quick glance back

[justabrat]

Interesting to skim over my entries here... be it recent or even through the past year

Comments

[my2_front_teeth]

Go you on the drinking bit. . . Sounds like it and the move haven't done any harm, to say the least. I know-for me- quitting.drugs.period is something that's going to have to happen if I ever hope to have a chance at getting a life again. Doesn't matter that I can go days- even weeks, sometimes- without. I'm not a prohibitionist in any manner (I mean- alcohol and tobacco are far more dangerous and the latter more addictive than almost any given illegal drug) but since I can't use most substances in a manner anything less than excessive (=destructive), *I* apparently can't safely use those substances at all. I'm just loathe to subject myself to another label. Have you managed this all on your own or are you utilizing any kind of outside support? I ask because I've been to my share of 12-step meetings over the past couple of decades and generally find it to be a less-than-satisfying solution (for me, just for me). Definitely not a bad step for social support, but not enough (to say the least) when things are complicated with a mood

[justabrat]

Re: no drinking for 6 months? Honestly, the only reason I haven't is because of the last incident when I did. I promised my daughter the next day, while sobbing, because of the look of terror in her eyes when she told me of the night before and my behaviours. No, I was not abusive or anything even relatively close to that, but I was such a completely different person, that my daughters were scared to death that I wouldn't ever be the same.

I cannot have that happen again.
I've done the 12 step bullshit. I've done the rehab mess. It's alot of talk shit. You either put the shit down and not touch it again or you don't. end of story.
Ultimately, it is ALWAYS your (my) decision. And no, it sure as shit wasn't just booze..
I'm not saying it's been peaches and cream either...it fucking sucks especially when dark days roll around and you have nno other means of coping (friends)-
You just do what you have to I suppose...
I'm here (or myspace) anytime you want to talk, K?
xo

[terrislovebugs]

awww sweety, i know you have come a long way, I am very proud of you for how very far you have come in your life. I love you girlfriend and have all the faith in the world that you will overcome any and all obsticals that arise in your life. Love you always...