Some Reasons to be Missed
Pairing: BangJae
Rated: M (this is the first smut I've written in months so I'm sorry but it was a jumping back in story for me)
Length: 8.9K
This is a BangJae/Pacific Rim crossover so if you have no clue at all what Pacific Rim is then you are gonna be hella lost. HERE is the Pacific Rim Wiki if you wanna search for more info. Basically the story is that massive skyscraper sized monsters are being let out from a portal under the sea bed and humans make their own giant robots to fight them. The pilots are joined telepathically.
*story title from HERE
Kaiju: monster
Ranger: pilots
Jaeger: robots (Youngjae built Jokomato)
Drift: what happens in a neural connection when the two Rangers are connected
With a shake of his head Yoo Youngjae eliminated the third Ranger wannabe from the group. After the fourth and then the fifth were also turned away for no other reason than he didn’t like them, his boss had finally had enough. With a sigh Himchan grabbed his arm and tugged him out of the room.
“We can’t afford to be so choosy, Youngjae. All of these men are good choices and you know it. Why are you being like this?”
He crossed his arms over his chest and narrowed his eyes at the taller man. “They aren’t good enough. Jokomato deserves the best.”
Himchan pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers as he tried to reason with the well-known stubborn scientist. “Youngjae, I know you’ve bonded with the Jaeger b-“
“Jokomato.”
His jaw clenching, Himchan nodded. “Yes, I know you’ve bonded with Jokomato, but we need to find Ranger’s for him. There was two Kaiju attacks in the last month and we have to have all of the available Jaeger’s out there fighting.”
Himchan was right, something that always burned Youngjae up inside. He didn’t like it when people disagreed with him. Mainly because it rarely ever happened. As the youngest scientist in the Kaiju Science division, he took pride in always presenting cold hard facts.
“I know Jokomato.” He felt defeated knowing his creation was just going to be handed off to two people who didn’t know it inside and out like he did. “I know how he ticks and what he’s thinking. I don’t want him to go to someone who isn’t worthy.”
“Do you really think I would let that happen, Youngjae?” Himchan’s loud commanding voice softened to a degree Youngjae had never heard before. It made him uncomfortable. “I won’t give Jokomato to anyone that I don’t think deserves him.”
He nodded and turned back to the remaining Ranger wannabe’s behind the glass door. “Alright then, who’s next?”
They took their post back up at the side of the room and watched Jongup bring two more men up who had scored compatibly on their tests. “Yongguk and Daehyun.”
The two men took their places on opposite sides of the mat with their hanbo’s held out defensively in front of them. Youngjae didn’t know how they could have possibly scored compatibly if their looks were any judge. One was taller with brown buzzed hair and a sly smile on his lips, body skinnier than it probably should have been but still holding on to some slight muscle. The other boy was shorter with light brown hair and frosted blonde tips, his clothes plain but obviously more expensive than anyone else’s in the room. They looked to have nothing in common so he was curious as to how their fight would go.
The smaller boy made the first move and any idiot could have seen it coming a mile away. He didn’t even try to feign his attack, just went straight for the other one who easily blocked it with a powerful slam of his hanbo into his chest.
“That all you got?” He asked in a surprisingly deep voice. “My little sister hits me better than that.”
This only proved to infuriate the other, his cheeks red at the embarrassment. He came back again, this time managing to land a hard hit on the side of the other’s waist earning him a snarl. “Does your sister do that?”
The time for play was over with both men giving it all they had, neither showing any finesse or grace in their fighting, something Youngjae was looking for. He didn’t want brutes in Joko. You had to find the right balance between strength and smarts. The strength to control the machine and the smarts to know the right way to do things.
These two didn’t have that.
“Enough.” He shook his head at them. “What is wrong with all of you? None of you have been even a quarter worthy of my Jaeger. I’d have better luck shoving a monkey in there and letting it be a pilot!”
The taller man shook his hanbo at him in anger. “And who are you to decide who’s best for the missions? You’re nothing but an egghead in a white coat. You have no real Kaiju experience.”
Youngjae was stunned at the outburst. No one had ever yelled at him before. Even Himchan would speak slowly and calmly to him anytime he had an outburst. “Excuse me?” He replied in shock. “Who do you think you are?”
Jongup jumped up, oblivious smile on his lips. “His name’s Yongguk, Dr. Yoo!”
He took a deep breath so that he could force a smile at the tiny happy boy. “Thank you Jongup.” The kid may have been the best battle teacher they had but he sure was missing a few beams in his roof. “That information proved very helpful.”
Yongguk scoffed and crossed his arms across his chest. “All you nerds think you’re better than us Ranger’s. Just because you’re smarter and do the technical work you think all we do is jump into the Conn-Pod’s and have the easy parts.”
“And what do you know about piloting a Jaeger? Done some simulations and think you’re a master at it?”
Once again Jongup inserted himself in between the two, the bright smile now dipping at the corners a little. “Um, actually Yongguk is an experienced Ranger. He brought down two Kaiju in his old Jaeger, Shishi.”
The stats from the decommissioned Jaeger filled Youngjae’s mind. He knew one of the Ranger’s was named Bang Yongguk but he didn’t think this was the same Yongguk. Shishi had killed two Kaiju’s near the Sino-Russian border: Guaiwu and Yaomo Spear. It had been struck down off the coast of Beijing by Chui Tou and only one escape pod had been activated.
“Feel a little like an asshole now, don’t you?” Yongguk’s grin was friendly but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Good. I hate people like you.”
That was too far for Youngjae, his immature side coming to the surface. “If it wasn’t for people like me then dumb little boys like you wouldn’t stand a chance out there with the Kaiju. You’d be eaten alive just like everyone else.”
They didn’t notice Himchan and the rest of the trainee’s standing back and watching their verbal duel. Himchan’s eyes flicked back and forth between the two, gaze pondering and curious.
Yongguk took a few steps closer, putting himself right into Youngjae’s personal space, something he hated. “You’re all the same. Assholes. No wonder everyone warned us to stay away from you. They said you were the worst of them all.”
Okay, that stung a little. Youngjae knew he was hard to approach, but he never thought that everyone actually hated him. He preferred to think he was intimidating and people were in awe of him.
Guess not.
He jerked Yongguk’s hanbo out of his hands and impulsively slapped it against his shoulder, the weak hit not even causing him to flinch. “Why don’t you just go fuck yourself then?” He shouted, raining blows down on him while Yongguk easily reflected all of them. “There’s no way someone like you is getting anywhere near my Jaeger!”
Yongguk pushed into him again, his eyes now mere slits in his tense face. One hand snatched the wrist with the hanbo out of midair and jerked it behind Youngjae’s sweaty back, the other tangling painfully hard into his messy black hair and pulled so hard it brought stars to Youngjae’s eyes.
“Stop it!” He demanded trying to wiggle his way free, but Yongguk’s hold was so tight he only succeeded in making his hair more tangled in the hard fist.
“You scared?” Yongguk’s gaze was deadly and Youngjae finally realized that maybe he had misjudged the Ranger. What he thought was airheaded brawn was actually a tightly coiled body that was wound around him like a rattlesnake. “I could snap your neck with one twist.” He continued in a whisper.
“Okay that’s enough.” Himchan clapped his hands reminding the two about where they were, their arms quickly dropping from the other. “I’ve seen all I need to see. Everyone can head to the mess hall.”
Hissing at Yongguk’s purposeful shoulder bump as he walked past, Youngjae ran after his boss wondering why they weren’t letting the other trainees have a turn.
“I don’t need to see anyone else. We know who the most compatible two are now.”
Youngjae cocked his head to the side in confusion. Even though he graduated college at seventeen, he sometimes lacked a little on the uptake. “But Daehyun and Yongguk had nothing in common. There’s no way they could successfully Drift for very long.”
With a snort of laughter, Himchan turned to him incredulously. “It’s you and Yongguk, Youngjae. You two were more in sync than anyone I’ve come across in the last two years as Commander.”
His tray dropped to the ground with a loud clatter.
“You have got to be kidding me!”
---
He eyed Yongguk with thinly veiled contempt from across the small cabin inside Jokomato’s head. There was no way this would work. Even Yongguk looked pissed if the tightly crossed arms and deep furrow in his brow was any indication.
“You can’t expect me to go out into the fight with this idiot.”
“Hey!” Youngjae was in the top three percent of graduates of all time from his alma mater, there was no reason to lie about his intellect.
Yongguk threw his arms up in exasperation. “See! He doesn’t even know why I’m calling him an idiot! You have to put me with someone who has experience with the Kaiju, not some nerd who sits in his lab all day and can claim numerous simulation kills!”
Sixteen. He wasn’t going to say that out loud of course, but he had sixteen Kaiju simulation kills under his belt, thank you very much.
“Himchan, as much as I would enjoy proving this walking monkey wrong, it is true that I’ve never made an actual neural bridge with someone before. I made the Jaeger, but I haven’t ever been hooked up to it.”
Himchan shook his head and waved at the other doctor’s to continue setting the equipment. “You’ll learn as you go. This is the only option we have to get Jokomato out there. You and Yongguk are the only two that can hold their own against each other.”
Yongguk raised his hand. “Speaking of Jokomato, can I petition to have its name changed? To something a little less silly?”
Baring his teeth, Youngjae spun around to hiss his direction. “Oh but Shishi is manly?”
“Shishi is the name of a warrior lion, you little-“
“Boys!” Himchan raised his voice, turning him into the Commander and causing everyone in the room to freeze. “I’m in charge, I say who teams up with who, I say Jokomato sticks. Now if you two want to stop being pissy little children and want to, oh I don’t know, start saving the world, then I suggest you put on your big boy pants and let’s get working.” His small eyes narrowed at each of them in turn. “Do you two understand me?”
They nodded, both embarrassed at being chastised. “Yes sir.” They mumbled.
“Good.” The happy smile was back on his face as he clapped his hands and indicated he wanted the caps brought out. “You two go ahead and get hooked up and we’ll get the Drift started.”
They were silent as the tech’s helped buckle and snap all of their equipment into place, leaving them both attached to Jokomato at several points by long hose attachments. Youngjae could feel his heartbeat starting to flutter in his chest and he had to take short deep breaths to try and calm himself down.
“It’s going to feel like you’re falling.” Yongguk muttered under his breath. “Don’t fight the pull, if you fight it then we won’t connect.”
He didn’t answer, not wanting his unsolicited advice. Sixteen simulations had made him more than adequately prepared for the initial bridge. The only difference between them and this was that he wasn’t wearing the suit those other times. He was nervous just because this was something new and different and Yoo Youngjae did not adapt well to new and different. His life was neat and square and logical, just like him. Being a Ranger wasn’t ever in his plans because of the unpredictability and wildness to their work. Sitting quietly at a desk all day was more enjoyable to him.
“Don’t get distracted by your memories.” Yongguk continued, either not realizing Youngjae wasn’t paying attention or just not caring. “If you let them suck you in then I’ll have to chase after you.”
Right before the cap was placed over their heads, Yongguk let loose with one more piece of advice.
“And whatever you do, don’t let yourself fall into my memories.”
---
Baseball cards and watermelon and the smell of his grandfather’s cologne.
It’s so hot, why hasn’t mom turned the air conditioning on yet?
Scraped knees as Bae Ho pushed him into the ground after school again. The pinch on his cheek as his glasses broke apart.
Youngjae!
Youngjae, how many pairs of glasses are you going to break before you stop being so clumsy?
Youngjae get out of there!
“Neural bridge not yet connected.”
“Dr. Yoo’s blood pressure is rising. Should we disconnect?”
“No. Hold on for a little bit longer. Let’s see if Yongguk can pull him out of it.”
His head was killing him and his whole body felt like it was covered in mosquito bites, only a thousand times itchier. The sound of his mother’s dramas was loud in the background and he tried to whisper to her.
“Do you need more cream on your chicken pox, sweetheart? No, no don’t pull your mittens off YOUNGJAE LISTEN TO ME YOU’RE IN YOUR MEMORIES THIS IS NOT REAL WAKE U- they’re there to help you stop scratching them and making it worse.” Her cool hands were pressed against his hot forehead and he melted into the touch.
The slap was hard against his cheek and he gasped, eyes clenching shut tightly in pain.
“Open your eyes.” Yongguk’s voice was surprisingly gentle and warm, his palm caressing the pink spots he had made on his cheek. “Look at me. Look at only me. This isn’t real.”
“Yongguk?” His eyes fluttered open and he found himself in a flattened city, dust clouding the air around them and the sound of muffled screams in his ears. “Where are we?”
“Beijing.” Yongguk’s face was grim as he surveyed their surroundings. “This was the clearest memory I could pull you to. I got us away from the Kaiju but we need to get out of here.”
Youngjae knew where they were now. This was where Shishi was struck down by Chui Tou and Yongguk’s former partner was killed. He could hear the fight but couldn’t see it from the dark alley he was huddled in.
“I want to see.” Youngjae pulled away ignoring Yongguk’s warning growl. “I want to see you in action.”
He turned the corner and froze, the sight of the skyscraper sized Chui Tou barely three blocks away was so horrifying and so mesmerizing he couldn’t do anything but watch. This was the first Kaiju attack he had seen in person. The rest were on news channels that had to zoom in from miles away to get a decent shot.
But this…
“Neural bridge is halfway connected. Continue holding.”
“Please can we just leave.” Yongguk sounded strained and if Youngjae had been halfway thinking he would have realized that seeing Shishi go down in a pile of twisted metal and bite marks and watching his escape pod deploy while his partners stayed still might not be the best thing.
But Youngjae was transfixed on the fight between Chui Tou and Shishi and the almost graceful way the Jaeger moved as it deflected blow after blow even though it was clearly unevenly matched against the giant Kaiju. Chui Tou was only a Category Two, but what it lacked in size it made up for with its power. The giant knob over its forehead was how it had earned its name as it pounded bus sized holes into Shishi’s body.
Shishi was obviously on the end stage of the fight, its right arm hanging uselessly by its side and the left leg’s metal peeled back in waves and leaving it barely useable.
“My partner was already half dead.” Yongguk murmured, his own eyes unable to look away from the scene. Shishi fell to the ground, its head cratering the concrete. “I deployed as we were going down and woke up in a hospital three days later.” Youngjae’s hand found his, the skin clammy and shaking against his own. Youngjae could feel their minds completely joined now, the rest of Yongguk’s memories washing over him just as he knew his were invading Yongguk’s brain. “Let’s get to work.”
He came to in the Conn-Pod with a gasp, Yongguk already alert beside him and testing out Jokomato’s weapons holograms. Jokomato was in him and he was in Jokomato and oh god was his Jaeger breathing and-
“Calm down Youngjae.” Yongguk barely mouthed the words but they hit Youngjae’s ears like sirens. “Breathe at the same rate I’m breathing and concentrate on your movements.”
He finally took the other man’s advice and forced himself to look at the matter at hand. They were in Joko’s Conn-Pod and they were side by side and had to work together. “What do I do?” He managed to croak out, lifting his hand and watching Joko’s lift his also from the viewing screen.
“Let’s try to walk. Just let it flow naturally, both of us together.” Yongguk lifted up a leg and Youngjae followed until they had their rhythm’s matching and Jokomato was walking around the empty service area. “See, not too hard. Now let’s do some bigger movement. Have you learned any fighting techniques?”
He grimaced and shrugged. “Not really. I’ve seen Jongup teach a few of the trainees some things but I’ve never tried it out.”
“It will start to come to you pretty naturally once we’re face to face with a Kaiju.” Yongguk reassured him. “Your body will instinctually try to fight back from danger. We just need to learn how to do it together so Jokomato doesn’t get confused.”
Himchan’s face appeared on the holographic screen in front of them. “You’re doing great, Youngjae. Don’t worry about getting too in-depth with the fighting just yet. We just wanted to get you used to the controls and to see how well you and Yongguk work together.” His wink went unnoticed by the over-stimulated Youngjae as he tried to successfully turn from side to side in the restricting harnesses. “Just lead Jokomato back to the holding dock and rest up. You have a busy day tomorrow.”
Before he could ask what his Commander meant, the corner of the screen turned black.
Yongguk chuckled beside him as they slowly led Jokomato back to where they started at. “You and I are spending the day learning how to move and fight together.” His voice suddenly sounded in Youngjae’s head and it caused Jokomato to spasm as it walked. “Did you forget we could do this, too?”
It disconcerted him how Yongguk could go from complete asshole to caring co-pilot to tease in the matter of just a few minutes.
“It’s a gift.”
“Stay out of my head!” He screeched loudly once Jokomato was securely docked back into her holding station. “Talk to me normally!”
Once the tech’s had them unhooked from the harnesses and their uniforms off, Youngjae snatched the cap off his head and shoved it into Himchan’s hands as he stormed past. The sudden snap of his link with Yongguk shocked him with how empty he felt. He had heard that co-pilot’s stayed connected even when the neural bridge was broken but he had never realized just how strong it was. The need to stay close to Yongguk made him angry and he not for the first time wondered just what the hell he had gotten himself into.
---
“You look like hell.” Jongup slid into the seat across from him in the mess hall and noisily banged his topped out tray down onto the table.
He hummed what could have a response back as he rested his head on his arms, completely ignoring the food to the left of him. It had been more than twelve hours since he had been linked to Yongguk and he could still feel the other man in his mind. And he was pretty sure he was laughing at him. “Residual effects.”
Jongup nodded as he slathered his French fries in ketchup. “Yeah I heard that’s messy. I think they’re gonna do it again tomorrow night. Only gonna get worse.”
He slowly lifted his head and stared dryly at the annoying boy. “Gee Jongup. Thanks for the voice of support.”
“You’re welcome!”
Before he had even sat down Youngjae could feel Yongguk coming towards them. He could hear his heart beating and the hum under his breath in his ears. “Go away.” He muttered under his breath, knowing full well Yongguk would hear it.
“Hey kids.” Yongguk slammed his tray on the table so that the loud boom would cause Youngjae’s headache to worsen. “Big day today, eh? You up for it, Soft Pants?”
Youngjae growled and moved down a seat. How long would he feel connected to Yongguk? Was this a permanent side-effect? Wasn’t it supposed to wear off?
Yongguk’s memories still played in his mind like a never-ending movie reel. The loud childhood, the weeks spent in suspension for fighting in school, the death of his father and the toll it took on him. He could even recall with perfect clarity the last dying scream Yongguk’s partner had made in Shishi before it was dealt its death blow.
“Stop thinking about him.” Yongguk’s hands were gripping onto the table so tightly that his knuckles were white. “I can feel you.” He pushed himself away from the table and stormed out of the mess hall, leaving his full tray behind him.
“A word of advice?” Jongup reached over to snag the bowl of oatmeal Yongguk hadn’t even touched. “Don’t scroll through all of your partner’s memories right next to them. Not unless you want them to do the same back to you.” His small eyes narrowed at Youngjae as he calmly finished off Yongguk’s uneaten breakfast.
It wasn’t like he threw all of those memories at Yongguk on purpose, Youngjae reassured himself as he headed towards the practice room after barely eating his toast and orange juice. They were stuck in his head and he couldn’t escape from them. He now knew more about the angry warrior than he wanted to. All of his thoughts, all of the dreams he had before this stupid war started.
A sudden thought stopped him in his tracks and he slapped his hand over his head in anger. “God Youngjae, you’re so stupid sometimes!”
If he knew Yongguk’s biggest secrets, then that meant Yongguk knew his too.
---
“Go choose your hanbo.” Yongguk wasted no time with pleasantries, his eyes not even turning towards Youngjae when he entered the practice room. “Lay it on the floor beside you.”
He quietly followed orders, his brain still racing with the realization he had come to ten minutes earlier.
“You don’t want to go right into the hard fighting. You need to stretch your body out first and get your muscles warmed up.” Yongguk explained, settling himself onto the ground and easily placing his legs to the sides. “Try to reach towards your toes and go as low as you can.”
Youngjae could barely get his legs in a very slight v shape before his thighs burned and he had to give up. With a grunt of pain he threw his head forward and tried to slap at his feet.
A small chuckle sounded behind him before he felt Yongguk’s chest pressed warmly against his back, gently guiding his body down into the correct angle so that he could reach more comfortably. “You don’t want to force your body, Youngjae.” His own name was breathed hotly against his ear and Youngjae half wondered if Yongguk was doing this just to be an asshole. “You have to exercise the same way you would operate your Jaeger: calmly and rationally.”
He nodded and shrugged his shoulders until Yongguk got the hint and moved away. This time he followed the more experienced man’s instructions and leaned over carefully until the tips of his fingers were able to wrap over his toes.
“Better.” Yongguk praised, his own body stretched to unbelievable contortions next to him. “Now try to do some push-ups.”
Youngjae gulped, his head shaking back and forth. No way was he showing off how weak typing and sketching made his arms. “No, let’s not.” He pointed towards the hanbo sticks lying beside them. “Why don’t we get to the trying to fight part of the lesson?”
With a smirk Yongguk kicked his legs up and was on his feet in one motion, hand reaching down for Youngjae. “Alright, but you really should be more stretched out before I start in on you.” His words were accompanied by a knowing wink and a grin and Youngjae wanted to wipe that smug look right off of his face. “I don’t want to break you.” Now Yongguk was just toying with him.
He narrowed his eyes and pushed Yongguk’s hand away. “I’m a lot tougher than you think.” Youngjae sneered, holding the hanbo out in front of him. Even if he had no experience in it, surely he could hold his own. After all his instincts were usually pretty good.
A sharp whack to his hip had him groaning out in pain.
“Stay alert.” Yongguk ordered, circling around him. “Don’t ever let your prey see your attention drift.”
Their hanbo’s connected with a loud crack as Youngjae thought wrongly that he had the upper hand and took a shot.
Yongguk’s smile was predatory when Youngjae realized he was slowly being edged into the corner of the room, all the exits on the other side and nowhere to go.
“And most importantly,” Yongguk’s deep voice dropped even lower, his body so close that Youngjae could feel the heat from his skin. “Never let your opponent get the advantage.”
---
He was exhausted. Exhausted and sore and cranky and just in an all-around bad mood. At least he didn’t feel Yongguk in his head as much as he did yesterday, but they were supposed to Drift again in a few hours so it was a short reprieve.
They had spent more than eight hours together yesterday in training and Youngjae never wanted to see the smirk on those lips ever again. Today Himchan had insisted on even more exercises so that they would be worn out for the Drift test. He thought that if Youngjae had all the fight taken out of him that they would join easier.
Youngjae just saw it as an excuse for the crew to laugh at his out of shape attempts to bring Yongguk down.
None had proved successful thus far.
“You’ll never beat me.” Yongguk had taunted him earlier, his skin slicked and his chapped lips pulled up in the corner. “There’s nothing you can do that I won’t deflect. You’re worthless. You’re defenseless and you’re nothing more than a piece of trash on the bottom of my boots.”
He had to know his words were only proving to make Youngjae near maniacal. Even though the after effects of the Drift were fading they still pounded in the back of his head, especially when they were so close he could smell the sweat dripping down his neck.
“Shut up.” It wasn’t the best comeback of Youngjae’s grip on his hanbo grew a little tighter. Yongguk was pushing him to the breaking point and if he snapped there wasn’t going to be any stopping.
A childish pout was thrown his direction, Yongguk tapping his stick against Youngjae’s forehead in quick succession. “Aw, is JaeJae getting angry? You think the Kaiju are going to take it easy on you? You think they’ll sit there and patiently wait for you to decide what move you want to make next?” The hanbo poked against his shoulder until he angrily pushed it away. “Come on, show me what you’re really made of. Be a man.”
The next step was his last as Youngjae launched himself forward, his stick slamming Yongguk backwards several feet until he caught himself, a surprised look on his face. Once he realized he had finally gotten Youngjae’s natural instincts to react he threw himself back into the fight, the wooden sticks clanging against each other as they moved in step across the room together.
“That’s it, Youngjae!” Yongguk finally had a real smile on his face, his eyes lighting up with amusement as Youngjae managed to land a hard hit against his thigh. “Don’t think about anything but getting ahead of my movements.”
His back fingers stung as Yongguk whipped the hanbo across them. The Ranger’s glee at not having to hold back on the more inexperienced fighter was evident on his face as he replied to all of Youngjae’s attacks with even fiercer maneuvers of his own.
Yongguk was still the better fighter by far though and it didn’t take long before he had Youngjae pinned between his thighs on the ground, his stick held across Youngjae’s rapidly panting throat.
Once narrowed eyes were now wide and bright as he realized he had actually put up a pretty good fight. “I almost beat you.” He wheezed, his hands covering Yongguk’s as the Ranger was still forcing his hanbo down so tight it cut off his breath.
“I still won.” Yongguk’s voice was rough, his pupil’s blown wide from the fight.
“Barely.” He managed to push the stick off his Adam’s Apple and sucked in a much needed mouthful of air. “Next time I’ll be better.”
Yongguk tilted his head to the side curiously. “Already looking to next time, Dr. Yoo? Did I rile you up that much?”
Before Youngjae could answer the odd question he heard Jongup’s amused laughter in the doorway. Yongguk begrudgingly climbed off of him and held out a hand which Youngjae of course slapped away.
“You two seem to be working better together.” Jongup raised an eyebrow as he leaned against the wall. “I’d almost say you were in sync.”
“I wouldn’t go that far.” Youngjae muttered, grabbing his gym bag. “I’m going to go clean up before we start the neural bridge again.” He pushed past the other two and headed towards his quarters. “Stupid cocky bastard.”
---
His heartbeat was rising again as he gazed up at Jokomato from the viewing area near its belly. The Conn-Pod in its head was open and he could see Yongguk already inside being strapped into the harness. As if he knew he was being watched, his dark eyes glanced downwards and he had the audacity to wink towards him.
With a huff of annoyance he climbed the rest of the way up the stairs, completely ignoring Yongguk’s probing stare. “We ready to start?” He asked Himchan on the screen in front of them. Himchan nodded briefly before the tech’s helped him into his uniform and started attaching him to Joko.
“Youngjae?” Yongguk waited until they had walked away to grab the caps before he spoke up. “Look, about the last Drift-“
“It’s fine.” He brushed him off with a wave of his hand, eyes staring stonily towards the front. “I know you saw everything.”
“But I don’t want you to think that what I saw affects us in anyway.” Yongguk continued as his hand crept towards him. “Our neural handshake was strong and-“
The tech’s interrupted whatever he was about to say as they re-entered Joko’s head with the caps in their hands.
“You two ready?” Himchan appeared again on the screen. “Initiating the bridge.”
The caps were placed over their heads and the Drift started almost immediately. Youngjae bit down onto his tongue as the vertigo enveloped him and the only thing that stopped him from getting lost in the memories again was Yongguk’s calm voice in his ear.
“I’m right here. Don’t drown in your head, kid. Stay with me.”
His eyes finally focused and he turned his head to see Yongguk’s slow, easy smile. “I did it.”
Yongguk nodded. “You did. Good job. Now let’s see if we can move around a little easier.”
This time the Drift was stronger with both of them fully concentrating on their connection.
“I’m sorry for pushing you so far earlier.” Yongguk’s voice in his head was regretful. “I knew the only way to get you to fully fight me was if you were set off.”
“And you couldn’t apologize to me face to face?”
A chuckle sounded next to him and he risked a glance at Yongguk’s face. “Wouldn’t match my image now would it?”
“Bastard.”
“Now, now JaeJae. Don’t be mean to the man that knows all of your secrets.”
An image of himself at a thirteen year old entered his head, hand hot and slick in the dim room as he watched one of the movies he had downloaded to his computer.
“Gotta admit, I never pegged you for a masochist. Gay, I kinda picked up on. But whips and chains, man? That’s hardcore.”
Hot anger filled his brain and even though the rational side of him knew Yongguk was doing this to bring out his fighter again he still kind of hated him for laughing at his private moments. The second they were out of these harnesses he was going t-
“I never once laughed at you.” He was hit with one of Yongguk’s memories, of a younger and more clean-cut Bang Yongguk, hands buried wrist deep down the front of some faceless boy’s jeans. The other boy’s moans faded until all he could hear was Yongguk’s harsh breaths, front teeth digging into his full bottom lip as he lay sprawled out over the other’s body. “Like what you see, kid?”
He jerked to attention after realizing he had been watching the scene play out in his head for so long that Jokomato had ceased moving and Himchan was yelling angrily into the Conn-Pod.
And that was when Youngjae knew certain that he was really and truly fucked.
---
“Come on Youngjae!” Yongguk chased him as he ran towards his room trying desperately to get away from the older man. “I didn’t mean to piss you off so badly! Would you just listen to me?”
Youngjae reached his room and shakily inserted his key card, realized it was the wrong direction and was attempting it again when Yongguk caught up, hand slamming the door closed.
“Move.” He tried to sound demanding but it came out more like a whimper.
“I’m sorry.” Yongguk gripped his wrist and turned him so that he could see the honesty in his expression. “You left your mind wide open while you were watching and you might have accidentally projected some of your more personal thoughts on to me.” He winced and Youngjae knew he was mentally berating himself for his stupidity. “I didn’t know you were a virgin, Youngjae. It was thoughtless of me to push my feelings onto you.”
His eyes widened at the memory of Yongguk’s final thought in his mind. The attempt to get away from him after what he had seen was so overwhelming that he hadn’t even paid attention to anything else. But now he remembered the soft words spoken inside him, the feel of Yongguk caressing his mind as he mentally transferred Youngjae’s flushed face overtop the moaning boy’s.
“Yongguk?” He knew Yongguk was still connected to him, his fingertips vibrated with the need to reconnect them. The Drift had been cut off so abruptly that they both were shaking. Yongguk’s pupils were dilated and he had chewed his bottom lip into a bloody mess. “I don’t understand…” He took a step backwards into his room as Yongguk took one determined one towards him. “But you hate me?”
A manic grin curled up Yongguk’s mouth and Youngjae realized he had stepped so far into his dorm that Yongguk was completely inside now and he felt a tiny spark of fear. “We hate that which we often fear.” He murmured as he reached behind him to shut and lock the door.
Youngjae swallowed heavily, his hands twitching behind his back with the desire to find out what Yongguk’s skin felt like. It had to be the residual effects of the Drift, he assured himself. Yongguk was still projecting and that had to be the only reason. “William Shakespeare.” He tried to make his voice calm but the slight tremble didn’t pass unnoticed by Yongguk’s sharp ears. “Who knew the brawler read Shakespeare?”
“There’s a lot about me you don’t know.” Yongguk’s voice was seductive, the smooth tones licking their way across Youngjae’s skin. “I can show you.”
He closed his eyes and breathed deeply through his nose, hoping that if he removed the image of Yongguk leering needily at him that it would calm his heartbeat and force the want out of his veins.
“We’re still Drifting, Youngjae.” He whined embarrassingly at the warmth that was suddenly pressed flat against him, Yongguk’s lips tracing the shell of his ear. “Can you feel it? The Drift keeps our minds connected even if the machines are gone.” Fingers walked their way up the bottom of his t-shirt only to smooth across his bare skin. “You’re projecting your thoughts all over the building right now.”
The rational side of Youngjae, however small that was right now, was telling him to wipe that cocky tone right out of Yongguk’s voice, but the longer he stood frozen the harder it was to hear that tiny voice of reason. He opened his eyes to a view of Yongguk’s broad shoulders as the older man worked his way from Youngjae’s ears and down the curve of his jaw. When he felt a tongue flick teasingly over his fluttering pulse he couldn’t stop the whimper that burst out of his lips. He had never known that could be a point of arousal, but the wet tip tickling his skin made all reservations fly out of the window.
“Drift with me.” Yongguk whispered. He sat down on the edge of the book and pulled Youngjae forward to sprawl across his legs. The restraint it took to hold himself back at the sight of Youngjae’s flushed cheeks and parted lips was huge, every cell in his body was aching by this point. He’d be lying if he had said he hadn’t noticed Youngjae around the building these last few months of training. Keeping him out of that secret was an exercise in strength during their times together in Jokomato. But right now he wanted nothing more than to just give in and take what he wanted. “Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed for any of us anymore. This could be our only chance.”
He wanted to laugh at Yongguk’s cheesy pick-up lines but they both knew it was true. Now that the Kaiju were coming bigger and faster the Jaeger’s wouldn’t be able to keep up for very long. Eventually the monsters were going to overtake them and they wouldn’t be able to defend themselves. Every one of them could die tomorrow.
Yongguk let out a muffled oomph as Youngjae shoved him backwards and crawled over his body, lips seeking his with no regrets. He prodded at the corner of Youngjae’s mouth with the tip of his tongue until he was welcomed in and then it was all teeth and it was sloppy and Yongguk couldn’t imagine a better first kiss. It was obvious that Youngjae was inexperienced but he more than made up for it with enthusiasm and the soft mewls he made against Yongguk’s mouth.
A swift roll had Youngjae on his back with his legs spread and Yongguk’s palms curled around his hips as he lapped at his pulse point again causing Youngjae to desperately pant his name into the quiet room.
“Pants.” He managed to choke out as his fingers fumbled around the button on Yongguk’s uniform until the older man sat up and pushed his hands away to do it himself.
Yongguk was still sending him images in his head of everywhere he wanted to touch and all the different patches of skin he wanted to taste and a split second of wondering just how strong their Drift capabilities were if he was still able to do this even when the bridge was disconnected flashed through his head as Yongguk yanked his own uniform pants to his ankles. But a sharp bite to the inside of his thigh stopped the thoughts from going forward and all he wanted in this instant was to feel Yongguk’s bare skin pressed against his as he fucked him hard against the bed.
“Shit.” Yongguk took a break from working their shirts off to drop his head forward and take a ragged breath. “I’m not going to last long if you keep throwing those kind of thoughts at me.”
He sent him a snapshot of himself on his knees, face buried against Yongguk’s soft skin as he gripped tightly into Youngjae’s shaggy hair and he even managed to conjure the lewd sounds he remembered from the videos that were still saved and password protected on his computer.
With a warning growl Yongguk finally managed to rip his shirt over his head and dropped down with a thud, his heart beating wildly against Youngjae’s chest. “That’s going to have to wait until tomorrow.” He promised, slurping obscenely on his fingers before removing them with a loud pop.
“I thought you said we weren’t promised tomorrow?” He winced at the first initial burn but managed to stay relaxed and calm. “And I have lube in the drawer you could have used.”
“You little fuck.” Yongguk nipped playfully at his lips, one finger quickly turning to two. “I can see you remembering doing this to yourself. And I meant it when I said we’re not guaranteed anything.” Well versed fingertips pressed just right against him to make Youngjae’s legs fall farther open and his eyes to roll back into his head. “But if you’re promising that will happen then I will kill the Kaiju with my bare fucking hands to come back and get it.”
When he was sure Youngjae was ready he removed his fingers and grabbed for the bottle Youngjae had mentioned in his drawer. It took longer to completely place himself inside Youngjae than it did for most of his other partners. They had mainly been random people he had met in his years in the program, people he would never see again.
But Youngjae was his partner.
“I’m not made of glass.” Youngjae huffed. His thighs squeezed tighter around Yongguk’s hips and he let out a breath of relief when Yongguk was finally seated inside of him.
After a few moments he managed to roll his hips upwards causing Yongguk’s muscles to tighten and his lips to thin as he glared testily from up above him. “Stop asking me to treat you like them in your head.” He ordered, palm cupping Youngjae’s ruddy cheek and starting to rock slowly forward. “Next time.” His voice cracked when Youngjae interrupted him to lift his bottom of the bed and meet him thrust for thrust. “God, I thought you were a virgin?”
“I watch… a lot of movies…” Youngjae panted.
Youngjae? Youngjae what are you doing? Where is Yongguk, why isn’t he pulling them out?
“What was th-?”
“Just ignore it.” Yongguk pressed open mouthed kisses against his collarbones as he shifted to lift Youngjae’s leg against his shoulder making all of Youngjae’s questions disappear and leaving Yongguk’s name the only thought in his head. “Concentrate only on me.”
He didn’t need to tell him that, all Youngjae could think about right now was the feel of Yongguk’s hips dragging slowly up and down the back of his thighs as he groaned hotly against his skin. He scraped his nails down Yongguk’s back just to hear the strangled gasps full of pain over and over and why didn’t anyone tell him that sex with your Jaeger partner wasn’t only physical, it was mental as well?
“Stop thinking so hard.” A chuckle vibrated his neck and Yongguk pulled away far enough to grab at his other leg, lifting it to hang over his other shoulder and grabbing at Youngjae’s arms to hold him in place. As hot as the boy’s crazed bucking and full-body shaking was, he was having a hard time building up a steady rhythm because of it. “Shh Jae, shh.”
Yongguk’s grip around his arms was the only thing stopping him from floating away but it wasn’t enough, he needed more. He breathed out Yongguk’s name and hoped he would be able to figure out what he needed. The slight shift and higher tilt of the other’s hips was instantaneous, Yongguk having to tighten his hold on Youngjae’s arms as his body started to tighten and his fingers opened and closed trying to reach between their bellies.
“No. Don’t touch yourself.” Yongguk released him to bat his hand away and do it himself, his movements rough and fast with calloused palms that scraped across Youngjae’s sensitive skin in ways that made electicity current through his body. “I’m going to lose it soon.” He told him honestly, trapping his lip between his teeth and using the painful pricks to distract himself from the bubbling heat in his belly.
Should we bring in the doctors?
No, give Yongguk a little more time. He’s probably explaining things.
By the time he had Youngjae gasping loudly and screaming his name out as the liquid warmth smeared across their stomachs, he was close to tipping over the edge. Youngjae’s legs were thrown off of his shoulders to the bed and Yongguk grabbed him by his hips again, thumbs pressing against the thin skin so deeply that Youngjae tried but failed to tell him to loosen his grip. He may not have been as vocal as the other boy, but Youngjae was still feeling tingles inside of his body by the soft phrases under Yongguk’s breath about all of the things he was going to do to him next time.
The thought that next time sounded pretty amazing that Youngjae projected into his own brain was what drove him to release with a deep growl, his body slowing and finally stilling and collapsing overtop of Youngjae.
“I’m sorry.” He muttered against Youngjae’s sweat-slicked chest.
“For what?” Youngjae was so tired but he couldn’t seem to make himself rest. Every time he closed his eyes and tried to drift off into sleep his body felt wide awake and alert.
Youngjae! Yongguk!
He sat up with a gasp, pushing Yongguk off in shock. “There! What was that? I heard it again!”
Yongguk’s face was guilty and he had the nerve to shrug his shoulders apologetically. “Please don’t be mad?”
With astonishment he realized he could feel Yongguk mentally tugging on him, trying to pull him out of his dorm.
Once he figured out what was happening he made sure to get one solid punch on Yongguk’s cheek before they slowly regained awareness back in the Conn-Pod.
---
“Stupid Ranger with this stupid impressive mind talents.” Youngjae hissed angrily under his breath as he stalked back to his dorm after supper that night, his real dorm this time. He had promptly unhooked himself from Jokomato after Yongguk humiliated him and hadn’t looked his way since. Even if he could feel the regret rolling over his partner in waves he wasn’t going to give him the dignity of looking at him. “Stupid bastards who trick you into sleeping with them.”
“In my defense, there was no tricking involved.” Yongguk’s voice startled him into dropping the foam cup of coffee in his hands.
He looked down at the mess on the floor and sighed. “I’m not cleaning that up.”
Yongguk waved it off. “Someone will come along soon and see it. Can we talk?”
Even if he just wanted to go to bed and pretend this whole day never happened and that he wasn’t currently standing in front of the man who he had just a few hours ago imagined inside of him, he knew Yongguk wouldn’t go away until he had a chance to explain himself. “Five minutes.”
“I’m sorry.” Was the only thing Yongguk could think to say to him. “I’m really, really sorry.”
He rolled his eyes and pointed at the door. “Not good enough. Now get out.”
Yongguk slammed the open door shut and stood in front of it crossing his arms threateningly over his chest. “I’m not leaving until you forgive me! Look, I’ve been a Jaeger pilot for a long time. I know the ins and outs of Drifting. I’m sorry that I fucked with your head but it was the only way for you to accept me! If I wasn’t already in your brain and reassuring you everything was alright then you never would have let me in!”
“And how do you know that?” He cried, stomping his foot on the floor like a child. “Did you ever make me think you wanted that from me at all? Did you ever treat me like a human or just belittle and smartass me every second? Maybe I would have surprised you!” He could feel his temper rising and wanted nothing more than to just slam Yongguk’s head against the door and make him cry.
“Try it.” Yongguk’s lip curled up and Youngjae recognized the stubborn glint in the man’s eyes. “I dare you to try and hurt me.” At Youngjae’s silent response he snorted and dropped his hands. “I knew the great genius Yoo Youngjae didn’t have the balls to attack anyone. That’s your problem, Jae. You always do what you think you’re supposed to, never what you want.” His eyelids dropped until all Youngjae could see was blackness and he smirked. “What do you want, Youngjae?”
His answer was quick, the blood already rushing to his head and making him dizzy. “To hurt you.”
Yongguk spread his arms to the sides and cocked an eyebrow up. “Then hurt me.”
But he couldn’t. Not until he knew where they stood. Youngjae may have known the end of the world was imminent, but that didn’t mean he didn’t have feelings. “And the Kaiju? What happens if-?”
“What happens is Jokomato can go down with us hating each other.” He grabbed Youngjae’s hand and pulled him flush against him, breath smelling like beer and hamburgers and salt and desperation. “Or we can go down together. As a team."
“And if we win? If we defeat the Kaiju?”
Yongguk’s slow smile was patient. “Then we find some other place to fight like ten year olds. Personally I like the beach. It’d be real relaxing to throw your nagging ass into the ocean several times.”
Youngjae shook his head, already knowing he had lost this go around but still not yet wanting to give up. “The mountains. It’s better for my research if I’m alone and it’s quiet.”
Yongguk shut him up with a press of his lips, eyelashes fluttering against Youngjae’s cheeks. “Mountains it is then.”
Rated: M (this is the first smut I've written in months so I'm sorry but it was a jumping back in story for me)
Length: 8.9K
This is a BangJae/Pacific Rim crossover so if you have no clue at all what Pacific Rim is then you are gonna be hella lost. HERE is the Pacific Rim Wiki if you wanna search for more info. Basically the story is that massive skyscraper sized monsters are being let out from a portal under the sea bed and humans make their own giant robots to fight them. The pilots are joined telepathically.
*story title from HERE
Kaiju: monster
Ranger: pilots
Jaeger: robots (Youngjae built Jokomato)
Drift: what happens in a neural connection when the two Rangers are connected
With a shake of his head Yoo Youngjae eliminated the third Ranger wannabe from the group. After the fourth and then the fifth were also turned away for no other reason than he didn’t like them, his boss had finally had enough. With a sigh Himchan grabbed his arm and tugged him out of the room.
“We can’t afford to be so choosy, Youngjae. All of these men are good choices and you know it. Why are you being like this?”
He crossed his arms over his chest and narrowed his eyes at the taller man. “They aren’t good enough. Jokomato deserves the best.”
Himchan pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers as he tried to reason with the well-known stubborn scientist. “Youngjae, I know you’ve bonded with the Jaeger b-“
“Jokomato.”
His jaw clenching, Himchan nodded. “Yes, I know you’ve bonded with Jokomato, but we need to find Ranger’s for him. There was two Kaiju attacks in the last month and we have to have all of the available Jaeger’s out there fighting.”
Himchan was right, something that always burned Youngjae up inside. He didn’t like it when people disagreed with him. Mainly because it rarely ever happened. As the youngest scientist in the Kaiju Science division, he took pride in always presenting cold hard facts.
“I know Jokomato.” He felt defeated knowing his creation was just going to be handed off to two people who didn’t know it inside and out like he did. “I know how he ticks and what he’s thinking. I don’t want him to go to someone who isn’t worthy.”
“Do you really think I would let that happen, Youngjae?” Himchan’s loud commanding voice softened to a degree Youngjae had never heard before. It made him uncomfortable. “I won’t give Jokomato to anyone that I don’t think deserves him.”
He nodded and turned back to the remaining Ranger wannabe’s behind the glass door. “Alright then, who’s next?”
They took their post back up at the side of the room and watched Jongup bring two more men up who had scored compatibly on their tests. “Yongguk and Daehyun.”
The two men took their places on opposite sides of the mat with their hanbo’s held out defensively in front of them. Youngjae didn’t know how they could have possibly scored compatibly if their looks were any judge. One was taller with brown buzzed hair and a sly smile on his lips, body skinnier than it probably should have been but still holding on to some slight muscle. The other boy was shorter with light brown hair and frosted blonde tips, his clothes plain but obviously more expensive than anyone else’s in the room. They looked to have nothing in common so he was curious as to how their fight would go.
The smaller boy made the first move and any idiot could have seen it coming a mile away. He didn’t even try to feign his attack, just went straight for the other one who easily blocked it with a powerful slam of his hanbo into his chest.
“That all you got?” He asked in a surprisingly deep voice. “My little sister hits me better than that.”
This only proved to infuriate the other, his cheeks red at the embarrassment. He came back again, this time managing to land a hard hit on the side of the other’s waist earning him a snarl. “Does your sister do that?”
The time for play was over with both men giving it all they had, neither showing any finesse or grace in their fighting, something Youngjae was looking for. He didn’t want brutes in Joko. You had to find the right balance between strength and smarts. The strength to control the machine and the smarts to know the right way to do things.
These two didn’t have that.
“Enough.” He shook his head at them. “What is wrong with all of you? None of you have been even a quarter worthy of my Jaeger. I’d have better luck shoving a monkey in there and letting it be a pilot!”
The taller man shook his hanbo at him in anger. “And who are you to decide who’s best for the missions? You’re nothing but an egghead in a white coat. You have no real Kaiju experience.”
Youngjae was stunned at the outburst. No one had ever yelled at him before. Even Himchan would speak slowly and calmly to him anytime he had an outburst. “Excuse me?” He replied in shock. “Who do you think you are?”
Jongup jumped up, oblivious smile on his lips. “His name’s Yongguk, Dr. Yoo!”
He took a deep breath so that he could force a smile at the tiny happy boy. “Thank you Jongup.” The kid may have been the best battle teacher they had but he sure was missing a few beams in his roof. “That information proved very helpful.”
Yongguk scoffed and crossed his arms across his chest. “All you nerds think you’re better than us Ranger’s. Just because you’re smarter and do the technical work you think all we do is jump into the Conn-Pod’s and have the easy parts.”
“And what do you know about piloting a Jaeger? Done some simulations and think you’re a master at it?”
Once again Jongup inserted himself in between the two, the bright smile now dipping at the corners a little. “Um, actually Yongguk is an experienced Ranger. He brought down two Kaiju in his old Jaeger, Shishi.”
The stats from the decommissioned Jaeger filled Youngjae’s mind. He knew one of the Ranger’s was named Bang Yongguk but he didn’t think this was the same Yongguk. Shishi had killed two Kaiju’s near the Sino-Russian border: Guaiwu and Yaomo Spear. It had been struck down off the coast of Beijing by Chui Tou and only one escape pod had been activated.
“Feel a little like an asshole now, don’t you?” Yongguk’s grin was friendly but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Good. I hate people like you.”
That was too far for Youngjae, his immature side coming to the surface. “If it wasn’t for people like me then dumb little boys like you wouldn’t stand a chance out there with the Kaiju. You’d be eaten alive just like everyone else.”
They didn’t notice Himchan and the rest of the trainee’s standing back and watching their verbal duel. Himchan’s eyes flicked back and forth between the two, gaze pondering and curious.
Yongguk took a few steps closer, putting himself right into Youngjae’s personal space, something he hated. “You’re all the same. Assholes. No wonder everyone warned us to stay away from you. They said you were the worst of them all.”
Okay, that stung a little. Youngjae knew he was hard to approach, but he never thought that everyone actually hated him. He preferred to think he was intimidating and people were in awe of him.
Guess not.
He jerked Yongguk’s hanbo out of his hands and impulsively slapped it against his shoulder, the weak hit not even causing him to flinch. “Why don’t you just go fuck yourself then?” He shouted, raining blows down on him while Yongguk easily reflected all of them. “There’s no way someone like you is getting anywhere near my Jaeger!”
Yongguk pushed into him again, his eyes now mere slits in his tense face. One hand snatched the wrist with the hanbo out of midair and jerked it behind Youngjae’s sweaty back, the other tangling painfully hard into his messy black hair and pulled so hard it brought stars to Youngjae’s eyes.
“Stop it!” He demanded trying to wiggle his way free, but Yongguk’s hold was so tight he only succeeded in making his hair more tangled in the hard fist.
“You scared?” Yongguk’s gaze was deadly and Youngjae finally realized that maybe he had misjudged the Ranger. What he thought was airheaded brawn was actually a tightly coiled body that was wound around him like a rattlesnake. “I could snap your neck with one twist.” He continued in a whisper.
“Okay that’s enough.” Himchan clapped his hands reminding the two about where they were, their arms quickly dropping from the other. “I’ve seen all I need to see. Everyone can head to the mess hall.”
Hissing at Yongguk’s purposeful shoulder bump as he walked past, Youngjae ran after his boss wondering why they weren’t letting the other trainees have a turn.
“I don’t need to see anyone else. We know who the most compatible two are now.”
Youngjae cocked his head to the side in confusion. Even though he graduated college at seventeen, he sometimes lacked a little on the uptake. “But Daehyun and Yongguk had nothing in common. There’s no way they could successfully Drift for very long.”
With a snort of laughter, Himchan turned to him incredulously. “It’s you and Yongguk, Youngjae. You two were more in sync than anyone I’ve come across in the last two years as Commander.”
His tray dropped to the ground with a loud clatter.
“You have got to be kidding me!”
---
He eyed Yongguk with thinly veiled contempt from across the small cabin inside Jokomato’s head. There was no way this would work. Even Yongguk looked pissed if the tightly crossed arms and deep furrow in his brow was any indication.
“You can’t expect me to go out into the fight with this idiot.”
“Hey!” Youngjae was in the top three percent of graduates of all time from his alma mater, there was no reason to lie about his intellect.
Yongguk threw his arms up in exasperation. “See! He doesn’t even know why I’m calling him an idiot! You have to put me with someone who has experience with the Kaiju, not some nerd who sits in his lab all day and can claim numerous simulation kills!”
Sixteen. He wasn’t going to say that out loud of course, but he had sixteen Kaiju simulation kills under his belt, thank you very much.
“Himchan, as much as I would enjoy proving this walking monkey wrong, it is true that I’ve never made an actual neural bridge with someone before. I made the Jaeger, but I haven’t ever been hooked up to it.”
Himchan shook his head and waved at the other doctor’s to continue setting the equipment. “You’ll learn as you go. This is the only option we have to get Jokomato out there. You and Yongguk are the only two that can hold their own against each other.”
Yongguk raised his hand. “Speaking of Jokomato, can I petition to have its name changed? To something a little less silly?”
Baring his teeth, Youngjae spun around to hiss his direction. “Oh but Shishi is manly?”
“Shishi is the name of a warrior lion, you little-“
“Boys!” Himchan raised his voice, turning him into the Commander and causing everyone in the room to freeze. “I’m in charge, I say who teams up with who, I say Jokomato sticks. Now if you two want to stop being pissy little children and want to, oh I don’t know, start saving the world, then I suggest you put on your big boy pants and let’s get working.” His small eyes narrowed at each of them in turn. “Do you two understand me?”
They nodded, both embarrassed at being chastised. “Yes sir.” They mumbled.
“Good.” The happy smile was back on his face as he clapped his hands and indicated he wanted the caps brought out. “You two go ahead and get hooked up and we’ll get the Drift started.”
They were silent as the tech’s helped buckle and snap all of their equipment into place, leaving them both attached to Jokomato at several points by long hose attachments. Youngjae could feel his heartbeat starting to flutter in his chest and he had to take short deep breaths to try and calm himself down.
“It’s going to feel like you’re falling.” Yongguk muttered under his breath. “Don’t fight the pull, if you fight it then we won’t connect.”
He didn’t answer, not wanting his unsolicited advice. Sixteen simulations had made him more than adequately prepared for the initial bridge. The only difference between them and this was that he wasn’t wearing the suit those other times. He was nervous just because this was something new and different and Yoo Youngjae did not adapt well to new and different. His life was neat and square and logical, just like him. Being a Ranger wasn’t ever in his plans because of the unpredictability and wildness to their work. Sitting quietly at a desk all day was more enjoyable to him.
“Don’t get distracted by your memories.” Yongguk continued, either not realizing Youngjae wasn’t paying attention or just not caring. “If you let them suck you in then I’ll have to chase after you.”
Right before the cap was placed over their heads, Yongguk let loose with one more piece of advice.
“And whatever you do, don’t let yourself fall into my memories.”
---
Baseball cards and watermelon and the smell of his grandfather’s cologne.
It’s so hot, why hasn’t mom turned the air conditioning on yet?
Scraped knees as Bae Ho pushed him into the ground after school again. The pinch on his cheek as his glasses broke apart.
Youngjae!
Youngjae, how many pairs of glasses are you going to break before you stop being so clumsy?
Youngjae get out of there!
“Neural bridge not yet connected.”
“Dr. Yoo’s blood pressure is rising. Should we disconnect?”
“No. Hold on for a little bit longer. Let’s see if Yongguk can pull him out of it.”
His head was killing him and his whole body felt like it was covered in mosquito bites, only a thousand times itchier. The sound of his mother’s dramas was loud in the background and he tried to whisper to her.
“Do you need more cream on your chicken pox, sweetheart? No, no don’t pull your mittens off YOUNGJAE LISTEN TO ME YOU’RE IN YOUR MEMORIES THIS IS NOT REAL WAKE U- they’re there to help you stop scratching them and making it worse.” Her cool hands were pressed against his hot forehead and he melted into the touch.
The slap was hard against his cheek and he gasped, eyes clenching shut tightly in pain.
“Open your eyes.” Yongguk’s voice was surprisingly gentle and warm, his palm caressing the pink spots he had made on his cheek. “Look at me. Look at only me. This isn’t real.”
“Yongguk?” His eyes fluttered open and he found himself in a flattened city, dust clouding the air around them and the sound of muffled screams in his ears. “Where are we?”
“Beijing.” Yongguk’s face was grim as he surveyed their surroundings. “This was the clearest memory I could pull you to. I got us away from the Kaiju but we need to get out of here.”
Youngjae knew where they were now. This was where Shishi was struck down by Chui Tou and Yongguk’s former partner was killed. He could hear the fight but couldn’t see it from the dark alley he was huddled in.
“I want to see.” Youngjae pulled away ignoring Yongguk’s warning growl. “I want to see you in action.”
He turned the corner and froze, the sight of the skyscraper sized Chui Tou barely three blocks away was so horrifying and so mesmerizing he couldn’t do anything but watch. This was the first Kaiju attack he had seen in person. The rest were on news channels that had to zoom in from miles away to get a decent shot.
But this…
“Neural bridge is halfway connected. Continue holding.”
“Please can we just leave.” Yongguk sounded strained and if Youngjae had been halfway thinking he would have realized that seeing Shishi go down in a pile of twisted metal and bite marks and watching his escape pod deploy while his partners stayed still might not be the best thing.
But Youngjae was transfixed on the fight between Chui Tou and Shishi and the almost graceful way the Jaeger moved as it deflected blow after blow even though it was clearly unevenly matched against the giant Kaiju. Chui Tou was only a Category Two, but what it lacked in size it made up for with its power. The giant knob over its forehead was how it had earned its name as it pounded bus sized holes into Shishi’s body.
Shishi was obviously on the end stage of the fight, its right arm hanging uselessly by its side and the left leg’s metal peeled back in waves and leaving it barely useable.
“My partner was already half dead.” Yongguk murmured, his own eyes unable to look away from the scene. Shishi fell to the ground, its head cratering the concrete. “I deployed as we were going down and woke up in a hospital three days later.” Youngjae’s hand found his, the skin clammy and shaking against his own. Youngjae could feel their minds completely joined now, the rest of Yongguk’s memories washing over him just as he knew his were invading Yongguk’s brain. “Let’s get to work.”
He came to in the Conn-Pod with a gasp, Yongguk already alert beside him and testing out Jokomato’s weapons holograms. Jokomato was in him and he was in Jokomato and oh god was his Jaeger breathing and-
“Calm down Youngjae.” Yongguk barely mouthed the words but they hit Youngjae’s ears like sirens. “Breathe at the same rate I’m breathing and concentrate on your movements.”
He finally took the other man’s advice and forced himself to look at the matter at hand. They were in Joko’s Conn-Pod and they were side by side and had to work together. “What do I do?” He managed to croak out, lifting his hand and watching Joko’s lift his also from the viewing screen.
“Let’s try to walk. Just let it flow naturally, both of us together.” Yongguk lifted up a leg and Youngjae followed until they had their rhythm’s matching and Jokomato was walking around the empty service area. “See, not too hard. Now let’s do some bigger movement. Have you learned any fighting techniques?”
He grimaced and shrugged. “Not really. I’ve seen Jongup teach a few of the trainees some things but I’ve never tried it out.”
“It will start to come to you pretty naturally once we’re face to face with a Kaiju.” Yongguk reassured him. “Your body will instinctually try to fight back from danger. We just need to learn how to do it together so Jokomato doesn’t get confused.”
Himchan’s face appeared on the holographic screen in front of them. “You’re doing great, Youngjae. Don’t worry about getting too in-depth with the fighting just yet. We just wanted to get you used to the controls and to see how well you and Yongguk work together.” His wink went unnoticed by the over-stimulated Youngjae as he tried to successfully turn from side to side in the restricting harnesses. “Just lead Jokomato back to the holding dock and rest up. You have a busy day tomorrow.”
Before he could ask what his Commander meant, the corner of the screen turned black.
Yongguk chuckled beside him as they slowly led Jokomato back to where they started at. “You and I are spending the day learning how to move and fight together.” His voice suddenly sounded in Youngjae’s head and it caused Jokomato to spasm as it walked. “Did you forget we could do this, too?”
It disconcerted him how Yongguk could go from complete asshole to caring co-pilot to tease in the matter of just a few minutes.
“It’s a gift.”
“Stay out of my head!” He screeched loudly once Jokomato was securely docked back into her holding station. “Talk to me normally!”
Once the tech’s had them unhooked from the harnesses and their uniforms off, Youngjae snatched the cap off his head and shoved it into Himchan’s hands as he stormed past. The sudden snap of his link with Yongguk shocked him with how empty he felt. He had heard that co-pilot’s stayed connected even when the neural bridge was broken but he had never realized just how strong it was. The need to stay close to Yongguk made him angry and he not for the first time wondered just what the hell he had gotten himself into.
---
“You look like hell.” Jongup slid into the seat across from him in the mess hall and noisily banged his topped out tray down onto the table.
He hummed what could have a response back as he rested his head on his arms, completely ignoring the food to the left of him. It had been more than twelve hours since he had been linked to Yongguk and he could still feel the other man in his mind. And he was pretty sure he was laughing at him. “Residual effects.”
Jongup nodded as he slathered his French fries in ketchup. “Yeah I heard that’s messy. I think they’re gonna do it again tomorrow night. Only gonna get worse.”
He slowly lifted his head and stared dryly at the annoying boy. “Gee Jongup. Thanks for the voice of support.”
“You’re welcome!”
Before he had even sat down Youngjae could feel Yongguk coming towards them. He could hear his heart beating and the hum under his breath in his ears. “Go away.” He muttered under his breath, knowing full well Yongguk would hear it.
“Hey kids.” Yongguk slammed his tray on the table so that the loud boom would cause Youngjae’s headache to worsen. “Big day today, eh? You up for it, Soft Pants?”
Youngjae growled and moved down a seat. How long would he feel connected to Yongguk? Was this a permanent side-effect? Wasn’t it supposed to wear off?
Yongguk’s memories still played in his mind like a never-ending movie reel. The loud childhood, the weeks spent in suspension for fighting in school, the death of his father and the toll it took on him. He could even recall with perfect clarity the last dying scream Yongguk’s partner had made in Shishi before it was dealt its death blow.
“Stop thinking about him.” Yongguk’s hands were gripping onto the table so tightly that his knuckles were white. “I can feel you.” He pushed himself away from the table and stormed out of the mess hall, leaving his full tray behind him.
“A word of advice?” Jongup reached over to snag the bowl of oatmeal Yongguk hadn’t even touched. “Don’t scroll through all of your partner’s memories right next to them. Not unless you want them to do the same back to you.” His small eyes narrowed at Youngjae as he calmly finished off Yongguk’s uneaten breakfast.
It wasn’t like he threw all of those memories at Yongguk on purpose, Youngjae reassured himself as he headed towards the practice room after barely eating his toast and orange juice. They were stuck in his head and he couldn’t escape from them. He now knew more about the angry warrior than he wanted to. All of his thoughts, all of the dreams he had before this stupid war started.
A sudden thought stopped him in his tracks and he slapped his hand over his head in anger. “God Youngjae, you’re so stupid sometimes!”
If he knew Yongguk’s biggest secrets, then that meant Yongguk knew his too.
---
“Go choose your hanbo.” Yongguk wasted no time with pleasantries, his eyes not even turning towards Youngjae when he entered the practice room. “Lay it on the floor beside you.”
He quietly followed orders, his brain still racing with the realization he had come to ten minutes earlier.
“You don’t want to go right into the hard fighting. You need to stretch your body out first and get your muscles warmed up.” Yongguk explained, settling himself onto the ground and easily placing his legs to the sides. “Try to reach towards your toes and go as low as you can.”
Youngjae could barely get his legs in a very slight v shape before his thighs burned and he had to give up. With a grunt of pain he threw his head forward and tried to slap at his feet.
A small chuckle sounded behind him before he felt Yongguk’s chest pressed warmly against his back, gently guiding his body down into the correct angle so that he could reach more comfortably. “You don’t want to force your body, Youngjae.” His own name was breathed hotly against his ear and Youngjae half wondered if Yongguk was doing this just to be an asshole. “You have to exercise the same way you would operate your Jaeger: calmly and rationally.”
He nodded and shrugged his shoulders until Yongguk got the hint and moved away. This time he followed the more experienced man’s instructions and leaned over carefully until the tips of his fingers were able to wrap over his toes.
“Better.” Yongguk praised, his own body stretched to unbelievable contortions next to him. “Now try to do some push-ups.”
Youngjae gulped, his head shaking back and forth. No way was he showing off how weak typing and sketching made his arms. “No, let’s not.” He pointed towards the hanbo sticks lying beside them. “Why don’t we get to the trying to fight part of the lesson?”
With a smirk Yongguk kicked his legs up and was on his feet in one motion, hand reaching down for Youngjae. “Alright, but you really should be more stretched out before I start in on you.” His words were accompanied by a knowing wink and a grin and Youngjae wanted to wipe that smug look right off of his face. “I don’t want to break you.” Now Yongguk was just toying with him.
He narrowed his eyes and pushed Yongguk’s hand away. “I’m a lot tougher than you think.” Youngjae sneered, holding the hanbo out in front of him. Even if he had no experience in it, surely he could hold his own. After all his instincts were usually pretty good.
A sharp whack to his hip had him groaning out in pain.
“Stay alert.” Yongguk ordered, circling around him. “Don’t ever let your prey see your attention drift.”
Their hanbo’s connected with a loud crack as Youngjae thought wrongly that he had the upper hand and took a shot.
Yongguk’s smile was predatory when Youngjae realized he was slowly being edged into the corner of the room, all the exits on the other side and nowhere to go.
“And most importantly,” Yongguk’s deep voice dropped even lower, his body so close that Youngjae could feel the heat from his skin. “Never let your opponent get the advantage.”
---
He was exhausted. Exhausted and sore and cranky and just in an all-around bad mood. At least he didn’t feel Yongguk in his head as much as he did yesterday, but they were supposed to Drift again in a few hours so it was a short reprieve.
They had spent more than eight hours together yesterday in training and Youngjae never wanted to see the smirk on those lips ever again. Today Himchan had insisted on even more exercises so that they would be worn out for the Drift test. He thought that if Youngjae had all the fight taken out of him that they would join easier.
Youngjae just saw it as an excuse for the crew to laugh at his out of shape attempts to bring Yongguk down.
None had proved successful thus far.
“You’ll never beat me.” Yongguk had taunted him earlier, his skin slicked and his chapped lips pulled up in the corner. “There’s nothing you can do that I won’t deflect. You’re worthless. You’re defenseless and you’re nothing more than a piece of trash on the bottom of my boots.”
He had to know his words were only proving to make Youngjae near maniacal. Even though the after effects of the Drift were fading they still pounded in the back of his head, especially when they were so close he could smell the sweat dripping down his neck.
“Shut up.” It wasn’t the best comeback of Youngjae’s grip on his hanbo grew a little tighter. Yongguk was pushing him to the breaking point and if he snapped there wasn’t going to be any stopping.
A childish pout was thrown his direction, Yongguk tapping his stick against Youngjae’s forehead in quick succession. “Aw, is JaeJae getting angry? You think the Kaiju are going to take it easy on you? You think they’ll sit there and patiently wait for you to decide what move you want to make next?” The hanbo poked against his shoulder until he angrily pushed it away. “Come on, show me what you’re really made of. Be a man.”
The next step was his last as Youngjae launched himself forward, his stick slamming Yongguk backwards several feet until he caught himself, a surprised look on his face. Once he realized he had finally gotten Youngjae’s natural instincts to react he threw himself back into the fight, the wooden sticks clanging against each other as they moved in step across the room together.
“That’s it, Youngjae!” Yongguk finally had a real smile on his face, his eyes lighting up with amusement as Youngjae managed to land a hard hit against his thigh. “Don’t think about anything but getting ahead of my movements.”
His back fingers stung as Yongguk whipped the hanbo across them. The Ranger’s glee at not having to hold back on the more inexperienced fighter was evident on his face as he replied to all of Youngjae’s attacks with even fiercer maneuvers of his own.
Yongguk was still the better fighter by far though and it didn’t take long before he had Youngjae pinned between his thighs on the ground, his stick held across Youngjae’s rapidly panting throat.
Once narrowed eyes were now wide and bright as he realized he had actually put up a pretty good fight. “I almost beat you.” He wheezed, his hands covering Yongguk’s as the Ranger was still forcing his hanbo down so tight it cut off his breath.
“I still won.” Yongguk’s voice was rough, his pupil’s blown wide from the fight.
“Barely.” He managed to push the stick off his Adam’s Apple and sucked in a much needed mouthful of air. “Next time I’ll be better.”
Yongguk tilted his head to the side curiously. “Already looking to next time, Dr. Yoo? Did I rile you up that much?”
Before Youngjae could answer the odd question he heard Jongup’s amused laughter in the doorway. Yongguk begrudgingly climbed off of him and held out a hand which Youngjae of course slapped away.
“You two seem to be working better together.” Jongup raised an eyebrow as he leaned against the wall. “I’d almost say you were in sync.”
“I wouldn’t go that far.” Youngjae muttered, grabbing his gym bag. “I’m going to go clean up before we start the neural bridge again.” He pushed past the other two and headed towards his quarters. “Stupid cocky bastard.”
---
His heartbeat was rising again as he gazed up at Jokomato from the viewing area near its belly. The Conn-Pod in its head was open and he could see Yongguk already inside being strapped into the harness. As if he knew he was being watched, his dark eyes glanced downwards and he had the audacity to wink towards him.
With a huff of annoyance he climbed the rest of the way up the stairs, completely ignoring Yongguk’s probing stare. “We ready to start?” He asked Himchan on the screen in front of them. Himchan nodded briefly before the tech’s helped him into his uniform and started attaching him to Joko.
“Youngjae?” Yongguk waited until they had walked away to grab the caps before he spoke up. “Look, about the last Drift-“
“It’s fine.” He brushed him off with a wave of his hand, eyes staring stonily towards the front. “I know you saw everything.”
“But I don’t want you to think that what I saw affects us in anyway.” Yongguk continued as his hand crept towards him. “Our neural handshake was strong and-“
The tech’s interrupted whatever he was about to say as they re-entered Joko’s head with the caps in their hands.
“You two ready?” Himchan appeared again on the screen. “Initiating the bridge.”
The caps were placed over their heads and the Drift started almost immediately. Youngjae bit down onto his tongue as the vertigo enveloped him and the only thing that stopped him from getting lost in the memories again was Yongguk’s calm voice in his ear.
“I’m right here. Don’t drown in your head, kid. Stay with me.”
His eyes finally focused and he turned his head to see Yongguk’s slow, easy smile. “I did it.”
Yongguk nodded. “You did. Good job. Now let’s see if we can move around a little easier.”
This time the Drift was stronger with both of them fully concentrating on their connection.
“I’m sorry for pushing you so far earlier.” Yongguk’s voice in his head was regretful. “I knew the only way to get you to fully fight me was if you were set off.”
“And you couldn’t apologize to me face to face?”
A chuckle sounded next to him and he risked a glance at Yongguk’s face. “Wouldn’t match my image now would it?”
“Bastard.”
“Now, now JaeJae. Don’t be mean to the man that knows all of your secrets.”
An image of himself at a thirteen year old entered his head, hand hot and slick in the dim room as he watched one of the movies he had downloaded to his computer.
“Gotta admit, I never pegged you for a masochist. Gay, I kinda picked up on. But whips and chains, man? That’s hardcore.”
Hot anger filled his brain and even though the rational side of him knew Yongguk was doing this to bring out his fighter again he still kind of hated him for laughing at his private moments. The second they were out of these harnesses he was going t-
“I never once laughed at you.” He was hit with one of Yongguk’s memories, of a younger and more clean-cut Bang Yongguk, hands buried wrist deep down the front of some faceless boy’s jeans. The other boy’s moans faded until all he could hear was Yongguk’s harsh breaths, front teeth digging into his full bottom lip as he lay sprawled out over the other’s body. “Like what you see, kid?”
He jerked to attention after realizing he had been watching the scene play out in his head for so long that Jokomato had ceased moving and Himchan was yelling angrily into the Conn-Pod.
And that was when Youngjae knew certain that he was really and truly fucked.
---
“Come on Youngjae!” Yongguk chased him as he ran towards his room trying desperately to get away from the older man. “I didn’t mean to piss you off so badly! Would you just listen to me?”
Youngjae reached his room and shakily inserted his key card, realized it was the wrong direction and was attempting it again when Yongguk caught up, hand slamming the door closed.
“Move.” He tried to sound demanding but it came out more like a whimper.
“I’m sorry.” Yongguk gripped his wrist and turned him so that he could see the honesty in his expression. “You left your mind wide open while you were watching and you might have accidentally projected some of your more personal thoughts on to me.” He winced and Youngjae knew he was mentally berating himself for his stupidity. “I didn’t know you were a virgin, Youngjae. It was thoughtless of me to push my feelings onto you.”
His eyes widened at the memory of Yongguk’s final thought in his mind. The attempt to get away from him after what he had seen was so overwhelming that he hadn’t even paid attention to anything else. But now he remembered the soft words spoken inside him, the feel of Yongguk caressing his mind as he mentally transferred Youngjae’s flushed face overtop the moaning boy’s.
“Yongguk?” He knew Yongguk was still connected to him, his fingertips vibrated with the need to reconnect them. The Drift had been cut off so abruptly that they both were shaking. Yongguk’s pupils were dilated and he had chewed his bottom lip into a bloody mess. “I don’t understand…” He took a step backwards into his room as Yongguk took one determined one towards him. “But you hate me?”
A manic grin curled up Yongguk’s mouth and Youngjae realized he had stepped so far into his dorm that Yongguk was completely inside now and he felt a tiny spark of fear. “We hate that which we often fear.” He murmured as he reached behind him to shut and lock the door.
Youngjae swallowed heavily, his hands twitching behind his back with the desire to find out what Yongguk’s skin felt like. It had to be the residual effects of the Drift, he assured himself. Yongguk was still projecting and that had to be the only reason. “William Shakespeare.” He tried to make his voice calm but the slight tremble didn’t pass unnoticed by Yongguk’s sharp ears. “Who knew the brawler read Shakespeare?”
“There’s a lot about me you don’t know.” Yongguk’s voice was seductive, the smooth tones licking their way across Youngjae’s skin. “I can show you.”
He closed his eyes and breathed deeply through his nose, hoping that if he removed the image of Yongguk leering needily at him that it would calm his heartbeat and force the want out of his veins.
“We’re still Drifting, Youngjae.” He whined embarrassingly at the warmth that was suddenly pressed flat against him, Yongguk’s lips tracing the shell of his ear. “Can you feel it? The Drift keeps our minds connected even if the machines are gone.” Fingers walked their way up the bottom of his t-shirt only to smooth across his bare skin. “You’re projecting your thoughts all over the building right now.”
The rational side of Youngjae, however small that was right now, was telling him to wipe that cocky tone right out of Yongguk’s voice, but the longer he stood frozen the harder it was to hear that tiny voice of reason. He opened his eyes to a view of Yongguk’s broad shoulders as the older man worked his way from Youngjae’s ears and down the curve of his jaw. When he felt a tongue flick teasingly over his fluttering pulse he couldn’t stop the whimper that burst out of his lips. He had never known that could be a point of arousal, but the wet tip tickling his skin made all reservations fly out of the window.
“Drift with me.” Yongguk whispered. He sat down on the edge of the book and pulled Youngjae forward to sprawl across his legs. The restraint it took to hold himself back at the sight of Youngjae’s flushed cheeks and parted lips was huge, every cell in his body was aching by this point. He’d be lying if he had said he hadn’t noticed Youngjae around the building these last few months of training. Keeping him out of that secret was an exercise in strength during their times together in Jokomato. But right now he wanted nothing more than to just give in and take what he wanted. “Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed for any of us anymore. This could be our only chance.”
He wanted to laugh at Yongguk’s cheesy pick-up lines but they both knew it was true. Now that the Kaiju were coming bigger and faster the Jaeger’s wouldn’t be able to keep up for very long. Eventually the monsters were going to overtake them and they wouldn’t be able to defend themselves. Every one of them could die tomorrow.
Yongguk let out a muffled oomph as Youngjae shoved him backwards and crawled over his body, lips seeking his with no regrets. He prodded at the corner of Youngjae’s mouth with the tip of his tongue until he was welcomed in and then it was all teeth and it was sloppy and Yongguk couldn’t imagine a better first kiss. It was obvious that Youngjae was inexperienced but he more than made up for it with enthusiasm and the soft mewls he made against Yongguk’s mouth.
A swift roll had Youngjae on his back with his legs spread and Yongguk’s palms curled around his hips as he lapped at his pulse point again causing Youngjae to desperately pant his name into the quiet room.
“Pants.” He managed to choke out as his fingers fumbled around the button on Yongguk’s uniform until the older man sat up and pushed his hands away to do it himself.
Yongguk was still sending him images in his head of everywhere he wanted to touch and all the different patches of skin he wanted to taste and a split second of wondering just how strong their Drift capabilities were if he was still able to do this even when the bridge was disconnected flashed through his head as Yongguk yanked his own uniform pants to his ankles. But a sharp bite to the inside of his thigh stopped the thoughts from going forward and all he wanted in this instant was to feel Yongguk’s bare skin pressed against his as he fucked him hard against the bed.
“Shit.” Yongguk took a break from working their shirts off to drop his head forward and take a ragged breath. “I’m not going to last long if you keep throwing those kind of thoughts at me.”
He sent him a snapshot of himself on his knees, face buried against Yongguk’s soft skin as he gripped tightly into Youngjae’s shaggy hair and he even managed to conjure the lewd sounds he remembered from the videos that were still saved and password protected on his computer.
With a warning growl Yongguk finally managed to rip his shirt over his head and dropped down with a thud, his heart beating wildly against Youngjae’s chest. “That’s going to have to wait until tomorrow.” He promised, slurping obscenely on his fingers before removing them with a loud pop.
“I thought you said we weren’t promised tomorrow?” He winced at the first initial burn but managed to stay relaxed and calm. “And I have lube in the drawer you could have used.”
“You little fuck.” Yongguk nipped playfully at his lips, one finger quickly turning to two. “I can see you remembering doing this to yourself. And I meant it when I said we’re not guaranteed anything.” Well versed fingertips pressed just right against him to make Youngjae’s legs fall farther open and his eyes to roll back into his head. “But if you’re promising that will happen then I will kill the Kaiju with my bare fucking hands to come back and get it.”
When he was sure Youngjae was ready he removed his fingers and grabbed for the bottle Youngjae had mentioned in his drawer. It took longer to completely place himself inside Youngjae than it did for most of his other partners. They had mainly been random people he had met in his years in the program, people he would never see again.
But Youngjae was his partner.
“I’m not made of glass.” Youngjae huffed. His thighs squeezed tighter around Yongguk’s hips and he let out a breath of relief when Yongguk was finally seated inside of him.
After a few moments he managed to roll his hips upwards causing Yongguk’s muscles to tighten and his lips to thin as he glared testily from up above him. “Stop asking me to treat you like them in your head.” He ordered, palm cupping Youngjae’s ruddy cheek and starting to rock slowly forward. “Next time.” His voice cracked when Youngjae interrupted him to lift his bottom of the bed and meet him thrust for thrust. “God, I thought you were a virgin?”
“I watch… a lot of movies…” Youngjae panted.
Youngjae? Youngjae what are you doing? Where is Yongguk, why isn’t he pulling them out?
“What was th-?”
“Just ignore it.” Yongguk pressed open mouthed kisses against his collarbones as he shifted to lift Youngjae’s leg against his shoulder making all of Youngjae’s questions disappear and leaving Yongguk’s name the only thought in his head. “Concentrate only on me.”
He didn’t need to tell him that, all Youngjae could think about right now was the feel of Yongguk’s hips dragging slowly up and down the back of his thighs as he groaned hotly against his skin. He scraped his nails down Yongguk’s back just to hear the strangled gasps full of pain over and over and why didn’t anyone tell him that sex with your Jaeger partner wasn’t only physical, it was mental as well?
“Stop thinking so hard.” A chuckle vibrated his neck and Yongguk pulled away far enough to grab at his other leg, lifting it to hang over his other shoulder and grabbing at Youngjae’s arms to hold him in place. As hot as the boy’s crazed bucking and full-body shaking was, he was having a hard time building up a steady rhythm because of it. “Shh Jae, shh.”
Yongguk’s grip around his arms was the only thing stopping him from floating away but it wasn’t enough, he needed more. He breathed out Yongguk’s name and hoped he would be able to figure out what he needed. The slight shift and higher tilt of the other’s hips was instantaneous, Yongguk having to tighten his hold on Youngjae’s arms as his body started to tighten and his fingers opened and closed trying to reach between their bellies.
“No. Don’t touch yourself.” Yongguk released him to bat his hand away and do it himself, his movements rough and fast with calloused palms that scraped across Youngjae’s sensitive skin in ways that made electicity current through his body. “I’m going to lose it soon.” He told him honestly, trapping his lip between his teeth and using the painful pricks to distract himself from the bubbling heat in his belly.
Should we bring in the doctors?
No, give Yongguk a little more time. He’s probably explaining things.
By the time he had Youngjae gasping loudly and screaming his name out as the liquid warmth smeared across their stomachs, he was close to tipping over the edge. Youngjae’s legs were thrown off of his shoulders to the bed and Yongguk grabbed him by his hips again, thumbs pressing against the thin skin so deeply that Youngjae tried but failed to tell him to loosen his grip. He may not have been as vocal as the other boy, but Youngjae was still feeling tingles inside of his body by the soft phrases under Yongguk’s breath about all of the things he was going to do to him next time.
The thought that next time sounded pretty amazing that Youngjae projected into his own brain was what drove him to release with a deep growl, his body slowing and finally stilling and collapsing overtop of Youngjae.
“I’m sorry.” He muttered against Youngjae’s sweat-slicked chest.
“For what?” Youngjae was so tired but he couldn’t seem to make himself rest. Every time he closed his eyes and tried to drift off into sleep his body felt wide awake and alert.
Youngjae! Yongguk!
He sat up with a gasp, pushing Yongguk off in shock. “There! What was that? I heard it again!”
Yongguk’s face was guilty and he had the nerve to shrug his shoulders apologetically. “Please don’t be mad?”
With astonishment he realized he could feel Yongguk mentally tugging on him, trying to pull him out of his dorm.
Once he figured out what was happening he made sure to get one solid punch on Yongguk’s cheek before they slowly regained awareness back in the Conn-Pod.
---
“Stupid Ranger with this stupid impressive mind talents.” Youngjae hissed angrily under his breath as he stalked back to his dorm after supper that night, his real dorm this time. He had promptly unhooked himself from Jokomato after Yongguk humiliated him and hadn’t looked his way since. Even if he could feel the regret rolling over his partner in waves he wasn’t going to give him the dignity of looking at him. “Stupid bastards who trick you into sleeping with them.”
“In my defense, there was no tricking involved.” Yongguk’s voice startled him into dropping the foam cup of coffee in his hands.
He looked down at the mess on the floor and sighed. “I’m not cleaning that up.”
Yongguk waved it off. “Someone will come along soon and see it. Can we talk?”
Even if he just wanted to go to bed and pretend this whole day never happened and that he wasn’t currently standing in front of the man who he had just a few hours ago imagined inside of him, he knew Yongguk wouldn’t go away until he had a chance to explain himself. “Five minutes.”
“I’m sorry.” Was the only thing Yongguk could think to say to him. “I’m really, really sorry.”
He rolled his eyes and pointed at the door. “Not good enough. Now get out.”
Yongguk slammed the open door shut and stood in front of it crossing his arms threateningly over his chest. “I’m not leaving until you forgive me! Look, I’ve been a Jaeger pilot for a long time. I know the ins and outs of Drifting. I’m sorry that I fucked with your head but it was the only way for you to accept me! If I wasn’t already in your brain and reassuring you everything was alright then you never would have let me in!”
“And how do you know that?” He cried, stomping his foot on the floor like a child. “Did you ever make me think you wanted that from me at all? Did you ever treat me like a human or just belittle and smartass me every second? Maybe I would have surprised you!” He could feel his temper rising and wanted nothing more than to just slam Yongguk’s head against the door and make him cry.
“Try it.” Yongguk’s lip curled up and Youngjae recognized the stubborn glint in the man’s eyes. “I dare you to try and hurt me.” At Youngjae’s silent response he snorted and dropped his hands. “I knew the great genius Yoo Youngjae didn’t have the balls to attack anyone. That’s your problem, Jae. You always do what you think you’re supposed to, never what you want.” His eyelids dropped until all Youngjae could see was blackness and he smirked. “What do you want, Youngjae?”
His answer was quick, the blood already rushing to his head and making him dizzy. “To hurt you.”
Yongguk spread his arms to the sides and cocked an eyebrow up. “Then hurt me.”
But he couldn’t. Not until he knew where they stood. Youngjae may have known the end of the world was imminent, but that didn’t mean he didn’t have feelings. “And the Kaiju? What happens if-?”
“What happens is Jokomato can go down with us hating each other.” He grabbed Youngjae’s hand and pulled him flush against him, breath smelling like beer and hamburgers and salt and desperation. “Or we can go down together. As a team."
“And if we win? If we defeat the Kaiju?”
Yongguk’s slow smile was patient. “Then we find some other place to fight like ten year olds. Personally I like the beach. It’d be real relaxing to throw your nagging ass into the ocean several times.”
Youngjae shook his head, already knowing he had lost this go around but still not yet wanting to give up. “The mountains. It’s better for my research if I’m alone and it’s quiet.”
Yongguk shut him up with a press of his lips, eyelashes fluttering against Youngjae’s cheeks. “Mountains it is then.”