Madness
Hi everyone! I hope you're enjoying the fall weather. I admit I spend most of it indoors these days, but what little time I do get outside is always extremely pleasant.
I know it's been a while, but I feel like you ought to know how my Halloween night went. I was on duty that night, and it went a little something like this:
2000: Admitted and was assigned a patient with a severe rash, later determined to be an allergic reaction to a household cleaner. What we found out before that was he's a hemophiliac! That's right, once we stuck him he just kept bleeding and bleeding. Took three doctors to keep the poor guy from bleeding to death.
2030: Admitted a patient with some really strange symptoms. Decided he was non-emergency and put him in the waiting room. I'll come back to this.
2040: A nurse drops a few bags of blood on the floor, which for some inexplicable reason explode and fill the entire hall with that unmistakeable smell for the rest of the night.
2045: Shin jokes that there must be a full moon tonight.
2100: The patient from earlier stole an elderly patient's walker, assaulted a nurse station and locked himself in a supply closet. We decide to let him stay in there while the police arrived to help us subdue him.
2105: As I walk past said supply closet, the patient opened the door and pulled me in with him!
2106: I think I passed out.
2110: I wake to find the patient's name is "Wolf Man" or so he says and he must return to the wild and he is bringing me with him.
2111: My attempts to find a weapon prove fruitless. I am now trapped in a supply closet with a crazy person. A voice in my head reprimanded me for using the term "crazy" as a medical professional. A much louder voice in my head told the first one to zip it.
2115: The police arrive and try to negotiate with the patient. Most of the staff and the police are trying to be gentle. Wolf Man says he'll make me his #1 at the pack. At this point I'll do whatever he says if he'll LET ME OUT OF THE SUPPLY CLOSET.
2130: Still in the closet. Wolf man is napping. He's broken off the inside handle.
2145: The police break down the door and Wolf Man attempts to bite me and "convert" me. Between me and the police we manage to keep him from biting me long enough to give him a nice dose of sedative.
2150: Shin and I take a coffee break on the roof. The moon is a tiny sliver that seems to be mocking me. Shin says at least it wasn't full or things would be really crazy tonight.
2200: Turns out Wolf Man had escaped from a mental institution the day before.
2300: An hour passes relatively peacefully. For a hospital anyway.
2305: A vampire, a mummy, a witch, and a Frankenstein monster are admitted after a car wreck with minor injuries.
2310: A bat got into pediatrics somehow. The children were evacuated and the interns were sent in to get it.
2315: The bat lands in my hair.
2316: I awake to a sharp pain on the back of my head and the bat trapped in a pillowcase. All of the other interns are trying to look innocent and suggesting I get a rabies shot just in case.
2325: Third floor toilets are clogged. All of them.
2330: Second floor toilets clog.
2340: Mental patient is caught stuffing entire rolls of toilet paper into the first floor bathroom toilets and promptly sent back to his room. Claimed Digimon were coming through the pipes. I called home to make sure Gomamon was still there.
Midnight: Shift ends. As I'm leaving, a produce truck carrying pumpkins crashes into the side of the building and involuntarily unloads its entire cargo in front of the emergency room.
0005: My brain checks out for the night and autopilots me home. Shin would later tell me he's seen worse. OH BOY DO I LOVE BEING A DOCTOR.
I know it's been a while, but I feel like you ought to know how my Halloween night went. I was on duty that night, and it went a little something like this:
2000: Admitted and was assigned a patient with a severe rash, later determined to be an allergic reaction to a household cleaner. What we found out before that was he's a hemophiliac! That's right, once we stuck him he just kept bleeding and bleeding. Took three doctors to keep the poor guy from bleeding to death.
2030: Admitted a patient with some really strange symptoms. Decided he was non-emergency and put him in the waiting room. I'll come back to this.
2040: A nurse drops a few bags of blood on the floor, which for some inexplicable reason explode and fill the entire hall with that unmistakeable smell for the rest of the night.
2045: Shin jokes that there must be a full moon tonight.
2100: The patient from earlier stole an elderly patient's walker, assaulted a nurse station and locked himself in a supply closet. We decide to let him stay in there while the police arrived to help us subdue him.
2105: As I walk past said supply closet, the patient opened the door and pulled me in with him!
2106: I think I passed out.
2110: I wake to find the patient's name is "Wolf Man" or so he says and he must return to the wild and he is bringing me with him.
2111: My attempts to find a weapon prove fruitless. I am now trapped in a supply closet with a crazy person. A voice in my head reprimanded me for using the term "crazy" as a medical professional. A much louder voice in my head told the first one to zip it.
2115: The police arrive and try to negotiate with the patient. Most of the staff and the police are trying to be gentle. Wolf Man says he'll make me his #1 at the pack. At this point I'll do whatever he says if he'll LET ME OUT OF THE SUPPLY CLOSET.
2130: Still in the closet. Wolf man is napping. He's broken off the inside handle.
2145: The police break down the door and Wolf Man attempts to bite me and "convert" me. Between me and the police we manage to keep him from biting me long enough to give him a nice dose of sedative.
2150: Shin and I take a coffee break on the roof. The moon is a tiny sliver that seems to be mocking me. Shin says at least it wasn't full or things would be really crazy tonight.
2200: Turns out Wolf Man had escaped from a mental institution the day before.
2300: An hour passes relatively peacefully. For a hospital anyway.
2305: A vampire, a mummy, a witch, and a Frankenstein monster are admitted after a car wreck with minor injuries.
2310: A bat got into pediatrics somehow. The children were evacuated and the interns were sent in to get it.
2315: The bat lands in my hair.
2316: I awake to a sharp pain on the back of my head and the bat trapped in a pillowcase. All of the other interns are trying to look innocent and suggesting I get a rabies shot just in case.
2325: Third floor toilets are clogged. All of them.
2330: Second floor toilets clog.
2340: Mental patient is caught stuffing entire rolls of toilet paper into the first floor bathroom toilets and promptly sent back to his room. Claimed Digimon were coming through the pipes. I called home to make sure Gomamon was still there.
Midnight: Shift ends. As I'm leaving, a produce truck carrying pumpkins crashes into the side of the building and involuntarily unloads its entire cargo in front of the emergency room.
0005: My brain checks out for the night and autopilots me home. Shin would later tell me he's seen worse. OH BOY DO I LOVE BEING A DOCTOR.