ON/OFF Screen [Chapter 20]
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Wrote this chapter about 837 km away from home. As usual, comments, criticisms and inputs will be highly appreciated. If you haven't read the previous chapters, you can always refer to the master post
CHAPTER 20
「Some Random Dream」
I was dreaming some random dream. We were somewhere around a field of grass, just like one of the locations of Boku wa Imoto ni Koi o Suru.
By we in my dream, it means me and Riida. Not me and Eikura Nana-chan. In the middle of the night. We were playing cards as we drink our sake right in front of each other, crossing our legs on the grassy soil.
What the hell are we doing there? The me in my dream couldn't care any less. Riida was showing me a magic trick. He is just as good as Nino in this dream. Even better. If it is Nino, you've expected it so. But when Riida gets to do it, he surprises you more.
And then she appears. Smiling.
"Jun-kun!!" she calls and runs to me from the other side of the field.
"Riida!" Someone else's voice calls out. A familiar one. A male. But Riida doesn't even bulge. As if he doesn't hear him at all.
And along with her, there comes Nino. Right behind her. Holding one of her hand. But the me in my dream just smiles.
"Here comes the newlyweds," I heard the me in my dream says so to Riida. Riida just look at the me in my dream with an expression I cannot understand. I cannot bare.
And then my phone rings. Loud.
Completely taking me away from that world and bringing me back to reality. To my room. To my bed.
Okay. Now that sure is some random dream.
I take a glance to her empty side of the bed before picking up the phone. She's still not home yet.
I check the caller ID. It is Nino.
"Yeah, Nino?" I clear my throat, throwing my head back to the pillow still closing my eyes.
I had a long day of a CM shoot today and just came home 3 hours ago.
"Jun-pon, can you come down?" I hear Nino's asking from the other side of the phone. "I'm downstairs and need your help."
I blink, "You're here?"
"Yeah in front of your building. Rei-chan has fallen asleep on the way, she's too wasted and I can't wake her up. I've managed to bring her to the porch but I have no energy to bring her upstairs," he explains flatly.
I sigh. She has told me she has a wrap party for the Garasu the Movie. But she usually is not a very heavy drinker. I know I should have come along, but my schedule didn't allow me to do so.
"I'll be right down," I mutter to the phone before hanging up, without even trying to cover up my annoyed tone.
---
Nino almost fell asleep himself on the porch when I let myself out of the apartment's lobby. Right next to him, leaning on his shoulder, Rei is still sleeping like a baby. She snores lightly. I can't keep myself from letting out a small smile. She must have been exhausted.
"We were playing a drinking game and she keeps losing. I am sorry that I am too good in psychological games," Nino mutters lazily, half-asleep. He definitely had a good share of alcohol as well.
"It's fine," I sigh to him, "Thanks for bringing her back here."
I put Rei's arms around my shoulders and pull her up on my back.
"You need help?" He asks.
"I can take her. Daily stuff," I slyly smile. "But you can open doors for me," and I gave him my key.
Nino obliges as I bring Rei on my back upstairs.
I let Nino throws himself to the sofa as I bring Rei inside the bedroom. I change her clothes to pajamas and put her on her side of the bed. She doesn't even bulge and just hug her pillow with a satisfied smile. I put a blanket over her shoulders before finally heading outside. Bringing my extra pillows, blanket and some pajamas for Nino.
I put them on a chair before slapping Nino's legs off the sofa.
"Get up!"
He obliges lazily and let me fix the sofabed for him. Putting the pillows and everything else on top when I am done.
"Thanks for letting me stay," He throws himself to the sofabed a second after. "It's already a miracle that I managed to drive here safely."
I open my wine cellar and get one bottle out, "That's dangerous. You should have called me earlier, I could pick you guys up."
For some reasons, I don't feel like sleeping anymore. Not after a dream like that.
"You want some wine?"
"Sure.."
I pour a generous amount of wine for both of us.
"So Garasu is finally over," I break the silence. We are now both sitting on the sofa bed, side by side, drinking our wine.
"Yeah. Finally!" Nino throws back his head and stare to the ceilings.
"I thought you enjoyed that shoot.."
"I did. Working with Rei-chan is awesome. Director is awesome. But the staff is a bit on the annoying side," He says curtly.
"Still gossiping about you and Rei?"
"Yeah.."
Nino takes a good look of my flat expression.
"Ne, Jun-pon.."
"Hai.."
"You are never jealous with me, aren't you?"
"No.." I immediately answer, a bit too quickly.
Silence.. He scoffs whilst giving me a knowing look.
"Okay, I lied. Sometimes I do," I took another sip of my wine, stealing a glance to his side of the bed and give him a small smirk.
A smirk that he gladly returns, "I am always jealous of you ever since you went out with her."
"But you don't feel anything for her anymore, do you?" I raise an eyebrow, looking into his eyes sharply.
"Yes.. And no..," He changes his tone as he notice my glare to him, "Okay, sometimes it crosses my mind. But not like the way it used to be. Either way I just think you are lucky to have someone like her."
"I am," I boast to him proudly. Giving him a gentle punch on his shoulder.
"Still, I think she chose right, though," He adds finally as I pour him another glass. "Having been working with her, I kinda get that she would be wrong for me. I mean, we wouldn't work out, if she did choose me. I am very straightforward myself, she is very expressive. It is just too much of the similar traits.."
I just nod as I hold the full glass of wine in my hand. The guy really talks a lot if he doesn't have a DS to play with.
And Nino still has lots to say, "Whilst she is perfect for a stoic guy like you. She has that perfectionist side as well to fit your liking, but playful and expressive enough to give a good balance. Yet, she's too sensitive at times for her own good. And you have such a sharp tongue."
"Look who's talking," I scoff.
"Good thing yours is not as sharp as mine," He grins wide.
"You're overanalyzing, Neen, you should mind your own business," I return his grin. "Find a girl for yourself to overanalyze."
"But what bugs me the most is that she actually chose you over me," Nino lets out an exasperated sigh, completely ignoring me. I laugh at that.
"That's because I am better looking than you. And way sexier," I state calmly, drying all the wine from the glass.
"But I am still smarter. Funnier. And better actor," He dries his wine as well and laughing it off together with me.
That night, I fell asleep on Nino's bedside instead of hers.
---
But Nino made a good point last night.
As I cook the hangovered Garasu's leading actor and actress their breakfast, both of them act like two kids who wouldn't get along if I, the mom, was not present.
They fight over the TV, Nino wants to play video games but Rei wants to watch a movie. They fight over what breakfast I should cook for them. And they argue over whose fault it is last night that they got too drunk to function.
I know that Nino was just teasing her, but I can see she really takes it to the heart when she pouts.
I stare at the soup that I was cooking. I also have my own share of arguments with her. Especially since about a year ago when she hardly ever comes home to her apartment anymore.
Not that I will ever let her.
Although, in terms of trivial matters like how she doesn't put things in order and where it should be, or me overcriticizing her, I guess we let it slide easily. Making up as soon as we miss each other, which is not very long after.
Nino missed out one thing that's the reason of us ever got together and still together in the first place.
Our intensity.
I smile to the boiling soup.
"See? You were so wasted last night, Jun-pon didn't get his share as a man. Now he is daydreaming bout it," Nino smirks as he throws a glance at me in the midst of his gaming on my TV, "Just take a look at that perverted smile!"
"The one who said that 'I can last for an hour if I want to last night' is calling another person a pervert?" She mockingly snaps at him. I give her a smile as she is defending me.
"Eh? An hour?"
"You know.." she gives me a knowing look. Mouthing the bad wording.
I practically laugh out loud at that.
"The guy can't barely take your weight and bring you upstairs all by himself!"
"OI!" Nino yells out his protest, pausing his game.
He turns to us and smirk proudly, "You'll never know, Jun-pon, you'll never know."
"Yeah, right."
---
Preparation for concerts have always been my favorite amongst other works that we do. I can feel my tension increases as we are now entering that time of the year. It is a busy time of the year which means I get to see Rei less, unfortunately. In fact, I haven't seen her much lately since a week ago when Nino slept over. Only at nights when I came home she's already asleep, and when she wakes up I have left already either for a shoot or rehearsal.
From: Rei
Why didn't you wake me up before you go?!
To: Rei
Didn't have the heart.
It is also easier for me to fight the urge this way :p
From: Rei
What urge?
To: Rei
To show you that I am the one who can last an hour.
From: Rei
I already know, Jun :) No need to show off.
I actually kinda need to talk to you about work.
To: Rei
Okay. We'll talk tonight.
Then after we talk, I'll still show you.
Multiple times :)
From: Rei
Wake me up no matter how late it is, okay?
I smile at her last message. She seems bothered about work, I've noticed that. She has been receiving several offers and seems to have a hard time deciding which one to choose. She looks so preoccupied for the past week, I have refrained myself from asking because I know that if she ever needs my help, she will tell me so.
"Good news?" Sho-kun glances at me as we are strolling across the arena of Kokuritsu, catching me smiling at my cellphone.
I put my cellphone back to my pocket, "Nah, it's just Rei."
Nino sits right behind me, fixing his baseball cap to protect his white skin from the sun, "That means he just receive a perverted message."
I blush at that.
"See? I was right," Nino points one chubby finger to my face.
I slap that finger as an answer.
Aiba-chan sits right beside Nino, "But I really admire you, Matsujun. Long distance relationship will be hard, ne? I don't think I could deal with that if I were you. But it is such a great achievement for her."
"Long distance?" I tilt my head, turn to him and furrow my eyebrows. Just in time to catch Nino nudges Aiba-chan's ribs, hard.
"What?"
"Damn it, Aiba-chan!" Nino hisses.
"What is it, guys?" I try to not raise my voice. But I am starting to lose my patience.
"I think Aiba-chan was talking about Rei-chan's debut in Hollywood," Sho-kun clears his throat. He gives me this confused look. "You didn't know, yet?"
I give each of them a look, the one to Nino is longer than the others, "How come ALL OF YOU know?"
Aiba-chan looks away. And so is Sho-kun. And so is Riida.
"I told them," Nino mutters softly. "Her manager told her at Garasu's set a couple of weeks ago. I figured she wanted to tell you herself."
"Well, she didn't!" I snap at him.
Why didn't you tell me, Rei?
That was the first thought that rises on my mind. But that's a selfish thought. This is a wonderful news. Hollywood, ne? I should be proud of her. I should take her to some fancy dinner and get her a gift.
Nino just stare at the solid concrete underneath him as I mumble my thoughts, "So you mean she would be overseas for a couple of months right.. That's not long distance.."
"One year and a half," Nino cuts me mid-sentence, looking straight at me in the eye. "That's the minimum. It is some epic trilogy history movie... The contract says up to 2 years."
No one said anything for a while.
I can only hear the wind blows in my ear. I turn my face away from them, put my hands inside my pockets and enjoy the view of the arena for a while. The tall buildings that surround us. The high cloudy grey sky above grumbles as if wanting to tell me something.
I don't know what to feel. I don't know what to say.
Another question pops up, "Did she already sign it?"
I realize that my voice cracks up a bit.
"Not that I know of. I don't know," Nino answers.
"Oh.."
"Jun-kun.. I am sorry. I shouldn't be the one who told you this," Nino apologizes in a low voice.
"Sorry, Matsujun. I thought you already knew," Aiba-chan also apologizes.
I turn to them and nod.
"I'll.. I'll be back, alright?" I finally say before walking away from them.
I feel 4 pairs of eyes are on my back all the time. But I didn't turn back. I keep walking away.
Walking away from the arena. Walking away from the scene we were looking at. From the view. The sky gets darker and grumbles one more time, drowning the sounds of my footsteps on the solid ground.
With such feeling no words can ever be able to describe.
Continue to Chapter 21
CHAPTER 20
「Some Random Dream」
I was dreaming some random dream. We were somewhere around a field of grass, just like one of the locations of Boku wa Imoto ni Koi o Suru.
By we in my dream, it means me and Riida. Not me and Eikura Nana-chan. In the middle of the night. We were playing cards as we drink our sake right in front of each other, crossing our legs on the grassy soil.
What the hell are we doing there? The me in my dream couldn't care any less. Riida was showing me a magic trick. He is just as good as Nino in this dream. Even better. If it is Nino, you've expected it so. But when Riida gets to do it, he surprises you more.
And then she appears. Smiling.
"Jun-kun!!" she calls and runs to me from the other side of the field.
"Riida!" Someone else's voice calls out. A familiar one. A male. But Riida doesn't even bulge. As if he doesn't hear him at all.
And along with her, there comes Nino. Right behind her. Holding one of her hand. But the me in my dream just smiles.
"Here comes the newlyweds," I heard the me in my dream says so to Riida. Riida just look at the me in my dream with an expression I cannot understand. I cannot bare.
And then my phone rings. Loud.
Completely taking me away from that world and bringing me back to reality. To my room. To my bed.
Okay. Now that sure is some random dream.
I take a glance to her empty side of the bed before picking up the phone. She's still not home yet.
I check the caller ID. It is Nino.
"Yeah, Nino?" I clear my throat, throwing my head back to the pillow still closing my eyes.
I had a long day of a CM shoot today and just came home 3 hours ago.
"Jun-pon, can you come down?" I hear Nino's asking from the other side of the phone. "I'm downstairs and need your help."
I blink, "You're here?"
"Yeah in front of your building. Rei-chan has fallen asleep on the way, she's too wasted and I can't wake her up. I've managed to bring her to the porch but I have no energy to bring her upstairs," he explains flatly.
I sigh. She has told me she has a wrap party for the Garasu the Movie. But she usually is not a very heavy drinker. I know I should have come along, but my schedule didn't allow me to do so.
"I'll be right down," I mutter to the phone before hanging up, without even trying to cover up my annoyed tone.
---
Nino almost fell asleep himself on the porch when I let myself out of the apartment's lobby. Right next to him, leaning on his shoulder, Rei is still sleeping like a baby. She snores lightly. I can't keep myself from letting out a small smile. She must have been exhausted.
"We were playing a drinking game and she keeps losing. I am sorry that I am too good in psychological games," Nino mutters lazily, half-asleep. He definitely had a good share of alcohol as well.
"It's fine," I sigh to him, "Thanks for bringing her back here."
I put Rei's arms around my shoulders and pull her up on my back.
"You need help?" He asks.
"I can take her. Daily stuff," I slyly smile. "But you can open doors for me," and I gave him my key.
Nino obliges as I bring Rei on my back upstairs.
I let Nino throws himself to the sofa as I bring Rei inside the bedroom. I change her clothes to pajamas and put her on her side of the bed. She doesn't even bulge and just hug her pillow with a satisfied smile. I put a blanket over her shoulders before finally heading outside. Bringing my extra pillows, blanket and some pajamas for Nino.
I put them on a chair before slapping Nino's legs off the sofa.
"Get up!"
He obliges lazily and let me fix the sofabed for him. Putting the pillows and everything else on top when I am done.
"Thanks for letting me stay," He throws himself to the sofabed a second after. "It's already a miracle that I managed to drive here safely."
I open my wine cellar and get one bottle out, "That's dangerous. You should have called me earlier, I could pick you guys up."
For some reasons, I don't feel like sleeping anymore. Not after a dream like that.
"You want some wine?"
"Sure.."
I pour a generous amount of wine for both of us.
"So Garasu is finally over," I break the silence. We are now both sitting on the sofa bed, side by side, drinking our wine.
"Yeah. Finally!" Nino throws back his head and stare to the ceilings.
"I thought you enjoyed that shoot.."
"I did. Working with Rei-chan is awesome. Director is awesome. But the staff is a bit on the annoying side," He says curtly.
"Still gossiping about you and Rei?"
"Yeah.."
Nino takes a good look of my flat expression.
"Ne, Jun-pon.."
"Hai.."
"You are never jealous with me, aren't you?"
"No.." I immediately answer, a bit too quickly.
Silence.. He scoffs whilst giving me a knowing look.
"Okay, I lied. Sometimes I do," I took another sip of my wine, stealing a glance to his side of the bed and give him a small smirk.
A smirk that he gladly returns, "I am always jealous of you ever since you went out with her."
"But you don't feel anything for her anymore, do you?" I raise an eyebrow, looking into his eyes sharply.
"Yes.. And no..," He changes his tone as he notice my glare to him, "Okay, sometimes it crosses my mind. But not like the way it used to be. Either way I just think you are lucky to have someone like her."
"I am," I boast to him proudly. Giving him a gentle punch on his shoulder.
"Still, I think she chose right, though," He adds finally as I pour him another glass. "Having been working with her, I kinda get that she would be wrong for me. I mean, we wouldn't work out, if she did choose me. I am very straightforward myself, she is very expressive. It is just too much of the similar traits.."
I just nod as I hold the full glass of wine in my hand. The guy really talks a lot if he doesn't have a DS to play with.
And Nino still has lots to say, "Whilst she is perfect for a stoic guy like you. She has that perfectionist side as well to fit your liking, but playful and expressive enough to give a good balance. Yet, she's too sensitive at times for her own good. And you have such a sharp tongue."
"Look who's talking," I scoff.
"Good thing yours is not as sharp as mine," He grins wide.
"You're overanalyzing, Neen, you should mind your own business," I return his grin. "Find a girl for yourself to overanalyze."
"But what bugs me the most is that she actually chose you over me," Nino lets out an exasperated sigh, completely ignoring me. I laugh at that.
"That's because I am better looking than you. And way sexier," I state calmly, drying all the wine from the glass.
"But I am still smarter. Funnier. And better actor," He dries his wine as well and laughing it off together with me.
That night, I fell asleep on Nino's bedside instead of hers.
---
But Nino made a good point last night.
As I cook the hangovered Garasu's leading actor and actress their breakfast, both of them act like two kids who wouldn't get along if I, the mom, was not present.
They fight over the TV, Nino wants to play video games but Rei wants to watch a movie. They fight over what breakfast I should cook for them. And they argue over whose fault it is last night that they got too drunk to function.
I know that Nino was just teasing her, but I can see she really takes it to the heart when she pouts.
I stare at the soup that I was cooking. I also have my own share of arguments with her. Especially since about a year ago when she hardly ever comes home to her apartment anymore.
Not that I will ever let her.
Although, in terms of trivial matters like how she doesn't put things in order and where it should be, or me overcriticizing her, I guess we let it slide easily. Making up as soon as we miss each other, which is not very long after.
Nino missed out one thing that's the reason of us ever got together and still together in the first place.
Our intensity.
I smile to the boiling soup.
"See? You were so wasted last night, Jun-pon didn't get his share as a man. Now he is daydreaming bout it," Nino smirks as he throws a glance at me in the midst of his gaming on my TV, "Just take a look at that perverted smile!"
"The one who said that 'I can last for an hour if I want to last night' is calling another person a pervert?" She mockingly snaps at him. I give her a smile as she is defending me.
"Eh? An hour?"
"You know.." she gives me a knowing look. Mouthing the bad wording.
I practically laugh out loud at that.
"The guy can't barely take your weight and bring you upstairs all by himself!"
"OI!" Nino yells out his protest, pausing his game.
He turns to us and smirk proudly, "You'll never know, Jun-pon, you'll never know."
"Yeah, right."
---
Preparation for concerts have always been my favorite amongst other works that we do. I can feel my tension increases as we are now entering that time of the year. It is a busy time of the year which means I get to see Rei less, unfortunately. In fact, I haven't seen her much lately since a week ago when Nino slept over. Only at nights when I came home she's already asleep, and when she wakes up I have left already either for a shoot or rehearsal.
From: Rei
Why didn't you wake me up before you go?!
To: Rei
Didn't have the heart.
It is also easier for me to fight the urge this way :p
From: Rei
What urge?
To: Rei
To show you that I am the one who can last an hour.
From: Rei
I already know, Jun :) No need to show off.
I actually kinda need to talk to you about work.
To: Rei
Okay. We'll talk tonight.
Then after we talk, I'll still show you.
Multiple times :)
From: Rei
Wake me up no matter how late it is, okay?
I smile at her last message. She seems bothered about work, I've noticed that. She has been receiving several offers and seems to have a hard time deciding which one to choose. She looks so preoccupied for the past week, I have refrained myself from asking because I know that if she ever needs my help, she will tell me so.
"Good news?" Sho-kun glances at me as we are strolling across the arena of Kokuritsu, catching me smiling at my cellphone.
I put my cellphone back to my pocket, "Nah, it's just Rei."
Nino sits right behind me, fixing his baseball cap to protect his white skin from the sun, "That means he just receive a perverted message."
I blush at that.
"See? I was right," Nino points one chubby finger to my face.
I slap that finger as an answer.
Aiba-chan sits right beside Nino, "But I really admire you, Matsujun. Long distance relationship will be hard, ne? I don't think I could deal with that if I were you. But it is such a great achievement for her."
"Long distance?" I tilt my head, turn to him and furrow my eyebrows. Just in time to catch Nino nudges Aiba-chan's ribs, hard.
"What?"
"Damn it, Aiba-chan!" Nino hisses.
"What is it, guys?" I try to not raise my voice. But I am starting to lose my patience.
"I think Aiba-chan was talking about Rei-chan's debut in Hollywood," Sho-kun clears his throat. He gives me this confused look. "You didn't know, yet?"
I give each of them a look, the one to Nino is longer than the others, "How come ALL OF YOU know?"
Aiba-chan looks away. And so is Sho-kun. And so is Riida.
"I told them," Nino mutters softly. "Her manager told her at Garasu's set a couple of weeks ago. I figured she wanted to tell you herself."
"Well, she didn't!" I snap at him.
Why didn't you tell me, Rei?
That was the first thought that rises on my mind. But that's a selfish thought. This is a wonderful news. Hollywood, ne? I should be proud of her. I should take her to some fancy dinner and get her a gift.
Nino just stare at the solid concrete underneath him as I mumble my thoughts, "So you mean she would be overseas for a couple of months right.. That's not long distance.."
"One year and a half," Nino cuts me mid-sentence, looking straight at me in the eye. "That's the minimum. It is some epic trilogy history movie... The contract says up to 2 years."
No one said anything for a while.
I can only hear the wind blows in my ear. I turn my face away from them, put my hands inside my pockets and enjoy the view of the arena for a while. The tall buildings that surround us. The high cloudy grey sky above grumbles as if wanting to tell me something.
I don't know what to feel. I don't know what to say.
Another question pops up, "Did she already sign it?"
I realize that my voice cracks up a bit.
"Not that I know of. I don't know," Nino answers.
"Oh.."
"Jun-kun.. I am sorry. I shouldn't be the one who told you this," Nino apologizes in a low voice.
"Sorry, Matsujun. I thought you already knew," Aiba-chan also apologizes.
I turn to them and nod.
"I'll.. I'll be back, alright?" I finally say before walking away from them.
I feel 4 pairs of eyes are on my back all the time. But I didn't turn back. I keep walking away.
Walking away from the arena. Walking away from the scene we were looking at. From the view. The sky gets darker and grumbles one more time, drowning the sounds of my footsteps on the solid ground.
With such feeling no words can ever be able to describe.
Continue to Chapter 21