Eurovision Part II
Yeah, still sick. Blech. At least I can keep down water now, and I made myself some plain udon today, so maybe that'll stay put as well. I lost over 4lbs yesterday alone, and even if it's just water weight that's pretty damn scary, so hopefully I can get something into my system today.
Anyway!
Time for the second semi-finals line-up!
Bosnia and Herzengovina: "Love in Rewind," Dino Martin
See, THIS is what Portugal's entry should have been like. Clearly based around local folk melodies and traditions, but with fitting arrangements, harmonies, and ACTUAL IN-TUNE SINGING. This song falls into the kind of boring territory for me, but to be honest, I like it more than most of the other ballads this year. The harmonies and the little pre-chorus are pretty nice and add an element of interest to the song. Alas, there's not really any climax...I put it alongside that lovely ukulele song; nice, enjoyable, but probably not going to go very far.
Austria: "The Secret Is Love," Nadine Beiler
Can I be really superficial for a second and say I LOVE THIS GIRL'S LOOK? Yeah. I do. Unfortunately, her voice, while pretty, is rather generic. Kind of like listening to all of the R&B stars that glutted the US music market in the 1990s...strong, with good points, but we've heard it a million times before and Whitney Houston she ain't. And the song is another really forgettable one.
The Netherlands: "Never Alone," 3JS
So...remember how much I HATED last year's entry? And how my friends in the Netherlands all basically said, "No, we never have good entries in Eurovision. Everyone here hates our entries, every time"? Yeah. They've got a reason to be proud this year! I really liked this one a lot ^_^. I'd put it in my top ten this-had-better-be-a-top-placer list. The vocals are lovely, the arrangement is fitting, the song itself might be about an overdone topic but it's presented in a way that makes it more interesting and the lyrics aren't half-bad....and that last one is a HUGE compliment, because this was one of the translated ones that got voted into the competition in Dutch but will be performing in English.
Basically, Eurovision could do a LOT worse than having a decent boy-band-with-guitars group. This one should make the finals, for sure. And I hope it does well.
Belgium: "With Love," Witloof Bay
FUCK YEAH A CAPELLA GROUP FOR THE WIN!!!!!
I. LOVE. This. Song. So damn much. The vocals are, obviously, spot-on, the use of the different singers as the leads in various parts of the song is quite effective, the group does a great job of having the interest of a full band arrangement behind them which is what every good a capella group should do...oh, and did I mention that the VOCAL PERCUSSIONIST IS FUCKING AMAZING? Add in the fact that song is quite a nice little jazzy romance number with cool rhythms and that CHLLING modulation at the end...yeah, these are the guys I want to win. If they don't make it into the top five I will be SO DAMN DISAPPOINTED. But I think if they come up with an interesting stage performance to go with the song, they've got a good shot.
Slovakia: "I'm Still Alive," TWiiNS
This sounds like it should be an anime closing. In a bad way. This is one of the most generic pop ballads I've ever heard. Ever. Even compared to the other bland songs in this competition this year. Just...no. No no no. This is the sort of song that 12 year old girls sing along with while fantasizing about Justin Bieber or something. It's the sort of song stereotypical weeabos use to make AMVs about their favorite couple on Windows Movie Maker. I just...no. This isn't the worst song in the competition, not by a long shot (*PORTUGAL, THERE AREN'T ENOUGH FORMS OF TORTURE IN THE WORLD*) but I REALLY REALLY REALLY hate it. I could care less how it does as long as it doesn't place highly overall. I just want it to GO AWAY.
Ukraine: "Angel," Mika Newton
...what is with all of the generic pretty white girls singing generic pretty white girl ballads this year? Seriously. Only 18 of them aren't going to make the finals cut, and I hope every single one of them ends up on the list. THIS IS GETTING SO DAMN BORING. WHAT THE HELL.
Moldova: "So Lucky," Zdob și Zdub
...oh thank god, something other than solo girls in pretty dresses singing boring love songs. This is HILARIOUS. Thank you, Moldova. I was starting to wonder if I'd entered an infinite time loop of dull music. I have no idea if this is actually a good song or not. I suspect not, but right now (and during the competition, too), I think it's just so nice to hear something DIFFERENT that it sounds brilliant.
Albeit really, really silly. (This sounds like an anime opening. The good kind. The kind that makes you go, "Thank god for awkward frat boy rap.") Also: oboe? In this style of song? Really? I just died laughing with joy.
Sweden: "Popular," Eric Saade
Someone please tell me I wasn't the only one thinking, "Ooo, have they changed the rules to allow covers? A Swedish version of Wicked would ROCK!"
Ahem. So...disappointment aside...could this guy have a more annoyingly nasal voice? Seriously? And the lyrics and subject matter? This guy makes Katy Perry look altruistic and unselfish! And I do NOT say that lightly. These are easily the most self-absorbed, annoying, selfish, misogynist lyrics I have ever, EVER heard. Which is too bad, because the melody, arrangement, and performance are all decent. This had the potential to be a cool little club piece; it's catchy, it's cool to listen to...but the vocals SUCK and the lyrics ARE FUCKING TERRIBLE.
If this makes it past the lowest spots in the finals (hell, if it makes it to the finals AT ALL), I'll be incredibly annoyed. I hate this song more than Portugal's, and in terms of objective "goodness," it's only a few short steps up from that one, too. BOO BOO BOO MAKE IT DIE.
Cyprus: "San Aggelos S’Agapisa," Christos Mylordos
Awww, I miss "Life Looks Better In Spring." But this isn't too bad. I LOVE the arrangements and use of traditional motives in the violin part. And for some reason, something about the melody and harmonies makes me think of a Spanish ballad. It's not boring, it's pretty...my only complaint is that little "my lady of soundtrack sorrow" bit about 2/3's through, when the drums and electric guitar suddenly kick in and there's that random generic-ethnic-woodle singing that happens. I like the way it all came together at the end, but the change was just kind of abrupt and didn't seem to fit initial. It was jarring. But not too bad otherwise. It won't make the finals, though. Too mellow.
Bulgaria: "Na Inat," Poli Genova
(The song starts a little over 2 minutes in)
Now this is a nice twist on the types of songs permeating the competition this year...not to mention a LOT less hilariously bad than last year's! Girl rock singers always make me happy, and it's nice that this girl has her own look (compared to the band, I mean), but can really sing and make the songs work. I'm getting some Within Temptation vibes here, in a good way. This is another one of my faves, right behind Serbia and Belgium, and just before Turkey. If the judges and voters can get past the language, I could see this going pretty damn far.
Macedonia: "Rusinka," Vlatko Ilievski
Okay, the opening riff? AWESOME. I wanted to hop up and dance the second I heard it. And the instrumentation in general? Way cool. But the song itself is too slow for me, and I'm not a big fan of the singer's voice. It's good but I'm not a fan of that kind of growly singing, personally. I just feel let down.
Israel: "Ding Dong," Dana International
O HAI DANA INTERNATIONAL. Fancy seeing you here again! ...oooo, but you don't sound nearly as nice on ballads as you do on more upbeat songs. Too nasal, hon. But still, a solid dance piece. Not going to get you another win, but how often does that happen, anyway?
Slovenia: "No One," Maja Keuc
I'm leery of making any comments on this one...because it's being translated into English for the show. But there aren't available recordings of it in English yet. She does have a nice voice (a bit more distinctive than some of the other R&B warblers, albeit very similar), her pitch is nice, the performance is good, the outfit is killer and I WANT IT, and there's something about the song (maybe the electric guitars, or the violins) that makes it stand out a little bit from the other "edgy" pop songs that are so overwhelming in the first semi-final. As it stands right now, I like it and definitely see it making the finals, but...once it's translated, will it lose something?
A preview:
Her voice is still lovely and her pronunciation is good...if the rest of the song is transliterated this well, it could be good. But if they go for a more literal translation or dumb down the lyrics for the sake of the melody...nah.
Romania: "Change," Hotel FM
This is another one that I really, really like. Overall, minus the Disney princess girls, the second semi-final seems to have more variety and overall stronger contenders so far...too bad it's 10 from each round that go to the finals, not just the 20 best overall. Anyway, onto the song; I like this a lot. The chorus is a bit of a letdown after the verses, but it's still nice (just not as exciting as I personally would like), and even the singer's silly, silly performance and outfit can't really detract from how fun this song is to listen to. Finals material, but Eurovision might find it too bland to put it in the top 10, which I would if it were up to me. (Granted, it'd be 9 or 10, but that's because there are five other REALLY strong contenders and a few others that I think will have more staying power than this one. But it'd still be on the list because OMG NICE FALSETTO THERE DUDE)
Estonia: "Rockefeller Street," Getter Jaani
Awwww, how cute! She's like Lena part 2, with a funky not-quite-ballad! Albeit with terrible eye makeup. But since when does Eurovision care about makeup? ...don't answer that. Anyway, yeah. Like it. Not one of the best, but one of the ones I like the most. It's different, it's cute, it's funky, it's fitting for the singer, the lyrics are really clever, the bridge makes me giggle...I could see this pulling a "Satellite"-style upset, but more likely it'll just place somewhere in the middle. After all, if they wanted Leno 2.0...well, they have Lena herself!
Belarus: "I Love Belarus," Anastasiya Vinnikova
Now, this song has some awesome arranging happening. But I HATE the singer's voice...it just sounds too dark and shaky, like a semi-trained classical singer trying to do pop badly. It doesn't help that the song itself is really, REALLY stupid. The instrumentals might be enough for people to vote it into the finals due to how catchy and danceable it is, but...I hope not.
Latvia: "Angel in Disguise," Musiqq
More of those growly vocals I'm not too big on. But not too bad, overall. I liked it better before the synthesized boop-boop thing came in on the chorus, but still, not bad. Just not great. Good, though.
Denmark: "New Tomorrow," A Friend in London
Wow, this is very Beatles-esque, somehow. The singer is clearly nervous (that's not vibrato, that's nerves...so hopefully he'll sound less like a goat during the main show?), but otherwise the song is pretty sweet and simple and nice. Sadly, it probably won't make the finals. It's just not exciting or memorable enough for anyone to vote for it.
...also, OMG THAT HAIR IS HILARIOUS BWAHAHAHAHAHA-
Ireland: "Lipstick," Jedward
...
...
...oh god. No. No no no no no no...
I TAKE IT BACK. I TAKE IT ALL BACK. All the complaints about the "dark, edgy" pop songs, the Disney princess boring white girl ballads, the offensive jerkwad song, the hair in Denmark, Portugal....okay, I don't take back Portugal, that song was still TERRIBLE. But everything else? I TAKE IT BACK. OH GOD I THOUGHT THEY WERE GONE. Then I thought, maybe they got better in the interim? BUT THEY DIDN'T. IRELAND WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING.
IF JEDWARD MAKES IT TO THE EUROVISION FINALS I WILL CRY FOR HUMANITY. And yet, I bet they will. They'll probably come in last, but what do you want to bet enough squealing, brain-damaged fangirls call in that they still make it that far?
MAKE IT DIE MAKE IT DIE MAKE IT DIE!!!!!!
...so. Um. Yeah. I apologize for that last bit. Not my rant, just the fact that the song and performance exists. I'm so, so sorry for that.
Next up (probably within the next 20 minutes, actually): The Big Five! Yes, FIVE. THANK YOU ITALY FOR COMING BACK WITH A BANG!
Anyway!
Time for the second semi-finals line-up!
Bosnia and Herzengovina: "Love in Rewind," Dino Martin
Click to viewSee, THIS is what Portugal's entry should have been like. Clearly based around local folk melodies and traditions, but with fitting arrangements, harmonies, and ACTUAL IN-TUNE SINGING. This song falls into the kind of boring territory for me, but to be honest, I like it more than most of the other ballads this year. The harmonies and the little pre-chorus are pretty nice and add an element of interest to the song. Alas, there's not really any climax...I put it alongside that lovely ukulele song; nice, enjoyable, but probably not going to go very far.
Austria: "The Secret Is Love," Nadine Beiler
Can I be really superficial for a second and say I LOVE THIS GIRL'S LOOK? Yeah. I do. Unfortunately, her voice, while pretty, is rather generic. Kind of like listening to all of the R&B stars that glutted the US music market in the 1990s...strong, with good points, but we've heard it a million times before and Whitney Houston she ain't. And the song is another really forgettable one.
The Netherlands: "Never Alone," 3JS
So...remember how much I HATED last year's entry? And how my friends in the Netherlands all basically said, "No, we never have good entries in Eurovision. Everyone here hates our entries, every time"? Yeah. They've got a reason to be proud this year! I really liked this one a lot ^_^. I'd put it in my top ten this-had-better-be-a-top-placer list. The vocals are lovely, the arrangement is fitting, the song itself might be about an overdone topic but it's presented in a way that makes it more interesting and the lyrics aren't half-bad....and that last one is a HUGE compliment, because this was one of the translated ones that got voted into the competition in Dutch but will be performing in English.
Basically, Eurovision could do a LOT worse than having a decent boy-band-with-guitars group. This one should make the finals, for sure. And I hope it does well.
Belgium: "With Love," Witloof Bay
FUCK YEAH A CAPELLA GROUP FOR THE WIN!!!!!
I. LOVE. This. Song. So damn much. The vocals are, obviously, spot-on, the use of the different singers as the leads in various parts of the song is quite effective, the group does a great job of having the interest of a full band arrangement behind them which is what every good a capella group should do...oh, and did I mention that the VOCAL PERCUSSIONIST IS FUCKING AMAZING? Add in the fact that song is quite a nice little jazzy romance number with cool rhythms and that CHLLING modulation at the end...yeah, these are the guys I want to win. If they don't make it into the top five I will be SO DAMN DISAPPOINTED. But I think if they come up with an interesting stage performance to go with the song, they've got a good shot.
Slovakia: "I'm Still Alive," TWiiNS
This sounds like it should be an anime closing. In a bad way. This is one of the most generic pop ballads I've ever heard. Ever. Even compared to the other bland songs in this competition this year. Just...no. No no no. This is the sort of song that 12 year old girls sing along with while fantasizing about Justin Bieber or something. It's the sort of song stereotypical weeabos use to make AMVs about their favorite couple on Windows Movie Maker. I just...no. This isn't the worst song in the competition, not by a long shot (*PORTUGAL, THERE AREN'T ENOUGH FORMS OF TORTURE IN THE WORLD*) but I REALLY REALLY REALLY hate it. I could care less how it does as long as it doesn't place highly overall. I just want it to GO AWAY.
Ukraine: "Angel," Mika Newton
...what is with all of the generic pretty white girls singing generic pretty white girl ballads this year? Seriously. Only 18 of them aren't going to make the finals cut, and I hope every single one of them ends up on the list. THIS IS GETTING SO DAMN BORING. WHAT THE HELL.
Moldova: "So Lucky," Zdob și Zdub
...oh thank god, something other than solo girls in pretty dresses singing boring love songs. This is HILARIOUS. Thank you, Moldova. I was starting to wonder if I'd entered an infinite time loop of dull music. I have no idea if this is actually a good song or not. I suspect not, but right now (and during the competition, too), I think it's just so nice to hear something DIFFERENT that it sounds brilliant.
Albeit really, really silly. (This sounds like an anime opening. The good kind. The kind that makes you go, "Thank god for awkward frat boy rap.") Also: oboe? In this style of song? Really? I just died laughing with joy.
Sweden: "Popular," Eric Saade
Someone please tell me I wasn't the only one thinking, "Ooo, have they changed the rules to allow covers? A Swedish version of Wicked would ROCK!"
Ahem. So...disappointment aside...could this guy have a more annoyingly nasal voice? Seriously? And the lyrics and subject matter? This guy makes Katy Perry look altruistic and unselfish! And I do NOT say that lightly. These are easily the most self-absorbed, annoying, selfish, misogynist lyrics I have ever, EVER heard. Which is too bad, because the melody, arrangement, and performance are all decent. This had the potential to be a cool little club piece; it's catchy, it's cool to listen to...but the vocals SUCK and the lyrics ARE FUCKING TERRIBLE.
If this makes it past the lowest spots in the finals (hell, if it makes it to the finals AT ALL), I'll be incredibly annoyed. I hate this song more than Portugal's, and in terms of objective "goodness," it's only a few short steps up from that one, too. BOO BOO BOO MAKE IT DIE.
Cyprus: "San Aggelos S’Agapisa," Christos Mylordos
Awww, I miss "Life Looks Better In Spring." But this isn't too bad. I LOVE the arrangements and use of traditional motives in the violin part. And for some reason, something about the melody and harmonies makes me think of a Spanish ballad. It's not boring, it's pretty...my only complaint is that little "my lady of soundtrack sorrow" bit about 2/3's through, when the drums and electric guitar suddenly kick in and there's that random generic-ethnic-woodle singing that happens. I like the way it all came together at the end, but the change was just kind of abrupt and didn't seem to fit initial. It was jarring. But not too bad otherwise. It won't make the finals, though. Too mellow.
Bulgaria: "Na Inat," Poli Genova
(The song starts a little over 2 minutes in)
Now this is a nice twist on the types of songs permeating the competition this year...not to mention a LOT less hilariously bad than last year's! Girl rock singers always make me happy, and it's nice that this girl has her own look (compared to the band, I mean), but can really sing and make the songs work. I'm getting some Within Temptation vibes here, in a good way. This is another one of my faves, right behind Serbia and Belgium, and just before Turkey. If the judges and voters can get past the language, I could see this going pretty damn far.
Macedonia: "Rusinka," Vlatko Ilievski
Okay, the opening riff? AWESOME. I wanted to hop up and dance the second I heard it. And the instrumentation in general? Way cool. But the song itself is too slow for me, and I'm not a big fan of the singer's voice. It's good but I'm not a fan of that kind of growly singing, personally. I just feel let down.
Israel: "Ding Dong," Dana International
O HAI DANA INTERNATIONAL. Fancy seeing you here again! ...oooo, but you don't sound nearly as nice on ballads as you do on more upbeat songs. Too nasal, hon. But still, a solid dance piece. Not going to get you another win, but how often does that happen, anyway?
Slovenia: "No One," Maja Keuc
I'm leery of making any comments on this one...because it's being translated into English for the show. But there aren't available recordings of it in English yet. She does have a nice voice (a bit more distinctive than some of the other R&B warblers, albeit very similar), her pitch is nice, the performance is good, the outfit is killer and I WANT IT, and there's something about the song (maybe the electric guitars, or the violins) that makes it stand out a little bit from the other "edgy" pop songs that are so overwhelming in the first semi-final. As it stands right now, I like it and definitely see it making the finals, but...once it's translated, will it lose something?
A preview:
Her voice is still lovely and her pronunciation is good...if the rest of the song is transliterated this well, it could be good. But if they go for a more literal translation or dumb down the lyrics for the sake of the melody...nah.
Romania: "Change," Hotel FM
This is another one that I really, really like. Overall, minus the Disney princess girls, the second semi-final seems to have more variety and overall stronger contenders so far...too bad it's 10 from each round that go to the finals, not just the 20 best overall. Anyway, onto the song; I like this a lot. The chorus is a bit of a letdown after the verses, but it's still nice (just not as exciting as I personally would like), and even the singer's silly, silly performance and outfit can't really detract from how fun this song is to listen to. Finals material, but Eurovision might find it too bland to put it in the top 10, which I would if it were up to me. (Granted, it'd be 9 or 10, but that's because there are five other REALLY strong contenders and a few others that I think will have more staying power than this one. But it'd still be on the list because OMG NICE FALSETTO THERE DUDE)
Estonia: "Rockefeller Street," Getter Jaani
Awwww, how cute! She's like Lena part 2, with a funky not-quite-ballad! Albeit with terrible eye makeup. But since when does Eurovision care about makeup? ...don't answer that. Anyway, yeah. Like it. Not one of the best, but one of the ones I like the most. It's different, it's cute, it's funky, it's fitting for the singer, the lyrics are really clever, the bridge makes me giggle...I could see this pulling a "Satellite"-style upset, but more likely it'll just place somewhere in the middle. After all, if they wanted Leno 2.0...well, they have Lena herself!
Belarus: "I Love Belarus," Anastasiya Vinnikova
Now, this song has some awesome arranging happening. But I HATE the singer's voice...it just sounds too dark and shaky, like a semi-trained classical singer trying to do pop badly. It doesn't help that the song itself is really, REALLY stupid. The instrumentals might be enough for people to vote it into the finals due to how catchy and danceable it is, but...I hope not.
Latvia: "Angel in Disguise," Musiqq
More of those growly vocals I'm not too big on. But not too bad, overall. I liked it better before the synthesized boop-boop thing came in on the chorus, but still, not bad. Just not great. Good, though.
Denmark: "New Tomorrow," A Friend in London
Wow, this is very Beatles-esque, somehow. The singer is clearly nervous (that's not vibrato, that's nerves...so hopefully he'll sound less like a goat during the main show?), but otherwise the song is pretty sweet and simple and nice. Sadly, it probably won't make the finals. It's just not exciting or memorable enough for anyone to vote for it.
...also, OMG THAT HAIR IS HILARIOUS BWAHAHAHAHAHA-
Ireland: "Lipstick," Jedward
...
...
...oh god. No. No no no no no no...
I TAKE IT BACK. I TAKE IT ALL BACK. All the complaints about the "dark, edgy" pop songs, the Disney princess boring white girl ballads, the offensive jerkwad song, the hair in Denmark, Portugal....okay, I don't take back Portugal, that song was still TERRIBLE. But everything else? I TAKE IT BACK. OH GOD I THOUGHT THEY WERE GONE. Then I thought, maybe they got better in the interim? BUT THEY DIDN'T. IRELAND WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING.
IF JEDWARD MAKES IT TO THE EUROVISION FINALS I WILL CRY FOR HUMANITY. And yet, I bet they will. They'll probably come in last, but what do you want to bet enough squealing, brain-damaged fangirls call in that they still make it that far?
MAKE IT DIE MAKE IT DIE MAKE IT DIE!!!!!!
...so. Um. Yeah. I apologize for that last bit. Not my rant, just the fact that the song and performance exists. I'm so, so sorry for that.
Next up (probably within the next 20 minutes, actually): The Big Five! Yes, FIVE. THANK YOU ITALY FOR COMING BACK WITH A BANG!