the end is near.. i am ready (??)
that's it folks spring quarter of my sophomore year has officially come to a close. the only thing between me and junior status are three exams and one lab report...
in reflection, this quarter has turned out in a way that i never imagined. it seems like years of time have passed in a few seconds. i feel like i was in a completely different place at the beginning of this quarter than where i am now. and i look back on how i came into this school for my sophomore year & how i feel leaving it and i can't even fathom all that has occured. i guess that this school year really has been the best of times and the worst of times. i really had to turn on myself and question if i was taking my life in the right direction. i was completely blown off the course that i had set for myself and had to struggle with loss and frustration. at the same time i feel like i have learned a lot about myself and have tried to look at situations in a more positive light. i think that my greatest accomplishment has been strengthening old relationships as well as building some new ones. i feel like socially this has been my best quarter at this school. i have great friends from all areas of my life that mean a lot to me. i have a boy that i really like and who likes me back. i feel like i am more comfortable with being myself...
and now i look up at that sign on hicks saying 'i am ready' and i wonder if i really am. ready to leave this school that i couldnt wait to escape from not too long ago. now i am so attached to it because of all the people i can't bear to see go away. knowing that things can never be the same and that we are all going on separate journeys for a long long time. i was so ready to let go of everything and really explore what i wanted, and now i feel like my heart is breaking when i think about all the people who i will miss. at the same time i am glad that this school has sucked me in again, because secretly i think everyone here wants to love it, its just that sometimes it can be so hard to do.
anyway it is going to be a bittersweet parting this year as it was the year before. but i have faith in my friends, yes we will be apart but i know that when a relationship truly matters it can survive the distance. so i guess that i am ready. i want to go home and sort some things out for myself, i want to visit the people who are important to me one last time this summer, and then i want to leave for ecuador with a clear head and a light heart. i wish everyone the best and i hope to spend some time with you soon. if anyone is lurking out there and wants to be added to my mass email list please leave a comment or contact me in some other way shape or form. that will probably be my only method of communication from august until march of the upcoming year. i may be taking a break from lj for a while, we'll see how things go. ok so cheers then! and i will leave you with my updated list of goals from spring quarter.
1. learn how to salsa dance- accomplished
2. find a job for summer- hah nope but i am taking classes
3. play beach volleyball- maybe this summer
4. around the world- nope
5. pimps and hoez party- nope :< :<
6. drink a forty- next wednesday!
7. chill on a porch- accomplished
8. wine and cheese party- next thurs!
9. prom night- had a cell test :< but it did happen
10. hang out downtown in the park- accomplished
11. kiss a boy that I actually like- accomplished! :D
12. get better at ultimate Frisbee- accomplished
13. go on a bike ride- nope
14. see my friends from high school- accomplishedx10!!
15. go on a photo safari of Kalamazoo- accomplished
16. be able to run without getting shin splints- accomplished
17. go swimming- accomplished (lake michigan in may ^_^)
18. streak the quad??- maybe next spring..
19. have a great time on dogl- accomplished
20. get an A in a hard class- most likely not :/
21. volunteer for something- accomplished
22. go quad sliding- accomplished! (and i bathed in the fountain too :P)
23. go to a poetry slam- nope
24. where the hell is my yacht day- heck yes!
25. attend music of world cultures either drunk or high (or both)- nope
26. hit a homerun in IM softball- no but i did get a triple
27. go camping- accomplished
28. go up to the bell tower and put up red saran wrap- nope
29. go to a concert- yup! some damn good ones too
30. play tennis- accomplished
.no, I, I will take your tears and leave you, leave you here, stripped bare.
in reflection, this quarter has turned out in a way that i never imagined. it seems like years of time have passed in a few seconds. i feel like i was in a completely different place at the beginning of this quarter than where i am now. and i look back on how i came into this school for my sophomore year & how i feel leaving it and i can't even fathom all that has occured. i guess that this school year really has been the best of times and the worst of times. i really had to turn on myself and question if i was taking my life in the right direction. i was completely blown off the course that i had set for myself and had to struggle with loss and frustration. at the same time i feel like i have learned a lot about myself and have tried to look at situations in a more positive light. i think that my greatest accomplishment has been strengthening old relationships as well as building some new ones. i feel like socially this has been my best quarter at this school. i have great friends from all areas of my life that mean a lot to me. i have a boy that i really like and who likes me back. i feel like i am more comfortable with being myself...
and now i look up at that sign on hicks saying 'i am ready' and i wonder if i really am. ready to leave this school that i couldnt wait to escape from not too long ago. now i am so attached to it because of all the people i can't bear to see go away. knowing that things can never be the same and that we are all going on separate journeys for a long long time. i was so ready to let go of everything and really explore what i wanted, and now i feel like my heart is breaking when i think about all the people who i will miss. at the same time i am glad that this school has sucked me in again, because secretly i think everyone here wants to love it, its just that sometimes it can be so hard to do.
anyway it is going to be a bittersweet parting this year as it was the year before. but i have faith in my friends, yes we will be apart but i know that when a relationship truly matters it can survive the distance. so i guess that i am ready. i want to go home and sort some things out for myself, i want to visit the people who are important to me one last time this summer, and then i want to leave for ecuador with a clear head and a light heart. i wish everyone the best and i hope to spend some time with you soon. if anyone is lurking out there and wants to be added to my mass email list please leave a comment or contact me in some other way shape or form. that will probably be my only method of communication from august until march of the upcoming year. i may be taking a break from lj for a while, we'll see how things go. ok so cheers then! and i will leave you with my updated list of goals from spring quarter.
1. learn how to salsa dance- accomplished
2. find a job for summer- hah nope but i am taking classes
3. play beach volleyball- maybe this summer
4. around the world- nope
5. pimps and hoez party- nope :< :<
6. drink a forty- next wednesday!
7. chill on a porch- accomplished
8. wine and cheese party- next thurs!
9. prom night- had a cell test :< but it did happen
10. hang out downtown in the park- accomplished
11. kiss a boy that I actually like- accomplished! :D
12. get better at ultimate Frisbee- accomplished
13. go on a bike ride- nope
14. see my friends from high school- accomplishedx10!!
15. go on a photo safari of Kalamazoo- accomplished
16. be able to run without getting shin splints- accomplished
17. go swimming- accomplished (lake michigan in may ^_^)
18. streak the quad??- maybe next spring..
19. have a great time on dogl- accomplished
20. get an A in a hard class- most likely not :/
21. volunteer for something- accomplished
22. go quad sliding- accomplished! (and i bathed in the fountain too :P)
23. go to a poetry slam- nope
24. where the hell is my yacht day- heck yes!
25. attend music of world cultures either drunk or high (or both)- nope
26. hit a homerun in IM softball- no but i did get a triple
27. go camping- accomplished
28. go up to the bell tower and put up red saran wrap- nope
29. go to a concert- yup! some damn good ones too
30. play tennis- accomplished
.no, I, I will take your tears and leave you, leave you here, stripped bare.