[exo] love, i have wounds (only you can mend)
love, i have wounds (only you can mend)
kris/baekhyun ; nc-17 ; romance, slight-angst ; 4000 words
I guess that's love, I can't pretend. Prostitution!AU
a/n: written for this prompt at exopromptmeme and also for gee xxbq because she's been feeding us all krisbaek porn so about time to return the favor tbh. but i do expect more krisbaek porn from u gee. title, summary and cut from tom odell's can't pretend because best musician and i am too sleepy to think up of one of my own.
also lots of kissing because kissing is good woah kissing. but i am ashamed because prolly bad porn and too mUCH PLOT IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE PWP
For the first time in a long while, Baekhyun wakes up warm and content -- happy even. He doesn't wake up straight away; it's a slow process of consciousness slowly trickling back to him, the inside of his eyelids slowly turning brighter and brighter until he has to rub his eyes and yawn, nuzzling further into the pillows and blankets.
To his pleasure, he finds that whatever it is that he's snuggling to seems to wound itself tighter around him, almost suffocating Baekhyun in its hold, but it's nice, it's comforting. Baekhyun thinks he hears a quiet laughter nearby but blames it on his sleep-muddled mind making up things, and goes back to sleep.
He's awoken once again, perhaps a few hours later, by the feel of something soft pressing against his temple, and a voice whispering, "Wake up, sleepy head."
That does it. Baekhyun sits up so suddenly he feels vertigo making him see double, but even in his disoriented state he knows he's not in his own room.
"Whoa, slow down," the voice chuckles, and Baekhyun realizes that it's Yifan's. Yifan. Yifan.
He had fallen asleep in Yifan's place, of all people.
He feels his cheeks warming up at the sight of the man half-lying down propped up on his elbows, already showered and hair still a little damp but neat nevertheless, and -- oh. He smells so nice. Like early morning and clean linens. Baekhyun thinks he'd quite like to spend the rest of his life waking up to that.
And then he catches himself. No, he isn't supposed to think about that. He's just a body Yifan hires, nothing more.
But the damage is done. The thought hurts more than it should, so Baekhyun hurriedly gets up and goes to fetch his jacket that's slung over a chair, relieved to find that he's already fully clothed. He remembers showering last night after they were done, coming back to the room to see Yifan already asleep, and decided he'd like to catch a few winks before going back to his own place. He really didn't mean to fall asleep until morning.
Thinking back, falling asleep to the sound of Yifan's breathing and the slow, steady beats of his heart felt like the most natural thing, like it was meant to be.
"Wait," Yifan says, and is that a hint a hint of disappointment in his voice? Baekhyun doesn't let himself dwell on the matter. He looks back, and Yifan is staring up at him, unsmiling, but not frowning either. It's an emotion Baekhyun can't quite put his finger on; he doesn't know what to make of it.
But then Yifan smiles suddenly, and the sight of it makes Baekhyun's chest seize painfully. "Kiss me," he says, and Baekhyun's shoulders sags. It's times like this that gets Baekhyun terribly confused, the way Yifan is saying things like he means them, like he actually loves Baekhyun.
What a foolish thought. He's thrown love away a long time ago, when he took up the profession. He had been hurt far too many times to still believe that love is real.
He should have said no, should have said that Yifan only paid for the night and this was just a mistake on Baekhyun's part (he should be thankful Yifan hasn't kicked him out already), but instead Baekhyun relents. He slides back down and Yifan pulls him closer so he's sitting on his lap, before cupping Baekhyun's face with a large hand and tilting it upwards so he can kiss him.
It's soft and slow, just like every one of Yifan's kisses. There is no sense of urgency; even when they're fucking rough, his kisses always stays sweet, almost reverent, to the point that it makes Baekhyun tear up a few times.
None of his clients ever treat him like this, like he's a person and not a fucktoy they can dispose once they've shot their load in him, and somehow Baekhyun's left feeling relieved, but also more terrible this way.
Yifan pulls away first, but they're still staying so close Baekhyun can feel his minty breath fanning over his face. It's another thing that sets Yifan apart from his other clients. All of them are middle-aged men, most of them married, with breaths that stank of alcohol and cigarette and shirts smelling like sweat. Baekhyun can't say he "likes" his job, but the pay is good, and it's relatively easy, but the stinking clients -- they're the only thing Baekhyun really hates.
Yifan's always been different. From the very first time Baekhyun met him, he's always been clean and fresh and nice-smelling. Even when their appointments are straight after Yifan gets home from work, he always manages to still look so put together and neat, it's a little disconcerting.
It terrifies Baekhyun that he'd like to see the other side of Yifan. To wake up before him and see him with his bed hair and rumpled sleep shirt, blinking sleepily at the ceiling.
When he looks up, Yifan is staring straight at him, a tenderness in his eyes Baekhyun never recognized before. His heart gives a pained lurch.
"I need to go," Baekhyun whispers, but he makes no move to get out of Yifan's embrace, and Yifan isn't loosening his hold on Baekhyun either.
They continue to stare into each other's eyes, before Yifan's eyes flickers down to Baekhyun's lips, and back up again. "Stay," he says, voice quiet as if he's afraid to say it. "I want you. Right now."
Baekhyun's head is screaming at him to say No, I have another client in one hour, and then another two later on, but all he does is gulp and stare dumbly into Yifan's eyes, almost pleading him to understand. The way Yifan says it makes Baekhyun almost believe that he wants him, all of him, and not just his body, and it hurts more than he cares to think because he knows it's not true.
Yifan, mistaking his hesitation for payment purposes, reaches into his bedside table and takes out his wallet, before stuffing a large wad of cash into Baekhyun's back pocket. Baekhyun's mouth turns bitter as he is once again reminded that this is just a job.
Without asking for anymore permission, Yifan places his hands under Baekhyun's shirt and slides it up his torso, eliciting a shiver from Baekhyun. And who is Baekhyun to deny him anything? Before Yifan he's weak, he is so weak, he thinks he could run to hell and back if Yifan asks him to.
Yifan's thumbs flicks over his nipples and Baekhyun bites his lip, suppressing a groan. He'd be lying if he says the slightest touch from Yifan doesn't affect him so strongly, but he's not going to confess it verbally anytime soon, if ever. His shirt comes off easily, and so do his jeans, and Yifan is pinning him to the mattress and kissing him insistently, the soft material of his sweatpants rubbing against Baekhyun's cock as he positions himself between his legs.
Yifan rakes his nails down Baekhyun's chest, putting just enough pressure to make Baekhyun keen and arch off the bed. When he takes his hands away, Baekhyun drops down, bouncing slightly on the mattress as he whines. His hands return as he deepens the kiss, rubbing gentle circles all over Baekhyun's stomach which eases his nerves a little.
It's not fair that Yifan has this much power on Baekhyun, how he can so easily make him bend and move with just the slightest touch. He should be used to all of this by now, should be numbed from all the sex he'd had. But Baekhyun can't help himself that he reaches out and lets out a pitiful whine when Yifan pulls away to sit on his heels, laughing at Baekhyun's antics.
"Ssh, just wait," Yifan says gently, and Baekhyun's arms drops to his sides dejectedly. "Let me just look at you for a moment. Wow, you look beautiful like this, all sleepy and cute."
The comment might have been thrown out carelessly on Yifan's part, but it totally catches Baekhyun off-guard. He's been called many things by lots of people, sexy, sultry, pretty, even cute, but no one's ever described him as beautiful before.
Yifan just sits there, admiring Baekhyun bathed in morning light and casually stroking Baekhyun's thighs, absolutely unaware of the turmoil raging inside Baekhyun's head. Feeling hopeful that maybe, just maybe, Yifan might like him back is the last thing that Baekhyun wants to happen, but its seed is already growing and growing fast so before he can catch himself, Baekhyun lets out a sob. He quickly muffles it with the back of his hand but it's too late, Yifan's heard it and he suddenly looks alarmed. He pulls Baekhyun's hand away from his mouth and Baekhyun sobs freely, tears rushing from the corners of his eyes and into the pillows underneath, and Yifan looks so confused and lost and it makes Baekhyun feel so so much worse.
"Baekhyun? God, I'm sorry, I don't mean to force you to stay -- if you don't want to do it then that's fine, you can leave," he rambles, but Baekhyun cries harder. "Oh god -- are you feeling unwell? Do you need anything? Should I leave you alone? Oh god, please stop crying I hate seeing you upset, I didn't mean to --"
"Yifan, it's alright, I want to," Baekhyun laughs through his tears and hiccups, and Yifan stops flailing his arms for a while. "I was just -- I don't know what came over me, I'm sorry."
Yifan's body seems to sag with relief, and he smiles exasperatedly at Baekhyun before taking him by surprise and kissing him a little harder than usual. He brushes Baekhyun's tears away and moves away from his mouth to kiss his forehead, his eyelids, his cheeks, before going back to his lips. Their bodies fit so well around each other's as they kiss, like Baekhyun's hand was made to sit on that little bend between Yifan's neck and shoulders, and that Yifan's arms wound so perfectly snug around his waist.
Baekhyun, foolishly, lets himself pretend that they're two people in love, making love on a lazy Saturday morning.
Instantly, he feels a lot better and kisses Yifan back just as hard, tangling his fingers in his hair. He knows that the hurt will catch up later, but for now, he just wants to bask in the feeling of being wanted.
He rolls them over so he's on top of Yifan instead, and trails his kisses down Yifan's neck, sucking the skin over his adam's apple softly and earning an appreciative hum before moving further south. He likes to pay special attention to the dip where Yifan's thighs joins his torso; he's ticklish there, and Baekhyun playfully licks all over that spot until Yifan is laughing and pushing his shoulders away. He moves down again, until his lips are hindered by the sweatpants, and Baekhyun glances up to find Yifan is frowning and slightly panting as he gruffly says, "Just take them off already."
Baekhyun's mouth is on Yifan's cock as soon as the sweatpants come off, licking up and down the shaft and over his balls, before suddenly taking him in his mouth. Yifan grunts softly in surprise, which quickly melts into a content sigh as he puts his hands to Baekhyun's hair and helps him ease his dick down his throat.
He sucks, hard, causing Yifan to moan, and from his peripheral vision he sees him throw his head back in pleasure. It pleasures Baekhyun in turn to see Yifan feeling good, and his own cock twitches at the sight. And then, gathering the sudden bout of courage he feels, Baekhyun tries something he's never done before: he swallows.
His throat stings as it works around the girth of Yifan's cock, and Yifan fairly shouts in surprise at the sudden pressure, hands gripping Baekhyun's hair and forcefully dragging him off. Baekhyun coughs as Yifan pulls him to his chest, the older man slightly shaking as he groans and rests his head on Baekhyun's shoulder.
"Don't do that again," Yifan says hoarsely and Baekhyun's heart sinks.
"I-I'm sorry," he flounders, now feeling embarrassed. "I just thought you'd like it, and --"
Yifan cuts him off with a laugh and then a kiss, confusing Baekhyun even more. "Don't get me wrong, it felt really good. But I almost came from that alone, and I just want to be inside you for now," he explains gently. His eyes lights up a second later as he grins and brings up a hand to stroke Baekhyun's still stinging throat. "Besides, I wouldn't want to damage this pretty throat of yours. You have the loveliest voice."
Baekhyun's heart swells, and he grins before pushing Yifan back into the mattress and kissing him thoroughly.
They kiss for what feels like ages, just exploring each other's mouths, sometimes with deep, passionate kisses, sometimes with little pecks that makes the other giggle. That is, until Baekhyun shifts his position and accidentally ruts his cock against Yifan's thighs, moaning at the friction. Yifan looks up from his position under him, an amused twinkle in his eyes, but the lust is back in the forefront of Baekhyun's mind, he can't think of anything else.
"I want to ride you," he says breathily, and Yifan doesn't say anything, just grips his hips and positions him so he's kneeling over him, legs on either sides of Yifan's torso. He then reaches for the lube on the bedside table and flings it at Baekhyun, who catches it.
He spreads some of the clear liquid into his fingers and reaches behind himself, biting his lip and not once breaking eye contact with Yifan as he inserts two fingers into himself. He's still a little loose from last night, and the fingers fit inside to the knuckle with little resistance. Scissoring himself with one hand, he leans forward slightly and places the other hand on Yifan's chest for balance. Yifan's right hands strokes over his back, gliding lower and lower until it reaches Baekhyun's entrance and he begins to carefully ease one finger in, dry. Baekhyun whines at the slight sting, but it doesn't hurt as much because of the lube already there. Seeming to find no trace of discomfort on Baekhyun's face, Yifan starts to thrust his finger in tandem with Baekhyun's own.
It's not long before Baekhyun fits a third finger, and Yifan a second. By then he's a moaning mess, deliriously thinking he can come like this, the stretch from Yifan's and his own fingers slowly but surely driving him to the edge. He gives a little shiver as he pulls his fingers out and takes Yifan's as well, body shaking subtly as Yifan holds him steady by his hips with both hands.
"Okay, that's enough," Baekhyun manages to say. He wriggles around until he's situated over Yifan's cock, just about ready to put it in.
"Mm… it makes me feel good, knowing that you feel good," Yifan confesses, tone nonchalant. Baekhyun freezes for a while. Then he sighs, deciding to ignore the meaning of those words, its implications, and the pang in his chest, focusing instead on getting Yifan's dick in him.
They both moan at the sensation, and Baekhyun keeps going until Yifan's cock is all the way inside him. Baekhyun takes a moment to catch his breath, before sliding up, and back down again. It starts off slowly at first, as it always does, with Yifan holding Baekhyun's waist and occasionally rubbing circles on his skin, but when Baekhyun starts to speed up, almost bouncing on his cock, Yifan stops him.
"What are you doing?" Baekhyun whines, needy, as Yifan lays there with a frown on his face like he's thinking hard. Baekhyun rolls his hips, groaning, but Yifan just grunts and holds him more firmly, ceasing all movement.
"I want to try something," Yifan mutters, and lifts Baekhyun off his cock, laying him down on the bed on his side. Baekhyun let's him rearrange their limbs as he likes, and in the end, Baekhyun has his head resting on Yifan's arm, Yifan laying behind him and lifting Baekhyun's leg with his other arm. He eases his cock back into Baekhyun, thrusting slowly, but deeply.
He peppers kisses all along Baekhyun's neck and shoulders as he thrusts, but when Baekhyun breathlessly asks him to go faster, he refuses.
"Why?" Baekhyun says, before he can stop himself. He knows that he's in no position to demand anything, that Yifan has paid him so he can have his way with him, and Baekhyun panics for a while because of the thought that Yifan might kick him out for it. But Yifan, ever so patiently, smiles and whispers,
"Because I want to do this slowly. Properly."
He resumes the pace, and Baekhyun finds that he quite enjoys this. He starts to moan every time Yifan thrusts in, while Yifan himself muffles his own moans against his neck. This slow simmer building up in his stomach is different from the fire burning his veins from quick, rough sex, and he feels so full of the feeling he might suffocate.
Yifan drops his leg with a grunt and wounds the arm holding it up around his waist instead, pulling Baekhyun's body down when he thrusts up. The new position causes them to be closer to each other than before, and Baekhyun can easily feel the thundering of Yifan's heart through his back. Yifan doesn't let him touch himself, but Baekhyun knows he doesn't need to. He can come like this, untouched, with Yifan thrusting deeply into him.
And he does, and it's not powerful or mind-numbing, but it's intense in the sense that it goes on and on, crashing through him in waves and he writhes and moans helplessly in Yifan's arms as he orgasms. There is a cloud of bliss misting his mind when it's finally over, and Baekhyun lays boneless until Yifan comes a few thrusts later, hot, heavy breath fanning across Baekhyun's neck.
They lie in that position for a long time, catching their breaths, until Yifan flips Baekhyun over and cuddles him to his chest. Baekhyun likes this, feeling small but safe in Yifan's hold. He should be off by now, but Baekhyun pushes away the voice in his head screaming at him to detach himself from Yifan and get back to report to his boss.
After that kind of sex he just had, he can't imagine ever sleeping with anybody else again, ever.
"That was… a whole new kind of wow," Baekhyun confesses, and Yifan's shoulders shake in silent laughter.
"In a good way, or a bad way?"
"Good way, of course," Baekhyun mock-frowns at him, and Yifan smiles before kissing his nose. The gesture makes Baekhyun blink confusedly, and he looks back down, reeling. His heart fills quickly with hope, but he crushes all of it back down.
They lie there in silence, Yifan absently drawing patterns all over Baekhyun's back and Baekhyun trying to sort out the jumble in his head. So many questions are running through his mind. Is Yifan always like this to his prostitutes? Were they all just meaningless phrases he throws out casually? Does he mean any of them or none at all?
"I wonder how much it would cost me to buy you," Yifan says suddenly, and Baekhyun freezes. He looks up slowly, not daring to believe his ears just yet.
"What did you say?" he asks hoarsely.
Yifan blushes slightly, as if he's ashamed that he was caught pondering over that thought, but says, "I said, I wonder how much it would cost me to buy you. Off from Mr. Lee, I mean."
"What for?"
"Well," Yifan says hesitantly, now looking at anywhere but Baekhyun. "Once I bought you -- if I could, that is, I know how much money you generate for him -- I was hoping I could, to put it so crudely, fuck the heart out of you. So I can take it for myself." And then his voice turns gentle, and he's looking at Baekhyun again, the same sort of tenderness from before back in his eyes. Baekhyun's mouth turns dry. "Because I want you, Baekhyun. Not just your body, and not just occasionally. I want the whole package; your heart, your beautiful soul, your flaws and imperfections -- I want to see you at your worst, and be there for you, and see you when you're most beautiful, and be there as well."
The words are sincere, Baekhyun knows. His heart feels so full it might just burst. But as Baekhyun tries to process what just happened, a silence falls upon them, and Yifan laughs awkwardly to try to alleviate some of the tension.
"I know that's cheesy and lame as far as confessions go, and that wasn't how I planned it either, but --"
Baekhyun half-laughs, half-sobs at the thought that Yifan planned to confess to him. Meaning that he's been feeling this way for a while now, and that he's been too preoccupied all this time to notice that Baekhyun feels the same. It was Baekhyun's fault for not noticing as much as it was Yifan's, but still.
"Don't," Baekhyun sighs, closing his eyes and smiling. He can practically feel Yifan's questioning gaze on him. It's been a while since Baekhyun's felt this happy, this content, and he just wants to bask in the feeling longer, so he snuggles closer to Yifan's chest. "You don't have to buy me off Mr. Lee, you know, I'll gladly quit myself. Heck, you don't even have to fuck the heart out of me, as you said it, because you already have it. For a while now, in fact."
Yifan pushes him away to an arm's length away so suddenly Baekhyun's stomach lurches. "Are you serious?" he says disbelievingly.
"I am," Baekhyun says decisively, and a lot of emotions pass through Yifan's eyes so quickly they're like a blur. "Now can we please go back to the post-sex cuddling? I'm sleepy."
Yifan's emotion finally settles on joy, and he holds Baekhyun so tight he thinks his bones might break.
"So we've had sex in the morning, at night, and on the couch." Yifan lists them off, and Baekhyun laughs, the light feeling in his chest refusing to go away. "We should do it in the kitchen next. I want to put you in one of the aprons and nothing else."
"Mm, kinky," Baekhyun teases, but then he turns somber. All his insecurities come rushing back to him, even though he tries so hard to push them away. "I'm not as beautiful as you think, you know," he continues quietly. "I have my own baggage, my own demons, that I don't want to burden you with. I'd rather go back to working for Mr. Lee, if it ever comes to that."
"Baekhyun, weren't you listening?" Yifan sighs exasperatedly, and tilts his face up so he can look at him. The smile on his lips is gentle, patient. "I said I want the whole package, no exclusions. And you'd never burden me, Baekhyun. Those insecurities are what makes you Byun Baekhyun, and I could never ask for more."
By now, Baekhyun's just too choked up to form words, so he nods, and fits his head back under Yifan's chin. Yifan kisses the top of his head, and they lie there in silence, happy and warm in each other's arms.
After a while, Yifan speaks up again. "So… kitchen sex later, yes or no?"
Baekhyun laughs loudly, freely, unable to stem his mirth. "Kitchen sex it is."
kris/baekhyun ; nc-17 ; romance, slight-angst ; 4000 words
I guess that's love, I can't pretend. Prostitution!AU
a/n: written for this prompt at exopromptmeme and also for gee xxbq because she's been feeding us all krisbaek porn so about time to return the favor tbh. but i do expect more krisbaek porn from u gee. title, summary and cut from tom odell's can't pretend because best musician and i am too sleepy to think up of one of my own.
also lots of kissing because kissing is good woah kissing. but i am ashamed because prolly bad porn and too mUCH PLOT IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE PWP
For the first time in a long while, Baekhyun wakes up warm and content -- happy even. He doesn't wake up straight away; it's a slow process of consciousness slowly trickling back to him, the inside of his eyelids slowly turning brighter and brighter until he has to rub his eyes and yawn, nuzzling further into the pillows and blankets.
To his pleasure, he finds that whatever it is that he's snuggling to seems to wound itself tighter around him, almost suffocating Baekhyun in its hold, but it's nice, it's comforting. Baekhyun thinks he hears a quiet laughter nearby but blames it on his sleep-muddled mind making up things, and goes back to sleep.
He's awoken once again, perhaps a few hours later, by the feel of something soft pressing against his temple, and a voice whispering, "Wake up, sleepy head."
That does it. Baekhyun sits up so suddenly he feels vertigo making him see double, but even in his disoriented state he knows he's not in his own room.
"Whoa, slow down," the voice chuckles, and Baekhyun realizes that it's Yifan's. Yifan. Yifan.
He had fallen asleep in Yifan's place, of all people.
He feels his cheeks warming up at the sight of the man half-lying down propped up on his elbows, already showered and hair still a little damp but neat nevertheless, and -- oh. He smells so nice. Like early morning and clean linens. Baekhyun thinks he'd quite like to spend the rest of his life waking up to that.
And then he catches himself. No, he isn't supposed to think about that. He's just a body Yifan hires, nothing more.
But the damage is done. The thought hurts more than it should, so Baekhyun hurriedly gets up and goes to fetch his jacket that's slung over a chair, relieved to find that he's already fully clothed. He remembers showering last night after they were done, coming back to the room to see Yifan already asleep, and decided he'd like to catch a few winks before going back to his own place. He really didn't mean to fall asleep until morning.
Thinking back, falling asleep to the sound of Yifan's breathing and the slow, steady beats of his heart felt like the most natural thing, like it was meant to be.
"Wait," Yifan says, and is that a hint a hint of disappointment in his voice? Baekhyun doesn't let himself dwell on the matter. He looks back, and Yifan is staring up at him, unsmiling, but not frowning either. It's an emotion Baekhyun can't quite put his finger on; he doesn't know what to make of it.
But then Yifan smiles suddenly, and the sight of it makes Baekhyun's chest seize painfully. "Kiss me," he says, and Baekhyun's shoulders sags. It's times like this that gets Baekhyun terribly confused, the way Yifan is saying things like he means them, like he actually loves Baekhyun.
What a foolish thought. He's thrown love away a long time ago, when he took up the profession. He had been hurt far too many times to still believe that love is real.
He should have said no, should have said that Yifan only paid for the night and this was just a mistake on Baekhyun's part (he should be thankful Yifan hasn't kicked him out already), but instead Baekhyun relents. He slides back down and Yifan pulls him closer so he's sitting on his lap, before cupping Baekhyun's face with a large hand and tilting it upwards so he can kiss him.
It's soft and slow, just like every one of Yifan's kisses. There is no sense of urgency; even when they're fucking rough, his kisses always stays sweet, almost reverent, to the point that it makes Baekhyun tear up a few times.
None of his clients ever treat him like this, like he's a person and not a fucktoy they can dispose once they've shot their load in him, and somehow Baekhyun's left feeling relieved, but also more terrible this way.
Yifan pulls away first, but they're still staying so close Baekhyun can feel his minty breath fanning over his face. It's another thing that sets Yifan apart from his other clients. All of them are middle-aged men, most of them married, with breaths that stank of alcohol and cigarette and shirts smelling like sweat. Baekhyun can't say he "likes" his job, but the pay is good, and it's relatively easy, but the stinking clients -- they're the only thing Baekhyun really hates.
Yifan's always been different. From the very first time Baekhyun met him, he's always been clean and fresh and nice-smelling. Even when their appointments are straight after Yifan gets home from work, he always manages to still look so put together and neat, it's a little disconcerting.
It terrifies Baekhyun that he'd like to see the other side of Yifan. To wake up before him and see him with his bed hair and rumpled sleep shirt, blinking sleepily at the ceiling.
When he looks up, Yifan is staring straight at him, a tenderness in his eyes Baekhyun never recognized before. His heart gives a pained lurch.
"I need to go," Baekhyun whispers, but he makes no move to get out of Yifan's embrace, and Yifan isn't loosening his hold on Baekhyun either.
They continue to stare into each other's eyes, before Yifan's eyes flickers down to Baekhyun's lips, and back up again. "Stay," he says, voice quiet as if he's afraid to say it. "I want you. Right now."
Baekhyun's head is screaming at him to say No, I have another client in one hour, and then another two later on, but all he does is gulp and stare dumbly into Yifan's eyes, almost pleading him to understand. The way Yifan says it makes Baekhyun almost believe that he wants him, all of him, and not just his body, and it hurts more than he cares to think because he knows it's not true.
Yifan, mistaking his hesitation for payment purposes, reaches into his bedside table and takes out his wallet, before stuffing a large wad of cash into Baekhyun's back pocket. Baekhyun's mouth turns bitter as he is once again reminded that this is just a job.
Without asking for anymore permission, Yifan places his hands under Baekhyun's shirt and slides it up his torso, eliciting a shiver from Baekhyun. And who is Baekhyun to deny him anything? Before Yifan he's weak, he is so weak, he thinks he could run to hell and back if Yifan asks him to.
Yifan's thumbs flicks over his nipples and Baekhyun bites his lip, suppressing a groan. He'd be lying if he says the slightest touch from Yifan doesn't affect him so strongly, but he's not going to confess it verbally anytime soon, if ever. His shirt comes off easily, and so do his jeans, and Yifan is pinning him to the mattress and kissing him insistently, the soft material of his sweatpants rubbing against Baekhyun's cock as he positions himself between his legs.
Yifan rakes his nails down Baekhyun's chest, putting just enough pressure to make Baekhyun keen and arch off the bed. When he takes his hands away, Baekhyun drops down, bouncing slightly on the mattress as he whines. His hands return as he deepens the kiss, rubbing gentle circles all over Baekhyun's stomach which eases his nerves a little.
It's not fair that Yifan has this much power on Baekhyun, how he can so easily make him bend and move with just the slightest touch. He should be used to all of this by now, should be numbed from all the sex he'd had. But Baekhyun can't help himself that he reaches out and lets out a pitiful whine when Yifan pulls away to sit on his heels, laughing at Baekhyun's antics.
"Ssh, just wait," Yifan says gently, and Baekhyun's arms drops to his sides dejectedly. "Let me just look at you for a moment. Wow, you look beautiful like this, all sleepy and cute."
The comment might have been thrown out carelessly on Yifan's part, but it totally catches Baekhyun off-guard. He's been called many things by lots of people, sexy, sultry, pretty, even cute, but no one's ever described him as beautiful before.
Yifan just sits there, admiring Baekhyun bathed in morning light and casually stroking Baekhyun's thighs, absolutely unaware of the turmoil raging inside Baekhyun's head. Feeling hopeful that maybe, just maybe, Yifan might like him back is the last thing that Baekhyun wants to happen, but its seed is already growing and growing fast so before he can catch himself, Baekhyun lets out a sob. He quickly muffles it with the back of his hand but it's too late, Yifan's heard it and he suddenly looks alarmed. He pulls Baekhyun's hand away from his mouth and Baekhyun sobs freely, tears rushing from the corners of his eyes and into the pillows underneath, and Yifan looks so confused and lost and it makes Baekhyun feel so so much worse.
"Baekhyun? God, I'm sorry, I don't mean to force you to stay -- if you don't want to do it then that's fine, you can leave," he rambles, but Baekhyun cries harder. "Oh god -- are you feeling unwell? Do you need anything? Should I leave you alone? Oh god, please stop crying I hate seeing you upset, I didn't mean to --"
"Yifan, it's alright, I want to," Baekhyun laughs through his tears and hiccups, and Yifan stops flailing his arms for a while. "I was just -- I don't know what came over me, I'm sorry."
Yifan's body seems to sag with relief, and he smiles exasperatedly at Baekhyun before taking him by surprise and kissing him a little harder than usual. He brushes Baekhyun's tears away and moves away from his mouth to kiss his forehead, his eyelids, his cheeks, before going back to his lips. Their bodies fit so well around each other's as they kiss, like Baekhyun's hand was made to sit on that little bend between Yifan's neck and shoulders, and that Yifan's arms wound so perfectly snug around his waist.
Baekhyun, foolishly, lets himself pretend that they're two people in love, making love on a lazy Saturday morning.
Instantly, he feels a lot better and kisses Yifan back just as hard, tangling his fingers in his hair. He knows that the hurt will catch up later, but for now, he just wants to bask in the feeling of being wanted.
He rolls them over so he's on top of Yifan instead, and trails his kisses down Yifan's neck, sucking the skin over his adam's apple softly and earning an appreciative hum before moving further south. He likes to pay special attention to the dip where Yifan's thighs joins his torso; he's ticklish there, and Baekhyun playfully licks all over that spot until Yifan is laughing and pushing his shoulders away. He moves down again, until his lips are hindered by the sweatpants, and Baekhyun glances up to find Yifan is frowning and slightly panting as he gruffly says, "Just take them off already."
Baekhyun's mouth is on Yifan's cock as soon as the sweatpants come off, licking up and down the shaft and over his balls, before suddenly taking him in his mouth. Yifan grunts softly in surprise, which quickly melts into a content sigh as he puts his hands to Baekhyun's hair and helps him ease his dick down his throat.
He sucks, hard, causing Yifan to moan, and from his peripheral vision he sees him throw his head back in pleasure. It pleasures Baekhyun in turn to see Yifan feeling good, and his own cock twitches at the sight. And then, gathering the sudden bout of courage he feels, Baekhyun tries something he's never done before: he swallows.
His throat stings as it works around the girth of Yifan's cock, and Yifan fairly shouts in surprise at the sudden pressure, hands gripping Baekhyun's hair and forcefully dragging him off. Baekhyun coughs as Yifan pulls him to his chest, the older man slightly shaking as he groans and rests his head on Baekhyun's shoulder.
"Don't do that again," Yifan says hoarsely and Baekhyun's heart sinks.
"I-I'm sorry," he flounders, now feeling embarrassed. "I just thought you'd like it, and --"
Yifan cuts him off with a laugh and then a kiss, confusing Baekhyun even more. "Don't get me wrong, it felt really good. But I almost came from that alone, and I just want to be inside you for now," he explains gently. His eyes lights up a second later as he grins and brings up a hand to stroke Baekhyun's still stinging throat. "Besides, I wouldn't want to damage this pretty throat of yours. You have the loveliest voice."
Baekhyun's heart swells, and he grins before pushing Yifan back into the mattress and kissing him thoroughly.
They kiss for what feels like ages, just exploring each other's mouths, sometimes with deep, passionate kisses, sometimes with little pecks that makes the other giggle. That is, until Baekhyun shifts his position and accidentally ruts his cock against Yifan's thighs, moaning at the friction. Yifan looks up from his position under him, an amused twinkle in his eyes, but the lust is back in the forefront of Baekhyun's mind, he can't think of anything else.
"I want to ride you," he says breathily, and Yifan doesn't say anything, just grips his hips and positions him so he's kneeling over him, legs on either sides of Yifan's torso. He then reaches for the lube on the bedside table and flings it at Baekhyun, who catches it.
He spreads some of the clear liquid into his fingers and reaches behind himself, biting his lip and not once breaking eye contact with Yifan as he inserts two fingers into himself. He's still a little loose from last night, and the fingers fit inside to the knuckle with little resistance. Scissoring himself with one hand, he leans forward slightly and places the other hand on Yifan's chest for balance. Yifan's right hands strokes over his back, gliding lower and lower until it reaches Baekhyun's entrance and he begins to carefully ease one finger in, dry. Baekhyun whines at the slight sting, but it doesn't hurt as much because of the lube already there. Seeming to find no trace of discomfort on Baekhyun's face, Yifan starts to thrust his finger in tandem with Baekhyun's own.
It's not long before Baekhyun fits a third finger, and Yifan a second. By then he's a moaning mess, deliriously thinking he can come like this, the stretch from Yifan's and his own fingers slowly but surely driving him to the edge. He gives a little shiver as he pulls his fingers out and takes Yifan's as well, body shaking subtly as Yifan holds him steady by his hips with both hands.
"Okay, that's enough," Baekhyun manages to say. He wriggles around until he's situated over Yifan's cock, just about ready to put it in.
"Mm… it makes me feel good, knowing that you feel good," Yifan confesses, tone nonchalant. Baekhyun freezes for a while. Then he sighs, deciding to ignore the meaning of those words, its implications, and the pang in his chest, focusing instead on getting Yifan's dick in him.
They both moan at the sensation, and Baekhyun keeps going until Yifan's cock is all the way inside him. Baekhyun takes a moment to catch his breath, before sliding up, and back down again. It starts off slowly at first, as it always does, with Yifan holding Baekhyun's waist and occasionally rubbing circles on his skin, but when Baekhyun starts to speed up, almost bouncing on his cock, Yifan stops him.
"What are you doing?" Baekhyun whines, needy, as Yifan lays there with a frown on his face like he's thinking hard. Baekhyun rolls his hips, groaning, but Yifan just grunts and holds him more firmly, ceasing all movement.
"I want to try something," Yifan mutters, and lifts Baekhyun off his cock, laying him down on the bed on his side. Baekhyun let's him rearrange their limbs as he likes, and in the end, Baekhyun has his head resting on Yifan's arm, Yifan laying behind him and lifting Baekhyun's leg with his other arm. He eases his cock back into Baekhyun, thrusting slowly, but deeply.
He peppers kisses all along Baekhyun's neck and shoulders as he thrusts, but when Baekhyun breathlessly asks him to go faster, he refuses.
"Why?" Baekhyun says, before he can stop himself. He knows that he's in no position to demand anything, that Yifan has paid him so he can have his way with him, and Baekhyun panics for a while because of the thought that Yifan might kick him out for it. But Yifan, ever so patiently, smiles and whispers,
"Because I want to do this slowly. Properly."
He resumes the pace, and Baekhyun finds that he quite enjoys this. He starts to moan every time Yifan thrusts in, while Yifan himself muffles his own moans against his neck. This slow simmer building up in his stomach is different from the fire burning his veins from quick, rough sex, and he feels so full of the feeling he might suffocate.
Yifan drops his leg with a grunt and wounds the arm holding it up around his waist instead, pulling Baekhyun's body down when he thrusts up. The new position causes them to be closer to each other than before, and Baekhyun can easily feel the thundering of Yifan's heart through his back. Yifan doesn't let him touch himself, but Baekhyun knows he doesn't need to. He can come like this, untouched, with Yifan thrusting deeply into him.
And he does, and it's not powerful or mind-numbing, but it's intense in the sense that it goes on and on, crashing through him in waves and he writhes and moans helplessly in Yifan's arms as he orgasms. There is a cloud of bliss misting his mind when it's finally over, and Baekhyun lays boneless until Yifan comes a few thrusts later, hot, heavy breath fanning across Baekhyun's neck.
They lie in that position for a long time, catching their breaths, until Yifan flips Baekhyun over and cuddles him to his chest. Baekhyun likes this, feeling small but safe in Yifan's hold. He should be off by now, but Baekhyun pushes away the voice in his head screaming at him to detach himself from Yifan and get back to report to his boss.
After that kind of sex he just had, he can't imagine ever sleeping with anybody else again, ever.
"That was… a whole new kind of wow," Baekhyun confesses, and Yifan's shoulders shake in silent laughter.
"In a good way, or a bad way?"
"Good way, of course," Baekhyun mock-frowns at him, and Yifan smiles before kissing his nose. The gesture makes Baekhyun blink confusedly, and he looks back down, reeling. His heart fills quickly with hope, but he crushes all of it back down.
They lie there in silence, Yifan absently drawing patterns all over Baekhyun's back and Baekhyun trying to sort out the jumble in his head. So many questions are running through his mind. Is Yifan always like this to his prostitutes? Were they all just meaningless phrases he throws out casually? Does he mean any of them or none at all?
"I wonder how much it would cost me to buy you," Yifan says suddenly, and Baekhyun freezes. He looks up slowly, not daring to believe his ears just yet.
"What did you say?" he asks hoarsely.
Yifan blushes slightly, as if he's ashamed that he was caught pondering over that thought, but says, "I said, I wonder how much it would cost me to buy you. Off from Mr. Lee, I mean."
"What for?"
"Well," Yifan says hesitantly, now looking at anywhere but Baekhyun. "Once I bought you -- if I could, that is, I know how much money you generate for him -- I was hoping I could, to put it so crudely, fuck the heart out of you. So I can take it for myself." And then his voice turns gentle, and he's looking at Baekhyun again, the same sort of tenderness from before back in his eyes. Baekhyun's mouth turns dry. "Because I want you, Baekhyun. Not just your body, and not just occasionally. I want the whole package; your heart, your beautiful soul, your flaws and imperfections -- I want to see you at your worst, and be there for you, and see you when you're most beautiful, and be there as well."
The words are sincere, Baekhyun knows. His heart feels so full it might just burst. But as Baekhyun tries to process what just happened, a silence falls upon them, and Yifan laughs awkwardly to try to alleviate some of the tension.
"I know that's cheesy and lame as far as confessions go, and that wasn't how I planned it either, but --"
Baekhyun half-laughs, half-sobs at the thought that Yifan planned to confess to him. Meaning that he's been feeling this way for a while now, and that he's been too preoccupied all this time to notice that Baekhyun feels the same. It was Baekhyun's fault for not noticing as much as it was Yifan's, but still.
"Don't," Baekhyun sighs, closing his eyes and smiling. He can practically feel Yifan's questioning gaze on him. It's been a while since Baekhyun's felt this happy, this content, and he just wants to bask in the feeling longer, so he snuggles closer to Yifan's chest. "You don't have to buy me off Mr. Lee, you know, I'll gladly quit myself. Heck, you don't even have to fuck the heart out of me, as you said it, because you already have it. For a while now, in fact."
Yifan pushes him away to an arm's length away so suddenly Baekhyun's stomach lurches. "Are you serious?" he says disbelievingly.
"I am," Baekhyun says decisively, and a lot of emotions pass through Yifan's eyes so quickly they're like a blur. "Now can we please go back to the post-sex cuddling? I'm sleepy."
Yifan's emotion finally settles on joy, and he holds Baekhyun so tight he thinks his bones might break.
"So we've had sex in the morning, at night, and on the couch." Yifan lists them off, and Baekhyun laughs, the light feeling in his chest refusing to go away. "We should do it in the kitchen next. I want to put you in one of the aprons and nothing else."
"Mm, kinky," Baekhyun teases, but then he turns somber. All his insecurities come rushing back to him, even though he tries so hard to push them away. "I'm not as beautiful as you think, you know," he continues quietly. "I have my own baggage, my own demons, that I don't want to burden you with. I'd rather go back to working for Mr. Lee, if it ever comes to that."
"Baekhyun, weren't you listening?" Yifan sighs exasperatedly, and tilts his face up so he can look at him. The smile on his lips is gentle, patient. "I said I want the whole package, no exclusions. And you'd never burden me, Baekhyun. Those insecurities are what makes you Byun Baekhyun, and I could never ask for more."
By now, Baekhyun's just too choked up to form words, so he nods, and fits his head back under Yifan's chin. Yifan kisses the top of his head, and they lie there in silence, happy and warm in each other's arms.
After a while, Yifan speaks up again. "So… kitchen sex later, yes or no?"
Baekhyun laughs loudly, freely, unable to stem his mirth. "Kitchen sex it is."