Weekend Whirlwind

[justin_nyc]

Where does the time go? As I just told one of the voyeurs on the previous thread, last night was great. We danced like kids and fucked like bunnies.

I thought Brian had rolled over about the tuition thing until I just read his final comment from last night.  Silly me.

Comments

[jans_intentions]

Brian does not roll over easy in any respect. Or does he? I don't think so. Even though I suspect it may happen more often then we're told. Would he be the man you love and butt heads with if he was okay with you supporting him? I'm not talking 'fair' here, but maybe more emotionally.

As for the tuition, as soon as I read the word 'tuition' I understood. Maybe Brian will see why now, because that was a beautiful thing he did, once upon a time.

[justin_nyc]

Brian likes to be in control. That's a given and I accept that. And you're right that he wouldn't be Brian if he suddenly became easy-going or passive.

Brian saved me in so many ways when my father checked out. I just wish he'd allow a little payback that wasn't in trade. Though I'm not really complaining.

[delvalmom]

ok-I can't believe this, but I can actually see Brian's point in this tuition thing, and I find that I understand and mostly agree with his reasoning.

I don't think your paying it was wrong exactly, but if you wanted to try to make a stand in equalizing financial responsibilities, maybe a $12,000 tuition bill was a bit over the top. (That's a lot of fucking money Justin!)

I mean, he would probably bitch about any bill you happened to see & then pay without discussing it with him. But if he freaked over, say a $200 electric bill, that would be insulting to you, but Peter's tuition falls under what he considers to be his personal responsibility and you took that out of his control by paying it.

But he's not gonna come out & say it like that, you know?

Anyway, overall you both seem to be in a better place than you were the past few months and I'm glad to see that.

[lady_jane]

maybe a $12,000 tuition bill was a bit over the top. (That's a lot of fucking money Justin!)

ITA with this, and the rest of the comment too. Especially since Brian is more concerned that you secure yourself with at least some of it - in investments or retirement funds.

Plus, if you think about Brian's upbringing, he arranged his entire life as a way of NOT depending on anyone financially because that was dangerous and painful. Financial independence is freedom.

I bet he's proud Justin's in a position to pay like that, but his insecurities concerns outweigh that.

And I'm sure Brian won't appreciate my saying it this way, either, bway!

[justin_nyc]

Brian's very haphazard about checking out my journal. When I least expect it - bingo he's here.

I understand Brian's focus on financial independence, but no matter what he says, he likes paying for all my shit and feels semi-threatened when I am able to do so myself. And it's like a crime if I cross the line and pay for him. I guess for all his modernity, he's just an old fashioned guy.

[jans_intentions]

Justin financially independent is Justin who might leave him.

[boonesfarmgirl]

Justin, I just want you to know that I totally understand why you did what you did. No matter what anyone says Peter is just as much "yours" as he is Brian's. Read my comment to Brian so I do not have to repeat.

As a single mom I used to pray that someone would come into my life and treat my children like they were their own. Why anyone would take you to task for treating Peter like he is yours is beyond me. We should all be so lucky to have that in out lives.

I told Brian that family is not always blood and he should know that better than anyone.

Missed you guys. xoxo

[justin_nyc]

Missed you too. Things are slowly getting back to normal.

I don't want to speak for Brian, but I think he'd agreed family is not always blood, but that financial responsibilty only applies to certain family members. I don't know. He's a complex man. Mostly for the good.

[justin_nyc]

Thanks. I only sell my stuff. At least for now. Just in PA - Just me.