Without You
Title: Without You
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/Focus: Dongwoo/Hoya
Summary: Infinite H starts their promotions, and Dongwoo has some problems.
A/N: HI. I'M BACK. For real this time, none of that posting and then disappearing crap. I'm writing again! This is inspired by my freaking otp and their sexy freaking song that gives me lots of feelings. ugh
Infinite H sounded like a great idea, at first. Dongwoo thought that he and Howon were decent rappers, and they were pretty popular with their fans and the general public. A subgroup sounded like fun- a different experience- an adventure even. He didn't really factor in the fact that he and Howon were going to spend a lot of time together. A lot of time. Alone.
Dongwoo’s not really sure that it’s such a great idea anymore.
It’s late. It that time in the early hours of the day where Dongwoo’s not really sure if it’s considered night or morning. The couch in the recording studio has become a makeshift bed, no matter how uncomfortable. Howon’s in the booth in front of the microphone. Primary had okayed his vocals a while ago, and had even left to use the bathroom, but as the perfectionist Howon is, he keeps singing the line over and over again until it sounds right to his own ears. “Without You” is Dongwoo’s favorite song from their new album, but he’s feeling a little uncomfortable hearing Hoya singing it over and over. Especially because he’s going over the back up vocals for Zion. T’s part. And, really, it’s too late at night/morning for Hoya’s voice to be so breathy and low with those “baby, baby”s and Dongwoo does not want to have to deal with that that right now.
“I wanna feel you, we’re getting stronger, I wanna listen to you, ‘cuz I love you so much-”
Okay, now this is just ridiculous. That’s not even Howon’s part, and Zion. T doesn’t need any back-up vocals. It doesn’t matter if Howon’s singing it an octave lower and his voice sounds a little rougher and a maybe a bit se- Dongwoo closes his eyes. It’s too early for this.
Primary comes back in from the restroom. Howon finishes recording the rest of the chorus, and then they’re finally done. Dongwoo’s still stretched out across the couch with his eyes closed, and he hears Howon chuckle quietly when the other comes out of the booth. Howon thanks Primary, who will meet with them later that week. Dongwoo hears another door close, still faking unconsiousness. A second later, there are cold fingers lightly touching the curve of his jaw, right under his ear.
“Time to wake up, hyung. We’re done for today.” Howon’s voice is quiet, a little raspy, and still low. Dongwoo ignores the tingle that runs down his spine.
He slowly blinks his eyes open, pretending to squint at the light. He’s always been a pretty good actor. Howon’s fingers unconsiously slip down to Dongwoo’s chin as he looks over his shoulder at the door of the studio. He presses a gentle thumb to the indent under Dongwoo’s bottom lip before pulling his hand away to grab his bag and water bottle. Dongwoo gets up slowly, his muscles stiff, and follows Howon out the door. He denies the desire to replay the feeling of Howon’s touch over and over in his head. It sort of works.
-
Dongwoo gets tired of the studio very quickly. The studio is small and boring after about half and hour, and making a new album requires hours and hours of recording and re-recording and commenting and maybe a little bit of fighting. It’s all very tiring. Dongwoo hates being cooped up in one place for too long; it makes him crazy.
He and Howon have been stuck in the recording studio for six hours, going over the rough outline of “Victorious Way” and putting the finishing touches on “Without You”. Needless to say, Dongwoo’s more than a little loopy, giggling more than usual and occassionally breaking out into horrible renditions of American songs. Howon gets quieter the longer they spend recording, and he somehow seems both relaxed and on edge, his expression calm but his feet or fingers constantly tapping. The two end up sitting side by side on the couch while Zion.T records- both tired and exhausted and ready to leave. Dongwoo’s got his legs crossed underneath him as he fiddles with his phone, mindlessly scrolling through Twitter. Howon leans his head against the back of the couch, his fingers tapping his thigh unconsciously.
“Stop that,” Dongwoo says suddenly, grabbing Howon’s fingers to calm them without looking up from his phone screen. “It’s so annoying.”
Howon lets out a gush of air in a half-hearted chuckle. “What am I supposed to do with my fingers, then?”
“I don’t know- anything but that. As long as it’s not irritating.” Dongwoo refocuses on his phone, scrolling down, down, down. He’s almost reached last month. He opens Woohyun’s account, out of pure boredom, when he feels something brush the back of his neck. He stiffens automatically, fingers halting.
“Is this annoying?” Howon whispers. His fingers dance lightly across the back of Dongwoo’s neck, tracing his spine down between his shoulder blades, then up to the base of his hair, gently carding through it.
Oh. Dongwoo closes his eyes, breathing deeply as the touch sends tingles through his skin. “No. It’s not.” No, it’s perfect and amazing and feels wonderful even though he knows it shouldn’t.
He glances over to see Howon smile slightly with his eyes still closed. “Good.”
And they stay like that, Dongwoo bent over his phone, crosslegged, with Howon’s hand running up and down his back until their manager tells them that it’s time to go home.
-
The night before Infinite H’s debut stage is filled with both exhaustion and excitement. Howon and Dongwoo stay in the practice rooms well past midnight. Past one o’clock. Past two o’clock. They run the choreography over and over, voices raspy as they repeat their lines until there are no mistakes. Dongwoo’s long past tiredness, he thinks- he’s to the point where he’s so tired that he doesn’t even feel tired anymore. Just…raw. Howon looks like he feels the same, with his face covered in sweat but the determined fire still blazing in his eyes.
At two thirty in the morning, the choreographer finally claps his hands. Dongwoo takes a huge breath, bending over and fixing his hands on his knees. A hand wraps around his waist and he jerks upright, all the air leaving his lungs in a huge whoosh. Howon’s eyes are tired but not dull, that ever-present sparkle still alive in the aftermath of performing. “You ready for tomorrow?”
Dongwoo’s tired- too tired to deal with Howon’s ridiculous sweetness and his close proximity, but he’s also too tired to resist, so he slides a hand over Howon’s and leans in until his forehead rests against the side of Howon’s face. He closes his eyes and breathes in slowly. “Yeah,” he says when he lets his breath go. “I’m ready.”
Howon’s grip on his waist tightens, and he gently presses his nose to the side of Dongwoo’s head. Now this is just unfair. Totally and completely unfair. Dongwoo pulls away and grabs his bag, and after a moment, Howon follows.
The other members have switched around in the dorm so that Dongwoo and Howon can room together. That way, they won’t wake anyone up when they come home late from schedules or practice. Dongwoo isn’t quite sure if he is thankful for that or not.
When they reach the dorm, Dongwoo flings his bag onto his bed and collapses face down. Howon, ever the dedicated idol, heads immediately to the closet to grab a towel. “You can’t go to bed sweaty, hyung. It’s bad for your skin. And we have our debut tomorrow.”
Damn Howon for being so freaking caring. He’s even speaking in a whisper so he doesn’t wake up the other members. His voice low and husky and completely unnecessary in Dongwoo’s opinion. It’s too late to deal with this.
“Dongwoo,” Howon says again, but this time his voice is closer. Dongwoo feels his mattress dip, and then there is a warm hand on the small of his back. “Dongwoo, please get up and take a shower.”
Dongwoo’s tired- he’s so tired that he’s practically delusional. That’s the only explanation for why he turns over so quickly that he has a short moment to take in Howon’s surprised face, which is only a few inches away from his, before grabbing his collar and pulling it sharply.
Howon falls forward with a yelp, one arm pressing into the mattress above Dongwoo’s head to keep him from crushing Dongwoo beneath him. His chest hits Dongwoo’s and then- then Dongwoo tilts his head upwards. He feels their lips touch, just a slight press of his against Howon’s. He senses Howon still above him. It lasts only for a second before Dongwoo pulls away, drawing his chin down but not letting go of Howon’s collar. There’s a beat of silence.
When Dongwoo chances a glance up, Howon’s staring down at him in complete surprise. It would almost be funny if they were in any other situation. Howon opens his mouth, his eyes darting down to Dongwoo’s lips and then back. “Did you just-”
“Yeah,” Dongwoo whispers. He watches as Howon’s tongue runs over his lips unconsciously. Howon doesn’t move forward, but he isn’t moving away, his hand still braced above Dongwoo’s head. “Is….is that okay?”
Howon’s eyes dart down again, and he blinks a few times. “I- yeah. Yeah, I think so.” He carefully bends his head down, pressing his lips against Dongwoo’s this time. It’s short and sweet, and Howon pulls away first. “Yeah, it’s okay.”
Dongwoo smiles. “Good,” he says, before threading his fingers into Howon’s hair and pulling his head down so they can kiss again. Howon’s mouth is pliant and eager, and it feels good, so good, against Dongwoo’s. Dongwoo wonders idly what tomorrow will be like, when they’re not delusional and tired and have to perform onstage with the weight of this- this thing- resting on their shoulders. He ponders it for a few seconds, but then Howon pulls his lower lip into his mouth. He decides that he can worry about tomorrow later.
-
The next morning comes too soon. Dongwoo loses himself in the midst of backup dancers and staff members and coordi noonas and camera crews. He’s getting his suit jacket brushed to perfection when he glances across the waiting room. Howon catches his eye in the mirror from where he sits getting his hair gelled and sculpted by a stylist’s skilled fingers. They lock gazes for a moment and Dongwoo holds his breath. Then Howon’s smiling at him and he smiles back, and it’s okay, it’s all okay.
As they wait backstage there are cameras in their faces for a “Behind the Scenes Special”, and they’re joking around, trying to shake off the nervousness.
“So Dongwoo, who put that kiss mark on your hair?” Dongwoo turns to see Howon grinning at him. He knows that they’re putting on their Infinite face, their idol image for the camera, but Dongwoo’s curious.
“You know it was you,” he replies, shooting Howon a coy look before laughing his signature laugh, smoothing it out as a joke for their viewers.
But he catches Howon’s response- the quick swipe of a tongue against his lips and a sharp, seductive wink before the camera turns and his face morphs into affectionate annoyance.
Dongwoo bites back a smirk. He can definitely work with this.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/Focus: Dongwoo/Hoya
Summary: Infinite H starts their promotions, and Dongwoo has some problems.
A/N: HI. I'M BACK. For real this time, none of that posting and then disappearing crap. I'm writing again! This is inspired by my freaking otp and their sexy freaking song that gives me lots of feelings. ugh
Infinite H sounded like a great idea, at first. Dongwoo thought that he and Howon were decent rappers, and they were pretty popular with their fans and the general public. A subgroup sounded like fun- a different experience- an adventure even. He didn't really factor in the fact that he and Howon were going to spend a lot of time together. A lot of time. Alone.
Dongwoo’s not really sure that it’s such a great idea anymore.
It’s late. It that time in the early hours of the day where Dongwoo’s not really sure if it’s considered night or morning. The couch in the recording studio has become a makeshift bed, no matter how uncomfortable. Howon’s in the booth in front of the microphone. Primary had okayed his vocals a while ago, and had even left to use the bathroom, but as the perfectionist Howon is, he keeps singing the line over and over again until it sounds right to his own ears. “Without You” is Dongwoo’s favorite song from their new album, but he’s feeling a little uncomfortable hearing Hoya singing it over and over. Especially because he’s going over the back up vocals for Zion. T’s part. And, really, it’s too late at night/morning for Hoya’s voice to be so breathy and low with those “baby, baby”s and Dongwoo does not want to have to deal with that that right now.
“I wanna feel you, we’re getting stronger, I wanna listen to you, ‘cuz I love you so much-”
Okay, now this is just ridiculous. That’s not even Howon’s part, and Zion. T doesn’t need any back-up vocals. It doesn’t matter if Howon’s singing it an octave lower and his voice sounds a little rougher and a maybe a bit se- Dongwoo closes his eyes. It’s too early for this.
Primary comes back in from the restroom. Howon finishes recording the rest of the chorus, and then they’re finally done. Dongwoo’s still stretched out across the couch with his eyes closed, and he hears Howon chuckle quietly when the other comes out of the booth. Howon thanks Primary, who will meet with them later that week. Dongwoo hears another door close, still faking unconsiousness. A second later, there are cold fingers lightly touching the curve of his jaw, right under his ear.
“Time to wake up, hyung. We’re done for today.” Howon’s voice is quiet, a little raspy, and still low. Dongwoo ignores the tingle that runs down his spine.
He slowly blinks his eyes open, pretending to squint at the light. He’s always been a pretty good actor. Howon’s fingers unconsiously slip down to Dongwoo’s chin as he looks over his shoulder at the door of the studio. He presses a gentle thumb to the indent under Dongwoo’s bottom lip before pulling his hand away to grab his bag and water bottle. Dongwoo gets up slowly, his muscles stiff, and follows Howon out the door. He denies the desire to replay the feeling of Howon’s touch over and over in his head. It sort of works.
-
Dongwoo gets tired of the studio very quickly. The studio is small and boring after about half and hour, and making a new album requires hours and hours of recording and re-recording and commenting and maybe a little bit of fighting. It’s all very tiring. Dongwoo hates being cooped up in one place for too long; it makes him crazy.
He and Howon have been stuck in the recording studio for six hours, going over the rough outline of “Victorious Way” and putting the finishing touches on “Without You”. Needless to say, Dongwoo’s more than a little loopy, giggling more than usual and occassionally breaking out into horrible renditions of American songs. Howon gets quieter the longer they spend recording, and he somehow seems both relaxed and on edge, his expression calm but his feet or fingers constantly tapping. The two end up sitting side by side on the couch while Zion.T records- both tired and exhausted and ready to leave. Dongwoo’s got his legs crossed underneath him as he fiddles with his phone, mindlessly scrolling through Twitter. Howon leans his head against the back of the couch, his fingers tapping his thigh unconsciously.
“Stop that,” Dongwoo says suddenly, grabbing Howon’s fingers to calm them without looking up from his phone screen. “It’s so annoying.”
Howon lets out a gush of air in a half-hearted chuckle. “What am I supposed to do with my fingers, then?”
“I don’t know- anything but that. As long as it’s not irritating.” Dongwoo refocuses on his phone, scrolling down, down, down. He’s almost reached last month. He opens Woohyun’s account, out of pure boredom, when he feels something brush the back of his neck. He stiffens automatically, fingers halting.
“Is this annoying?” Howon whispers. His fingers dance lightly across the back of Dongwoo’s neck, tracing his spine down between his shoulder blades, then up to the base of his hair, gently carding through it.
Oh. Dongwoo closes his eyes, breathing deeply as the touch sends tingles through his skin. “No. It’s not.” No, it’s perfect and amazing and feels wonderful even though he knows it shouldn’t.
He glances over to see Howon smile slightly with his eyes still closed. “Good.”
And they stay like that, Dongwoo bent over his phone, crosslegged, with Howon’s hand running up and down his back until their manager tells them that it’s time to go home.
-
The night before Infinite H’s debut stage is filled with both exhaustion and excitement. Howon and Dongwoo stay in the practice rooms well past midnight. Past one o’clock. Past two o’clock. They run the choreography over and over, voices raspy as they repeat their lines until there are no mistakes. Dongwoo’s long past tiredness, he thinks- he’s to the point where he’s so tired that he doesn’t even feel tired anymore. Just…raw. Howon looks like he feels the same, with his face covered in sweat but the determined fire still blazing in his eyes.
At two thirty in the morning, the choreographer finally claps his hands. Dongwoo takes a huge breath, bending over and fixing his hands on his knees. A hand wraps around his waist and he jerks upright, all the air leaving his lungs in a huge whoosh. Howon’s eyes are tired but not dull, that ever-present sparkle still alive in the aftermath of performing. “You ready for tomorrow?”
Dongwoo’s tired- too tired to deal with Howon’s ridiculous sweetness and his close proximity, but he’s also too tired to resist, so he slides a hand over Howon’s and leans in until his forehead rests against the side of Howon’s face. He closes his eyes and breathes in slowly. “Yeah,” he says when he lets his breath go. “I’m ready.”
Howon’s grip on his waist tightens, and he gently presses his nose to the side of Dongwoo’s head. Now this is just unfair. Totally and completely unfair. Dongwoo pulls away and grabs his bag, and after a moment, Howon follows.
The other members have switched around in the dorm so that Dongwoo and Howon can room together. That way, they won’t wake anyone up when they come home late from schedules or practice. Dongwoo isn’t quite sure if he is thankful for that or not.
When they reach the dorm, Dongwoo flings his bag onto his bed and collapses face down. Howon, ever the dedicated idol, heads immediately to the closet to grab a towel. “You can’t go to bed sweaty, hyung. It’s bad for your skin. And we have our debut tomorrow.”
Damn Howon for being so freaking caring. He’s even speaking in a whisper so he doesn’t wake up the other members. His voice low and husky and completely unnecessary in Dongwoo’s opinion. It’s too late to deal with this.
“Dongwoo,” Howon says again, but this time his voice is closer. Dongwoo feels his mattress dip, and then there is a warm hand on the small of his back. “Dongwoo, please get up and take a shower.”
Dongwoo’s tired- he’s so tired that he’s practically delusional. That’s the only explanation for why he turns over so quickly that he has a short moment to take in Howon’s surprised face, which is only a few inches away from his, before grabbing his collar and pulling it sharply.
Howon falls forward with a yelp, one arm pressing into the mattress above Dongwoo’s head to keep him from crushing Dongwoo beneath him. His chest hits Dongwoo’s and then- then Dongwoo tilts his head upwards. He feels their lips touch, just a slight press of his against Howon’s. He senses Howon still above him. It lasts only for a second before Dongwoo pulls away, drawing his chin down but not letting go of Howon’s collar. There’s a beat of silence.
When Dongwoo chances a glance up, Howon’s staring down at him in complete surprise. It would almost be funny if they were in any other situation. Howon opens his mouth, his eyes darting down to Dongwoo’s lips and then back. “Did you just-”
“Yeah,” Dongwoo whispers. He watches as Howon’s tongue runs over his lips unconsciously. Howon doesn’t move forward, but he isn’t moving away, his hand still braced above Dongwoo’s head. “Is….is that okay?”
Howon’s eyes dart down again, and he blinks a few times. “I- yeah. Yeah, I think so.” He carefully bends his head down, pressing his lips against Dongwoo’s this time. It’s short and sweet, and Howon pulls away first. “Yeah, it’s okay.”
Dongwoo smiles. “Good,” he says, before threading his fingers into Howon’s hair and pulling his head down so they can kiss again. Howon’s mouth is pliant and eager, and it feels good, so good, against Dongwoo’s. Dongwoo wonders idly what tomorrow will be like, when they’re not delusional and tired and have to perform onstage with the weight of this- this thing- resting on their shoulders. He ponders it for a few seconds, but then Howon pulls his lower lip into his mouth. He decides that he can worry about tomorrow later.
-
The next morning comes too soon. Dongwoo loses himself in the midst of backup dancers and staff members and coordi noonas and camera crews. He’s getting his suit jacket brushed to perfection when he glances across the waiting room. Howon catches his eye in the mirror from where he sits getting his hair gelled and sculpted by a stylist’s skilled fingers. They lock gazes for a moment and Dongwoo holds his breath. Then Howon’s smiling at him and he smiles back, and it’s okay, it’s all okay.
As they wait backstage there are cameras in their faces for a “Behind the Scenes Special”, and they’re joking around, trying to shake off the nervousness.
“So Dongwoo, who put that kiss mark on your hair?” Dongwoo turns to see Howon grinning at him. He knows that they’re putting on their Infinite face, their idol image for the camera, but Dongwoo’s curious.
“You know it was you,” he replies, shooting Howon a coy look before laughing his signature laugh, smoothing it out as a joke for their viewers.
But he catches Howon’s response- the quick swipe of a tongue against his lips and a sharp, seductive wink before the camera turns and his face morphs into affectionate annoyance.
Dongwoo bites back a smirk. He can definitely work with this.