Ah, love
Well. Seems like I can't escape the whole Gothic Romance concept, so I'm just running with it. I needed to write something romantic tonight, so I did. Not sure if this will be canon or not; haven't gotten to that part of the plot yet.
Title: Moonlight
Series: Paladin's Song
Rating: PG for sexual tension
Silver beams of softly radiant light spilled across the floor in the hall, and Taerwyn could see the full moon in the high window as she entered the room. It was quiet, but for the sound of her shoes on the stone. In one way, it let her know that her peace was not likely to be disturbed, but there was something unnerving about the place as well. Maybe it was the chill outside, and the way that the whole world stood still in the deep of winter. Whatever it was, it made her uneasy.
Her slow steps carried her across the floor, toward the pool of light on the floor. One hand reached up to push strands of her loose hair out of her face. She was so used to having it pulled back, and she was amazed at how long it had grown since her first days of training when her head had been shaved with all the other recruits. Fingers tugged through the long wheat-colored strands, and she chuckled to herself.
It must have been her soft laughing that covered the sound of his footsteps, but his voice could suddenly be heard behind her. “You have very beautiful hair, you know.”
Her heart leaped up into her throat, and she spun on the balls of her feet in readiness. He did not move as she quickly found him standing in the shadows, and she took in a deep breath to get the startled thudding of her heart under control. She had let her guard down, and she was ashamed of it. “Lothair….” The familiar flush of embarrassment prickled her neck and her cheeks with heat, and she knew she was turning red. “What are you doing up at this time of night?” she asked.
One of his dark brows lifted, and he shook his head at her. He was clearly amused as he responded. “I could ask the same of you, you know.” He smirked as he stepped out of the shadows and into the moonlight.
He wore no shoes, which accounted for her missing the sound of his boots on the stone. His dark pants were tighter than she remembered, showing his toned calves and thighs to advantage, and he wore a loose gray shirt that was open at the front. Despite the paleness of his skin, the definition of his muscles was clear, and she found herself swallowing hard. She had never tried to deny that he was an attractive man with a compelling presence, but here, in the moonlight, he was beautiful and dangerous.
“I couldn’t sleep,” she offered. Her voice was quiet, and the excuse sounded lame. She looked down at the floor at her feet, to avoid looking at him. She always felt so young again, so out of place, around both him and Thorven. At least with the cleric she knew where she stood.
“It has been a long time since I’ve slept well, so I can sympathize.” He smiled as he stopped just out of arm’s reach. She was grateful for the personal space he afforded her with the distance. It was already hard enough to breathe. “I could keep you company, if you’d like?”
She looked back up at him as he made the offer, and she knew she must have looked startled by his offer. Now if only she knew whether to accept or refuse. “I… That would be nice.” She smiled, even though she was shaking, and turned back to stare up at the moon again.
He moved closer to her, and she could feel his presence in the very air as he came to stand behind her. Only inches separated them now, and she caught her breath. It should have been so easy to run away, to tell him that his attentions were not wanted, but she could not do it. Thorven had always made it quite clear that the mission came first, and she came second. The death knight offered something different, something very attractive to the lonely, grown woman she had turned into.
The feel of his fingers as they brushed against her hair did not come as a surprise, and she found her eyes closing as she trembled at the simple touch and all the sudden tension that came with it. He was silent in the charged air, and so was she, but his fingers stroked through her hair and down to her shoulders before they were lifted and pulled lightly through her locks again.
His other hand slid against her hip and pulled her back against him, and she gasped at the jolt that the feel of his body pressed against her back sent through her. His breath was heated against her ear as he leaned in and whispered, “He can never love you the same way that I can, Taerwyn.” His mouth lingered there, as he let her process what he had just said, and she made a soft, moan-like sound as he dragged his fingertips from the front of her hip toward the back.
“I know the darker side of you,” he continued. His hand in her hair began to pull fingers more thoroughly through the strands. “I know what begs to be set free.” His fingers wrapped and tangled in her hair and pulled her head to one side to expose her neck. She gasped again and shivered as she felt his lips against the column of her throat.
This time the sound she made was a real moan, although there was something almost fearful about it. She was afraid of that dark side of herself, and afraid of what he might bring out in her. Like Thorven, she could not afford to be distracted from the mission. “Lothair… Please don’t…” Her voice was soft, and she tried to summon up all the authority she could muster into her tone. When he relaxed his hold on her, she was quick to take two steps away and turned to face him.
“You know I speak the truth,” he said as he shrugged. There was no disappointment in his tone, and no remorse in his features for what he had just done to her. Perhaps he didn’t even realize he had shaken her to the core with this. “His heart will never truly belong to you. Mine… already does.” He spread his hands out in front of him, and the gesture was so open and even vulnerable that she sighed.
“I… I can’t. I am truly sorry, Lothair, believe me when I say that. But my heart has belonged to him since before I could even recognize it as that. You have no idea how much I wish I could return your feelings, but…” She let it trail off into silence. He was a smart man; he would get the point.
He shrugged again, and slipped his hands into his pants pockets. There was something vulnerable about him in that moment, something hurt, but he quickly managed to hide it from her by forcing his features into blankness. She silently cursed the military bearing with which they had all been trained; if ever there was a time she needed to be able to read someone, this was one such moment. “I know,” he said, without any sign of disappointment. “But I do think you’ll forgive me for hoping that someday it might be different.”
She nodded, and folded her arms under her breasts. She suddenly felt very cold and exposed. “I… think I can forgive you that. I can’t tell you not to have hope, but I do hope you know that nothing is likely to change.” She opened her mouth as though she would say more, and then shut it again. Anything else would make the situation worse.
“I know,” he answered again. He turned, with his hands still in his pockets, and then began to walk away. As he passed a wide pillar, he spoke again. “You’re lucky, you know.” And then he was gone into the shadows of the halls of the castle.
Taerwyn was mortified to realize that Lothair’s words of luck had not been meant for her when Thorven stepped out from behind that wide pillar. All of the color that Lothair had roused in her cheeks drained with her blood from her face, and she had to take in a deep breath to get herself under control.
“Thorven…” How much had he heard? How much had he seen? The thought that he might have heard the way she moaned… The floor suddenly became the most interesting thing in the world. “I…” She had nothing that she could say. She was not in the wrong, as she had cut it off before it could go anywhere, but she still felt a little guilty about it.
The speed with which the cleric crossed the distance to her surprised and even scared her. He wrapped his arms around her, and pulled her close to him with a surprising fierceness. Her breath was stolen away by the action, and she, trembling still, pressed into him as she looked up at his face. It was, as always, difficult to read, but this time his eyes told her everything. “I am sorry,” Thorven whispered. “I didn’t know.”
She frowned now, and tugged one arm free so that she could lift fingers to brush against his scarred cheek. “Didn’t know what?” she asked, confused. His skin under her fingertips was warm, and full of life in a way that the death knight’s could never be.
“How deep your dedication runs… That you have had other opportunities but chosen not to take them on my account.” He leaned his head down, and she closed her eyes with a soft sigh of contentment as his lips pressed to her forehead. “I am sorry for ruining you for anyone else.”
She laughed then, as all of her worries evaporated. She tilted her face back up so that she could meet his eyes as she spoke softly. “I’m a paladin. I don’t need anyone; romance distracts from the mission.” Her eyes sparkled teasingly as her fingers continued to trace the lines of his face. “But I do thank the Creator every morning, and every night, for you in my life.”
He smiled down at her, and then tilted her chin with a finger. The kiss that he pressed to her lips was soft and affectionate, and not meant to arouse the way that Lothair had tried to do to her. She closed her eyes, and savored the difference. This… This was real love.
As he broke the kiss and smiled at her, she grinned and let her head rest against his chest. His arms sheltered her from the cold, and from what she knew lurked in the darkness. She breathed in deeply, and took in his scent and his calming presence. Her heart began to pound faster, and she pressed herself closer against him. She wasn’t sure if it was because of what Lothair had woken in her, or if she was trying to fight the sudden urge to cry.
“Are you all right?” the cleric asked, and just hugged her tighter.
“I… will be.” She chuckled at herself, with a shake of her head. “I’m just…” She cut herself off before she could finish the thought. No distractions from the mission.
“Lonely. I know,” he finished the thought for her, and she stared at him. His large hand reached out to brush strands of hair away from her cheek with a surprisingly tender touch for a man of his size. He smiled again, before he looked away. “I… have been thinking a lot lately. Lothair’s advances have not gone unnoticed, but I never thought he would be as bold as he was tonight.”
She chuckled a little at that as she pulled back and out of his hold, content to just be close and to listen to whatever was on his mind. “I never thought he would be, either.” It did sort of scare her. What else might the death knight be willing to do? Was he truly okay with the rejection, or would she find herself the object of a dark obsession? She did not want to think too hard about it.
“I worry about you, Taerwyn. You are the only one that inspires fear in me, the fear of losing you in any way.” He began to pace there in front of her, which caused one of her eyebrows to rise. The emotion he was feeling at the moment must have been overwhelming, if Thorven of all people was pacing. “I want to offer you more protection, but I don’t want you to think that I do this just for that reason. It is… something I have wanted for a long time. I thought to put it off, in the hopes that we would be able to concentrate solely on the mission, but it would seem that others have other ideas.”
She listened, and her head tilted slightly to one side as she tried to figure out what he was getting at. “What is it that you intend to do?” She might as well just get the question out there directly.
It was when he stopped his pacing and dropped to one knee in front of her that she felt her heart skip a beat. “Taerwyn… I waited years for you to grow up. I watched you become a beautiful and strong woman from a distance. I almost put the world in jeopardy twice so that I would not have to see you cry. I may not be able to offer all the things that a good husband is supposed to, but I promise that you will have my devotion until the end of time.”
The trembling was impossible to stop now as Taerwyn looked down at him, and smiled. She needed to regain composure, and fast. She grasped at the straws of humor, and gave him a teasing half-smile. She hoped that her shaking did not come through in her voice. “Thorven Soldaris, are you asking what I think you’re asking?”
He smiled widely back at her. “Only if you think that I am asking you to marry me,” he answered.
Title: Moonlight
Series: Paladin's Song
Rating: PG for sexual tension
Silver beams of softly radiant light spilled across the floor in the hall, and Taerwyn could see the full moon in the high window as she entered the room. It was quiet, but for the sound of her shoes on the stone. In one way, it let her know that her peace was not likely to be disturbed, but there was something unnerving about the place as well. Maybe it was the chill outside, and the way that the whole world stood still in the deep of winter. Whatever it was, it made her uneasy.
Her slow steps carried her across the floor, toward the pool of light on the floor. One hand reached up to push strands of her loose hair out of her face. She was so used to having it pulled back, and she was amazed at how long it had grown since her first days of training when her head had been shaved with all the other recruits. Fingers tugged through the long wheat-colored strands, and she chuckled to herself.
It must have been her soft laughing that covered the sound of his footsteps, but his voice could suddenly be heard behind her. “You have very beautiful hair, you know.”
Her heart leaped up into her throat, and she spun on the balls of her feet in readiness. He did not move as she quickly found him standing in the shadows, and she took in a deep breath to get the startled thudding of her heart under control. She had let her guard down, and she was ashamed of it. “Lothair….” The familiar flush of embarrassment prickled her neck and her cheeks with heat, and she knew she was turning red. “What are you doing up at this time of night?” she asked.
One of his dark brows lifted, and he shook his head at her. He was clearly amused as he responded. “I could ask the same of you, you know.” He smirked as he stepped out of the shadows and into the moonlight.
He wore no shoes, which accounted for her missing the sound of his boots on the stone. His dark pants were tighter than she remembered, showing his toned calves and thighs to advantage, and he wore a loose gray shirt that was open at the front. Despite the paleness of his skin, the definition of his muscles was clear, and she found herself swallowing hard. She had never tried to deny that he was an attractive man with a compelling presence, but here, in the moonlight, he was beautiful and dangerous.
“I couldn’t sleep,” she offered. Her voice was quiet, and the excuse sounded lame. She looked down at the floor at her feet, to avoid looking at him. She always felt so young again, so out of place, around both him and Thorven. At least with the cleric she knew where she stood.
“It has been a long time since I’ve slept well, so I can sympathize.” He smiled as he stopped just out of arm’s reach. She was grateful for the personal space he afforded her with the distance. It was already hard enough to breathe. “I could keep you company, if you’d like?”
She looked back up at him as he made the offer, and she knew she must have looked startled by his offer. Now if only she knew whether to accept or refuse. “I… That would be nice.” She smiled, even though she was shaking, and turned back to stare up at the moon again.
He moved closer to her, and she could feel his presence in the very air as he came to stand behind her. Only inches separated them now, and she caught her breath. It should have been so easy to run away, to tell him that his attentions were not wanted, but she could not do it. Thorven had always made it quite clear that the mission came first, and she came second. The death knight offered something different, something very attractive to the lonely, grown woman she had turned into.
The feel of his fingers as they brushed against her hair did not come as a surprise, and she found her eyes closing as she trembled at the simple touch and all the sudden tension that came with it. He was silent in the charged air, and so was she, but his fingers stroked through her hair and down to her shoulders before they were lifted and pulled lightly through her locks again.
His other hand slid against her hip and pulled her back against him, and she gasped at the jolt that the feel of his body pressed against her back sent through her. His breath was heated against her ear as he leaned in and whispered, “He can never love you the same way that I can, Taerwyn.” His mouth lingered there, as he let her process what he had just said, and she made a soft, moan-like sound as he dragged his fingertips from the front of her hip toward the back.
“I know the darker side of you,” he continued. His hand in her hair began to pull fingers more thoroughly through the strands. “I know what begs to be set free.” His fingers wrapped and tangled in her hair and pulled her head to one side to expose her neck. She gasped again and shivered as she felt his lips against the column of her throat.
This time the sound she made was a real moan, although there was something almost fearful about it. She was afraid of that dark side of herself, and afraid of what he might bring out in her. Like Thorven, she could not afford to be distracted from the mission. “Lothair… Please don’t…” Her voice was soft, and she tried to summon up all the authority she could muster into her tone. When he relaxed his hold on her, she was quick to take two steps away and turned to face him.
“You know I speak the truth,” he said as he shrugged. There was no disappointment in his tone, and no remorse in his features for what he had just done to her. Perhaps he didn’t even realize he had shaken her to the core with this. “His heart will never truly belong to you. Mine… already does.” He spread his hands out in front of him, and the gesture was so open and even vulnerable that she sighed.
“I… I can’t. I am truly sorry, Lothair, believe me when I say that. But my heart has belonged to him since before I could even recognize it as that. You have no idea how much I wish I could return your feelings, but…” She let it trail off into silence. He was a smart man; he would get the point.
He shrugged again, and slipped his hands into his pants pockets. There was something vulnerable about him in that moment, something hurt, but he quickly managed to hide it from her by forcing his features into blankness. She silently cursed the military bearing with which they had all been trained; if ever there was a time she needed to be able to read someone, this was one such moment. “I know,” he said, without any sign of disappointment. “But I do think you’ll forgive me for hoping that someday it might be different.”
She nodded, and folded her arms under her breasts. She suddenly felt very cold and exposed. “I… think I can forgive you that. I can’t tell you not to have hope, but I do hope you know that nothing is likely to change.” She opened her mouth as though she would say more, and then shut it again. Anything else would make the situation worse.
“I know,” he answered again. He turned, with his hands still in his pockets, and then began to walk away. As he passed a wide pillar, he spoke again. “You’re lucky, you know.” And then he was gone into the shadows of the halls of the castle.
Taerwyn was mortified to realize that Lothair’s words of luck had not been meant for her when Thorven stepped out from behind that wide pillar. All of the color that Lothair had roused in her cheeks drained with her blood from her face, and she had to take in a deep breath to get herself under control.
“Thorven…” How much had he heard? How much had he seen? The thought that he might have heard the way she moaned… The floor suddenly became the most interesting thing in the world. “I…” She had nothing that she could say. She was not in the wrong, as she had cut it off before it could go anywhere, but she still felt a little guilty about it.
The speed with which the cleric crossed the distance to her surprised and even scared her. He wrapped his arms around her, and pulled her close to him with a surprising fierceness. Her breath was stolen away by the action, and she, trembling still, pressed into him as she looked up at his face. It was, as always, difficult to read, but this time his eyes told her everything. “I am sorry,” Thorven whispered. “I didn’t know.”
She frowned now, and tugged one arm free so that she could lift fingers to brush against his scarred cheek. “Didn’t know what?” she asked, confused. His skin under her fingertips was warm, and full of life in a way that the death knight’s could never be.
“How deep your dedication runs… That you have had other opportunities but chosen not to take them on my account.” He leaned his head down, and she closed her eyes with a soft sigh of contentment as his lips pressed to her forehead. “I am sorry for ruining you for anyone else.”
She laughed then, as all of her worries evaporated. She tilted her face back up so that she could meet his eyes as she spoke softly. “I’m a paladin. I don’t need anyone; romance distracts from the mission.” Her eyes sparkled teasingly as her fingers continued to trace the lines of his face. “But I do thank the Creator every morning, and every night, for you in my life.”
He smiled down at her, and then tilted her chin with a finger. The kiss that he pressed to her lips was soft and affectionate, and not meant to arouse the way that Lothair had tried to do to her. She closed her eyes, and savored the difference. This… This was real love.
As he broke the kiss and smiled at her, she grinned and let her head rest against his chest. His arms sheltered her from the cold, and from what she knew lurked in the darkness. She breathed in deeply, and took in his scent and his calming presence. Her heart began to pound faster, and she pressed herself closer against him. She wasn’t sure if it was because of what Lothair had woken in her, or if she was trying to fight the sudden urge to cry.
“Are you all right?” the cleric asked, and just hugged her tighter.
“I… will be.” She chuckled at herself, with a shake of her head. “I’m just…” She cut herself off before she could finish the thought. No distractions from the mission.
“Lonely. I know,” he finished the thought for her, and she stared at him. His large hand reached out to brush strands of hair away from her cheek with a surprisingly tender touch for a man of his size. He smiled again, before he looked away. “I… have been thinking a lot lately. Lothair’s advances have not gone unnoticed, but I never thought he would be as bold as he was tonight.”
She chuckled a little at that as she pulled back and out of his hold, content to just be close and to listen to whatever was on his mind. “I never thought he would be, either.” It did sort of scare her. What else might the death knight be willing to do? Was he truly okay with the rejection, or would she find herself the object of a dark obsession? She did not want to think too hard about it.
“I worry about you, Taerwyn. You are the only one that inspires fear in me, the fear of losing you in any way.” He began to pace there in front of her, which caused one of her eyebrows to rise. The emotion he was feeling at the moment must have been overwhelming, if Thorven of all people was pacing. “I want to offer you more protection, but I don’t want you to think that I do this just for that reason. It is… something I have wanted for a long time. I thought to put it off, in the hopes that we would be able to concentrate solely on the mission, but it would seem that others have other ideas.”
She listened, and her head tilted slightly to one side as she tried to figure out what he was getting at. “What is it that you intend to do?” She might as well just get the question out there directly.
It was when he stopped his pacing and dropped to one knee in front of her that she felt her heart skip a beat. “Taerwyn… I waited years for you to grow up. I watched you become a beautiful and strong woman from a distance. I almost put the world in jeopardy twice so that I would not have to see you cry. I may not be able to offer all the things that a good husband is supposed to, but I promise that you will have my devotion until the end of time.”
The trembling was impossible to stop now as Taerwyn looked down at him, and smiled. She needed to regain composure, and fast. She grasped at the straws of humor, and gave him a teasing half-smile. She hoped that her shaking did not come through in her voice. “Thorven Soldaris, are you asking what I think you’re asking?”
He smiled widely back at her. “Only if you think that I am asking you to marry me,” he answered.