Murder! In the Castle of Queen Daphne
BOSONOI
HERE IS YOUR FOOD. BUT DON'T EAT THE APPLE.
CHIPILLA
WHY NOT?
BOSONOI
BECAUSE THE QUEEN POISONED IT -- I AM FAIRLY CERTAIN, AT LEAST, I SAW THE COOK HANDLING IT SUSPICIOUSLY.
CHIPILLA
WHY DO WE TOLERATE A QUEEN THAT POISONS HER SUBJECTS WITH SUCH ALARMING FREQUENCY? I MUST THANK YOU, BY THE WAY.
BOSONOI
OF COURSE. AND WE TOLERATE HER BECAUSE SHE COULD KILL ANY OF US IF SHE WISHED TO, YOU KNOW THAT.
CHIPILLA
DOES SHE KNOW YOU KNOW?
BOSONOI
DEFINATELY NOT. I WAS SPYING.
CHIPILLA
I HAVE A PLAN. FEED HER THIS APPLE.
BOSONOI
BUT THEN WHAT WILL WE DO? WITHOUT A QUEEN?
CHIPILLA
DON'T WORRY. WE'LL JUST HAVE THE CASTLE TO OURSELVES.
QUEEN DAPHNE
HM? WHAT'S THIS ABOUT HAVING THE CASTLE TO YOURSELVES?
BOSONOI
WE WERE JUST DISCUSSING WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE IF YOU WEREN'T HERE. I WAS THINKING ABOUT HOW WE WOULD BE LEADERLESS, BUT CHIPILLA HERE THINKS IT WOULDN'T BE SO BAD. MAGESTY, IF YOU WOULD ENLIGHTEN US BOTH, IT WOULD SETTLE OUR DISCUSSION TO KNOW FROM YOUR WISDOM HOW WE WOULD FARE WITHOUT A QUEEN TO WATCH OVER US AND COMMAND US. WOULD LIFE BE BETTER, OR WORSE, FOR US?
QUEEN DAPHNE
YOU MUST NATURALLY EXPECT ME TO ANSWER OUT OF SELFISH SELF-INTEREST AND WITH IGNORANCE THAT YOU DO NOT SINCERELY PUT FAITH IN MY RESPONSE. I FIND YOUR QUESTION TO BE INSUBORDINATE NOT DUE TO ITS SUBJECT MATTER BUT BECAUSE OF YOUR OBVIOUS TRANSPARENCY OF DELIVERY. BILLION TOVALD BOSONOI, I EXPECT HONESTY AND FORTHRIGHTNESS FROM MY SERVANTS IF THEY CANNOT BRING THEMSELVES TO SINCERELY PLACE FAITH IN ME. TO CLOUD YOUR FEELINGS BEHIND A SHIELD OF DECEPTION IS NOT TOLERABLE.
BOSONOI
MAGESTY, I CAN DO NOTHING BUT APOLOGIZE. I WILL NOT INSULT YOU BY DENYING WHAT YOU HAVE SEEN.
QUEEN DAPHNE
MISTRESS CHIPILLA, WHY HAVE YOU NOT EATEN YOUR APPLE? YOU EXPRESSED GREAT HUNGER AND I KNOW YOU TO LOVE APPLES.
CHIPILLA
MAGESTY, MASTER BOSONOI HAS TOLD ME THAT HE SUSPECTS YOU HAVE POISONED THIS APPLE. THIS IS THE CAUSE FOR OUR DISCUSSION. IT IS VERY DISTRESSING FOR US THAT YOUR SUBJECTS ARE FREQUENTLY POISONED, AND IT STRAINS OUR FAITH AND CONFIDENCE IN YOU DESPITE YOUR STATUS AND DIVINE SELECTION. I CANNOT SAFELY EAT THIS APPLE WHILE SUSPICIONS ARE IN PLAY THAT I COULD BE POISONED BY EATING IT.
BOSONOI
ER--
QUEEN DAPHNE
MISTRESS CHIPILLA, YOU KNOW AS WELL AS ANYONE THAT I DO NOT POISON MY SUBJECTS. AND IF I WERE GOING TO, I WOULD POISON THIS INSOLENT FOOL WHO TOLD YOU THAT YOUR APPLE WAS POISONED LONG BEFORE A LOYAL SUBJECT LIKE YOU.
CHIPILLA
MAGESTY, I BELIEVE YOU BUT STILL FEEL ENOUGH DOUBT TO FOREGO EATING MY APPLE. IT IS TRUE THAT MANY OF YOUR SUBJECTS DO TURN OUT TO BE POISONED. I DO NOT WISH TO EXPRESS DOUBT TO YOU BUT I DO NOT WISH TO LIE TO YOU EITHER.
QUEEN DAPHNE
IT DOES NOT PLEASE ME TO DO THIS, BUT GIVE ME THE APPLE. I WILL EAT IT, AND PROVE TO YOU THAT I HAVE NOT POISONED IT. PERHAPS THEN YOU WILL HAVE YOUR FAITH RESTORED IN ME, AND YOU WILL STOP LISTENING TO THE INSUBORDINATE MASTER BOSONOI REGARDING MY ACTIONS.
CHIPILLA
THANK YOU, MAGESTY.
QUEEN DAPHNE
AUGH! IT IS POISONED! WHO DID THIS? UGH...
BOSONOI
OH! I KNEW IT!
CHIPILLA
YOU ARE DENSE, BOSONOI, BUT NOT DENSE ENOUGH TO FOOL ME. HOW COULD YOU POISON THE QUEEN?
BOSONOI
I DIDN'T! YOU WERE THE ONE THAT TALKED OF POISONING HER!
CHIPILLA
TO PLACATE YOU AND FISH OUT YOUR MOTIVATIONS. WE HAVE KNOWN YOU WOULD BETRAY HER FOR A LONG TIME, BUT WE HAD NO IDEA THAT YOU WOULD GO TO SUCH BACKSTABBING LENGTHS TO DO SO. ALL THESE POISONINGS HAVE ALL BEEN ATTEMPTS TO GET TO HER, HAVE THEY? ALL BY YOU?
QUEEN DAPHNE
SO... YOU KILLED ME...
BOSONOI
YOU'RE GOING TO MURDER ME, AREN'T YOU? I'M WITNESS TO YOUR CRIME! YOU WISH TO SET ME UP! HELLO? ANYONE? HELP! CHIPILLA HAS POISONED THE QUEEN!
CHIPILLA
MAGESTY, TAKE EASE. SEVERAL OTHERS WHO WERE POISONED HAVE RECOVERED, I AM SURE YOU WILL TOO, YOU ARE STRONG. BUT WE MUST GET DOCTOR FASLO HERE. TRAITOR, STAND ASIDE.
BOSONOI
WHAT?
CHIPILLA
IF YOU WILL NOT STAND ASIDE AND ALLOW ME TO FETCH THE DOCTOR, I WILL FORCE YOU TO.
BOSONOI
I AM NOT STOPPING YOU! GO! GET THE DOCTOR!
CHIPILLA
THEN WHY HAVE YOU BRANDISHED A KNIFE TO ME? NEVER MIND, YOU FOUL BEAST, YOU WILL DIE BY YOUR OWN BLADE!
BOSONOI
AAUUUGGHHH! COUGH
QUEEN DAPHNE
MISTRESS... WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?
CHIPILLA
YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN GOOD TO US, MAGESTY. I WILL NOT LET YOU DIE OVER THIS TRAITOR'S ACTIONS, EVEN IF IT MEANS HIS BLOOD. STAY, I WILL RETURN SHORTLY.
QUEEN DAPHNE
UGH...
DOCTOR FALSO
YOUR MAGESTY! OH MY GOD, ARE YOU ALRIGHT?
QUEEN DAPHNE
N-NO...
CHIPILLA
PLEASE, DOCTOR, CAN YOU HELP HER?
DOCTOR FALSO
I WILL TRY! DO NOT DISTRACT ME! AND DO SOMETHING WITH THE BODY! MY GOD!
CHIPILLA
MY HANDS ARE ALREADY FOUL FROM DRIVING IN THE BLADE TO HIM, I WILL FETCH GUARDS TO SECURE THE ROOM AND CLEAN UP IN MY STEAD.
DOCTOR FALSO
WAIT, WHAT KIND OF POISON WAS IT?
CHIPILLA
I DON'T KNOW! THE SAME KIND THAT THE OTHERS WERE POISONED WITH, PROBABLY!
DOCTOR FALSO
ACARDIAN FISHBREAKER OIL? ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY SURE?
CHIPILLA
NO, BUT I'VE STABBED THE ONLY ONE THAT WOULD BE ABLE TO TELL US. CAN YOU DO SOME SORT OF CHECK?
DOCTOR FALSO
THERE ISN'T TIME, SHE'S GETTING WORSE. I CAN TREAT THAT FORM OF POISON, BUT I NEED MEDICINE FROM MY CHEST. I NEED TO GET IT MYSELF.
CHIPILLA
WHY YOURSELF?
DOCTOR FALSO
BECAUSE THEY AREN'T LABELED! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS!
CHIPILLA
GIVE ME DIRECTIONS AND I'LL DO IT. THEN YOU CAN DO THE CHECK TO MAKE SURE IT'S THE RIGHT STUFF. I'VE HEARD THE WRONG MEDICINE CAN DO BAD THINGS.
DOCTOR FALSO
THAT'S EXACTLY WHY IT MUST BE ME AND NOBODY ELSE THAT GETS THE MEDICINE.
CHIPILLA
AT LEAST LET ME GET A GUARD TO HELP HER FIRST, SOMEONE MUST STAY WITH THE QUEEN AND I CAN'T STOMACH ALL THIS BLOOD.
DOCTOR FALSO
DAMN YOU PATHETIC WOMAN! STOP TRYING TO STALL ME! GET YOUR GUARD, BUT I'M LEAVING NOW!
CHIPILLA
WAIT! AGH, NO... FINE... MAGESTY, ARE YOU AWAKE?
QUEEN DAPHNE
MOTHER?
CHIPILLA
YES, DAPHNE, I'M YOUR MOTHER.
QUEEN DAPHNE
WHAT'S THAT?
CHIPILLA
WHAT'S WHAT?
QUEEN DAPHNE
THIS?
CHIPILLA
WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS?
QUEEN DAPHNE
CAN'T YOU SEE IT?
CHIPILLA
I'M SORRY, I DON'T SEE ANYTHING.
QUEEN DAPHNE
...MISTRESS...?
CHIPILLA
YES, IT'S MISTRESS CHIPILLA.
QUEEN DAPHNE
I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU WERE MY MOTHER?
CHIPILLA
MAGESTY, YOU'VE BEEN POISONED AND ARE DELUSIONAL. I AM TRYING TO KEEP YOU COMFORTABLE. I APOLOGIZE. MAGESTY, PLEASE EXCUSE ME, I NEED TO GET YOU GUARDS TO PROTECT YOU.
GUARD
MY GOD...
CHIPILLA
PLEASE, KEEP HER COMFORTABLE, I CAN'T STAND THE BLOOD. I'LL BE OUTSIDE. DOCTAR FALSO WILL BE HERE SOON. HE SAYS HE MAY BE ABLE TO HELP.
DOCTOR FALSO
SOLDIER, STEP ASIDE, I NEED TO TEND TO THE QUEEN.
GUARD
SIR.
DOCTOR FALSO
DAMN, SHE'S UNCONSCIOUS.
GUARD
SIR?
DOCTOR FALSO
NO, I'M TOO LATE. IT WENT FASTER THAN BEFORE. SHE'S DEAD. HOW CAN THIS BE? ACARDIAN FISHBREAKER OIL DOESN'T ACT THIS FAST. OR CREATE THESE RASHES... DAMN, THESE ARE NEW. SOLDIER, WHO DID THIS?
GUARD
NOBODY HAS SEEN HER SINCE I ARRIVED, SIR. YOU WILL HAVE TO QUESTION THE MISTRESS CHIPILLA FOR MORE INFORMATION.
Poll Murder in the Castle of Queen Daphne
HERE IS YOUR FOOD. BUT DON'T EAT THE APPLE.
CHIPILLA
WHY NOT?
BOSONOI
BECAUSE THE QUEEN POISONED IT -- I AM FAIRLY CERTAIN, AT LEAST, I SAW THE COOK HANDLING IT SUSPICIOUSLY.
CHIPILLA
WHY DO WE TOLERATE A QUEEN THAT POISONS HER SUBJECTS WITH SUCH ALARMING FREQUENCY? I MUST THANK YOU, BY THE WAY.
BOSONOI
OF COURSE. AND WE TOLERATE HER BECAUSE SHE COULD KILL ANY OF US IF SHE WISHED TO, YOU KNOW THAT.
CHIPILLA
DOES SHE KNOW YOU KNOW?
BOSONOI
DEFINATELY NOT. I WAS SPYING.
CHIPILLA
I HAVE A PLAN. FEED HER THIS APPLE.
BOSONOI
BUT THEN WHAT WILL WE DO? WITHOUT A QUEEN?
CHIPILLA
DON'T WORRY. WE'LL JUST HAVE THE CASTLE TO OURSELVES.
QUEEN DAPHNE
HM? WHAT'S THIS ABOUT HAVING THE CASTLE TO YOURSELVES?
BOSONOI
WE WERE JUST DISCUSSING WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE IF YOU WEREN'T HERE. I WAS THINKING ABOUT HOW WE WOULD BE LEADERLESS, BUT CHIPILLA HERE THINKS IT WOULDN'T BE SO BAD. MAGESTY, IF YOU WOULD ENLIGHTEN US BOTH, IT WOULD SETTLE OUR DISCUSSION TO KNOW FROM YOUR WISDOM HOW WE WOULD FARE WITHOUT A QUEEN TO WATCH OVER US AND COMMAND US. WOULD LIFE BE BETTER, OR WORSE, FOR US?
QUEEN DAPHNE
YOU MUST NATURALLY EXPECT ME TO ANSWER OUT OF SELFISH SELF-INTEREST AND WITH IGNORANCE THAT YOU DO NOT SINCERELY PUT FAITH IN MY RESPONSE. I FIND YOUR QUESTION TO BE INSUBORDINATE NOT DUE TO ITS SUBJECT MATTER BUT BECAUSE OF YOUR OBVIOUS TRANSPARENCY OF DELIVERY. BILLION TOVALD BOSONOI, I EXPECT HONESTY AND FORTHRIGHTNESS FROM MY SERVANTS IF THEY CANNOT BRING THEMSELVES TO SINCERELY PLACE FAITH IN ME. TO CLOUD YOUR FEELINGS BEHIND A SHIELD OF DECEPTION IS NOT TOLERABLE.
BOSONOI
MAGESTY, I CAN DO NOTHING BUT APOLOGIZE. I WILL NOT INSULT YOU BY DENYING WHAT YOU HAVE SEEN.
QUEEN DAPHNE
MISTRESS CHIPILLA, WHY HAVE YOU NOT EATEN YOUR APPLE? YOU EXPRESSED GREAT HUNGER AND I KNOW YOU TO LOVE APPLES.
CHIPILLA
MAGESTY, MASTER BOSONOI HAS TOLD ME THAT HE SUSPECTS YOU HAVE POISONED THIS APPLE. THIS IS THE CAUSE FOR OUR DISCUSSION. IT IS VERY DISTRESSING FOR US THAT YOUR SUBJECTS ARE FREQUENTLY POISONED, AND IT STRAINS OUR FAITH AND CONFIDENCE IN YOU DESPITE YOUR STATUS AND DIVINE SELECTION. I CANNOT SAFELY EAT THIS APPLE WHILE SUSPICIONS ARE IN PLAY THAT I COULD BE POISONED BY EATING IT.
BOSONOI
ER--
QUEEN DAPHNE
MISTRESS CHIPILLA, YOU KNOW AS WELL AS ANYONE THAT I DO NOT POISON MY SUBJECTS. AND IF I WERE GOING TO, I WOULD POISON THIS INSOLENT FOOL WHO TOLD YOU THAT YOUR APPLE WAS POISONED LONG BEFORE A LOYAL SUBJECT LIKE YOU.
CHIPILLA
MAGESTY, I BELIEVE YOU BUT STILL FEEL ENOUGH DOUBT TO FOREGO EATING MY APPLE. IT IS TRUE THAT MANY OF YOUR SUBJECTS DO TURN OUT TO BE POISONED. I DO NOT WISH TO EXPRESS DOUBT TO YOU BUT I DO NOT WISH TO LIE TO YOU EITHER.
QUEEN DAPHNE
IT DOES NOT PLEASE ME TO DO THIS, BUT GIVE ME THE APPLE. I WILL EAT IT, AND PROVE TO YOU THAT I HAVE NOT POISONED IT. PERHAPS THEN YOU WILL HAVE YOUR FAITH RESTORED IN ME, AND YOU WILL STOP LISTENING TO THE INSUBORDINATE MASTER BOSONOI REGARDING MY ACTIONS.
CHIPILLA
THANK YOU, MAGESTY.
QUEEN DAPHNE
AUGH! IT IS POISONED! WHO DID THIS? UGH...
BOSONOI
OH! I KNEW IT!
CHIPILLA
YOU ARE DENSE, BOSONOI, BUT NOT DENSE ENOUGH TO FOOL ME. HOW COULD YOU POISON THE QUEEN?
BOSONOI
I DIDN'T! YOU WERE THE ONE THAT TALKED OF POISONING HER!
CHIPILLA
TO PLACATE YOU AND FISH OUT YOUR MOTIVATIONS. WE HAVE KNOWN YOU WOULD BETRAY HER FOR A LONG TIME, BUT WE HAD NO IDEA THAT YOU WOULD GO TO SUCH BACKSTABBING LENGTHS TO DO SO. ALL THESE POISONINGS HAVE ALL BEEN ATTEMPTS TO GET TO HER, HAVE THEY? ALL BY YOU?
QUEEN DAPHNE
SO... YOU KILLED ME...
BOSONOI
YOU'RE GOING TO MURDER ME, AREN'T YOU? I'M WITNESS TO YOUR CRIME! YOU WISH TO SET ME UP! HELLO? ANYONE? HELP! CHIPILLA HAS POISONED THE QUEEN!
CHIPILLA
MAGESTY, TAKE EASE. SEVERAL OTHERS WHO WERE POISONED HAVE RECOVERED, I AM SURE YOU WILL TOO, YOU ARE STRONG. BUT WE MUST GET DOCTOR FASLO HERE. TRAITOR, STAND ASIDE.
BOSONOI
WHAT?
CHIPILLA
IF YOU WILL NOT STAND ASIDE AND ALLOW ME TO FETCH THE DOCTOR, I WILL FORCE YOU TO.
BOSONOI
I AM NOT STOPPING YOU! GO! GET THE DOCTOR!
CHIPILLA
THEN WHY HAVE YOU BRANDISHED A KNIFE TO ME? NEVER MIND, YOU FOUL BEAST, YOU WILL DIE BY YOUR OWN BLADE!
BOSONOI
AAUUUGGHHH! COUGH
QUEEN DAPHNE
MISTRESS... WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?
CHIPILLA
YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN GOOD TO US, MAGESTY. I WILL NOT LET YOU DIE OVER THIS TRAITOR'S ACTIONS, EVEN IF IT MEANS HIS BLOOD. STAY, I WILL RETURN SHORTLY.
QUEEN DAPHNE
UGH...
DOCTOR FALSO
YOUR MAGESTY! OH MY GOD, ARE YOU ALRIGHT?
QUEEN DAPHNE
N-NO...
CHIPILLA
PLEASE, DOCTOR, CAN YOU HELP HER?
DOCTOR FALSO
I WILL TRY! DO NOT DISTRACT ME! AND DO SOMETHING WITH THE BODY! MY GOD!
CHIPILLA
MY HANDS ARE ALREADY FOUL FROM DRIVING IN THE BLADE TO HIM, I WILL FETCH GUARDS TO SECURE THE ROOM AND CLEAN UP IN MY STEAD.
DOCTOR FALSO
WAIT, WHAT KIND OF POISON WAS IT?
CHIPILLA
I DON'T KNOW! THE SAME KIND THAT THE OTHERS WERE POISONED WITH, PROBABLY!
DOCTOR FALSO
ACARDIAN FISHBREAKER OIL? ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY SURE?
CHIPILLA
NO, BUT I'VE STABBED THE ONLY ONE THAT WOULD BE ABLE TO TELL US. CAN YOU DO SOME SORT OF CHECK?
DOCTOR FALSO
THERE ISN'T TIME, SHE'S GETTING WORSE. I CAN TREAT THAT FORM OF POISON, BUT I NEED MEDICINE FROM MY CHEST. I NEED TO GET IT MYSELF.
CHIPILLA
WHY YOURSELF?
DOCTOR FALSO
BECAUSE THEY AREN'T LABELED! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS!
CHIPILLA
GIVE ME DIRECTIONS AND I'LL DO IT. THEN YOU CAN DO THE CHECK TO MAKE SURE IT'S THE RIGHT STUFF. I'VE HEARD THE WRONG MEDICINE CAN DO BAD THINGS.
DOCTOR FALSO
THAT'S EXACTLY WHY IT MUST BE ME AND NOBODY ELSE THAT GETS THE MEDICINE.
CHIPILLA
AT LEAST LET ME GET A GUARD TO HELP HER FIRST, SOMEONE MUST STAY WITH THE QUEEN AND I CAN'T STOMACH ALL THIS BLOOD.
DOCTOR FALSO
DAMN YOU PATHETIC WOMAN! STOP TRYING TO STALL ME! GET YOUR GUARD, BUT I'M LEAVING NOW!
CHIPILLA
WAIT! AGH, NO... FINE... MAGESTY, ARE YOU AWAKE?
QUEEN DAPHNE
MOTHER?
CHIPILLA
YES, DAPHNE, I'M YOUR MOTHER.
QUEEN DAPHNE
WHAT'S THAT?
CHIPILLA
WHAT'S WHAT?
QUEEN DAPHNE
THIS?
CHIPILLA
WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS?
QUEEN DAPHNE
CAN'T YOU SEE IT?
CHIPILLA
I'M SORRY, I DON'T SEE ANYTHING.
QUEEN DAPHNE
...MISTRESS...?
CHIPILLA
YES, IT'S MISTRESS CHIPILLA.
QUEEN DAPHNE
I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU WERE MY MOTHER?
CHIPILLA
MAGESTY, YOU'VE BEEN POISONED AND ARE DELUSIONAL. I AM TRYING TO KEEP YOU COMFORTABLE. I APOLOGIZE. MAGESTY, PLEASE EXCUSE ME, I NEED TO GET YOU GUARDS TO PROTECT YOU.
GUARD
MY GOD...
CHIPILLA
PLEASE, KEEP HER COMFORTABLE, I CAN'T STAND THE BLOOD. I'LL BE OUTSIDE. DOCTAR FALSO WILL BE HERE SOON. HE SAYS HE MAY BE ABLE TO HELP.
DOCTOR FALSO
SOLDIER, STEP ASIDE, I NEED TO TEND TO THE QUEEN.
GUARD
SIR.
DOCTOR FALSO
DAMN, SHE'S UNCONSCIOUS.
GUARD
SIR?
DOCTOR FALSO
NO, I'M TOO LATE. IT WENT FASTER THAN BEFORE. SHE'S DEAD. HOW CAN THIS BE? ACARDIAN FISHBREAKER OIL DOESN'T ACT THIS FAST. OR CREATE THESE RASHES... DAMN, THESE ARE NEW. SOLDIER, WHO DID THIS?
GUARD
NOBODY HAS SEEN HER SINCE I ARRIVED, SIR. YOU WILL HAVE TO QUESTION THE MISTRESS CHIPILLA FOR MORE INFORMATION.
Poll Murder in the Castle of Queen Daphne