"This is the Part When..." [RoyxEd, PWP]
Title: This is the part when...
Pairings: EdxHei implied, RoyxEd in fic.
Genre: Humor/Fail
Rating: NC-17.
Note: This is something I wrote in five minutes. Please excuse the infinite amount of fail.
...It was one of those fucked up dreams that a man usually has when he's alone and his lover's a million miles away from home. God knows what he's doing, anyway-fuck. Probably helping a girl climb the stairs when she doesn't fucking need it, or sleeping on a bed that doesn't deserve the warmth it gets.
But, really, I wasn't even sure what the fuck I was thinking. My hand didn't suffice, I guess, so my brain did the work for me. Though why I had this weird brown shit all over me, I'm still trying to figure out. I'd seen Alfons eat it once, and it looked gross then and it was disgusting now, with me naked and covered in it and-ew.
But it was a huge bowl. I was tied up. I was in this shit. And I had nowhere to move.
One would assume that this is the part of the dream where the long-lost lover comes in and lots of fucked up sex happens in the midst of this...whatever the hell this shit is. Maybe in a strange suit or something, ande then we fuck and fuck and then I wake up and I find my hand was in my pants the whole time.
No, no. No such luck. Instead my dumb ass ends up blindfolded, and I feel a tongue, a tongue, scrape gently against the shit on my ear.
“Well, well, Fullmetal. Looks like you've got yourself in a bit of a mess, doesn't it?”
...Shit, fuck, goddamn it, this is where the dream becomes a nightmare and I wake up screaming-though somehow, it felt good the way that his breath felt against my ear.
...Sign of fucked up dream number 3. 1 and 2 would be this...pudding...and the naked tied up part.
“Mmmn. You like that, don't you?”
“No,” I wanted to snap...but somehow, instead, I'd only said 'yes', and shivered when he started running his hands up and down my chest.
...What the fuck.
His mouth touched my neck, licking more of that shit off, and I moaned. I moaned. When his teeth moved up to my ear, I moaned again. I'd always dreaded this asshole, hated his fucking guts and yet here he was, feeling me up and licking my ear and all I could do was press against him and want him to do more.
I think the exact words were, “Fuck yes,” as he started moving his hand between my legs.
His hand was fast, and firm. He knew where to touch and when to squeeze, and didn't even ask if I was okay and kept on touching there. At least he didn't talk much-rather kept biting at my skin and-OW! Owwwwwww, that was the nerve right above the automail, damn it!
It just...how the hell did he do that?
And what was this? Why was I in a bowl of pudding while Colonel fucking Mustang licked my skin and jerked me off, nibbling my ear and I was somehow enjoying this?
Either I was lonely, or I was damn sick.
...
At least, that's what I'd thought when I woke up, tangled in the blankets naked with my hand on my cock.
Pairings: EdxHei implied, RoyxEd in fic.
Genre: Humor/Fail
Rating: NC-17.
Note: This is something I wrote in five minutes. Please excuse the infinite amount of fail.
...It was one of those fucked up dreams that a man usually has when he's alone and his lover's a million miles away from home. God knows what he's doing, anyway-fuck. Probably helping a girl climb the stairs when she doesn't fucking need it, or sleeping on a bed that doesn't deserve the warmth it gets.
But, really, I wasn't even sure what the fuck I was thinking. My hand didn't suffice, I guess, so my brain did the work for me. Though why I had this weird brown shit all over me, I'm still trying to figure out. I'd seen Alfons eat it once, and it looked gross then and it was disgusting now, with me naked and covered in it and-ew.
But it was a huge bowl. I was tied up. I was in this shit. And I had nowhere to move.
One would assume that this is the part of the dream where the long-lost lover comes in and lots of fucked up sex happens in the midst of this...whatever the hell this shit is. Maybe in a strange suit or something, ande then we fuck and fuck and then I wake up and I find my hand was in my pants the whole time.
No, no. No such luck. Instead my dumb ass ends up blindfolded, and I feel a tongue, a tongue, scrape gently against the shit on my ear.
“Well, well, Fullmetal. Looks like you've got yourself in a bit of a mess, doesn't it?”
...Shit, fuck, goddamn it, this is where the dream becomes a nightmare and I wake up screaming-though somehow, it felt good the way that his breath felt against my ear.
...Sign of fucked up dream number 3. 1 and 2 would be this...pudding...and the naked tied up part.
“Mmmn. You like that, don't you?”
“No,” I wanted to snap...but somehow, instead, I'd only said 'yes', and shivered when he started running his hands up and down my chest.
...What the fuck.
His mouth touched my neck, licking more of that shit off, and I moaned. I moaned. When his teeth moved up to my ear, I moaned again. I'd always dreaded this asshole, hated his fucking guts and yet here he was, feeling me up and licking my ear and all I could do was press against him and want him to do more.
I think the exact words were, “Fuck yes,” as he started moving his hand between my legs.
His hand was fast, and firm. He knew where to touch and when to squeeze, and didn't even ask if I was okay and kept on touching there. At least he didn't talk much-rather kept biting at my skin and-OW! Owwwwwww, that was the nerve right above the automail, damn it!
It just...how the hell did he do that?
And what was this? Why was I in a bowl of pudding while Colonel fucking Mustang licked my skin and jerked me off, nibbling my ear and I was somehow enjoying this?
Either I was lonely, or I was damn sick.
...
At least, that's what I'd thought when I woke up, tangled in the blankets naked with my hand on my cock.