October Prompt for deviant_muses, Haunted
Character Name: John Kramer AKA Jigsaw
Origin: Saw (series of films)
Word Count: 568
Character’s LJ: jigsaw_angel
Rating: R for sex (m/m slash, John/Zep) and implied violence
Prompt: Haunted
Mun Note: This is set in an alternate universe where Zep Hindle survives and is working with John and Amanda.
It was a dark place, the state of being that John Kramer inhabited now. A half-life, with death approaching faster than he was ready for, and the urgency of the tasks he had to complete loomed large. Here he put to the test even the ones he bonded with, the ones he came to love. To some, his methods may have seemed ruthless, but then so was the cancer that was eating away at him. He had tested Amanda most stringently, and Zep also. They had passed the tests, however, and now they were a part of his mission. Both of them were his, and he was also theirs. Their fates were intertwined; together they would make a difference in the world, one individual at a time. The chosen would learn to appreciate their lives, or they would die. There was no other way.
A dark place, yes, but not lonely any more.
When John had brought Zep and Amanda into his world, he had asked for every cell in their bodies, nothing less. That was the dedication he required of them - they had to immerse themselves completely in his philosophy, embrace his desire to teach gratitude to those who wasted and abused their precious lives. And they had both done so, passionately and willingly. Amanda regarded him as a father and a savior. Under his tutelage, she would grow stronger, and carry on his work when he was gone.
With Zep, the bond he had forged was different.
Past youthful curiosity, John had not often been drawn to other men - but there was something about Zep’s puppy-like devotion that deeply stirred him. He could not quite put his finger on why, but reaching to touch Zep’s face with shaking fingers, pulling him close to softly kiss him had seemed so right that first time, and every time after that. Taking Zep in his arms, caressing every inch of him, thrusting hard and deep inside him had finally driven away that horrible, haunted look from Zep’s eyes. Before John, Zep’s world had been empty and barren - he was the creepy little orderly at the hospital that nobody liked, only good for the dirty jobs and otherwise treated as if he were a ghost, without worth or substance. Now he had a purpose, a reason to live, and he was loved.
Zep was always so tender with John, always there when he was wanted, giving of himself without the slightest reservation. There was something strangely endearing about his nuzzling, licking and fawning over John - some may have found such attentions bizarre, but they completely melted John’s heart. Beautiful, Zep called him, and perfect - adoring and worshipful of the ageing, scarred and dying body that sometimes made John feel self-conscious and saddened. In Zep’s arms, John felt almost whole again.
“Why me, and not Amanda?” Zep had asked once at the beginning, still uncertain, still finding it hard to believe that someone actually truly wanted him. Even now, John found that question hard to answer. He did love Amanda, and she was very pretty - but something held him back from feeling the same desire for Amanda that he felt for Zep. He hoped that she would not become jealous and unhinged, for he could sense that dangerous potential within her. John needed both Zep and Amanda, though the nature of his love for each of them was not the same.
Origin: Saw (series of films)
Word Count: 568
Character’s LJ: jigsaw_angel
Rating: R for sex (m/m slash, John/Zep) and implied violence
Prompt: Haunted
Mun Note: This is set in an alternate universe where Zep Hindle survives and is working with John and Amanda.
It was a dark place, the state of being that John Kramer inhabited now. A half-life, with death approaching faster than he was ready for, and the urgency of the tasks he had to complete loomed large. Here he put to the test even the ones he bonded with, the ones he came to love. To some, his methods may have seemed ruthless, but then so was the cancer that was eating away at him. He had tested Amanda most stringently, and Zep also. They had passed the tests, however, and now they were a part of his mission. Both of them were his, and he was also theirs. Their fates were intertwined; together they would make a difference in the world, one individual at a time. The chosen would learn to appreciate their lives, or they would die. There was no other way.
A dark place, yes, but not lonely any more.
When John had brought Zep and Amanda into his world, he had asked for every cell in their bodies, nothing less. That was the dedication he required of them - they had to immerse themselves completely in his philosophy, embrace his desire to teach gratitude to those who wasted and abused their precious lives. And they had both done so, passionately and willingly. Amanda regarded him as a father and a savior. Under his tutelage, she would grow stronger, and carry on his work when he was gone.
With Zep, the bond he had forged was different.
Past youthful curiosity, John had not often been drawn to other men - but there was something about Zep’s puppy-like devotion that deeply stirred him. He could not quite put his finger on why, but reaching to touch Zep’s face with shaking fingers, pulling him close to softly kiss him had seemed so right that first time, and every time after that. Taking Zep in his arms, caressing every inch of him, thrusting hard and deep inside him had finally driven away that horrible, haunted look from Zep’s eyes. Before John, Zep’s world had been empty and barren - he was the creepy little orderly at the hospital that nobody liked, only good for the dirty jobs and otherwise treated as if he were a ghost, without worth or substance. Now he had a purpose, a reason to live, and he was loved.
Zep was always so tender with John, always there when he was wanted, giving of himself without the slightest reservation. There was something strangely endearing about his nuzzling, licking and fawning over John - some may have found such attentions bizarre, but they completely melted John’s heart. Beautiful, Zep called him, and perfect - adoring and worshipful of the ageing, scarred and dying body that sometimes made John feel self-conscious and saddened. In Zep’s arms, John felt almost whole again.
“Why me, and not Amanda?” Zep had asked once at the beginning, still uncertain, still finding it hard to believe that someone actually truly wanted him. Even now, John found that question hard to answer. He did love Amanda, and she was very pretty - but something held him back from feeling the same desire for Amanda that he felt for Zep. He hoped that she would not become jealous and unhinged, for he could sense that dangerous potential within her. John needed both Zep and Amanda, though the nature of his love for each of them was not the same.