why? who care i dont know, why i did it. and really, im totally aware of what im doing and what the consequences are. and yet. i cont. but then today. i was like wait. stop. i want him. to want me. i understand the concept that you can seperate body expriences from mind ones. but honestly, its not that easy, for me. my mind is always working, i ( Read more... )

ever get the feeling your doing something incrediable wrong. but you do it anyway. and you try to stop, and for whatever reason, you keep doing it. you justify it yourself by saying all kinds of things. you say its okay, but the minute you turn around your like, shit. there is a beauty to not caring about the world around you, but the danger of ( Read more... )

these are my confessions ( Read more... )

A- age of first kiss: 13 ( Read more... )

yes. i know ive been MIA. sorry. what can i say? i get bragging rights for beating P. in pool. one up. granted i made it entirely unfair. and in fact, maybe i shouldn't have pushed it too far. but i honestly dont care. sometimes, recklessness is exactly what i need. sweet.

YESSSS!! goodtimes. seriosly. i had the best week ever..b/c:

a. i had no hw for most of the week.
b. it was payday friday
c. i bought my spring break tickets.
d. i got it.

all the the above...but most importantly. D. I got a internship w. firebrand publishing inc. to illustrate a book. v. very excited. i found my sub. for sex. success. ahhh yess.

( Read more... )

what if you had everything you needed from someone, only discover you didn't want it. And when you found everything you wanted in someone, you found you didnt have the ability to need it. no..more that it destroys you b/c its too much. and not enough. and the first, you plagued w. guilt for, b/c you know that was nirvana, but you didnt want it. ( Read more... )

im talking to him, and i realize; i wouldnt even have to try. the mere suggestion and he would be mine. no strings i could walk way knowing, that. were in the car, i listen to him talk. and suddenly he that much less attractive to me. nobody wants to screw someone thinking about somebody else.

to save myself, from hurting everyone else. celibacy

maybe this summer, ihave graduated from math boys to painters. B my old TA is still around. I see him on tues and thurs mornings looking ever so gorgeous. and my new hot TA. and under cover hottie. hot in a smart beck kind of way hottie, but a much worse dresser, but gorgeous none the less. painters..yumm..and all messy already and smart...and ( Read more... )