Going down to Yasgur's Farm
I feel like I retired again tonight, letting go of the two things that have plagued me for six months like work, but more self-inflictedly - online gaming and academia.
This evening would have been an exam (in the room without tables, yay) and therefore was the ideal time to drop out of my course on biological basis of behaviour. Originally I thought as it's my favourite subject this would be a good thing to restart my formal studies after all these years, but it didn't turn out that way. Partly because it's so badly taught: I don't want to hear the symptoms of dementia read out haltingly by someone showing all of them, or be told that 3% means 4 or 5 out of every hundred. But mainly it's the stress of being judged, the agoraphobic horror that stopped me learning to drive for decades. And it's particularly annoying to have my interest in the subject stamped out, as usually happens when being taught something in a formal way. I hope I can get back into it via proper books and internets.
Also this evening my online game ended, after 6 months of 24 hour activity thoroughly wore me out (complete with temper tantrums and associated door damage). Ironically it's a game format I devised long ago and dropped because it was so hard on the players as it completely takes over their lives, but later designers have been less merciful. The trick now is to go cold turkey and manage not to sign up for another year of it (which luckily I have a minder to discourage by killing me if I try it).
Now the bombers riding shotgun have finally turned to butterflies it's time to tune in, turn on and drop out - where are Woodstock and the Summer of Love when you need them?
This evening would have been an exam (in the room without tables, yay) and therefore was the ideal time to drop out of my course on biological basis of behaviour. Originally I thought as it's my favourite subject this would be a good thing to restart my formal studies after all these years, but it didn't turn out that way. Partly because it's so badly taught: I don't want to hear the symptoms of dementia read out haltingly by someone showing all of them, or be told that 3% means 4 or 5 out of every hundred. But mainly it's the stress of being judged, the agoraphobic horror that stopped me learning to drive for decades. And it's particularly annoying to have my interest in the subject stamped out, as usually happens when being taught something in a formal way. I hope I can get back into it via proper books and internets.
Also this evening my online game ended, after 6 months of 24 hour activity thoroughly wore me out (complete with temper tantrums and associated door damage). Ironically it's a game format I devised long ago and dropped because it was so hard on the players as it completely takes over their lives, but later designers have been less merciful. The trick now is to go cold turkey and manage not to sign up for another year of it (which luckily I have a minder to discourage by killing me if I try it).
Now the bombers riding shotgun have finally turned to butterflies it's time to tune in, turn on and drop out - where are Woodstock and the Summer of Love when you need them?