Comments | jenizaki: Ch 1 (or kind of) of Rise and Fall

jenizaki

Ch 1 (or kind of) of Rise and Fall

Jan 10, 2010 02:28

That Wu story I posted a bit of earlier? Here it is:

( Read more... )

pairing: sun ce/da qiao, pairing: zhou yu/xiao qiao, rise and fall, dynasty warriors

Comments 5

mclaughing January 10 2010, 18:39:16 UTC

Glad to see everybody wasn't really swooning as soon as they saw each other. It's cute sometimes, but really, it happens in near every story. It's a very cute start altogether.

Only thing that made me stop was Sun Ce twirling his hair. That didn't strike me as an overly manly way to show nervous-ness. I'm not sure I know a guy that would twirl his hair. Run his hands through it or fix his clothes maybe?

That, and Zhou Yu was about as personable as a brick. But you might mean to have him acting like that so Xiao can loosen him up or something. I don't know.

jenizaki January 12 2010, 05:35:29 UTC

Thanks for the note on the hair, making note to fix that now. Not-manly!Sun Ce is a DNW D:

Zhou Yu always struck me as kind of boring, but I'll see if I can personify him up a bit. Between you and me, this is /after/ I tried to give him a bit more personality XD

mclaughing January 12 2010, 05:48:49 UTC

Yeah. I had a horrible image of a hybrid Zhang HeSun Ce thing going on after the hair twirling.

And I see Zhou Yu as perosnable in a subtle way because he grew up with Sun Ce. He can't be a brick wall. Sun Ce wouldn't stand for it!

sakurahskies January 11 2010, 06:25:32 UTC

I suck at giving C/C. But this did make me giggle. XD

jenizaki January 12 2010, 05:34:37 UTC

AWESOME XD I'm glad you enjoyed it, it's going to be a drama/dark humor story, if that makes any sense :3

Also yay for icon, I barely noticed that was Da Qiao until I looked at it a second time!