Maelström
Chapter 7
They stood there watching Earth for a few seconds, without saying a word, without moving. Just there....
Disclaimer: I don’t own Robotech or any of it’s characters. This fic was written for entertainment purposes only. No infringement is intended.
Author’s note: This is a Roy and Lisa fanfic, you are warned. If you don’t want to read this please don’t. I wrote this because I have always think that Roy is an awesome character and that he and Lisa will make a wonderful couple if it weren't for Claudia. In order for this fic to work Roy never died in the episode “Farwell Big Brother”
Reviews: I love reviews, they are what keeps me writing and is the only way I have to know if you like it or not this fic. So please try to send one even if it just one word.
To: Carla, thanks for helping me to develop this idea and for giving me the courage to write this.To Dwayne for being my beta again, without you I don't know what I'll do and to Feña.
Enjoy.....
Maelström
Chapter 7
“Nothing but the sky”
Lisa was seated on the observation deck of the Satellite. It was a sort of dome with a beautiful garden that looked almost the same as a park she used to visit with her mom when they were in London. The trees with their brown leaves lit up with soft lights, the small stream, the stars outside the huge crystal dome and of course the view of Earth in the distance made this place one of Lisa's favorites. She had gone there as often as she could, just to look outside and think. She was going to miss coming here at night.
She looked at the leaves of a neaby tree, paying special attention to the different shades of yellow and brown that seemed to glow thanks to the lights set beneath them. She couldn't help breathing a sigh, she had done a lot of thinking in the last few days, mostly about what she wanted for her life now. If Roy's words were true, and deep down in her heart she knew they were, Claudia had given her life to save her, not only because she was a soldier, but because Claudia cared about her and most importantly because she wanted her to be happy. And that was what she wanted now, to be happy; she felt she owed Claudia that.
The only problem was trying to figure out what made her truly happy. She loved her job, it had made her happy during the last few years, but she had always felt something was missing. Then there was Rick -she knew she could be happy with him, in fact when they were alone, in private, without the pressure of being Captain Hayes and Commander Hunter they were truly happy together. But she had always wanted something more than his friendship. She loved him but had been to afraid to say what she truly felt for fear of losing him.
Enough with that, she thought; life is too short. She was tired of being afraid. She knew that her relationship with Rick wouldn't change unless she did something, she could not remain seated waiting for him to do something. If he hadn't been able to catch all the signals she had given to him during the last couple of years then there was no hope in thinking he might do it now. So, in the last interplanetary call they had shared she had told him that they should do something once she got back to Earth and he had sounded excited by the idea. He even said that he had missed her a lot and that he was counting the hours to see her again.
Lisa sighed again and smiled a bittersweet smile. Yes things were clearer in her life now and that made her happy. But there was this part of her that stopped her from smiling completely. She still missed her friend; she knew she would never stop missing her like she also knew she would never stop thanking her for saving her life.
Finally she stood up as it was late and her flight back to Earth was scheduled early in the morning. She started to walk towards the gigantic windows of the dome. She wanted to see Earth one last time. She rested her weight against the banister and fixed her gaze on the blue planet, trying to capture every detail of it. When she was sure she had memorized it, she looked around trying this time to capture all the details of the gardens that she had grown to love and then she smiled and started to walk again.
“Are we going to make this a habit?” Lisa asked when she was at Roy's side.
“What?”
“This thing of jumping at each other at night?” Lisa said with a smile.
“Red light Captain!” Roy said in fake shock.
“I didn't mean it like that,” Lisa protested.
“You know my room is close,” he said getting closer to her seductively. Lisa just raised an eyebrow.
“What? You were the one who said something about jumping at each other at night,” Roy said with a grin.
“You are hopeless you know that, don't you?” Lisa asked rolling her eyes.
“It's part of my charm,” Roy said with a smile, Lisa just rolled her eyes again.
“What brought you here?” Roy asked after a while.
“I love this place. This small park is just beautiful, plus I don't think you can beat the view,” Lisa said looking at Earth again.
“That's true,” Roy said looking at Earth too.
“Besides I don't get to do this often back on Earth,” Lisa said and Roy gave her a quizzical look. “Go out and take a walk in the park at night.”
“I know, we don't seem to enjoy Earth much,” Roy said and Lisa just nodded and looked away again.
“It's weird being here, somehow it reminds me of the early days in SDF-1, when it was ours you know,” Roy said leaning against the banister.
“Ours?”
“You know, before the civilians got on board.”
“You feel that way too?”
“Of course. I mean that ship was ours, I was amongst the first people to set foot in it. We knew exactly what was around every corner of the ship. Especially you.”
“Me?”
“I bet you know how many screws were on door C of level 12 in section delta.”
“I don't...” Lisa was saying but Roy gave her an inquisitive look. “I really don't.”
“I thought you knew,” Roy said and gave a sigh. “There were twelve screws, in case you were wondering.”
“No, there were only eleven and two hermetic seals,” Lisa said and regretted her words immediately after seeing Roy’s
triumphant expression.
“I knew you knew it!” he said with a huge grin in his face.
“I just... almost every door in the entire section had the same number of screws!” Lisa said in her defense.
“But of course, and it's common knowledge how many screws a door has,” Roy said sarcastically.
“You knew! You only said twelve to trick me, didn't you?”
“Like I said I was among the first people to set foot on it, the SDF-1 was like my baby.”
“I know.”
“And everything changed so much when the civilians came aboard.”
“They practically took control of the ship.”
“And we became the babysitters of all of them.”
“All the space they used could have been arranged to... I don't know, be more hangars.”
“True but it was also nice to have a place to hang out and not feel like you were on a carrier all the time.”
“You're right about that. Although I never served on a carrier I remember going to visit my father and he always said that only by being in his quarters talking to me he feel as though he were away from the carrier.”
“I bet he did, it's nice to have some distraction from time to time.”
“They also helped us to keep in mind why we were fighting.”
“It would have been much easier to give up when we were at the other side of side of the universe if we didn't have had them on board,” Roy said thoughtfully.
“Yes it would,” Lisa said with understanding.
“So I guess all in all, it wasn't that bad to have them on board.”
“No it wasn't. Especially because of the food, can you imagine eating from the cafeteria the entire time it took us to get back?” Lisa said and Roy immediately made a grimace.
“All that greasy food, ick,” Roy said.
“Right, I forgot you are Mister Organic Food.”
“I don't eat just organic food! I do enjoy a good steak and a barbecue,” Roy said and Lisa just smiled. “I do! The fact that I don't enjoy eating greasy hamburgers and pizza like you do, doesn't make me a vegetarian.”
“I don't eat just hamburgers and pizza!” Lisa protested.
“I forgot French fries and all the chocolate and ice cream,” Roy said and Lisa just gave him an angry look.
“And yet I'm not the one who runs 10 miles every mornings to stay in shape,” she replied to him.
“I don't run all mornings! And besides I do it because I like it.”
“Really? Because I could have sworn that you said once that you hated physical exercise.”
“Well darling there are physical exercises and then there are physical exercises,” Roy said emphasizing the last words with a sexy grin making Lisa roll her eyes.
“You're unbelievable. Seriously, is there anything that you do not relate to sex?”
“Mmm... nope,” he said smiling brightly and both of them laughed openly.
“It's been a while since I have laughed like that,” Lisa said finally.
“Me too,” Roy said making a pause to then add. “You do look happy, I must say.”
“I do? Well it’s probably because we are going back home.”
“Right, it’sprobably because of that,” he said incredulously.
“What?”
“I think it has more to do with my little brother.”
“Your little brother?” Lisa said raising an eyebrow. “So he is your little brother again?”
“Mmm...” Roy said thoughtfully, looking away from her. “He just doesn't know yet.”
Lisa just smiled and then added. “I'm glad to hear things are better between the two of you, even if he doesn't know.”
“It's weird to be angry at him,” Roy said and made a pause. “I've always cared and loved him, but I just couldn't help feeling angry at him.”
“I know, I was angry at him too. I felt like there was something he could have done. You know?”
“Me too, but I guess in the end I just needed to blame someone and he was the better option I had.”
“It was easy to blame him, I even thought about court-martialing him,” Lisa confessed.
“You did?” Roy asked surprised.
“Yes,” Lisa said and looked at her hands in shame. “I checked all the video tapes of the combat, all the recordings, everything I could find about what happen that day. I checked everything trying to find something that proved I was right, that he was somehow responsible for what had happened.” She clenched her hands. “I found nothing. I never gave him a direct order to send a man to help us and his orders where clear. He was ordered to rescue Minmei at all costs and that was what he did. When I asked him for help he was truly facing heavy fire and there was no way he could have known that Khyron's first line of defense was the strongest and most dangerous one and that after them there wasn't any real danger so he could have send one of his men. But I only know that because I saw the tapes of what happened later; in that moment there was no way he could have known that,” Lisa made a pause. “He made a good military choice. He did what he was ordered to do, rescue Minmei.”
Roy didn't say a word he just kept looking outside at Earth.
“After all that the only mistake I could find was mine. I failed as a strategist; I should have foreseen that we could have possibly been a target and should have put a squadron with us to protect us.”
“You were far away from the danger zone. There's no way you could have foreseen that,” Roy said frowning.
“But that's my job Roy, foreseening things that no one else sees. Being one step ahead of things. And I failed, I put everyone on that plane directly in the line of fire.”
“Lisa...” Roy said softly.
“If someone should be court-martialed for what happened it should be me. I made one bad decision after another that day,” Lisa's voice faltered slightly and she tried unsuccessfully to regain her normal voice. “And it cost the lives of three people. And I survived.”
The sound of her voice when she said the last words, made him ache inside. He wanted to say to her that it wasn't her fault either, but he knew it was going to be useless. She would always feel that it was her responsibility, that there was something she could have done to prevent what had happened and that she should have been the one who died there. He understood that feeling too well. He had been there many times, and no matter how much time passed he always felt that there was something he could have done to prevent the deaths of many of the pilots under his command. But worse than that was the feeling of guilt for surviving. Why did the ones with families and kids die while he, the one who had nothing to lose, always made it.
So he did the only thing he thought that could help her, he laid his right hand on top of her left hand and held it tightly, as if by doing that he was saying to her that he understood what she was going through and that it wasn't her fault.
Lisa felt his hand over hers and her first impulse was to take it away, but she didn't. Instead she looked at him out of the corner of her eye and saw that he had his eyes fixed on Earth. He wasn't looking at her as if he felt sorry for her, or telling her that she should stop blaming herself. He was just there, with her, and without saying a word she knew he understood her, that he had been there, where she was right now. She held his hand too.
They stood there watching Earth for a few seconds, without saying a word, without moving. Just there, until a cleaning robot took them out of their thoughts.
“Well I better leave, tomorrow is going to be a long day,” Lisa said finally taking her hand away from Roy's.
“Right, we have a meeting with the ever so lovely Maistroff,” Roy said with a grimace.
“Yes, I really can't wait for it!” Lisa said in fake enthusiasm.
“I think I’d prefer having a lobotomy instead of hearing that pompous son...” Roy was saying when Lisa interrupted him.
“And yet he is still our superior,” Lisa said crossing her arms over her chest.
“Don't tell me you have never thought about punching him in the face?”
“The thought has crossed my mind,” Lisa said and then added, “more than once.”
“I think that's the only thing my brain thinks when I see him.”
“You have a brain? And it thinks?” Lisa said teasing him.
“Ha-ha,” Roy said faking a laugh. “Very funny, really.”
“See you tomorrow Roy,” Lisa said still smiling and started to walk away.
“You're next on my list Hayes, just behind Maistroff,” Roy teased her back.
“Ohh!” Lisa said pretending his words had hurt her. “And I was about to clear you for flying!”
“You’re on my other list, the list of people I love. You know you are my favorite flight operator.”
“Yeah right, I bet you said that to all your flight operators.”
“Of course not, you are the only one,” he said and winked at her.
“Really?”
“Really, promise!” Roy said with his most innocent face making Lisa sigh while shaking her head.
“You'll fly the new VT to Earth.”
“Really?” Roy said and his eyes where bright.
“Yes, we need to test it on Earth and I thought you'd like to flight it there.”
“Thanks!”
“Oh I didn't do it for you. It’s hard enough to have to listen Maistroff as it is, but to have to listen to him with a killer headache is worse than going to hell. And since your last attempt to land the shuttle practically resulted in a crash landing that left me and Sammie with a headache for two days, I thought it was better to keep you out of the shuttle,” she said with a smile.
“First of all it wasn't a crash landing, it was a hard landing,” Roy said and when he noticed Lisa's eyebrow starting to rise, he added. “And second I wasn't piloting the shuttle, I wasn't cleared for flying.”
“And you always follow the rules?”
“I live by the rules; actually the rules and regulations book of the RDF is always under my pillow.”
Lisa just laughed at his comment and started to walk again. “See you tomorrow, Roy.”
“See you tomorrow Lisa,” Roy said and watched her walk away, then turn and look out the window again, at Earth. It was time to get back to reality, to his empty and yet full of memories house: he just hope he could deal with it better this time.
To be continued....
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