(Untitled)

[jeffyhasspasms]

This is just going to like spill out of me. I don't even know. I'm really dealing with some stuff right now. I'm just so confused by everything. How can God love me? It's like... I know, I talked about it earlier, that God sees me as holy and blameless and he sent his son to die for me. But why? I've done nothing to deserve his love. In fact I've

Comments

grace

[mdubbs]

jeff...honestly, i would be more worried about you if you weren't having these feelings sometimes....because this is exactly what growth comes with. The ones that "have it all together" really don't, and because there isn't that renewing of the mind, they just become "trained" but lacking any spiritual growth..let me explain

Re: grace

[mdubbs]

i realized i made a typo up there....where it says But read that carefully....that we want to want NOTHING else...not something. sorry

my perspective

[katalaya]

As I read this I thought "how much of this is really based on how Jeff sees himself?" I think as people we so often get into thinking things like this man did all of these bad things so he deserves to have bad things happen to him and be unhappy, what can I do to not be like him? He must be unhappy because of what he has done. Or how could this terrible person still have good things happen to them? So much of our world seems to work that way, and so many people seem to think that way. With God though it is not about deserving. His perspective is a little different, unconditional love. I know you know that but it doesn't sound like you are experiencing it right now. It sounds like you have not really forgiven yourself for the things you did and the way you were. Maybe you did at some point, but you've gone back to dwell on it. Forgiving and accepting yourself is so essential

http://www.myspace.com/kokomoj

[anonymous]

I think your plight is a token of your faith compared to so many people I know who think being a Christian is a piece of cake. These people I know aren't Christians, they're people who live their lives any way they want to live it and place their hedonism in first place. They are "Christians" because their parents are "Christians" and when they were kids they attended church more Sundays than not. These are some of the same people, or at least from the same mold, that hate in the name of God, kill and wage war in the name of God, judge and ridicule and cheat in the name of God. They are people who call themselves Christians, and give Christians a bad name. And unfortunately, in my day-to-day life I witness far more of these "Christians" than true believers and worshippers. I see these people in positions of great power, like our own President, whose "Christianity" is an abomination of the word

You Should Talk to Me Sometime

[anonymous]

Hey Jeff,

I don't ever read your livejournal, but for some reason I read this one today and I have to tell you that I have been struggling with these same thoughts for a very very long time. Urgh...I wish I could put into writing what I want to say in response to all of this, but I don't think I can...you should come and talk to me sometime. Really. I completely understand where you are coming from. I think anyone who has ever struggled with anything understands. ~Kati