Christ, I'd sell out the nation, for I have been saddled with the murder of you ...
And as they did eat, he said, Verily I say unto you, that one of you shall betray me.
And they were exceeding sorrowful, and began every one of them to say unto him, Lord, is it I?
And he answered and said, He that dippeth his hand with me in the dish, the same shall betray me. (Matthew 26:21-23)
A heavy silence fell upon the Garden of Gethsemane then as all eyes turned upon the hand which accompanied that of Christ - the hand of Judas Iscariot, who could do nothing but hang his head in shame.
Then Judas, which betrayed him, answered and said, Master, is it I? He said unto him, Thou hast said. (Matthew: 26:25)
The other Apostles drew sharp breaths, thankful that it was not they who had been labeled the Traitor. Slowly, Judas withdrew his hand, setting it in his lap, avoiding the scathing glares of his so-called Brothers. He barely heard Christ's prophecy of Peter's denouncement, nor did he notice the others surreptitiously distancing themselves from him. Even as they went to the mount to pray after their meal, even as he followed Christ to his private dialogue with God, Judas’ mind was filled with guilt and shame, and when he could stand it no more, he stood and ran from the others, collapsing some distance away. Too exhausted by confusion and turmoil, he lay upon the cool grass, listening to his own rapid heartbeat and ragged breathing, eyes closed against the fading light. After a few minutes, he heard the soft approach of footsteps, and opened his eyes to see the tattered hem of Christ's robe. Judas turned his head away, too ashamed to look upon even the feet of the man he loved as a Brother and respected as a Teacher.
Then saith he unto them, My soul is exceeding sorrowful, even unto death: tarry ye here, and watch with me. (Matthew 26:38)
"Do you believe in perfection?" Christ asked softly, sitting carefully on the ground. When Judas did not answer, he continued, "It is a desire of man, perfection. We strive to achieve it, revere those who embody it. But nothing in this world is perfect, Judas. Only God above can attain such glory."
Judas sat up slowly, his eyes still averted, but his ears attentive.
"They call me His Son," Christ continued. "In me, they see the perfection they wish for in their lives. I am no more perfect than they; yet, when I am gone, they will remember me as such."
"We are but men," Judas murmured. "To be compared to God is a sin of arrogance."
"This is what causes you such conflict, my Brother," Christ affirmed softly. "This is why you have betrayed me."
Tears pricked Judas' eyes; his heart felt as if it would explode.
"I'll go back to Caiaphas," he cried, finally looking up. "I'll tell him it was a mistake, I'll lead them astray! I can stop this before it goes too far - "
He fell silent as Christ raised a hand.
"We are bound, Judas," he said, oddly calm for a man who knew he would be dead soon. "My fate is inescapable, as is yours. And for that, I am truly sorry. They call me criminal now; when I am gone, they will call me Lord. But what of the criminal? Do you know what shall become of him?”
Judas shook his head silently.
“He will become you, Judas. To see me as perfect, they must remove imperfection. And I am afraid that those imperfections will be passed on to you.”
“So I am to inherit your flawed, human existence?” Judas asked, standing suddenly, anger seeping into each word. “I am to be hated so that you will be elevated to His Right Hand?”
Christ simply nodded, sorrow in his eyes, pained by the awful fate that awaited them both.
“They will curse your name as they praise mine,” he finally said. “No matter what words are spoken, Judas, remember this: In their eyes, you are worthy of nothing but a legacy of treachery and scorn. But in my eyes, you are heir to my teachings, my knowledge, my wisdom.”
Judas’ anger faded at those words and was replaced by heartbreak. He fell to the ground once again and wept at the feet of his Brother and Teacher.
“Can you ever forgive me?” he asked, his voice nothing more than a choked whisper.
“I have always forgiven you,” Christ answered softly, helping Judas to his feet. “Now, sleep, my Brother. For after the dawn, neither of us shall rest again.”
With that, he walked away, leaving Judas alone once again.
And there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him.
And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly: and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground. (Luke 22:43-44)
And they were exceeding sorrowful, and began every one of them to say unto him, Lord, is it I?
And he answered and said, He that dippeth his hand with me in the dish, the same shall betray me. (Matthew 26:21-23)
A heavy silence fell upon the Garden of Gethsemane then as all eyes turned upon the hand which accompanied that of Christ - the hand of Judas Iscariot, who could do nothing but hang his head in shame.
Then Judas, which betrayed him, answered and said, Master, is it I? He said unto him, Thou hast said. (Matthew: 26:25)
The other Apostles drew sharp breaths, thankful that it was not they who had been labeled the Traitor. Slowly, Judas withdrew his hand, setting it in his lap, avoiding the scathing glares of his so-called Brothers. He barely heard Christ's prophecy of Peter's denouncement, nor did he notice the others surreptitiously distancing themselves from him. Even as they went to the mount to pray after their meal, even as he followed Christ to his private dialogue with God, Judas’ mind was filled with guilt and shame, and when he could stand it no more, he stood and ran from the others, collapsing some distance away. Too exhausted by confusion and turmoil, he lay upon the cool grass, listening to his own rapid heartbeat and ragged breathing, eyes closed against the fading light. After a few minutes, he heard the soft approach of footsteps, and opened his eyes to see the tattered hem of Christ's robe. Judas turned his head away, too ashamed to look upon even the feet of the man he loved as a Brother and respected as a Teacher.
Then saith he unto them, My soul is exceeding sorrowful, even unto death: tarry ye here, and watch with me. (Matthew 26:38)
"Do you believe in perfection?" Christ asked softly, sitting carefully on the ground. When Judas did not answer, he continued, "It is a desire of man, perfection. We strive to achieve it, revere those who embody it. But nothing in this world is perfect, Judas. Only God above can attain such glory."
Judas sat up slowly, his eyes still averted, but his ears attentive.
"They call me His Son," Christ continued. "In me, they see the perfection they wish for in their lives. I am no more perfect than they; yet, when I am gone, they will remember me as such."
"We are but men," Judas murmured. "To be compared to God is a sin of arrogance."
"This is what causes you such conflict, my Brother," Christ affirmed softly. "This is why you have betrayed me."
Tears pricked Judas' eyes; his heart felt as if it would explode.
"I'll go back to Caiaphas," he cried, finally looking up. "I'll tell him it was a mistake, I'll lead them astray! I can stop this before it goes too far - "
He fell silent as Christ raised a hand.
"We are bound, Judas," he said, oddly calm for a man who knew he would be dead soon. "My fate is inescapable, as is yours. And for that, I am truly sorry. They call me criminal now; when I am gone, they will call me Lord. But what of the criminal? Do you know what shall become of him?”
Judas shook his head silently.
“He will become you, Judas. To see me as perfect, they must remove imperfection. And I am afraid that those imperfections will be passed on to you.”
“So I am to inherit your flawed, human existence?” Judas asked, standing suddenly, anger seeping into each word. “I am to be hated so that you will be elevated to His Right Hand?”
Christ simply nodded, sorrow in his eyes, pained by the awful fate that awaited them both.
“They will curse your name as they praise mine,” he finally said. “No matter what words are spoken, Judas, remember this: In their eyes, you are worthy of nothing but a legacy of treachery and scorn. But in my eyes, you are heir to my teachings, my knowledge, my wisdom.”
Judas’ anger faded at those words and was replaced by heartbreak. He fell to the ground once again and wept at the feet of his Brother and Teacher.
“Can you ever forgive me?” he asked, his voice nothing more than a choked whisper.
“I have always forgiven you,” Christ answered softly, helping Judas to his feet. “Now, sleep, my Brother. For after the dawn, neither of us shall rest again.”
With that, he walked away, leaving Judas alone once again.
And there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him.
And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly: and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground. (Luke 22:43-44)