Comments | jillbee7: Ahhhh, here I go again.

jillbee7

Ahhhh, here I go again.

Jul 21, 2007 20:56

Okay. I'm not sure how much I really like this, but I just whipped it off and I kind of wanted to share it. I don't usually write so...choppily...but it just seemed to fit for this. So please tell me what you think! I know, I know, it's pretty 'emo' (haha), and I swore I'd never write anything about Marissa's death because there's already ( Read more... )

Comments 6

taylortyme July 22 2007, 05:12:56 UTC

this was really cute, it was different from what i expected because your last story was a 180 for sure. This has a new light to the way Ryan figured out that he felt things for Taylor. I loved the way you wrote this, please don't give up on the talent. Great job!

jillbee7 July 24 2007, 02:51:36 UTC

Thanks for reading, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

oc_gambit2 July 24 2007, 00:37:38 UTC

I think it's a fine job of conveying a deeply depressed Ryan, apparently too lethargic to even care about doing himself harm. He's going through the motions for others' sake, no longer consciously hopeful that the activity will jog him out of this exhausted lonely place....but if he weren't a tiny bit hopeful, would he do even that?

And then- Taylor. The numbness begins to recede. *smile*

BTW, I'm not sure why you're concerned about 'choppy'. It reads well.

jillbee7 July 24 2007, 03:01:03 UTC

You make a good point; I think that he's a little bit hopeful that things will get better and maybe go back to the way things were to some extent. On the other hand, I have a hard time seeing Ryan completely giving up and offing himself or something. I think that he'd feel way to guilty about doing that to the Cohens after everything they've done for him. This leaves him in a rut because he can't fully carry out either option- he's too tired and depressed to care about living, but he can't kill himself either...and so the spiral goes. At this point(before Taylor) he'd likely see no point in living if the Cohens all miraculously died somehow, but unless that happens he has to keep on surpressing his true situation and appearing to be alright so as to not worry anyone ( ... )

oc_gambit2 July 24 2007, 07:01:22 UTC

Yeah, that seems to make sense- or at least I'M getting you....not in a place to claim always making sense myself, at least some days. *hee ( ... )

jillbee7 July 27 2007, 21:48:30 UTC

I'm glad you understood what I was getting at. I agree, I think that I was drawn to Ryan too partially because of how he deals- or doesn't deal- with his problems. I have a tendency to shove them down and pretend that everything's alright, just like he does (and you, too, I guess). It's kind of a good stress relief to write about things this way I'm finding. You can take something that you're feeling but make Ryan deal with it instead (haha).

Thanks for your support, I really and truly appreciate it. I'm trying to comment more too because I'm beginning to realize how much it can mean. Having someone even say 'thank you' or something can make a world of difference, and it really inspires confidence. It's scary because there are so many AMAZING writers on here that've been doing this for years, but it helps when people are positive. I feel kinda like I'm barging in on you guys waaaay too late, so thanks for taking the time to read my random babbling! And thanks, I hope my Taylor's on the way too! =)