki are in charge of those this year, you know.”
“That’s not allowed! Is that allowed? That can’t be allowed!”
Kamenashi was clearly overdue for his pill.
“Leave him be. Arashi-san isn’t in today, and that kid’s still comfortable acting like a junior,” Ueda’s tone, as always, docile. He was eyeing Maru. “You OK?”
“Yeah...”
Akanishi shoved a prescription bottle and his cup of water at Kamenashi. Maru glanced a bit enviously at the little white tablets.
“Good,” Ueda continued. “Koki and I are setting up the rope-climbing race for ABC-Z cabin this afternoon, but the Juniors need their swimming hour. You and Taguchi are gonna step in for us since your schedule’s free.”
Maru slumped down against the table. He’d been planning to speak with Arashi-san about the transfer that afternoon. “Would it have killed you to ask if I’m OK with that...?”
Ueda continued to look at Maru unblinkingly. He took a slow bite of his onigiri, chewed thoughtfully, and then swallowed, his expression never-changing. He said nothing. Nakamaru thought vaguely of demon and cyborg cross-breeds.
Kamenashi stood suddenly, unearthed a dish towel and started clearing the table to which where Jin absently pulled him to sit back down again.
“Kisuma cabin is on kitchen duty.”
A lanky, thin arm suddenly slipped by Maru’s head and reached for his plate, long fingers curling around his last onigiri. “Ohoho! Lucky~!” warbled an instantly off-putting nasal voice.
Maru looked up with some resignation to see Taguchi opening his mouth around the rice ball, revealing a glimpse of front teeth sinking deep, loudly chewing with what could only be described as unnecessary enthusiasm. A grain of rice rolled off his lip and stationed itself comfortably on his chin. He kept right on chewing as he grinned winsomely at Maru, nori poking out of the corners of his wide mouth. Maru felt a twisting in his stomach and he knew he was going to be sick by this evening.
Jin occupied himself with his sports drink to hide his renewed laughter, Ueda rested his head on his hand, shaking with silent chuckles, Koki’s face lit up with one of his over-the-top grins, and even Kame’s rare smile curled up as he looked away to hide it.
Maru stood. “We’re playing lifeguard today, so free your schedule,” he cut in gruffly.
Taguchi had his mouth full, the rice grain on his chin bobbing up and down as he chewed. It bothered Maru more than he liked to think about.
“What do you mean you’re not getting in?!”
As Taguchi leaned toward Maru, who was sitting comfortably on his towel, it became clear that the idiot was dripping all over the place, beads of lake water dragging what Maru was sure were icy cool streaks down the other man’s thin, barely-existent pectorals. “It’s more efficient to keep an eye out for any problems when outside the water,” he said tightly, pursing his lips disapprovingly at how brazenly the man could stand shirtless in the bright unflattering sun.
Taguchi straightened, letting the sun expose the obscene pallor of his stomach as he stretched his arms out lazily. He made a vaguely irritating sound of disapproval that sounded halfway between a snort and a gargle. “What kind of camp counsellor doesn’t play with the campers?”
“A responsible one!” Maru snapped, pulling his towel back from the malicious drops of water soaking it.
It was then that Taguchi adopted a quick disarming smile as he stepped back, seemingly giving up. He seemed to move back toward where the towels were hanging and Maru relaxed, curling his knees in and looking out at some of the younger kids moving steadily out of shore.
“Last chance to get in on your own, Yuu-chan.”
He’d twisted around in his spot to ask him just who he thought he was calling Yuu-chan, but turned to experience an unpleasant moment of clarity as he found the other man inches away behind him, hands outstretching. A flash of alarming resolve crossed Taguchi’s features as he slipped two surprisingly strong arms around Maru’s waist and hoisted him up. It quickly became Nakamaru’s most embarrassing struggle to date.
Generally, he flailed, kicked, and shouted in high tones to be put down “immediately, you fuck-faced, sickening excuse for a human being!” Nakamaru was sure he’d said many other such choice words, but they came up breathless as the lanky frame then encircling him tightened its hold. Apparently, Taguchi was made of shock proof rubber or something disgustingly invincible like that as all sharp blows and perhaps some bites here and there didn’t seem to perturb him as he made the run down the pier, his arms full of Maru.
Even as the icy water swallowed them, Taguchi’s arms were like a belt of horridly uncomfortable boniness. But as his bare toes scraped the bottom and the panic set in, Maru was enfolded instantly in a singularity of sounds as Taguchi remained clasped against him. Bubbles floated up as he breathed out air that barely existed and a constant metronome of steady beating, quick sharp raps of rhythm echoed against the inside of his own chest. Lively, excited. Taguchi’s legs kicked them upward, hands reached down and curled into fists against Maru’s shorts, fingers accidentally skimming his thighs, and Maru, as he listened distantly to those steady heartbeat sounds, felt an off-putting tightening in his gut as Taguchi’s bare skin slid along his.
Sunshine flooded around him as he finally opened his mouth to oxygen. It was moments after they’d reached shallow water before he realised he was still clutching the other man for dear life, thus hindering Taguchi from standing up.
“Hoho! Nakamaru-san, get off~! What are you doing?”
Embarrassed and even more irritated than when they started off with, Maru scooted away, still breathing unevenly. For good measure, he aimed a swift kick at the idiot. It landed somewhere on the other man’s left hip.
“Ouch,” Taguchi said simply, still grinning as he scrambled up, swept his wet hair out of his face before waving at the on-looking juniors.
“You... asshole... irritating... I-” He spluttered off into coughs and wondered how much of that foul lake water he’d swallowed. “I can’t fucking swim!”
Taguchi’s mouth became an “O” of surprise, his frame a near silhouette in the afternoon sun. “You’re a camp counsellor...and you can’t swim?!” said silhouette broke out into a long peal of laughter, clapping along to add insult.
It was a dilemma between hitting him again and stalking off for someplace drier. Maru chose the latter. Not only would a fight be against protocol, but he was pretty sure he wouldn’t win.
It was cold and the tension in his middle hadn’t fled. His now torn flip-flops squelched in the dirt, sucking in grainy trails of mud between his toes and chafing his soles. Swallowing back the memory of Taguchi’s wide hands gripping his thighs in the water, he removed his ruined flip-flops as he walked up onto his cabin’s narrow veranda. A horrible truth became clear to him as his hand closed around the doorknob. Taguchi or someone had locked it and, as this was uncommon, Maru didn’t have the key on him. Sighing a little helplessly, he turned on the spot and stared out at the now distant lake. Limping bare-toed back over there to berate his current enemy over such an issue didn’t seem like an appealing prospect. The front window was barred, but if he could just peel the screen off the side window, he could climb in and unlock it then give Taguchi a sound warning about it this evening. Or ideally, get Ueda to do it.
He squelched his way on over to the side of the cabin, wincing as his bare feet slipped muddier against the afternoon shady grass. The screen was easy to pull off as he used his pinky fingernail to twist the lower screws. It was too high, but eventually he had his fingers on the window sill. He took a deep breath before hoisting himself up awkwardly. He barely made it halfway up with one foot skittering against the wooden wall of the cabin.
How he could manage to become anymore uncoordinated was a marvel, and he gasped as in result of his struggle the sharp edge of the sill connected with his chin. Frustration and the subsequent throbbing pain actually made his throat feel heavy and his eyes wet, which was just beyond embarrassing.
Perhaps if he tried a running jump.
He stepped back, hands up and ready.
“What silly and very Nakamaru-like thing are you getting up to?”
Maru lowered his arms and looked over at Ueda, who was leaning out, looking at him through glaring shades from over the cabin’s front porch.
“I… am locked out. I’m just…” He trailed off at the now mocking twist in the other man’s smile.
“Didn’t you have something you were supposed to be doing? You know what? Never mind, I’ll just get the key from Taguchi.
Without a moment’s thought, Ueda hopped over the wooden railing separating them. “That won’t be necessary. I’ll hoist you up.”
Maru didn’t dare suggest that Ueda do it instead, though it was clear that the other man would have little issue making it up and into that window. He held in a breath, standing just under the window as Ueda seized the belt loops at his waist.
“Why are you all wet?”
“Just get me inside, please, Ueda…”
With what seemed little effort, his whole body flew up at a near break-neck speed, barely giving him time to yell as he felt himself thrust through the open window.
It was abrupt and as his knees collided with the hardwood floor, he realised he couldn’t breathe. Something sticky and thin had plastered itself to his face. His head struck the floor as he pawed desperately at whatever it was. Within seconds that felt like a lifetime, he managed to peel off what he then realised was saran wrap soaked in what smelled like sunscreen.
“Ah…” he moaned, looking incredulously at the greasy plastic.
“You OK in there?”
“No…no, ah fuck… I’m not OK.” He looked at the window from where just the very top of Ueda’s roan fringe was visible. Sure enough the window pane was still streaked in sunscreen-coated fingerprints. They must’ve been the very ones who locked the door and knew he’d try the window…which was just too many kinds of insane.
“What happened?” Ueda called. “I’ll come around; just open the door.”
“No…” He scrambled up slowly, trying to ignore the new aches in his knees. “I just want to be alone right now.”
“In my opinion, you may be taking all this a bit too clinically,” came Ueda’s cool remark. “Also, your window’s filthy, did you know?”
Maru didn’t bother with an answer.
Ueda’s footsteps outside died away.
Miserably, Maru peeled off his now just damp clothing, thinking reluctantly of days before. He wanted to blame Koyama for his present state; he wanted to be angry, but it was all so trivial to him. For all complaints, he felt the situation was more self-inflicted than anything else.
Now in a much warmer, drier polo, he sat on the edge of his bed, looking aimlessly at the late afternoon shadows in the enclosed cabin. His eyes drifted over to Taguchi’s side of the room, bed unmade, cedar wall decorated with manga-esque drawings and littered with the same type of comics. He remembered Kei-chan’s bed used to be tidy and smelled always of soap and iced choco.
A little inadvertently, Maru reached for his phone and found himself looking at Kei-chan’s number decisively.
The buzz of ringing on the other end made him feel that it might not have been such a bad idea to phone the other man, if even just to say hello, ask him how he was, ask him what he was doing this summer, ask him to come back.
“Hai, hai!” Kei-chan’s usual phone greeting was abrupt and Maru’s voice stopped working. “…um, hello, Yuu-kun?”
Nakamaru coughed, gripping the phone tightly. “Ah, Koyama-kun… I must’ve dialled your number by mistake. Sorry…”
“Eh…” A thoughtful pause. He heard Kei-chan sigh. “Is everything OK, Nakamaru-kun?”
Maru expelled a nervous breath. “Mm, I’m OK. You?”
“I’m OK. This summer’s been pretty hot, hasn’t it? I hope you’ve been using sunscreen.” Kei-chan laughed. “Remember the time you got that sunburn. We had to spend the whole evening… we got aloe all over the place.”
“Yeah… I remember.” The discomfort, the pain, and Kei-chan’s hesitant fingers. He shut his eyes.
“Since you probably wouldn’t ask anyone else to do it for you, just make sure you’re using the sunscreen.”
“I think I’m getting plenty.” The irony in his tone goes unchecked.
“I’m glad to hear that. How…how is my replacement?”
Maru wanted to hit something. Instead he leaned back to stare coldly at the ceiling. “I should go. I meant to call someone else, and-and didn’t realise…”
“Ah, that’s right. Sorry for keeping you. Take care, Yuu-kun.”
Maru swallowed as he hit the end button, pressing his thumb a little harder than necessary. He then spent a contrite moment thinking he should call back and apologise, but the entire issue had arisen from the fact that Maru felt he couldn’t do this alone. And hearing Kei-chan’s pitying murmurs kilometres away made him realise he needed to stop feeling sorry for himself so much because it made people like Kei-chan sound like that when they spoke to him. He couldn’t take it.
“Don’t you usually spend your free hours reading?”
Akanishi and Kamenashi’s cabin was a sight different from Nakamaru’s and Taguchi’s. For one, it was bigger. Akanishi’s side of the room was tucked in its own alcove separated from the room by a screen stolen from the first aid cabin because, as Jin himself put it, “sometimes privacy, distance, and silence are the answer.” The answer to what, Nakamaru could only guess as he spotted Kame on the other side of the room, arms folded, standing in front of a whiteboard covered in complicated, intricate lines and odd marks.
Jin followed his gaze before motioning for his corner of the room. “It keeps him calm,” he said. “The trick is not to let him know you’re watching.”
“What happens if…”
“Unless you have any interest in made-up physics and a possibly shrill recount of today’s activities, then you’re better off not asking.”
Maru sidled after Jin to sit facing him on his narrow bed. Jin set his guitar on the chair beside him.
“I was actually about to come find you. Ueda stopped by and mentioned you were having some kind of breakdown.”
Maru paused. “If that’s what he wants to call it, that’s fine, but I’d argue that he exaggerates.”
“Yeah, Ueda is a bit of a liar, anyway… but you sure you’re OK?”
“It’s just been a bad day…”
“He said you were soaked and crying on the floor of your cabin with the door locked.”
Maru shifted, trying to get comfortable on Jin’s woolly coverlet. “I wasn’t crying… look, I actually came here because I know you’re good with things like this.”
Jin’s eyebrows raised.
“I want to talk to Arashi-san about this year’s transfer…”
“Don’t tell me you want to go buddy it up with Kanjanīzu-”
“I want them to transfer Taguchi instead of me.” He said it quickly, staring fixedly at his own socks.
Jin gazed at him for a long protracted moment, chocolate brown eyebrows raised. “Now that’s cold.”
Maru rubbed his nose fretfully.
“I mean, you don’t even really know if Arashi-san is considering you for the transfer…”
“Come on, Jin! I’m the filler guy you all post on the duties you don’t want to do. Sewing, arts and crafts, story time. I can’t swim or catch a Frisbee to save my life; I get awkward around kids normally and none of them like me much either. Don’t think I don’t know how useless I am as a camp counsellor!”
“Nakamaru…” His voice was steady, devoid of any hesitation, but Maru pressed on.
“Even though I know this, I want to stay! I want to experience this every summer until you’ve all moved on. I hate the pranks, but you all help make it easier to deal with. I can get over my partner leaving, and I know whomever they send in next can’t be any worse than Taguchi. It sounds selfish and mean, but…I don’t want to leave, and I don’t want any of you to either.”
“I’m touched,” said Jin albeit affably, turning away to reach under his cot. Seconds later he tipped a wide glass bottle of vodka between them. It rolled and bumped against Maru’s socked foot.
Abruptly the curtain on Akanishi’s screen was pushed aside revealing Kamenashi, wide eyed and-- disturbingly enough-- smiling. “Nakamaru’s never joined us for happy hour before.”
“Don’t call it that,” Jin replied tiredly, swinging his legs of the bed and brushing past Kame. “It’s so middle-aged woman.”
Maru stared blankly as Jin returned with three glasses entirely too tall for any serving of vodka.
“Hold on, it’s been three years since we’ve met, and you two never invited me?!”
Kame plopped down on the floor beside the bed, silently accepting his glass.
“Forgive my elitist roommate, please.” Akanishi began pouring. “He made it sound as though we’ve had selective people join us in the past, but it’s just been us two. An activity like this on the sly requires severe confidence.”
“I didn’t mean to say it like that at all,” Kame protested a little grumpily. “Anyway, if we were choosing who to include during happy hour-“
“I told you don’t call it that.”
“-we wouldn’t choose Nakamaru in the first place. He’s way too uptight. I’d have asked Koki… or maybe even Ueda. I hear he’s a lightweight. Imagine how hilarious that’d be.”
Maru frowned at Kame for a short moment. “OK, I know I probably should’ve waited until after a few drinks to say this, but… you…d-don’t…” He hesitated, milliseconds from losing nerve. “You don’t do much to make yourself very likeable.”
Kame pursed his lips.
“You’ll like him better when he’s had a few…” Maru stared at Jin incredulously, but the other man just tipped his head back and took an alarming gulp, swallowing half the glass.
“Anyway,” Maru pressed once he’d distracted himself by swallowing his own burning gulp of vodka. “Don’t tell me this is what you do every night. I mean, I know Ueda and Koki probably spend their evening at the gym in town…”
Kame burst out laughing. “Koki’s way too lazy to spend all that time at the gym. He prefers his art, and Ueda either goes off to visit one of his in-town girlfriends or he’ll bring her back here with him. Shameless stuff, really. Another glass, please, Jin.”
“I’ll probably end up asking how you know that…but not just now,” Jin remarked, then topped off Maru’s glass. “Now back to your crisis…”
“No, we don’t actually need to discuss that anymore,” Nakamaru snapped.
“What? What’s wrong with Nakamaru?” Kame queried.
“He wants Taguchi transferred.”
“What?! I mean, I know he’s sort of weird, but isn’t that a little…”
Maru nearly wailed. “Akanishi! I didn’t tell you this stuff so you could throw the details around. And the way you say it makes me sound like a bastard.”
Jin downed the rest of his drink. “Isn’t that what you said? If I heard wrong let me know because talk like that definitely qualifies as a potential crisis.”
“If things weren’t the way they are, I’d have had one of those long before now,” Kame muttered.
“If things weren’t the way they are, I’d have had one way before you,” Jin returned.
“You having a crisis? What would that be like?”
“Much like yours, only attractive…”
“You idiot, there’s no such thing as an attractive crisis…”
“Well, you wouldn’t know, would you?”
“Asshole.”
“Bitch.”
“Honestly, guys,” said Maru. “I’m not really here for the pep talk or the advice. I can work this out myself; I just need someone to listen to me as I do just that.”
Jin guffawed a little, which in all truth, irritated Maru just as much. “OK, so while you’re working it out: why do you hate Taguchi so much?”
“Oh, good question! I’m curious about that myself!”
Maru was pretty sure you weren’t supposed to mix Xanax with alcohol, but there were just so many things Kamenashi insisted on juggling that it probably didn’t matter.
“It’s not like I hate him…” Maru thought it remarkable that he had already begun slurring.
Jin looked at Maru for a lengthy pause, chewing his lower lip. “Well, if you don’t-“
“You know what your problem is?” Kame cut in abruptly. “You’re a coward. You hate confrontation, so you don’t come out and say it if someone’s bugging you. Jin told me the kids are bullying you. The kids.”
Maru shot Jin what he hoped was a venom-filled look.
“And you don’t even say anything to anyone about it…”
“I just don’t think it would look very responsible if I went running to someone-“
“That’s what your partner’s there for! So if he’s the problem, go talk to him.”
Maru sat, absorbing these words, his eyes wandering about the room and landing for short moment on a poster to his right of a muscular man with eyes that one could liken to a dead sea creature. After downing that much vodka in such a short extension of time, he wondered vaguely whether he was well and truly plastered yet.
“You might be right, but…it’s not as if it’s easy to talk someone out of being annoying… but as useless as I am, I’m not a coward…” With some resolve, he pushed himself up, scrambling a little to get off the bed. If he was going to work up the state of mind to speak with Taguchi honestly without backpedalling then there was no time like the present.
Unfortunately, his legs had something else in mind as his socked feet touched the floor. He stumbled forward, his arms grasping at air and landing smack dab on the upper edge of that poster. Unable to control gravity, Maru’s fingers pulled down as his already injured knee crashed to the floor. The tearing was a resounding harmony to his own yelp of pain and the duet of wails from behind him.
“Yamapi!”
Clutching half the poster in hand, Maru winced and turned to face two identical looks of horror.
“You did not just do that,” Kame remarked decisively.
Jin buried his face in his hands.
Maru had no words.
It was relatively dark for a hot summer night. The only thing lighting his way back was the distant lights from the mess hall and the dim pale glow from the quarter moon. It was such that Maru didn’t spot Taguchi leaning against the porch banister in front of their cabin door until he was a mere metre away.
“Nakamaru-kun?”
“Mm, it’s me.”
The younger man straightened, reaching into his khakis pocket to pull out a can of something. Without even a pause, he offered it up. “Here you go; I was in town during the free hours and I picked up a few.”
Maru walked forward, gazing uneasily at the dark silhouette proffering something in its hand. Beer. After the mini disaster in Jin and Kame’s cabin, he definitely didn’t need to be drinking again. He accepted it all the same and watched as Taguchi leaned back against the banister, his bright hair the only thing glinting in the dying light.
“I have something I want to talk to you about,” Maru finally blurted out, hoping he sounded at the very least sober. He took a seat on the steps in front of the door.
He felt Taguchi’s gaze drift toward him, lingering for the longest time. “Really?” he said finally, cheer drenching his tone.
Maru felt he would lose his nerve too quickly. What was he even planning to say? Could he sit there and list all of Taguchi’s transgressions and expect that that alone should exonerate his own anger. He was apologising as well, which made getting any more upset just plain irrational…
Taguchi blew out a relaxed breath. “Neither of us is very good at this job, are we?”
Nakamaru blinked up at the other man, somehow wishing that even in this dark he might be able to read an expression at the very least.
“But I think that’s why we get put in pairs here. Balance. Kinda nice, isn’t it?”
He had to think about this, which was a new kind of alarming. “Well… I guess.”
A protracted silence followed and Maru could feel himself begin to fidget. In no more than a few seconds the atmosphere was going to get awkward.
“I don’t quite get how both of us being bad at this leads to balance,” he finally murmured thoughtfully.
Taguchi laughed abruptly. “I’m not as bad as you, though.”
“Hey!” Maru responded automatically, which made Taguchi laugh all the more.
Maru watched him laugh for a bit before it dragged a bitter smile from him. “You know, balance and counsellor skills aside, it’s way too easy to feel like I don’t belong here.”
More silence, this time punctuated by a thin breeze brushing through the trees nearby. A little absently, Maru cracked open his can and drank a slow, healthy gulp realising only a second afterward that he’d resolved not to drink anymore tonight.
“Do you mean you want to leave?” Taguchi queried with little inflection.
Maru hesitated, thinking the question was posed at an odd moment. “That’s… just the thing… I don’t.”
His own words seemed to linger in the space between them, and he could feel Taguchi looking at him for the longest space of time. The air was still and there was a night-time sweetness to the heat. Maru leaned back on the heels of his hands, looking out into the dark, bringing the beer can to his lips, sipping nervously.
“Nakamaru-kun, look up at the sky.”
Maru started and blinked over at Taguchi. “Eh?”
Taguchi was leaning forward from under the cover of the porch’s roof, his face tilted up at the deep opacity of the night sky. The faint light from the moon made his usually pale sand skin glow with a blue tone. His hair was white in the shadow. “Look…there… at the moon.”
Doubtfully, Maru raised his head to look. A sliver of yellow stood out in the star-scattered sky. Barely even a quarter of the moon was left, nearly gone. He only registered Taguchi’s movement a second too late as a long-fingered hand covered his.
“Oi, wha…?”
Taguchi’s hand, still holding his, rose high enough at eye-level with the sky. “Stick your thumb out,” he said simply.
Maru, insanely uncomfortable with this proximity, hesitated before slowly repositioning his hand so he was giving a thumbs up to nothing in particular. Taguchi set his knee on one side of Maru and rested his other hand on his shoulder, other fingers curled around the back of Maru’s hand, turning both so that his thumb was pointing sideways. Maru’s eyes were drawn to the glow of the thin moon and how Taguchi moved his thumb until it lined up perfectly in the crescent of yellow above them.
“See how nicely it fits?” Taguchi murmured, his breath feathering against the skin at Maru’s collar.
Maru gazed silently at the strange image before him. His thumb tucked perfectly in that far-off space where a rock floated above; a mere illusion of shadow. Still, he fit. Taguchi remained where he was and Nakamaru felt his nearness at a peculiar intensity. His scent was as deep and heavy as the woods themselves, of fresh young branches leaning heavily into the lake, dragging delicate ripples across its surface, of dewed green in the heated summer, of sunshine over water reflecting the same brightness as the other man’s smile.
“Because you know, whenever I’m somewhere I don’t know if I should be…and when I want to be there no matter what, I do the ‘moon check’. Why wouldn’t I belong where the moon fits so perfectly on the tip of my finger?”
“Moon check?” Maru repeated the English words faintly, trying to dispel the tremor building up his back.
“Yeah.” He was laughing again, a sort of in-his-throat chuckle. Taguchi was genuinely amused about something he had just said. “Cool, isn’t it?”
In truth, cool was the last word Nakamaru would be willing to pin on such affected oblivion to one’s surroundings, but for a reason he couldn’t quite name he felt a lot better; a lot better about everything in general including the fact that Taguchi was still so alarmingly close to him. The younger man let his hand drop with a quiet sigh. Perhaps due to a shallow feeling of intoxication, Maru didn’t think all the much about what he was doing as he turned his head, feeling the side of Taguchi’s blonde hair graze his forehead.
Taguchi squeezed his shoulder firmly before pulling away to stand up. “Ah~ah, rough day, though, wasn’t it? I think I’ll go to bed.”
Even after the door behind him clicked shut, Maru remained on the steps, shivering from a chill that couldn’t possibly exist on such a warm night.
Part Two Here>