everything you wanted to know...but were afraid to ask...
today...i got my bat out of my closet...
once sundown came...i went to home plate and paid $10 for 30 minutes of the best form of therapy i could ever imagine...
i knew i still wasn't ready for the 'superstar'...75-85mph...
so i batted in the 'seniors' cage...this means 60-70mph fastballs and curveballs...
this is speed i used to practice at for high school games...and i can remember sucking so bad...just trying to make contact and put it in play. batting was never a strength...i was always a smaller guy...who was quick...so i bunted more than others...or if i managed a weak grounder to the left side, i could make it hard on the other team by hustling down the line and getting infield hits about 30% of the time. i do have once homerun to my credit though (an in-the-park liner, but i'll save that story for another night.)
base-running was my middle ground...once i'd get on base...i always had the green light...i'd always love digging in with a large lead...i was semi-known for my speed. i can remember a coach once yelling out to his pitcher, "make your slide step fast or javi will be on second before the ball reaches the plate." heh...yeah...i could hold my own on the base path...i would love going first to third on hits to right field...or breaking up double plays. i'd watch the pitcher's feet and once i'd see just the slightest flinch, i'd pivot, put my head down and run like no tomorrow. and i could tell, from the shortstops reaction, if i was gonna make it or not. as the play gets closer, the shortstop starts to feel the pressure of me coming right at him, and hit eyes would get sharp, as he tried to catch the ball and make the tag before i got to him. yeah i got caught sometimes...but more often than not i'd hit the base and pop back up (anticipating an overthrow so i could take third as well.) i'd call time and dust myself off...and stare at the pitcher, telling him with my eyes, "...if you give up a hit, i'm scoring..." i was almost cocky...but i'd convince myself that i was just underestimated.
then i'd be out in the field...centerfield to be exact. i controlled the outfield...i moved on every play...i could see the strikes and balls...i had to be the loudest...i could read the ball off the bat like no tomorrow. my speed again served me well as i tracked down balls that others might not have. i never robbed any homeruns...but there is something about taking away a base hit (and maybe even doubling up a runner) that can't be matched by scaling a fence. or sharp groundballs with men on second...charging it hard, grabbing it on the run and going straight into a crow hop, gunning it right at the cutoff's head, hearing "through" from the catcher (meaning it's an accurate throw and the runner is gonna have to earn this run), watching the short hop (i wasn't strong enough to throw it all the way in on a rope) bounce just high enough for the catcher to tuck it in as the runner starts his slide and to hear the ump yell 'out' was like me going up to the runner and saying "don’t try that again, bitch!" (i considered adding runners who try to tag from third, but that’s how i broke my arm...so again...i'll save that one for another night. i remember taking 20 straight suicide flys (fly balls to alternating gaps hit as soon as you caught the last one) from mentz...and being the first to catch all 20. and the coach calling practice because i worked my ass off.
ok...sorry...i went way off track...lets get back to today...
i was really impressed with how well i was hitting...i was smashing it like to tomorrow...maybe it was because i was filled with emotion from the events of the past few nights...maybe it was that i've grown so much bigger (25 pounds) since i last played hardball (of course...not counting the awesomeness of team etc.)...maybe the bat did all the work and i was just along for the ride...whatever it was, it felt good. cept for the one that i fouled off my left foot...but hey...it happens...i walked it off...
i took my brother along. he took some cuts, but didn't make much contact. he's been out of baseball longer than me...he left when he started playing basketball. we talked about how we both haven't played...and how i've grown...and how he was growing. he starts school tomorrow...he's gonna be a junior at pv...damn...he's old. and gabby starts too...she's going to 8th...and next year is palo verde for her too...damn...it's going so fast.
there’s no easy change from this subject to the next...so i'll abruptly do it here...
last night was hard...
maybe it was because i drank 6 shots in 20 minutes...that'll do it to many people...
i said some stuff that maybe i shouldn't have...but i did so i have to deal with it.
it's kinda hard...knowing so much...and its not that i'm trying to forget...but i know i shouldn't remember as much as i do.
so i try to play it off...but that doesn't work so much when ur tipsy...i can't help but say some of the stuff that i do. and it's not an excuse...i just do it...
i really enjoyed talking with you last night...not because of what i said or what you said...it's just always refreshing...not holding things back...and it makes things so much easier for me...though i bet it makes things harder on you...that’s why i hesitate to say what's on my mind sometimes...cause that is the last thing i'm gonna do...tipsy or not.
i woke up this morning...again refreshed...and okay with things...someone asked me how i can do that...i don't know why i see things so simply when i first wake up...maybe it's my 'good morning' attitude. i really do wake up and think to myself, "today is gonna be a good day." yeah i'm weird like that...
it was raining when i woke up...and at some point i scaled the wall of rachael's patio, hoping to find a spot to hide in the rain...but i couldn't find any so i came back down...heh...reminds me of such great heights...
i went to the lute olsen all-star game with frank after a breakfast mix-up...i was so happy i got to see that...so many amazing players were there! and then we went to taco bell...and it was guy time with frank...frank's not like most guys...and i mean that in a great way. i mean...there is a very 'girl-crazy' side to both frank and say...brian. but i could never see frank being as direct about it as brian. yeah...brian as sounds like a pervert sometimes...most guys can. frank's a true gent though...i hope he knows that i've always been pulling for the best for him. i did find one particular point of our conversation that i think i understood him better than anyone else could. "you've made yourself do the right thing time and time again...even though it's the complete opposite of what you want...and you are a little torn by it."
finishing that brought me back home and off to the batting cages...i kinda wrote this entry backwards...but hey...sometimes i'm a little backwards myself.
i work again tomorrow...and i have so much stuff to do by tuesday...and i'll admit...i did kinda forget about the last session of orientation. it’s gonna be another fun session of over 600 students...but i didn't get to do last year's...so i'm kinda excited about it. hmmmmm....maybe i can think of something last minute to promote the games room...(damn this always working mind!)
ok...well i think it's time i wrap this up and call it a night...
and though i shouldn't ask...i want to...so i'm going to...
can i just have one more moondance with you?
(i haven't been able to get this song out of my head all day! i highly recommend it to all...)
good night
ps - sorry for the novel
once sundown came...i went to home plate and paid $10 for 30 minutes of the best form of therapy i could ever imagine...
i knew i still wasn't ready for the 'superstar'...75-85mph...
so i batted in the 'seniors' cage...this means 60-70mph fastballs and curveballs...
this is speed i used to practice at for high school games...and i can remember sucking so bad...just trying to make contact and put it in play. batting was never a strength...i was always a smaller guy...who was quick...so i bunted more than others...or if i managed a weak grounder to the left side, i could make it hard on the other team by hustling down the line and getting infield hits about 30% of the time. i do have once homerun to my credit though (an in-the-park liner, but i'll save that story for another night.)
base-running was my middle ground...once i'd get on base...i always had the green light...i'd always love digging in with a large lead...i was semi-known for my speed. i can remember a coach once yelling out to his pitcher, "make your slide step fast or javi will be on second before the ball reaches the plate." heh...yeah...i could hold my own on the base path...i would love going first to third on hits to right field...or breaking up double plays. i'd watch the pitcher's feet and once i'd see just the slightest flinch, i'd pivot, put my head down and run like no tomorrow. and i could tell, from the shortstops reaction, if i was gonna make it or not. as the play gets closer, the shortstop starts to feel the pressure of me coming right at him, and hit eyes would get sharp, as he tried to catch the ball and make the tag before i got to him. yeah i got caught sometimes...but more often than not i'd hit the base and pop back up (anticipating an overthrow so i could take third as well.) i'd call time and dust myself off...and stare at the pitcher, telling him with my eyes, "...if you give up a hit, i'm scoring..." i was almost cocky...but i'd convince myself that i was just underestimated.
then i'd be out in the field...centerfield to be exact. i controlled the outfield...i moved on every play...i could see the strikes and balls...i had to be the loudest...i could read the ball off the bat like no tomorrow. my speed again served me well as i tracked down balls that others might not have. i never robbed any homeruns...but there is something about taking away a base hit (and maybe even doubling up a runner) that can't be matched by scaling a fence. or sharp groundballs with men on second...charging it hard, grabbing it on the run and going straight into a crow hop, gunning it right at the cutoff's head, hearing "through" from the catcher (meaning it's an accurate throw and the runner is gonna have to earn this run), watching the short hop (i wasn't strong enough to throw it all the way in on a rope) bounce just high enough for the catcher to tuck it in as the runner starts his slide and to hear the ump yell 'out' was like me going up to the runner and saying "don’t try that again, bitch!" (i considered adding runners who try to tag from third, but that’s how i broke my arm...so again...i'll save that one for another night. i remember taking 20 straight suicide flys (fly balls to alternating gaps hit as soon as you caught the last one) from mentz...and being the first to catch all 20. and the coach calling practice because i worked my ass off.
ok...sorry...i went way off track...lets get back to today...
i was really impressed with how well i was hitting...i was smashing it like to tomorrow...maybe it was because i was filled with emotion from the events of the past few nights...maybe it was that i've grown so much bigger (25 pounds) since i last played hardball (of course...not counting the awesomeness of team etc.)...maybe the bat did all the work and i was just along for the ride...whatever it was, it felt good. cept for the one that i fouled off my left foot...but hey...it happens...i walked it off...
i took my brother along. he took some cuts, but didn't make much contact. he's been out of baseball longer than me...he left when he started playing basketball. we talked about how we both haven't played...and how i've grown...and how he was growing. he starts school tomorrow...he's gonna be a junior at pv...damn...he's old. and gabby starts too...she's going to 8th...and next year is palo verde for her too...damn...it's going so fast.
there’s no easy change from this subject to the next...so i'll abruptly do it here...
last night was hard...
maybe it was because i drank 6 shots in 20 minutes...that'll do it to many people...
i said some stuff that maybe i shouldn't have...but i did so i have to deal with it.
it's kinda hard...knowing so much...and its not that i'm trying to forget...but i know i shouldn't remember as much as i do.
so i try to play it off...but that doesn't work so much when ur tipsy...i can't help but say some of the stuff that i do. and it's not an excuse...i just do it...
i really enjoyed talking with you last night...not because of what i said or what you said...it's just always refreshing...not holding things back...and it makes things so much easier for me...though i bet it makes things harder on you...that’s why i hesitate to say what's on my mind sometimes...cause that is the last thing i'm gonna do...tipsy or not.
i woke up this morning...again refreshed...and okay with things...someone asked me how i can do that...i don't know why i see things so simply when i first wake up...maybe it's my 'good morning' attitude. i really do wake up and think to myself, "today is gonna be a good day." yeah i'm weird like that...
it was raining when i woke up...and at some point i scaled the wall of rachael's patio, hoping to find a spot to hide in the rain...but i couldn't find any so i came back down...heh...reminds me of such great heights...
i went to the lute olsen all-star game with frank after a breakfast mix-up...i was so happy i got to see that...so many amazing players were there! and then we went to taco bell...and it was guy time with frank...frank's not like most guys...and i mean that in a great way. i mean...there is a very 'girl-crazy' side to both frank and say...brian. but i could never see frank being as direct about it as brian. yeah...brian as sounds like a pervert sometimes...most guys can. frank's a true gent though...i hope he knows that i've always been pulling for the best for him. i did find one particular point of our conversation that i think i understood him better than anyone else could. "you've made yourself do the right thing time and time again...even though it's the complete opposite of what you want...and you are a little torn by it."
finishing that brought me back home and off to the batting cages...i kinda wrote this entry backwards...but hey...sometimes i'm a little backwards myself.
i work again tomorrow...and i have so much stuff to do by tuesday...and i'll admit...i did kinda forget about the last session of orientation. it’s gonna be another fun session of over 600 students...but i didn't get to do last year's...so i'm kinda excited about it. hmmmmm....maybe i can think of something last minute to promote the games room...(damn this always working mind!)
ok...well i think it's time i wrap this up and call it a night...
and though i shouldn't ask...i want to...so i'm going to...
can i just have one more moondance with you?
(i haven't been able to get this song out of my head all day! i highly recommend it to all...)
good night
ps - sorry for the novel