in the morning when i wake
Forgive me LJ, for I have been absent. It has been 66 days since my last post.
Is there any excuse for disappearing like that? It's just... the longer I'd been away, the harder it seemed to come back. But I miss my journal. I miss my friends. I miss reading about what's going on with every one and whining about shit. Yeah, I've been busy, but so is everyone, so okay, not even attempting any more lame excuses.
What else? I've barely watched any of the last season of Supernatural. superwicked can tell you of my epic blow out after watching the first few episodes. I barely recognize the show or the characters any more, Dean pisses me off to no end and for now, I've kinda given up on it. Haven't read any fic or even looked at any stills/promos/candids of the boys in ages. Is it over for good? Only time will tell. Maybe I'll get lured back, but for now the romance is over.
Taking it's place right now are all things DOWNTON ABBEY! So obsessed with that show, it's not even remotely funny. Still haven't dared to read any fan fic yet... I don't want to be disappointed, I guess. So unless someone can recommend a good author or two, I'll stick to stealing icons and such for now. BUT OMG, BATES AND ANNA! LADY MARY!!!! Just... EPICCCC LOVEEEE!!!!
Haven't dared write anything for months now either. I'm afraid like a muscle that hasn't been used, that if I try, I'll discover it's atrophied and doesn't work any more. There are still some ideas haunting me, like that epic Winnie the Pooh AU that owns my soul, but I cringe when I think of all the research and plotting out it's gonna take, never mind the vast quantity of actual writing it'll take. Maybe I just have to sit my ass down and start. Even if it's just for me, who needs to know?
Right now RL is just wonderful and amazing and of the extreme happy making. So many things are happening, it's hard to keep up sometimes. I'll (hopefully) be going in for Lasek surgery on Wendesday, if they can replace the stolen part of the laser in time. Crime really sucks, btw. Then it'll be full steam ahead on planning the wedding, helping my mom getting my dress made and all that jazz. I'm actually really calm about all of it, I don't particularly care if it all goes wrong, as long as we can just make it to the church, that's all that matters. I still have that annoying habit of expecting it all to blow up in my face at any moment, but starting to make peace with the fact that this is real, that it's for good, and that he's not going anywhere. I never in my wildest dreams could've hoped to love and be loved this much. After all this time of thinking it wasn't meant for me, I can admit now that I want a family of my own and actually hope having one. Life is beautiful.
So that's me. I want to say I'll try and be better about being on LJ, but I won't lie. It might be another 66 days before I surface again, but in the meantime, it feels good to visit. ;)
Is there any excuse for disappearing like that? It's just... the longer I'd been away, the harder it seemed to come back. But I miss my journal. I miss my friends. I miss reading about what's going on with every one and whining about shit. Yeah, I've been busy, but so is everyone, so okay, not even attempting any more lame excuses.
What else? I've barely watched any of the last season of Supernatural. superwicked can tell you of my epic blow out after watching the first few episodes. I barely recognize the show or the characters any more, Dean pisses me off to no end and for now, I've kinda given up on it. Haven't read any fic or even looked at any stills/promos/candids of the boys in ages. Is it over for good? Only time will tell. Maybe I'll get lured back, but for now the romance is over.
Taking it's place right now are all things DOWNTON ABBEY! So obsessed with that show, it's not even remotely funny. Still haven't dared to read any fan fic yet... I don't want to be disappointed, I guess. So unless someone can recommend a good author or two, I'll stick to stealing icons and such for now. BUT OMG, BATES AND ANNA! LADY MARY!!!! Just... EPICCCC LOVEEEE!!!!
Haven't dared write anything for months now either. I'm afraid like a muscle that hasn't been used, that if I try, I'll discover it's atrophied and doesn't work any more. There are still some ideas haunting me, like that epic Winnie the Pooh AU that owns my soul, but I cringe when I think of all the research and plotting out it's gonna take, never mind the vast quantity of actual writing it'll take. Maybe I just have to sit my ass down and start. Even if it's just for me, who needs to know?
Right now RL is just wonderful and amazing and of the extreme happy making. So many things are happening, it's hard to keep up sometimes. I'll (hopefully) be going in for Lasek surgery on Wendesday, if they can replace the stolen part of the laser in time. Crime really sucks, btw. Then it'll be full steam ahead on planning the wedding, helping my mom getting my dress made and all that jazz. I'm actually really calm about all of it, I don't particularly care if it all goes wrong, as long as we can just make it to the church, that's all that matters. I still have that annoying habit of expecting it all to blow up in my face at any moment, but starting to make peace with the fact that this is real, that it's for good, and that he's not going anywhere. I never in my wildest dreams could've hoped to love and be loved this much. After all this time of thinking it wasn't meant for me, I can admit now that I want a family of my own and actually hope having one. Life is beautiful.
So that's me. I want to say I'll try and be better about being on LJ, but I won't lie. It might be another 66 days before I surface again, but in the meantime, it feels good to visit. ;)