Arashi - AU - Voyager 10/12
Title: Voyager
Chapter: 10
Fandom: Arashi
Pairing: ohmiya etc.
Word count: 2952
Notes: FINALLY. (also, there's smut in this chapter.)
earlier chapters:
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 7.5 | 8 | 9
10. Towards the next stage
Ohno was watching him. Nino could feel his eyes on him all the time, but it was also more than that. He had started to know where Ohno was, exactly, all the time. He could also sense Ohno differently, like he now occupied a place in Nino's head, somewhere in the back where he could feel him, soft like velvet. When Nino tried concentrating on the weird feeling it slipped away from him, vague and shifting.
Ohno followed him into the bedroom, just like before. Nino glanced at him from the corner of his eye and saw him standing at the door, staring at something in the ceiling.
"What is it?" Nino asked, intrigued. A spark of something sharp and fresh flashed in his mind and then Ohno lowered his eyes to look at Nino.
"I can feel something..." Ohno said, frowning slightly. "Inside my mind. Is it you?"
"I don't know," Nino said, and he honestly didn't. But he could guess.
"It's the spell, isn't it?" Ohno said.
Nino shrugged. "I thought it wouldn't do something like this, that we'd need the amulets for this kind of thing."
"Can you feel it too?" Ohno asked. "It's somewhere here," he said, lifting his hand to touch the base of his neck. "It's warm and yellow and sharp."
No, Nino thought, it wasn't. It was blue and soft and pleasantly cool and the feelings sparked down his spine every time Ohno got near enough. It made him curiously restless, but it was better when Ohno was close. He hadn't dared to touch Ohno much during the day, even if his whole body had tried to pull him towards Ohno, like he physically needed it. He wanted to touch Ohno now, just to find out if the restlessness would go away if he did, but he couldn't bring himself to walk around the bed.
Then Ohno moved and slipped his shirt over his head and Nino had to turn away from all that skin before he'd do something stupid, like reach out and run his hand along Ohno's shoulders and down his spine and then follow that same path with his mouth. The connection between them crackled and then quieted when they slipped into the bed.
Nino turned his back to Ohno and closed his eyes, determined to fall asleep.
It wasn't much use, ignoring Ohno. He was there again when Nino was finally able to fall asleep, but something was wrong. If Nino was completely honest and trusted his instincts and the new bond between him and Ohno, he'd known that something had been wrong even before that; it had been easy enough to notice. Ohno had moved differently, looked at him differently, felt different. Their bond had gradually taken root in Nino's mind during the day, getting stronger and stronger. The sparks he felt were Ohno's mind brushing against his. And now he could feel the uncertainty rippling around Ohno, like waves of heat over hot pavement.
"Tomorrow," Nino said, "we'll get your sister back."
Ohno nodded, but he was frowning. Nino wondered how he could have ever mistaken this Ohno as a figment of his subconscious. Now, there was no doubt in his mind. This was the Ohno he had met only few days ago, the Ohno he didn't know anything about and the one he still couldn't stop thinking about, couldn't stop feeling, couldn't stop needing.
"I'm scared," Ohno muttered, reaching out for Nino and pulling him into a tight hug. The dream around them was dark and comfortable, something in the atmosphere making them whisper, forcing them to be honest. It was warm and soothing, almost like the staircase, and it kept Nino's apprehension in check. "What if I get lost there?" The concern was tangible between them, even in the softness of the dream. The look in Ohno's eyes was unguarded and completely honest.
"I'll come to get you back," Nino promised. He didn't really have to think about it. The words felt so easy to say and he knew he meant them. He would just get Ohno back, as simple as that. The dream moved around them, wrapping them together tightly and somehow it all felt right, like the things they couldn't say when awake didn't matter anymore. The bond between them was pulled tight and then coiled around them, strong as the thickest rope, and Nino's whole world was acting on instinct when he wrapped himself around Ohno.
He could feel Ohno's mouth moving against his neck, but he couldn't hear what he was saying. Something was pulling him awake, making it hard to concentrate on the dream. There were real sensations forcing their way into his dream: there was something tickling against his throat.
It was still pitch black in his bedroom when he opened his eyes. Ohno mumbled in his sleep and the sound was too close, Ohno was too close. Nino shifted, finding his arms wrapped around Ohno and their legs tangled together. Ohno's mouth was pressing against his throat, just like in his dream.
Nino felt warm and completely different from the way he had been before he had fallen asleep. Ohno sighed in his sleep and his breath brushed against Nino's skin, hot and real. And now his feelings weren't washed out or vague, like they were in dreams. They didn't fade. Instead, they gathered slowly in the pit of his stomach, every little move Ohno's body made against him strengthening them until Nino could feel his heart beating in his chest twice as fast as usually, until he just didn't care anymore.
It felt like fragments of their dream had somehow slipped with him to the real world. It was dark and warm around him and all the unsaid things didn't matter anymore, all that they had done was coming into focus until Nino couldn't feel hesitant anymore. He pressed a light kiss on the corner of Ohno's mouth, feeling how Ohno's arms tightened their hold on his waist just before he woke up. This was what he wanted, after all.
"Ah," Ohno said, a little confused, and tried to back away from Nino.
Nino didn't let him get far. He leaned over and pressed their lips together.
It was true this time. It was real.
--
When Aiba slipped into the room and bumped into a chair, Jun stirred from his sleep. "Where have you been for the whole day?" he asked, his voice rough in his throat from sleep and exhaustion.
"Around," Aiba said and sat on the edge of the bed to pull his sweater over his head. He tossed it carelessly over a chair and then pulled his jeans off before slipping under the covers. "I'm cold, Jun, warm me up," he said, snuggling close to Jun, pressing the tip of his nose against Jun's throat. It felt freezing against Jun's sleep-warmed skin, making him shiver and jerk back a little.
"Wear pyjamas," Jun said and tried to roll away, but Aiba had no intention of letting go of him so he settled down with a sigh, pulling Aiba into his arms. "What's 'around' and how did it take the whole day?" he asked, threading his fingers through Aiba's hair and drawing circles on Aiba's neck, blunt fingernails scratching behind his ears.
"I met some people and asked some questions that have been bothering me," Aiba said and snuggled closer, finding a comfortable position and finally settling down, sighing.
"And?"
"Hm. I'll tell you later," Aiba smiled, his hands slipping under the waistband of Jun's underwear, tugging them slowly down, the tips of his fingers trailing over his hips.
"Fine," Jun mumbled, pressing his lips on Aiba's skin. "Later."
--
It didn't fully register with Nino what he was doing until he found himself straddling Ohno's lap and tugging Ohno's shirt over his head and away. When the shirt was out of the way, Ohno reached for him, pressing their lips together again. Nino wondered why it felt so strange now that it was really happening, now that he was touching Ohno outside of his head and on this side of the Door. This was supposed to be the normal way this should feel, but instead Nino's senses were heightened almost unnaturally. When Ohno's hands trailed down his chest, he felt the touch leave tracks of heat over his skin.
Maybe he had finally found the thing that was different with the Ohno in the dream world and the Ohno here, in his arms. This Ohno felt warmer, almost hot to the touch, when he was much colder in the dreams. Ohno's warm hands went further down, tugging at his pyjama bottoms until Nino lifted himself enough to allow him to pull them away from his hips. The connection in his mind was sparking and crackling every time they moved, every time he brushed his fingers over Ohno's bare skin. Nino drew in a shuddery breath when he felt Ohno's hands trailing down his torso and then over his thighs and then back up again until they were ghosting over his erection, light touches that teased moans out of him but were far from satisfying.
"Satoshi," he whispered shakily, grabbing Ohno's shoulders. "Touch. Properly."
Nino felt his hands tremble on Ohno's shoulders when Ohno finally wrapped his fingers around him, but Ohno didn't say anything, just moved to place another small kiss on Nino's lips.
"I don't really think they had this in mind when they told us to bond," Nino muttered, pressing his forehead against Ohno's and squeezing his eyes shut.
Ohno didn't answer. When Nino opened his eyes, he found Ohno looking at him, eyes a little wide and a blush spreading over his cheeks, looking so bewildered that Nino couldn't help but laugh. "This isn't exactly what you were planning either, is it?" he grinned.
"Huh? What?" Ohno mumbled, his blush quickly deepening. "Oh. No. Definitely not."
Suddenly Nino felt determined, like he had made up his mind about something. He wasn't sure what had changed, but he leaned over and kissed Ohno again, and this time the kiss was deep and hungry. "You feel cool and blue in the back of my mind," Nino said, lips brushing against Ohno's. He stopped to draw a sharp breath when Ohno moved his hand, his thumb brushing over the head of his penis.
"Like firecrackers," Ohno muttered, mouth moving over Nino's collarbones, tongue dipping into the hollow between them. He could feel Ohno hard against his skin and fumbled his hand between them, brushing his fingers over the front of Ohno's pants, lightly, teasing, just like Ohno had done. Ohno's rhythm faltered and he groaned against Nino's neck when Nino drew his hand away.
Ohno was telling him he had no idea what he was doing. "Just don't stop touching me," Nino mumbled, pressing his lips against Ohno's ear.
"Okay," Ohno said, his movements losing some of their hesitation. He kept stroking Nino while his other hand danced over Nino's hipbone and back, fingertips digging into his skin.
The feelings should have been gathering inside him, Nino thought, but somehow it felt like he was tilting towards Ohno, the sensations pooling in the small space between them, like they shared everything, like everything affected them both at the same time and in the same way.
Ohno was telling him something again, whispering from under his breath. His mouth didn't leave Nino's skin. Nino couldn't hear the words, realized he hadn't heard words before either. But he could still understand Ohno, his meaning echoing clearly in his mind.
Touch me, Ohno was telling him. Touch me, help me. What are we doing?
He felt bewilderment coming from Ohno, from his wide eyes and hesitating hands. Nino shared the feeling, but he still pushed Ohno forward, tried to reassure him as well as he could. He slid his hands down Ohno's chest and under the waistband of his pyjama pants, gently curling his fingers around him. Ohno sighed and Nino felt warmth and desire crashing against him. But then there was something more complicated, almost hidden behind the stronger feelings. He wasn't sure what it was, it felt vague and a little bit disconcerting.
Maybe we could... Nino suggested, not needing words anymore. The way his fingers slid over Ohno's cheek was enough communication.
Ohno glanced up at him, frowning a little. Are you sure?
Nino kissed Ohno then, sliding his tongue playfully over Ohno's lower lip before he opened his mouth for Ohno's tongue. Nino didn't know if Ohno's moan was because of the kiss or because of the images in Nino's mind.
Ohno wasn't refusing, the thought didn't even cross his mind, Nino was sure of it. He was only worried that he might hurt Nino, and that was ridiculous. Nino just laughed at him and slipped out of the bed, trying to find something they could use. Ohno's eyes didn't leave him even once until he climbed back on the bed. It somehow felt like the air around Ohno was warmer than the rest of the room, in a way that had nothing to do with body heat. Nino melted back against Ohno, shivering and aching and hating the few moments he had had to be without touching him.
Ohno grabbed at him, drawing him close and pushing him down on the mattress, hovering over him. "Kazunari," he said firmly, determined, and Nino spread his legs, allowing Ohno between them. He took a long, deep breath, closing his eyes, relaxing, counting heartbeats in-between the breaths brushing against his skin. Something clenched in his chest when Ohno pressed a finger into him. Slow, inch by inch. He turned his head away, pressing it against a pillow, just breathing, breathing the scent there, Ohno and him and the dusty smell of sheets left on the bed for too long. His fingers curled around Ohno's wrist of the hand propped against the bed near his shoulder, feeling the pulse against his fingers. Ohno lowered his head, his forehead pressing against Nino's temple. "Kazu," he whispered and Nino pushed against his touch, biting down the gasp, the connection between them flaring sharp gold in his mind.
Ohno's lips trailed down his chest and Nino opened his eyes, staring into the darkness of the bedroom. His arms felt weak, he didn't know if he could even lift them at all, but Ohno was heavy against him, his shoulder pressing into the side of his thigh. Nino was confused between what he felt on his skin and in his mind, things weaving themselves into strange knots around him. Then Ohno's lips brushed over the tip of his penis while Ohno pushed another finger into him, and Nino had to fight the urge to twist into Ohno's touch, to keep himself still and relaxed while the pain and the soft pleasure mixed in him, quickly unravelling the knots they had just a moment ago created. He closed his eyes again and retreated back into his mind a little, searching out the connection that now pulsed strong and steady between him and Ohno. It was building up quickly now, every move they made together strengthening it more and more.
He drew in a shuddery breath, meaning to say something, maybe to urge Ohno along, but Ohno was moving before he could say anything, pulling out and twining his hands around Nino's knees, supporting him. He didn't look up at Nino when he pushed into him, but Nino didn't need to see his eyes to understand.
Nino's whole body felt incredibly tense and he couldn't stop shuddering. Ohno didn't move inside him, just trailed his fingers over Nino's skin, trying to soothe but only succeeding in making him tremble more. Nino tried to tell himself that it was okay, this was what he wanted. He tried to tell himself to stop trembling. It was okay, it was okay.
"Hey," Ohno said, his voice unsteady and soft.
It was okay. This was Ohno. Nino reached for him through their connection, now as solid as steel, and let go. There were no words between them and the feelings were a jumbled mess that didn't make any sense, but Ohno still got it.
"I don't want to have any regrets," Nino said, breathless. Ohno's fingers tightened on his thigh and he knew Ohno understood the meaning of his words. He was ready for this, but he thought that maybe Ohno needed to have a reason - a better one than just wanting. Maybe he needed reassuring that Nino wanted this, even if that was absurd. He knew that Ohno could sense his feelings spilling over their connection as clearly as Nino felt Ohno's.
And then, finally, Ohno moved and Nino wasn't trembling anymore.
He could almost feel what Ohno was feeling, a shadow of a sensation underneath his own pleasure. It made him groan out loud, too loudly in the silent house. It was too much. Ohno managed one thrust more and he was coming, Nino could feel it and hear it, but most of all it was a white hot spike in his mind, bringing him over the edge with Ohno.
Then, suddenly, it got very quiet, the only sounds in the room being their quickened breathing and the pounding of Nino's heart in his ears. The noise in his head turned again into a low hum in the back of his mind. Then the connection shifted for the last time before settling into something that felt very permanent. Ohno was pressing wet, lazy kisses along his collarbone but he stopped to glance at Nino when it happened.
"I'm sorry," he said.
Nino couldn't understand why.
To chapter 11
Chapter: 10
Fandom: Arashi
Pairing: ohmiya etc.
Word count: 2952
Notes: FINALLY. (also, there's smut in this chapter.)
earlier chapters:
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 7.5 | 8 | 9
10. Towards the next stage
Ohno was watching him. Nino could feel his eyes on him all the time, but it was also more than that. He had started to know where Ohno was, exactly, all the time. He could also sense Ohno differently, like he now occupied a place in Nino's head, somewhere in the back where he could feel him, soft like velvet. When Nino tried concentrating on the weird feeling it slipped away from him, vague and shifting.
Ohno followed him into the bedroom, just like before. Nino glanced at him from the corner of his eye and saw him standing at the door, staring at something in the ceiling.
"What is it?" Nino asked, intrigued. A spark of something sharp and fresh flashed in his mind and then Ohno lowered his eyes to look at Nino.
"I can feel something..." Ohno said, frowning slightly. "Inside my mind. Is it you?"
"I don't know," Nino said, and he honestly didn't. But he could guess.
"It's the spell, isn't it?" Ohno said.
Nino shrugged. "I thought it wouldn't do something like this, that we'd need the amulets for this kind of thing."
"Can you feel it too?" Ohno asked. "It's somewhere here," he said, lifting his hand to touch the base of his neck. "It's warm and yellow and sharp."
No, Nino thought, it wasn't. It was blue and soft and pleasantly cool and the feelings sparked down his spine every time Ohno got near enough. It made him curiously restless, but it was better when Ohno was close. He hadn't dared to touch Ohno much during the day, even if his whole body had tried to pull him towards Ohno, like he physically needed it. He wanted to touch Ohno now, just to find out if the restlessness would go away if he did, but he couldn't bring himself to walk around the bed.
Then Ohno moved and slipped his shirt over his head and Nino had to turn away from all that skin before he'd do something stupid, like reach out and run his hand along Ohno's shoulders and down his spine and then follow that same path with his mouth. The connection between them crackled and then quieted when they slipped into the bed.
Nino turned his back to Ohno and closed his eyes, determined to fall asleep.
It wasn't much use, ignoring Ohno. He was there again when Nino was finally able to fall asleep, but something was wrong. If Nino was completely honest and trusted his instincts and the new bond between him and Ohno, he'd known that something had been wrong even before that; it had been easy enough to notice. Ohno had moved differently, looked at him differently, felt different. Their bond had gradually taken root in Nino's mind during the day, getting stronger and stronger. The sparks he felt were Ohno's mind brushing against his. And now he could feel the uncertainty rippling around Ohno, like waves of heat over hot pavement.
"Tomorrow," Nino said, "we'll get your sister back."
Ohno nodded, but he was frowning. Nino wondered how he could have ever mistaken this Ohno as a figment of his subconscious. Now, there was no doubt in his mind. This was the Ohno he had met only few days ago, the Ohno he didn't know anything about and the one he still couldn't stop thinking about, couldn't stop feeling, couldn't stop needing.
"I'm scared," Ohno muttered, reaching out for Nino and pulling him into a tight hug. The dream around them was dark and comfortable, something in the atmosphere making them whisper, forcing them to be honest. It was warm and soothing, almost like the staircase, and it kept Nino's apprehension in check. "What if I get lost there?" The concern was tangible between them, even in the softness of the dream. The look in Ohno's eyes was unguarded and completely honest.
"I'll come to get you back," Nino promised. He didn't really have to think about it. The words felt so easy to say and he knew he meant them. He would just get Ohno back, as simple as that. The dream moved around them, wrapping them together tightly and somehow it all felt right, like the things they couldn't say when awake didn't matter anymore. The bond between them was pulled tight and then coiled around them, strong as the thickest rope, and Nino's whole world was acting on instinct when he wrapped himself around Ohno.
He could feel Ohno's mouth moving against his neck, but he couldn't hear what he was saying. Something was pulling him awake, making it hard to concentrate on the dream. There were real sensations forcing their way into his dream: there was something tickling against his throat.
It was still pitch black in his bedroom when he opened his eyes. Ohno mumbled in his sleep and the sound was too close, Ohno was too close. Nino shifted, finding his arms wrapped around Ohno and their legs tangled together. Ohno's mouth was pressing against his throat, just like in his dream.
Nino felt warm and completely different from the way he had been before he had fallen asleep. Ohno sighed in his sleep and his breath brushed against Nino's skin, hot and real. And now his feelings weren't washed out or vague, like they were in dreams. They didn't fade. Instead, they gathered slowly in the pit of his stomach, every little move Ohno's body made against him strengthening them until Nino could feel his heart beating in his chest twice as fast as usually, until he just didn't care anymore.
It felt like fragments of their dream had somehow slipped with him to the real world. It was dark and warm around him and all the unsaid things didn't matter anymore, all that they had done was coming into focus until Nino couldn't feel hesitant anymore. He pressed a light kiss on the corner of Ohno's mouth, feeling how Ohno's arms tightened their hold on his waist just before he woke up. This was what he wanted, after all.
"Ah," Ohno said, a little confused, and tried to back away from Nino.
Nino didn't let him get far. He leaned over and pressed their lips together.
It was true this time. It was real.
--
When Aiba slipped into the room and bumped into a chair, Jun stirred from his sleep. "Where have you been for the whole day?" he asked, his voice rough in his throat from sleep and exhaustion.
"Around," Aiba said and sat on the edge of the bed to pull his sweater over his head. He tossed it carelessly over a chair and then pulled his jeans off before slipping under the covers. "I'm cold, Jun, warm me up," he said, snuggling close to Jun, pressing the tip of his nose against Jun's throat. It felt freezing against Jun's sleep-warmed skin, making him shiver and jerk back a little.
"Wear pyjamas," Jun said and tried to roll away, but Aiba had no intention of letting go of him so he settled down with a sigh, pulling Aiba into his arms. "What's 'around' and how did it take the whole day?" he asked, threading his fingers through Aiba's hair and drawing circles on Aiba's neck, blunt fingernails scratching behind his ears.
"I met some people and asked some questions that have been bothering me," Aiba said and snuggled closer, finding a comfortable position and finally settling down, sighing.
"And?"
"Hm. I'll tell you later," Aiba smiled, his hands slipping under the waistband of Jun's underwear, tugging them slowly down, the tips of his fingers trailing over his hips.
"Fine," Jun mumbled, pressing his lips on Aiba's skin. "Later."
--
It didn't fully register with Nino what he was doing until he found himself straddling Ohno's lap and tugging Ohno's shirt over his head and away. When the shirt was out of the way, Ohno reached for him, pressing their lips together again. Nino wondered why it felt so strange now that it was really happening, now that he was touching Ohno outside of his head and on this side of the Door. This was supposed to be the normal way this should feel, but instead Nino's senses were heightened almost unnaturally. When Ohno's hands trailed down his chest, he felt the touch leave tracks of heat over his skin.
Maybe he had finally found the thing that was different with the Ohno in the dream world and the Ohno here, in his arms. This Ohno felt warmer, almost hot to the touch, when he was much colder in the dreams. Ohno's warm hands went further down, tugging at his pyjama bottoms until Nino lifted himself enough to allow him to pull them away from his hips. The connection in his mind was sparking and crackling every time they moved, every time he brushed his fingers over Ohno's bare skin. Nino drew in a shuddery breath when he felt Ohno's hands trailing down his torso and then over his thighs and then back up again until they were ghosting over his erection, light touches that teased moans out of him but were far from satisfying.
"Satoshi," he whispered shakily, grabbing Ohno's shoulders. "Touch. Properly."
Nino felt his hands tremble on Ohno's shoulders when Ohno finally wrapped his fingers around him, but Ohno didn't say anything, just moved to place another small kiss on Nino's lips.
"I don't really think they had this in mind when they told us to bond," Nino muttered, pressing his forehead against Ohno's and squeezing his eyes shut.
Ohno didn't answer. When Nino opened his eyes, he found Ohno looking at him, eyes a little wide and a blush spreading over his cheeks, looking so bewildered that Nino couldn't help but laugh. "This isn't exactly what you were planning either, is it?" he grinned.
"Huh? What?" Ohno mumbled, his blush quickly deepening. "Oh. No. Definitely not."
Suddenly Nino felt determined, like he had made up his mind about something. He wasn't sure what had changed, but he leaned over and kissed Ohno again, and this time the kiss was deep and hungry. "You feel cool and blue in the back of my mind," Nino said, lips brushing against Ohno's. He stopped to draw a sharp breath when Ohno moved his hand, his thumb brushing over the head of his penis.
"Like firecrackers," Ohno muttered, mouth moving over Nino's collarbones, tongue dipping into the hollow between them. He could feel Ohno hard against his skin and fumbled his hand between them, brushing his fingers over the front of Ohno's pants, lightly, teasing, just like Ohno had done. Ohno's rhythm faltered and he groaned against Nino's neck when Nino drew his hand away.
Ohno was telling him he had no idea what he was doing. "Just don't stop touching me," Nino mumbled, pressing his lips against Ohno's ear.
"Okay," Ohno said, his movements losing some of their hesitation. He kept stroking Nino while his other hand danced over Nino's hipbone and back, fingertips digging into his skin.
The feelings should have been gathering inside him, Nino thought, but somehow it felt like he was tilting towards Ohno, the sensations pooling in the small space between them, like they shared everything, like everything affected them both at the same time and in the same way.
Ohno was telling him something again, whispering from under his breath. His mouth didn't leave Nino's skin. Nino couldn't hear the words, realized he hadn't heard words before either. But he could still understand Ohno, his meaning echoing clearly in his mind.
Touch me, Ohno was telling him. Touch me, help me. What are we doing?
He felt bewilderment coming from Ohno, from his wide eyes and hesitating hands. Nino shared the feeling, but he still pushed Ohno forward, tried to reassure him as well as he could. He slid his hands down Ohno's chest and under the waistband of his pyjama pants, gently curling his fingers around him. Ohno sighed and Nino felt warmth and desire crashing against him. But then there was something more complicated, almost hidden behind the stronger feelings. He wasn't sure what it was, it felt vague and a little bit disconcerting.
Maybe we could... Nino suggested, not needing words anymore. The way his fingers slid over Ohno's cheek was enough communication.
Ohno glanced up at him, frowning a little. Are you sure?
Nino kissed Ohno then, sliding his tongue playfully over Ohno's lower lip before he opened his mouth for Ohno's tongue. Nino didn't know if Ohno's moan was because of the kiss or because of the images in Nino's mind.
Ohno wasn't refusing, the thought didn't even cross his mind, Nino was sure of it. He was only worried that he might hurt Nino, and that was ridiculous. Nino just laughed at him and slipped out of the bed, trying to find something they could use. Ohno's eyes didn't leave him even once until he climbed back on the bed. It somehow felt like the air around Ohno was warmer than the rest of the room, in a way that had nothing to do with body heat. Nino melted back against Ohno, shivering and aching and hating the few moments he had had to be without touching him.
Ohno grabbed at him, drawing him close and pushing him down on the mattress, hovering over him. "Kazunari," he said firmly, determined, and Nino spread his legs, allowing Ohno between them. He took a long, deep breath, closing his eyes, relaxing, counting heartbeats in-between the breaths brushing against his skin. Something clenched in his chest when Ohno pressed a finger into him. Slow, inch by inch. He turned his head away, pressing it against a pillow, just breathing, breathing the scent there, Ohno and him and the dusty smell of sheets left on the bed for too long. His fingers curled around Ohno's wrist of the hand propped against the bed near his shoulder, feeling the pulse against his fingers. Ohno lowered his head, his forehead pressing against Nino's temple. "Kazu," he whispered and Nino pushed against his touch, biting down the gasp, the connection between them flaring sharp gold in his mind.
Ohno's lips trailed down his chest and Nino opened his eyes, staring into the darkness of the bedroom. His arms felt weak, he didn't know if he could even lift them at all, but Ohno was heavy against him, his shoulder pressing into the side of his thigh. Nino was confused between what he felt on his skin and in his mind, things weaving themselves into strange knots around him. Then Ohno's lips brushed over the tip of his penis while Ohno pushed another finger into him, and Nino had to fight the urge to twist into Ohno's touch, to keep himself still and relaxed while the pain and the soft pleasure mixed in him, quickly unravelling the knots they had just a moment ago created. He closed his eyes again and retreated back into his mind a little, searching out the connection that now pulsed strong and steady between him and Ohno. It was building up quickly now, every move they made together strengthening it more and more.
He drew in a shuddery breath, meaning to say something, maybe to urge Ohno along, but Ohno was moving before he could say anything, pulling out and twining his hands around Nino's knees, supporting him. He didn't look up at Nino when he pushed into him, but Nino didn't need to see his eyes to understand.
Nino's whole body felt incredibly tense and he couldn't stop shuddering. Ohno didn't move inside him, just trailed his fingers over Nino's skin, trying to soothe but only succeeding in making him tremble more. Nino tried to tell himself that it was okay, this was what he wanted. He tried to tell himself to stop trembling. It was okay, it was okay.
"Hey," Ohno said, his voice unsteady and soft.
It was okay. This was Ohno. Nino reached for him through their connection, now as solid as steel, and let go. There were no words between them and the feelings were a jumbled mess that didn't make any sense, but Ohno still got it.
"I don't want to have any regrets," Nino said, breathless. Ohno's fingers tightened on his thigh and he knew Ohno understood the meaning of his words. He was ready for this, but he thought that maybe Ohno needed to have a reason - a better one than just wanting. Maybe he needed reassuring that Nino wanted this, even if that was absurd. He knew that Ohno could sense his feelings spilling over their connection as clearly as Nino felt Ohno's.
And then, finally, Ohno moved and Nino wasn't trembling anymore.
He could almost feel what Ohno was feeling, a shadow of a sensation underneath his own pleasure. It made him groan out loud, too loudly in the silent house. It was too much. Ohno managed one thrust more and he was coming, Nino could feel it and hear it, but most of all it was a white hot spike in his mind, bringing him over the edge with Ohno.
Then, suddenly, it got very quiet, the only sounds in the room being their quickened breathing and the pounding of Nino's heart in his ears. The noise in his head turned again into a low hum in the back of his mind. Then the connection shifted for the last time before settling into something that felt very permanent. Ohno was pressing wet, lazy kisses along his collarbone but he stopped to glance at Nino when it happened.
"I'm sorry," he said.
Nino couldn't understand why.
To chapter 11