I'm so sorry, Holland.
My friend, Angelica, offered me a spot at her house.
WOW.
Just when I thought my mom might actually be right about my friends not caring about me enough to even offer me a place to stay.
Angelica offers me a spot.
My mom exploded at me today. I could tell she was already in a bad mood because my sister neglected to inform her that her friend's grad party was in Churchville. That town is like 20 mins to a half an hour away and my mom drove her AND our neighbor (and Rachel's friend) there. But she started cooking dinner and cleaning and I offered to help.
I was already cleaning before the game. I was going to wait until AFTER to clean the rest, but the kitchen still looked presentable.
World Cup was on and I HAD to watch. I normally clean during this time, but I wanted to see the game played out. It's just ONE game. I didn't think she would BLOW UP at me. But she did.
She went on about how I NEVER clean the kitchen correctly, how ungrateful I am, how irresponsible, etc. The same crap that she tells me all of the time, except that it really hurt. I want to watch ONE game and she gets bent out of shape.
I couldn't even enjoy the game anymore. I was rooting for Holland and when Spain scored I felt almost nothing. My mind was so set on getting out of here or finding ways out of here.
She's constantly putting me down one way or another. She doesn't think I'm capable of much. She doesn't trust me. She doesn't KNOW me.
I almost went with Angelica's plan because she offered to pay my way to Maryland.
I don't even have the words to describe the gratitude...wow.
Anywho...
she was going to try to talk to her parents about letting me stay there, but the plan seemed to falter as soon as she said that. I couldn't ask her parents to let me stay there without a job or a goal in mind set for myself. That's NOT fair to them.
Starting yesterday, I decided to apply for as many government jobs as I could in Maryland. If Weatherbug or any other job in MD calls me, I'm so out of here.
I figured that'd be the start of a better plan than what Angelica had in mind. I'm just so SICK of being looked down upon, being constantly yelled at for the most IDIOTIC things, being blamed for things my sister does and then being yelled at when I try to tell my mother it REALLY IS Rachel's fault.
I'm also sick of crying. It really isn't me.
Edit: My mom and I just had another fight. She's left the house. Great. :/