Needless to say this past week has been really draining in all kinds of ways. Driving back and forth, exhaustion. And emotionally of course, not only dealing with my own emotions about loss, but watching my Grandpa go through this process of grieving, where none of us can stop the aching for her. They spent everyday together since they were 7 and 8 ( Read more... )

Ah well. I am definitly feeling so much better. Zack drove down here yesterday when he was done with classes.
It was really nice out so we walked around, then drove into Bronxville and had JAPANEEEEEESEEE.
We needed some time to each other.
It was really cute, and tres nice.
We watched the Godfather since we've never seen it. I've seen parts, but it ( Read more... )

    I am a dork and worship John Frusciante like a god. I made a mood theme of him :)

    I am done with classes for the week. I have a large list of things I have to do for next week ( Read more... )

With nothing poignant left to say,
I could depart this day.
Leave and never return, forgotten, buried, put away.
Tucked away in old books, albums, where memories dwell.
Your swelling temporary heart, temporarily despaired.
I would grieve a lifetime for you.
I would spend a lifetime awaiting reunion.
You wouldn't ever dream of me again.
I could never not ( Read more... )

I love cool air sunrise sunset quiet midnight love drinking rainwater flowing souls connected threads and heartstrings pulling gently on me you everyone and everything all around us. Daylight moonlight starlight shining all around us.

I built my house of hearts
On bones.
Wept my sorrows away
On lonesome nights
Where only the wind wailed.
And her cries carried out far
Over the ocean.

Your cold eyes looking back at me
Won't let me move
Won't let me speak
I'm held in moonstruck gleaming stare
From eyes around me
Seeing through.

The need and hunger pushing harder
Against my ribs
Against my will
I'm struggling against raging currents
The tides that ebb and flow
Can drag me under.

I am overflowing now
Yielding to your beckoning tides,
Abiding because
I know you've waited.
And I've waited
On moonlit shores.
For sun-filled dawn
In your arms.

    Part of my wishes that my last day of high school had been more normal. I wish that we weren't just allowed to leave, and that we had regular classes and that our teachers talked to us because today just felt...different. And I am so sad. I didn't think I'd be this sad about leaving. But I realized it's not really "high school" I am going to ( Read more... )