[seventeen]
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ for karaoke and Sensei~ <3
Karaoke tournament...? :)
Maybe I should enter...
And I like Mozart. ♥
[I feel weird. I think I should delete the whole entry. My head feels strange but I don't know why. So does my stomach. I feel nervous, like I'm about to jump out of my skin at any moment. I have too much energy, like I need to be moving but I don't know where to go. I wanna see Sei-chan but I haven't called him Sei-chan in years. He's Seiichi now, not Sei-chan or Sensei. Or he's only Sensei in front of other people. Doesn't matter though. Don't know what's wrong with me tonight but typing's helping. The feel of the keys beneath my fingers is helping. My head hurts though and I feel so jittery. I want to cry. I think I want to cry and Seiichi helped me cry a little earlier. I can't keep running to Seiichi every time I feel off-balance, no matter how much I want to. I don't know what's wrong with me but I want to find out. I need to know why I keep doing this so I can stop. Maybe it's the medication. There's always the possiblility that it's that or it needs to be changed. I haven't had an episode in a while. This morning I felt good. I still feel good now. I just need to focus. That's all. I'm here. I'm An. It's okay to be An. There's nothing scary or wrong about being An. I'm beautiful. I'm loved. I'm human. I'm not a monster. I'm just a person with problems like anyone else. My feelings aren't anything to be ashamed of. I can set my own standards. I can live my life the way I choose. I don't need to cling to anyone, I don't have to be anyone else. I can be An and I can need what An needs. I don't have to be anyone else. I can love someone and be loved in return. I can want someone and be wanted in return. I have as much of a right to happiness as anyone else. I can relax. I can calm down. I can focus. I can rest. I can rest. I can rest.
I can rest.
There.
I'm calmer now. I'll print this out and take it with me to my next session. Maybe Atobe will have some insight.]
[OOC: Strike's deleted. The stricken part was visible for a few minutes before she went back and deleted it so if you want, go ahead and have your character mention it.]
Karaoke tournament...? :)
Maybe I should enter...
And I like Mozart. ♥
[I feel weird. I think I should delete the whole entry. My head feels strange but I don't know why. So does my stomach. I feel nervous, like I'm about to jump out of my skin at any moment. I have too much energy, like I need to be moving but I don't know where to go. I wanna see Sei-chan but I haven't called him Sei-chan in years. He's Seiichi now, not Sei-chan or Sensei. Or he's only Sensei in front of other people. Doesn't matter though. Don't know what's wrong with me tonight but typing's helping. The feel of the keys beneath my fingers is helping. My head hurts though and I feel so jittery. I want to cry. I think I want to cry and Seiichi helped me cry a little earlier. I can't keep running to Seiichi every time I feel off-balance, no matter how much I want to. I don't know what's wrong with me but I want to find out. I need to know why I keep doing this so I can stop. Maybe it's the medication. There's always the possiblility that it's that or it needs to be changed. I haven't had an episode in a while. This morning I felt good. I still feel good now. I just need to focus. That's all. I'm here. I'm An. It's okay to be An. There's nothing scary or wrong about being An. I'm beautiful. I'm loved. I'm human. I'm not a monster. I'm just a person with problems like anyone else. My feelings aren't anything to be ashamed of. I can set my own standards. I can live my life the way I choose. I don't need to cling to anyone, I don't have to be anyone else. I can be An and I can need what An needs. I don't have to be anyone else. I can love someone and be loved in return. I can want someone and be wanted in return. I have as much of a right to happiness as anyone else. I can relax. I can calm down. I can focus. I can rest. I can rest. I can rest.
I can rest.
There.
I'm calmer now. I'll print this out and take it with me to my next session. Maybe Atobe will have some insight.]
[OOC: Strike's deleted. The stricken part was visible for a few minutes before she went back and deleted it so if you want, go ahead and have your character mention it.]