half empty. half full.
Half Empty, Half Full
Jonghyun, Kibum, a café and a glass of coffee to share. Alone.
JongKey - Fluff;Angst;ANGST - PG
Jonghyun walks, hands inside his pockets, newspaper tucked in between his armpit. He heaves out a sigh, he turns his head to the cloudy skies above. He returns his gaze to the ground, it’s too dusty, too many leaves -but it’s like any normal day. He goes inside the café, he sits down on his usual spot, orders the usual and then he reads the newspaper. Jonghyun was an infamous pianist. He’s not famous yet, but he works hard to get there. He doesn’t have a wife, or kids. He lives alone in his cold, cold apartment and a piano. It’s lonely, to be honest. There’s just no color, it’s too black and white. Sometimes, he dreams, he thinks that maybe his other half is out there somewhere. But sometimes, he just wants to give up on that. Believing, he thinks it’s foolish to believe in something that you can’t even see. It’s tiring to hope for nothing.
His coffee arrives, he puts down his newspaper. Jonghyun takes the coffee, blows then takes a little sip. The door creaks -a new customer arrives. His eyes wander off to the new comer, nothing special -he thinks. The man wore a purple, wool sweater, beige, a scarf draped loosely around his neck and some beige slacks. Classy, he thinks. Since he’s wearing leather, a shirt and jeans. The man sits down on a chair, a table apart from Jonghyun. The man grabs a magazine and he starts reading a little. Beautiful, he presumes. With eyelashes long and dark, perfect skin, beautiful everything and something about this man was just different. Jonghyun smacks himself mentally for his first impression. This man was special, very special.
Kibum is his name. He was an artist, a freelance artist. He’s actually famous around the arts industries -having over fifty art exhibitions every year. Most of them though, were for charity. A man with a good heart to children -but a cold one to those around his age. He doesn’t know why actually, it’s just he feels a lot happier with kids. Maybe it was because of a bad experience -with love and all. The waiter finally approaches him -he orders and the waiter leaves. His eyes suddenly land on Jonghyun, nothing special -he thinks. But when the man turns his head to the window beside, showing off that perfect jawline, sharp nose and those plump luscious lips. Kibum is in awe and really, he felt stupid for his first impression. When Jonghyun turns his head again, their gazes lock on each other. There, they drown into each other. Maybe it was love at first sight -but Jonghyun stopped believing. Kibum is afraid. They simultaneously put down their heads to continue “reading”.
Kibum’s coffee arrives, and he turns to the waiter. He smiles and takes the coffee, blows then takes a little sip. He puts it down and rests his elbow on the table. Jonghyun doesn’t like to play games -he’s not a patient person. He stands up, newspaper in one hand and his cup of coffee in the other. He approaches the man but he doesn’t say anything. He gulps, which caught Kibum’s attention. He turns and they lock gazes again. But Jonghyun moves his hand with coffee a bit, and smiles. Kibum’s breath hitches -he stops breathing for a second, before nodding. The pianist sits down, right across the artist and he stares again. Kibum smiles a little, and Jonghyun feels like the lost of colors in his life found their way back home.
“Jonghyun.” He mumbles.
“Kibum.” He whispers.
Then, they speak without words. The silence is comforting, very comforting. Jonghyun starts to believe again. He starts to foolishly believe in love at first sight -but he denies it. He starts to foolishly believe, that his life is not half-empty anymore, but half-full.
Kibum starts to believe as well. He starts to cowardly believe in love again -he accepts it with open arms. He starts to cowardly believe that he misses the feeling. This feeling that was an empty, hollow space in his life. He starts to cowardly believe, that his life is not half-empty anymore, but half-full.
Time is ticking, and Kibum must leave for a little meeting with some art directors. Jonghyun utters a silent “See you again.” They make secret promises to meet again, they seal it with a gaze and then, Kibum goes. Jonghyun doesn’t finish his coffee -nor did Kibum. A grin was plastered right across his face. He sighs happily and chuckles a little. He feels like a little child again, a child that was able to be with their “favorite person”. The waiter looks at him and the pianist shrugs. The waiter smiles. “He comes here often.” Jonghyun nods. “He always sits behind you though.” Jonghyun doesn’t react. His mouth forms an ‘o’ and he sighs again. “He’s very talkative.” Jonghyun, then smirks and the waiter laughs.
After two days of their initial meeting, they meet again. This time, they sit on the same table but they are still across each other. But it’s nice since they like to steal glances every now and then. The waiter could only smile at them -it was like watching those silly dramas in television -only without the drama… yet, he thinks then he sighs. Jinki hopes them the best since they most definitely deserve each other.
They meet more regularly and it almost becomes a life and death situation for them. It was as if, if they don’t meet -their worlds are half-empty. It’s incomplete, it’s nothing. Useless.
One day, Jonghyun sits alone in the table. Kibum has not yet come, and he’s worried. His cup of coffee has not been touched and his palms are getting sweaty. The door creaks and the man snaps his head to the door. Kibum is there, but his natural beauty is not there with him. Jonghyun stands up a little too hastily and walks over to him. The artist looks at him, with eyes almost pleading. “Kibum?” He asks. “I’m sorry.” The man says, Jonghyun is confused. Kibum holds his hand tightly for the first time and leads him out of the door. The waiter sighs, looks like his prayers weren’t answered.
They stop in a nearby park, Jonghyun is nervous, he has a feeling on what might happen. They stand by the fountain and Kibum cries. Jonghyun’s world starts to cry with him, but he doesn’t break down… yet. “I’m sorry.” He says again, his hands covering his mouth. The pianist takes a step forward and wraps his arms around the artist. Kibum closes his eyes and lets those tears fall down on Jonghyun’s shoulder. “I don’t get it.” The pianist says -actually he has a feeling he does. But he doesn’t want to believe it. Kibum struggles to push himself away from Jonghyun. “Goodbye.” He whispers. There, the pianist starts to fall apart. Their lips meet for a second, but everything in Jonghyun’s world stops -he can’t feel anything anymore. A tear silently trickles down his face. “I will always…” A pause, everything is gone. “… love you.” Kibum turns away and runs. He runs, because he can’t walk -he doesn’t want to savor the taste of hurt.
It was Jonghyun’s turn to cry hard. But there’s no shoulder to lean on, there’s nothing. Just air, just the rain -wait. It’s not raining, he’s crying. He then shouts, he shouts because honestly he doesn’t know what to do anymore. Someone finally comes in his life which makes everything seem so worthwhile after so many years and he loses it within a second. Kibum, who was now trying to get lost in the street stops. His feet can’t move -he's too tired. Tears are still trickling down his face, it won’t stop, he doesn’t want to stop. He doesn’t really care if the whole world passing by him to and fro sees him like this. Because when someone finally found his way to his heart again -to make him strong again, and he loses it within a second.
“Jonghyun.” He cries.
“Kibum.” He yells.
The waiter walks to the table and looks at the coffee. It was untouched, no one has drank from it -since the man hasn’t come back.
“It’s half-empty.” He stares out the window.
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A/N: Did I make you cry? Because to be honest, I was tearing up a little bit while typing this. I was listening to Yiruma’s Passing By, and darn it. That song is so sad. ; _ ; I wonder where did I pull out this angst plot from? ; ___ ; I hope you still enjoyed it though. Comments are loved. Tissue?