Thought I Was Dead Huh?
I usually start an entry and then I would stop due to lack of time and then forget about the entire entry in general. If I don't feel comfortable enough to finish the entry, I don't think anyone would feel as comfortable reading it either. Sooooo, where to start where to start. It's bucking cold at the moment.
Our family wasn't exactly as traditional as we have been in the past this Christmas. We didn't put up our fake Christmas tree like we do every year. We didn't stay up all night so that we can open our presents the moment our mom let us. I was pretty excited for Christmas as a kid. But now, I'm into "big kid" things. You know. Like laptops.
My parents only bought me a laptop due to the fact that my brother already has the main PC in his room. I use a computer more than him. But why did they give him the computer first? I really don't know. Maybe because he didn't ruin their lives like I did.
I'm really trying to work on this forgiveness thing. It's just too hard to do so. Too much contempt and resentment for the harm that they have done to you in the past. When you forgive someone, you don't exactly approve of their actions. You forgive someone because you want to move yourself ahead. You want to be the bigger person. Unfortunately, this is easier said than done.
Yes, they did get me a car. Yes, they got me a laptop. Yes, they give me shelter and food. Everything is definitely appreciated. Why is it so hard to be humble?
Now I remember why I don't update too much. I didn't want this journal to become my internet weblog of grievances. Next topic.
So college submission time has come and gone and what have I done? Absolutely nothing (Kind of like what "touro-louro-louro" means). Quite frankly, I really don't know what to do with my life. I'm afraid of committing my life to one area of study when there's so much more out there to learn. I'm only knowledgeable about topics that have sparked a tiny bit of interest within me. What if there's something out there that really is worth my time and effort that I don't know about?
That's why I believe it's in my best interest to go to Mt. Sac. A tiny bit degrading, but still is the best option for the lost. It really is the cheapest way and it increases my chances of transferring as opposed to going to a Cal State or going to an expensive UC that doesn't specialize in a major that I want to pursue. Major-wise, I'm trying to keep my options open here.
I love the feeling leading up to Christmas (stimulation). Never really liked Christmas day itself (orgasm). Then after New Year's, it's clean up time (dried perspiration and ejaculation) and we go back to our regular lives either pretending as though Christmas never happened or become a little bit more appreciative. Haha. I think I crossed the line with that one.
One day in yearbook, Justin, Shannie, and I were talking about stuff we questioned when we were little that foreshadowed the fact that we would be in honor classes. For example, I always wondered why the fighters in Mortal Kombat lost so much blood. They must have had like low platelet levels or something. My mom knew I was going to be more than the average student because when she told me about Santa Claus, I didn't believe her from the get-go. It was too impossible to go to every house and give gifts to everyone. Although I knew Santa Claus was a phony,I believed in the tooth fairy. Really don't know what I was thinking.
I can't believe that I just finished my last caroling season with Infusion ever. AH! No more airstream. No more winter concert. No more boring interfaith concert. No more caroling grams. No more district tour. No more Marie Callender's. No more Christmas party. Time really does fly by fast.
Speaking of Christmas party, my secret singer was Steven A. (who by the way, is the person I was secret singer for too. Too coincidental and very uncanny). Usually by the end of the caroling season, I usually get enough from my secret singer to figure out who they are or I don't get anything at all. I couldn't figure out who it was because he was pretty sneaky about it. Putting his gifts in a Wet Seal box so I would believe he was a girl or a guy who had sisters. Then intentionally pointing out where my gift was under the tree as though he didn't know the gift existed so I wouldn't suspect him. It was funny because I was his secret singer doing similar things (i.e. making my sister put lipstick on his note so that he would think it was a girl). In fact, at winter concert, we had a conversation that went like this:
Steven: Hey Jeremy. I know who your secret singer is.
Me: I know who your secret singer is too.
Steven: Your secret singer is pretty good.
Me: Nah. Nobody's better than your secret singer.
Stupid kid! Funny how we didn't know we were secret singers for each other. In all, I got two pairs of pants. Yay. I should've suspected it was a Filipino since Filipinos have this thing where they buy each other clothes. Not always true though, because Shannie bought me a shirt that says "Reality TV Runner-Up." Haha. Totally sweet. I know one of these days I'm going to be bored and I'm just going to end up auditioning. Thanks guys! I'm expecting more gifts though because I'm turning 18 in three days. AHHHH!
Speaking of reality tv, my spoilers failed me! I thought Ibis was going to make it to the end of Battle of the Sexes but she was sent home last week. BAH! What else have I been doing this break besides catching Inferno and Battle of the Sexes marathons? Hanging with the cousins, playing Sims Unleashed and Sims 2, having Mario parties with Leah, Marco, and Alex, chilling over at Mr. Gomez', and staying up until five in the morning and waking up at two in the afternoon. C'est la vie. Very relaxing. One more week!
Well, looks like my departure has arrived. I need to clean the house, get directions, and check my oil before I leave for Six Flags.
Our family wasn't exactly as traditional as we have been in the past this Christmas. We didn't put up our fake Christmas tree like we do every year. We didn't stay up all night so that we can open our presents the moment our mom let us. I was pretty excited for Christmas as a kid. But now, I'm into "big kid" things. You know. Like laptops.
My parents only bought me a laptop due to the fact that my brother already has the main PC in his room. I use a computer more than him. But why did they give him the computer first? I really don't know. Maybe because he didn't ruin their lives like I did.
I'm really trying to work on this forgiveness thing. It's just too hard to do so. Too much contempt and resentment for the harm that they have done to you in the past. When you forgive someone, you don't exactly approve of their actions. You forgive someone because you want to move yourself ahead. You want to be the bigger person. Unfortunately, this is easier said than done.
Yes, they did get me a car. Yes, they got me a laptop. Yes, they give me shelter and food. Everything is definitely appreciated. Why is it so hard to be humble?
Now I remember why I don't update too much. I didn't want this journal to become my internet weblog of grievances. Next topic.
So college submission time has come and gone and what have I done? Absolutely nothing (Kind of like what "touro-louro-louro" means). Quite frankly, I really don't know what to do with my life. I'm afraid of committing my life to one area of study when there's so much more out there to learn. I'm only knowledgeable about topics that have sparked a tiny bit of interest within me. What if there's something out there that really is worth my time and effort that I don't know about?
That's why I believe it's in my best interest to go to Mt. Sac. A tiny bit degrading, but still is the best option for the lost. It really is the cheapest way and it increases my chances of transferring as opposed to going to a Cal State or going to an expensive UC that doesn't specialize in a major that I want to pursue. Major-wise, I'm trying to keep my options open here.
I love the feeling leading up to Christmas (stimulation). Never really liked Christmas day itself (orgasm). Then after New Year's, it's clean up time (dried perspiration and ejaculation) and we go back to our regular lives either pretending as though Christmas never happened or become a little bit more appreciative. Haha. I think I crossed the line with that one.
One day in yearbook, Justin, Shannie, and I were talking about stuff we questioned when we were little that foreshadowed the fact that we would be in honor classes. For example, I always wondered why the fighters in Mortal Kombat lost so much blood. They must have had like low platelet levels or something. My mom knew I was going to be more than the average student because when she told me about Santa Claus, I didn't believe her from the get-go. It was too impossible to go to every house and give gifts to everyone. Although I knew Santa Claus was a phony,I believed in the tooth fairy. Really don't know what I was thinking.
I can't believe that I just finished my last caroling season with Infusion ever. AH! No more airstream. No more winter concert. No more boring interfaith concert. No more caroling grams. No more district tour. No more Marie Callender's. No more Christmas party. Time really does fly by fast.
Speaking of Christmas party, my secret singer was Steven A. (who by the way, is the person I was secret singer for too. Too coincidental and very uncanny). Usually by the end of the caroling season, I usually get enough from my secret singer to figure out who they are or I don't get anything at all. I couldn't figure out who it was because he was pretty sneaky about it. Putting his gifts in a Wet Seal box so I would believe he was a girl or a guy who had sisters. Then intentionally pointing out where my gift was under the tree as though he didn't know the gift existed so I wouldn't suspect him. It was funny because I was his secret singer doing similar things (i.e. making my sister put lipstick on his note so that he would think it was a girl). In fact, at winter concert, we had a conversation that went like this:
Steven: Hey Jeremy. I know who your secret singer is.
Me: I know who your secret singer is too.
Steven: Your secret singer is pretty good.
Me: Nah. Nobody's better than your secret singer.
Stupid kid! Funny how we didn't know we were secret singers for each other. In all, I got two pairs of pants. Yay. I should've suspected it was a Filipino since Filipinos have this thing where they buy each other clothes. Not always true though, because Shannie bought me a shirt that says "Reality TV Runner-Up." Haha. Totally sweet. I know one of these days I'm going to be bored and I'm just going to end up auditioning. Thanks guys! I'm expecting more gifts though because I'm turning 18 in three days. AHHHH!
Speaking of reality tv, my spoilers failed me! I thought Ibis was going to make it to the end of Battle of the Sexes but she was sent home last week. BAH! What else have I been doing this break besides catching Inferno and Battle of the Sexes marathons? Hanging with the cousins, playing Sims Unleashed and Sims 2, having Mario parties with Leah, Marco, and Alex, chilling over at Mr. Gomez', and staying up until five in the morning and waking up at two in the afternoon. C'est la vie. Very relaxing. One more week!
Well, looks like my departure has arrived. I need to clean the house, get directions, and check my oil before I leave for Six Flags.