(no subject)
MENSA DEFINITIONs
> The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to
> take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or
> changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are the 2005
> winners:
>
> 1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until
> you realize it was your money to start with.
>
> 2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
>
> 3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops
> bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows
> little sign of breaking down in the near future.
>
> 4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of
> getting laid.
>
> 5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the
> subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
>
> 6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
>
> 7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the
> person who doesn't get it.
>
> 8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
>
> 9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
>
> 10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.
>
> 11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these
> really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's
> like, a serious bummer.
>
> 12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day
> consuming
> only things that are good for you.
>
> 13. Glibido: All talk and no action.
>
> 14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when
> they come at you rapidly.
>
> 15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after
> you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
>
> 16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into
> your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
>
> 17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in
> the fruit you're eating.
>
> 18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.