One of the biggest problems in depression is NOT being able to recognize the problems, because you don't think they're problems, you think that that's the way things are SUPPOSED to be and everyone ELSE is crazy for not having that fear, or that destructive thought. Or elsewise it's okay that other people don't think or do that thing, but it's TOTALLY just a PART OF WHO YOU ARE and they're not showing you part of the disease, they're showing you part of YOU and that's not FAIR.
Which is to say, progress isn't always pleasant.
You should daytrip out my way sometime with that husband-creature of yours. We have interesting things to do and see!
Ugh, yeah. I've gotten a lot better at recognizing the completely irrational stuff, but it's still hard. I think it would be easier if I hadn't been just getting by for as long as I have - thinking back, I can remember anxiety and panic attacks and so on as far back as first grade. I've been coping with depression for more than half my life. It was a huge part of the development of my adult personality. I don't know who I am without it, so my instincts say to cling to it, and it's frustrating and painful to try and get away from that.
And yes, we definitely need to plan a daytrip. Sometime. *is bad at planning*
I too got an iPhone for Christmas, and yes they are oh so wonderfully shiny.
Re: all that other stuff, you're not alone. It's amazing how big a gap there is between knowing things intellectually and accepting them on an emotional level. And it's probably harder on people who are used to "getting things" very quickly, for lack of having to learn that kind of patience in other situations. Just... don't beat yourself up too much, okay? It's hard to get better when you're continually piling bruises on yourself for not being better enough.
Hah, my therapist always seems to comment on me beating myself up too. I should probably start listening at some point...
Also, regarding iPhones... I don't think its even registered for me that it's a phone yet. I mean, yeah, it calls people and Facetime is a wonderful thing (I can talk to mom! And see that she's laying in bed with our very ancient and pushy cat attempting to get affection from her head!) but it doesn't seem like a phone.
Man, I LOVE Myst! Still one of my favorite games. The rest of the series is okay, but that first game is just so damn much fun.
The first time I played it (at age 9) I opened the blue book and Achenar scared the HELL out of me. And that was before I found all their various paraphernalia.
If you want to play Exile, that one's pretty good, too, and features Brad Dourif acting crazypants, too. Kinda fun.
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Which is to say, progress isn't always pleasant.
You should daytrip out my way sometime with that husband-creature of yours. We have interesting things to do and see!
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And yes, we definitely need to plan a daytrip. Sometime. *is bad at planning*
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Re: all that other stuff, you're not alone. It's amazing how big a gap there is between knowing things intellectually and accepting them on an emotional level. And it's probably harder on people who are used to "getting things" very quickly, for lack of having to learn that kind of patience in other situations. Just... don't beat yourself up too much, okay? It's hard to get better when you're continually piling bruises on yourself for not being better enough.
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Also, regarding iPhones... I don't think its even registered for me that it's a phone yet. I mean, yeah, it calls people and Facetime is a wonderful thing (I can talk to mom! And see that she's laying in bed with our very ancient and pushy cat attempting to get affection from her head!) but it doesn't seem like a phone.
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I hope your new job is going well!
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The first time I played it (at age 9) I opened the blue book and Achenar scared the HELL out of me. And that was before I found all their various paraphernalia.
If you want to play Exile, that one's pretty good, too, and features Brad Dourif acting crazypants, too. Kinda fun.
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