Subject!
ANTM discussion.
No recaps this week because the person who took over the writing on zap2it.com wrote it as a critique, not a recap, so meh.
But on to the photos!
ASHLEY
MAKEOVER Yes yes YASE. This is a good one. And to think I thought she'd get Beyoncé hair.
PHOTO The pose is very good from the shoulders down. I just wish she were doing a little less with her arms.
CALL-OUT Fourth. Um, I'd've said fifth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION ELEVATED They do have to eliminate someone out of panel next week, so my predictions are a little bit more dramatic than usual. She's proven that she can take a decent picture. Now she has to be good in person, which I think she can pull off.
BIANCA
MAKEOVER They bleached her eyebrows. Basically, they did nothing. I was right!
PHOTO Good, but too much left arm contortion. Regardless, I can see this in any fashion magazine.
CALL-OUT Bottom two. Bitch, how many times do the people on the show have to tell you?! YOU. DON'T. COMPLAIN. ABOUT. ANYTHING. OR. TYRA. EATS. YOU. If it weren't for that, I'd've called her seventh.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION GUARDED Loads of potential. Again, this is higher than I would've normally said, but there is that elimination.
BRITTANY
MAKEOVER YEAH! I SO CALLED THIS SHIT!
PHOTO I little oversexual. But okay.
CALL-OUT Eleventh. I'd say twelfth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION HIGH I think she can do better, but only time will tell.
COURTNEY (a.k.a. CRUTCH GIRL)
MAKEOVER Better than I would've ever imagined.
PHOTO Absolutely brilliant. Wow.
CALL-OUT Fifth. FIRST, GOD DAMN IT.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION LOW She's phenomenal.
ERIN
MAKEOVER Ah, the inevitable piss-blonde hair. But at least her photo looks hawt.
PHOTO If you look really closely, you can see a hint of a smirk. That makes it better.
CALL-OUT Sixth. Sorry, Erin, but I'd say ninth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION ELEVATED I still think there's potential there.
JENNIFER
MAKEOVER Next to nothing. Okies.
PHOTO Wow. The face is a little subpar, but that pose is nearly perfect. There's so much power in this shot.
CALL-OUT Third. Oh yeah.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION GUARDED I don't think she's going home, but who knows?
KARA
MAKEOVER So. Eighties. Must. Burn. Eyes. (Also, THE RESURRECTION OF AMIS!)
PHOTO Great zygomata. But so darn boring. What is she, a literal child of the corn? (Or fern in this case.)
CALL-OUT Tenth. Er, twelfth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION SEVERE I kind of like her personality, but I don't think she photographs well at all.
LAURA
MAKEOVER Not necessarily the first idea I had in mind, and it looks really weird, but now she looks stunning.
PHOTO Yo, Madonna, just because you made out with Britney Spears doesn't mean you can treat your kid the same way she does hers.
CALL-OUT Ninth. Really? Sixth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION GUARDED I think she's safe. I think.
LISA
MAKEOVER They didn't really do anything. Yay! Come to think of it, she didn't really need much.
PHOTO Is it clowny? No. But is it fashion-y enough? Yes.
CALL-OUT Eliminated. Uh, tenth.
LULU
MAKEOVER She looks like Brandy.
PHOTO Pretty good, but a little safe. And what's with her left arm?
CALL-OUT Seventh. Eh, okay.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION ELEVATED I'm not sure about her picture-taking skillz...
NICOLE
MAKEOVER I see poor weave care à l'Allison Harvard in her future.
PHOTO Damn! She looks so tall! This picture is nearly perfect.
CALL-OUT Second. Hellz yah.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION ELEVATED Not a "low" for one reason only: her presence.
RACHEL
MAKEOVER YEAH! I CALLED THIS ONE TOO! She looks a lot like my friend Sarah.
PHOTO Weird and awkward. Oh, Rachel, I had such hopes...
CALL-OUT Eighth. ô_O Eleventh
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION HIGH Good presence, bad photos so far.
RAE
MAKEOVER Why didn't I call this? She looks fantastic. And piss-blond.
PHOTO It's good, but I don't see what's so amazing about white Jesus on Quaaludes.
CALL-OUT First? I'd say fourth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION LOW SAFE, DAMN IT.
SUNDAI
MAKEOVER Good idea. That old weave was shit.
PHOTO EW! BAD!!!
CALL-OUT Twelfth. I would've kicked her 5'3.5" butt off the show.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION SEVERE BAD PHOTOS.
I have a book to read, a quiz to study for, and some sources to find. See ya!
For a hilariously written recap of episode 1 (check back for episode 2 tomorrow), click here.
No recaps this week because the person who took over the writing on zap2it.com wrote it as a critique, not a recap, so meh.
But on to the photos!
ASHLEY
MAKEOVER Yes yes YASE. This is a good one. And to think I thought she'd get Beyoncé hair.
PHOTO The pose is very good from the shoulders down. I just wish she were doing a little less with her arms.
CALL-OUT Fourth. Um, I'd've said fifth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION ELEVATED They do have to eliminate someone out of panel next week, so my predictions are a little bit more dramatic than usual. She's proven that she can take a decent picture. Now she has to be good in person, which I think she can pull off.
BIANCA
MAKEOVER They bleached her eyebrows. Basically, they did nothing. I was right!
PHOTO Good, but too much left arm contortion. Regardless, I can see this in any fashion magazine.
CALL-OUT Bottom two. Bitch, how many times do the people on the show have to tell you?! YOU. DON'T. COMPLAIN. ABOUT. ANYTHING. OR. TYRA. EATS. YOU. If it weren't for that, I'd've called her seventh.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION GUARDED Loads of potential. Again, this is higher than I would've normally said, but there is that elimination.
BRITTANY
MAKEOVER YEAH! I SO CALLED THIS SHIT!
PHOTO I little oversexual. But okay.
CALL-OUT Eleventh. I'd say twelfth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION HIGH I think she can do better, but only time will tell.
COURTNEY (a.k.a. CRUTCH GIRL)
MAKEOVER Better than I would've ever imagined.
PHOTO Absolutely brilliant. Wow.
CALL-OUT Fifth. FIRST, GOD DAMN IT.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION LOW She's phenomenal.
ERIN
MAKEOVER Ah, the inevitable piss-blonde hair. But at least her photo looks hawt.
PHOTO If you look really closely, you can see a hint of a smirk. That makes it better.
CALL-OUT Sixth. Sorry, Erin, but I'd say ninth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION ELEVATED I still think there's potential there.
JENNIFER
MAKEOVER Next to nothing. Okies.
PHOTO Wow. The face is a little subpar, but that pose is nearly perfect. There's so much power in this shot.
CALL-OUT Third. Oh yeah.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION GUARDED I don't think she's going home, but who knows?
KARA
MAKEOVER So. Eighties. Must. Burn. Eyes. (Also, THE RESURRECTION OF AMIS!)
PHOTO Great zygomata. But so darn boring. What is she, a literal child of the corn? (Or fern in this case.)
CALL-OUT Tenth. Er, twelfth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION SEVERE I kind of like her personality, but I don't think she photographs well at all.
LAURA
MAKEOVER Not necessarily the first idea I had in mind, and it looks really weird, but now she looks stunning.
PHOTO Yo, Madonna, just because you made out with Britney Spears doesn't mean you can treat your kid the same way she does hers.
CALL-OUT Ninth. Really? Sixth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION GUARDED I think she's safe. I think.
LISA
MAKEOVER They didn't really do anything. Yay! Come to think of it, she didn't really need much.
PHOTO Is it clowny? No. But is it fashion-y enough? Yes.
CALL-OUT Eliminated. Uh, tenth.
LULU
MAKEOVER She looks like Brandy.
PHOTO Pretty good, but a little safe. And what's with her left arm?
CALL-OUT Seventh. Eh, okay.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION ELEVATED I'm not sure about her picture-taking skillz...
NICOLE
MAKEOVER I see poor weave care à l'Allison Harvard in her future.
PHOTO Damn! She looks so tall! This picture is nearly perfect.
CALL-OUT Second. Hellz yah.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION ELEVATED Not a "low" for one reason only: her presence.
RACHEL
MAKEOVER YEAH! I CALLED THIS ONE TOO! She looks a lot like my friend Sarah.
PHOTO Weird and awkward. Oh, Rachel, I had such hopes...
CALL-OUT Eighth. ô_O Eleventh
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION HIGH Good presence, bad photos so far.
RAE
MAKEOVER Why didn't I call this? She looks fantastic. And piss-blond.
PHOTO It's good, but I don't see what's so amazing about white Jesus on Quaaludes.
CALL-OUT First? I'd say fourth.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION LOW SAFE, DAMN IT.
SUNDAI
MAKEOVER Good idea. That old weave was shit.
PHOTO EW! BAD!!!
CALL-OUT Twelfth. I would've kicked her 5'3.5" butt off the show.
CHANCES OF ELIMINATION SEVERE BAD PHOTOS.
I have a book to read, a quiz to study for, and some sources to find. See ya!
For a hilariously written recap of episode 1 (check back for episode 2 tomorrow), click here.