My reason for living?

[k1ng0fpa1n]

I have really been thinking about this a lot, lately. Back when I attempted suicide, during the days leading up to my attempt, someone asked me, "Why do you live? Why not just kill yourself and get it over with?". My attempt failed then, and I accepted that I would have to live through my pain. Ever since then, I have been questioning my reason for

Comments

[gothic_lolita2]

I guess if I really think about it... I live because its all I've ever known. Also because theres a lot in life that I want and I'm not willing to give up on getting them.

[k1ng0fpa1n]

There is a lot in life that I want. I already have a lot of the things I wanted, but there are still more things I would like to have. I want someone to love, someone that loves me. I want to have children, and raise them in a loving environment. I want to grow old with someone, and be happy. What happens when even the chance of that gets ripped from your life? What happens when you realize that you will never have those things that would make your life complete? What happens when you feel like your world has come crashing down around you, and you lose all hope of ever being happy? Then what do you do?

In my case, I welcome death... I even pray for it, sometimes.

[rejectdude3]

I ask myself that question a lot and am able to cancel any reason that comes to mind except for "my friends". It's not that I think they wouldn't be able to live without me, I just wouldn't want to not be able to see or talk to them again. They mean too much to me to just leave them like that. I guess also that death is something that scares me a lot, far more than any of my phobias. I get panic attacks if I start thinking about death and what comes after you die.

[skrying_89]

I was a few hours from suicide too......But I changed my mind at the last moment. because of Famke. I saw her on the night I was supposed to die. I don't really know my reason for living but I know the reason I'm still here is because of her.